And Sing of Sweet Surrender - Part Eleven
That the cleverest acting
Was the lying by you
Lying by you
Lying by you
The murder of the college socialite had been completely gruesome, so naturally Jess and Jo had found themselves in Chicago, asking questions, quietly. They’d poked around her apartment and found absolutely nothing useful there, but they did manage to find that she had been attacked on her way home from work, so they headed to the bar where she had worked.
Though everyone was willing to talk about the case, no one seemed to know anything. They just wanted to cry and pretend that she’d been their best friend ever.
Finally, thumping down in one of the booths, Jess offered the other a glass. “This bar might have been a bust.”
“I’m starting to think the same thing,” she sighed, sipping at her glass. “Thanks. So what’s the plan of action now? Go to her school, see if we can find out what happened to her?”
“I guess so,” she murmured.
“Damn. I’d been hoping we could start the hunt tonight… it’s been too long since the Mishibizhiw, I really want to kill something.”
“You were recovering, Jo.” She said firmly, crossing her arms on the edge of the table, considering her lover seriously. “There was no way we were going to hunt anything until the wounds were completely healed. So yeah, it’s been awhile, but I don’t want to rush into this thing if you’re not feeling well…”
“I’m feeling fine.” She said firmly. “I am fine. I totally understand, but I am fine.”
“I just don’t want to lose my girl,” she smiled softly, watching the other quietly, reaching over the table to squeeze Jo’s fingers. “I finally got you healthy and whole, I don’t want to lose out.”
She smiled softly, relaxing. “But it’s been a month.”
“I know. But if we ever run into your mother, would you rather tell her you ripped stitches open from a hunt while killing a demon, or would you rather tell her you took a month off and recovered properly beforehand?”
Jo groaned. “That’s fighting dirty.”
“But being smart,” she grinned, amused.
“Yeah, yeah, sure…” looking around the small bar, Jo frowned slightly. “If the place was busier, we might have a little more luck with finding information. But there’s barely anyone here…”
“Yeah, I know. Okay, here’s the plan of attack.” Jess sat up a little straighter. “I’ll go left, you go right.”
She snorted, quirking a brow.
“I mean, I’m going that way, to flirt and chat and try and get information,” she pointed to the left. “You go to the right, and talk to them.”
“No flirting?” Jo asked, sweetly.
“Nope.” Jess grinned, standing, and bending over the table to kiss the other quickly. “Save the flirting for me.”
“You don’t own me,” she snickered, but winked at the taller woman, and slipped past her as she headed into the quiet bar, to the right, into the shadows on the other side of the bar, looking for someone to be a good target for talking to.
Jess smirked after her, watching the woman she was rapidly beginning to fall head over heels for walk into the shadows, then headed over to the pool tables, trying to strike up conversation.
Finally, pretty sure she’d gotten all the information she was going to, Jess set out to look for Jo. Maybe the other woman had found something hopefully more useful than the bare bone “facts” Jess had gleaned from the drunk off their asses guys that liked hanging out in the bar this time of night. Spotting her girl’s blonde head amongst the crowd, she headed over to her table. Jo was talking to someone, laughing. Maybe she’d found something.
“Hey babe,” she said quietly, resting her hand on Jo’s shoulder as she stepped up beside her.
“Hey, Jess!” she beamed, smiling up at her with bright eyes. “I want you to meet someone…” she held her hand out to the other woman sitting at the table. The woman smiled an enigmatic, Mona Lisa smile, and Jess felt her blood run cold.
“This is Meg.”
Time seemed to slow down. Jess’ first instinct was to pull her gun out and start shooting, but the thus far limited experience she had had with demons thus far told her that this was a supremely bad idea. demons were fast - supernaturally so - and would absolutely be gone before she could have a chance to fire. Besides, she was pretty sure that bullets weren’t really going to bother her. (Hadn’t she been shot once with the whole werewolf thing, and that sure hadn’t fazed her.) An exorcism in the middle of a bar really didn’t seem like a good idea, either. After all, if Meg decided to kill people because she was pissed, she had piles of targets.
“We’ve met,” Meg said, casually, resting her chin in her hand, smirking at Jess.
“Oh, really?” Jo looked up, surprised, eyes flicking to Jess’ face. And then her expression changed, the slight bemusement shifting instantly into concern as she saw the expression on her lover’s face, alarmed.
“It was you.” Jess said, without hesitation in her voice.
“Naturally,” the demon drawled, amused as she considered them both. “But we’re not really here to point fingers, are we?”
“No,” she said, voice cold. “We’re here to kill you.”
“Oh, to kill me,” Meg snorted, drawling.
“…we are?” Jo murmured.
“Oh yes, she’s definitely here to kill me,” Meg smirked, eyes crinkling as she grinned at Jo. “Careful with this one, Jo… I’m pretty sure she has a habit of killing all her girlfriends after she breaks up with them.”
“Girlfriend…?” the woman tensed. “This is the demon, isn’t it?”
Jess just nodded, squeezing Jo’s shoulder very tightly.
“So anyway, very nice to see you, Jessie baby, but I’ve got bigger fish to fry in this town,” she drawled, stretching lazily. She seemed almost… casual about this whole thing. Like it was the most comfortable lazy thing in the world, to run into a pair of hunters when you were a demon planning on killing people - especially when one of the hunters was your ex. “So why don’t you run on now. You know you can’t do anything here anyway.”
Jess just squeezed Jo’s shoulder tighter, trying to resist the instinct to just throw herself over the table and pounding the other into pulp.
Jo just winced slightly.
“You know you don’t want to do this, Jess.” Meg said firmly. “Your day is coming, but believe me, babe… this isn’t it.”
“Let’s go,” she said quietly.
Nodding, Jo stood, quickly, and together, the two hunters all but fled the bar.
An hour later, Jess’ hands were still trembling as she drove out of the city too quickly, hands shaking on the wheel even though she tried to maintain calm and act normal. It was hard, though, especially since the car was quiet, but extremely tense.
Worst though, was the guilt. Crushing down like Atlas’ weight, Jess could only seem to focus on the knowledge that not only had she found what had killed that girl, she had knowingly left the killer unscathed. Sure, she’d done it to protect the innocent kids in that college bar that would’ve become collateral damage, but that didn’t actually make her feel much better.
“I trust you,” Jo murmured.
Blinking, she tore her eyes from the road ahead to glance at her lover. “Hm?”
“I trust you.” She said again. “I think you did the right thing. I trust your judgment, Jess.”
She snorted. “I left a demon. Well. Alive.”
“Yeah, well….” Jo shifted in her seat. “How many people in that bar would she have managed to, or attempted to kill before we would be able to send black smoke running?”
“Knowing Meg,” Jess murmured, “All of them.”
“You see?” Jo pointed out, spreading her palms out to Jess, almost beseeching her to listen. “You did the right thing. We know where she is now, we can lay a trap for her, and once we find her weaknesses, lure her into our little trap, then spring it on her. Blammo. Revenge is yours.”
Jess laughed weakly. “I thought we were done with revenge on demons?”
The other snorted. “And you call yourself a hunter?”
----
They say we can love who we can chose
But what is love without lust
Two hearts with accurate devotions
What are feelings without emotions
I’m going in for the kill
Jess shifted in the massive bed that they had ended up with in the most recent in a long string of skeezy motels. This one had the massive bed that most of the others didn’t, but unfortunately, the rest of the room didn’t really live up to the reputation of the bed - it filled almost the entire place. They had to turn sideways to get from the bed to the bathroom door, and even then, the door didn’t open the whole way.
Still, the massive, comfortable bed was a bonus, as was the little rusty metal box on the headboard. The one that Jo had been steadily feeding quarters into for the last couple hours.
So with the ceiling mounted tv playing shit television, they lay side by side in the massive bed, legs and arms just barely touching as the mattress shifted slightly under them, vibrating nicely. It was supposed to work every knot out of their muscles, and if Jess had her way, they’d sleep in beds like this forever. It did seem to be slowly working the kinks out, though last time she’d gone to the bathroom, she’d been surprised to notice that some of her body still felt like it was faintly vibrating. Odd.
“Mmm,” she sighed softly as the vibrating stopped, and Jo sat up to dig in her pockets again. “Why are we watching this?”
“Because watching rebellious teenagers scream ‘you don’t know me, you don’t know me’ requires no actual thinking, and neither of us is really in the mood for thinking. Well, I’m not, anyway,” Jo snorted, glancing at Jess. “I kinda assumed you didn’t want to either, since you’re the one who put Maury on in the first place.”
“I didn’t know it was a marathon,” she muttered, smirking slightly.
“It’s not technically a marathon…” Jo pointed out, dropping another quarter in the machine, and twisting the little crank. Instantly, the mattress started vibrating again, and she sighed, happily. “It’s episodes of Maury and Jerry Springer, put back to back, over and over again. So it’s a ‘fake talk show’ marathon.”
“Ah. Thank you so kindly for correcting me,” Jess drawled, smirking up at Jo.
“Thank you, milady,” she laughed, reaching down to brush the other’s loose curls carefully behind her ear. The room was lit only by the television and the dim glow of the streetlights outside falling through the blinds. It was slatted when it fell finally on them, light cut into sharp slices by the darkness, making every movement almost mysterious. “I feel like we’re in a film noir movie.”
“Mmm. Am I the private eye, then, or am I the hussy poured into her dress who wants to hire you?” Jess asked, smiling softly.
“You’re definitely the hussy,” Jo grinned, amused by the very idea. “I’m the private eye, the private dick.”
“Dick?”
She snorted. “Not dick dick. I mean, like… detective. That’s what they called them in those old film noir movies. Private dicks.”
“Sure,” Jess smirked.
“And you, my lovely lady…” Jo laughed, leaning over Jess to press her lips gently to hers. “Are my street smart, world weary brilliant hussy, with legs that go up to forever, and curves so curvy that I wish I was a car on your road, just so I could ride them all the way down.” She kissed her again. “They pour you into your dress, and you get to saunter into the room and poke me in the chest with the toe of your gorgeously dangerous stilettos, but even though you pretend to be all vulnerable and badass, you are either the secret villain of the story who is setting me up to fall, or you’re secretly just putting up a front and trying to seem tougher than you are because you are secretly scared, and need me, the private eye, to run in and save you.”
“With your dick.” She laughed.
“No dicks.” The other laughed, shaking her head. “Not even one.”
“Good. I might be a little freaked out if there was.” Jess rolled up and over, knocking Jo back onto the vibrating bed, leaning over her, loose golden curls cascading down around her head like a strawberry scented curtain. A car drove past their motel, and the headlights skimmed across the wall, through their blinds, sliding over Jess slowly, starting at her head, then down to her bare feet before fading off into the distance.
“You look like an angel,” Jo murmured, slightly breathless.
“Back from the dead, yes. Angel, no.” Jess murmured, and bent to kiss her lover, softly, fingers slipping to begin slowly unbuttoning the other’s blue plaid shirt.
They had played around, a little. Kissing had become a staple of their daily life, and sometimes it had shifted beyond just kissing to the point where they were both left trembling and breathless. They slept together, mostly naked, they had fleetingly touched each other, but… it had almost been like a line, that both of them wasn’t entirely comfortable crossing. It wasn’t because neither of them wanted it. Maybe it was because both of them wanted it too much, and they were afraid of ruining it if they finally took that plunge.
But neither hesitated now, though the gentleness with which Jess unbuttoned Jo’s shirt, and gently pushed it off her shoulders was almost painstakingly slow.
Just because something is not rushed does not mean that it is not urgent.
Fingers skimming just gently over the other’s smooth skin, Jess unhooked the two little metal hooks at the front of Jo’s bra. She’d asked, once, why the other woman wore front hook bras, and Jo had admitted, while pitching pillows at her giggling companion, that she’d just never managed to get the hang of the back attaching kind. She ‘felt like a chicken, with her arms stuck behind her, like that’, and right now, as Jess gently slid the bra off of her, without Jo ever lifting off the bed, she had to say that she wasn’t going to complain.
“Mmm… now I feel like this is sorta uneven,” Jo smiled up at Jess, shifting slightly on the bed.
“I’m admiring,” Jess breathed, bending to press gently, slightly open mouthed kisses against the other woman’s skin, moving down her collarbone, kissing both of her breasts, gently, enjoying the hitch in Jo’s breath when she brushed her lips against the other woman’s taut nipples. Gently, she licked at them, watching the other’s face as she arched up into the gentle mouth.
“Fuck, Jess…” Jo murmured, fingers tangling in the other’s hair.
“Mmm….” She murmured, licking her fingertips and rolling Jo’s nipples gently in her damp fingers, kissing her collarbone again, loving her soft, baby smooth skin.
“Jess… please…” the other’s fingers scrabbled at her shirt slightly, struggling with the buttons at their awkward angle, trying to tug the shirt, butter soft and smooth denim that had been washed until it barely felt of looked like the crisp blue it had once been, off of Jess’ shoulders. The little silver buttons, each stamped with a flower, like trying to add femininity to something that was the antithesis of girly, slipped out of the buttonholes, and she finally shoved the collar off of Jess’ shoulders. “Please. Take it off.”
“Yes’m,” she drawled, and sat back, tugging her own shirt off, and letting it drop over the side of the bed, before reaching back behind her to carefully unhook her bra, letting it follow the shirt.
Jo squirmed to sit up, cupping the other woman’s breasts, callused fingers brushing over the smooth, usually untouched skin, warmed by the confinement of the fabric, and bent to blow, gently, on them. Jess gasped and shivered, watching in fascination as the other woman licked her lips, then wet each nipple with her tongue. Little pink tongue darting out of her saliva glistened lips, Jo then blew on the other’s chest.
Jess keened, shivering at the sensation. Hot and cold, cold and hot… tingles were squirming up and down her spine in a most delicious way.
Laughing softly, she murmured, “Thought you might like that.”
“Mmm, I do,” Jess tugged Jo up again so that she could kiss the other woman properly, fingers looped in the other’s belt loops as she held her close, chest to chest, breast to breast, then popped the button on the other’s jeans, and shoved them down. “But I want something else even more, and that involves you being quite naked.”
“Do I at least get you naked in the deal?” Jo murmured, following the other’s example.
“Mmm, I think we can arrange that,” she breathed into the other’s mouth, squirming the denim down the other’s hips, trying to get the jeans off. “In fact, I think I’d even like that.”
“Then it’s a deal,” she laughed softly, though she pushed Jess’ boy cut underwear off along with her jeans, idly stroking her fingertips over the other’s smooth skin. “You shaved?”
“I do on a regular basis,” Jess laughed. “Gotta maintain.”
“Yeah… noticed it gets itchy,” Jo muttered, and when her lover laughed at the thought, she smacked Jess’ ass. “Now now, naughty little minx… you’re supposed to be the seductive hussy with legs that go into outer space, remember?”
“Mmm, I do remember something about that,” Jess grinned, and pushed Jo back into the pillows.
The younger woman landed with an ‘oof’, watching as the other dug in her jeans for a moment, understanding finally when Jess leaned up to put a quarter in the magic fingers machine. The bed began to vibrate a moment later, and she moaned softly, fingers reaching up to stroke gently over every inch of Jess’ skin exposed to her touch. “Mmm… I like where this is going already.”
“You’re going to love where it goes next even better, then,” Jess murmured, bending to kiss Jo’s stomach, then kissed the elastic waistband of her green cotton briefs. “Mmm. You look so edible like this.”
“You got that line from a porno,” Jo drawled, but her grin didn’t abate in the slightest.
“And?” she smirked slightly, stroking the other woman’s stomach. She mouthed softly at the other woman’s lips through the green cotton panties, grinning when Jo bucked. “Some of the best lines are from pornos.”
“Oh,” Jo murmured, bucking slightly. “This from a porno?”
“Mmm… maybe,” she drawled, licking at the cotton, which was growing swiftly damp. “Always kinda wanted to try it, anyway.”
“Mmm… wouldn’t… wouldn’t it be better if I was actually naked?” Jo murmured.
“Maybe.” Jess grinned, nipping gently at the other’s labia through the cotton, creating a rub of cotton on skin, and the other woman bucked, gasping. “But maybe the panties are just what we need to make it amazing. Because you’re making these beautiful little gasping sounds…”
“Less talking, more sexing,” she panted, fingers tangled in the other woman’s hair, pushing her down into her crotch again.
Snickering softly, Jess nipped at the other’s labia lips through the fabric again.
Jo groaned, and murmured, “Please…”
“Mmm, yes?” she purred, slipping her fingers into the hem of the other’s underwear, squirming them down her hips and then down her thighs. She shifted slightly, kissing the other’s soft skin, kissing her way down her hip, then her right leg, following the panties down. Finally, she tugged them right off of Jo, and playfully kissed the top of the other’s bare foot.
“Ew,” Jo giggled, amused. “You kissed my foot.”
“It’s a very nice foot,” Jess laughed, tickling the other’s toes, slightly. “All pretty and clean.”
“You don’t have a foot fetish, do you?” she smirked.
“Nope, but your feet would be the ones that would make me have one,” she snickered, still tickling gently. “You have very nice feet.”
“Mmm. Thank you. Now fuck me.”
Jess barked in laughter, and crawled up the other’s body, bending to kiss Jo gently, softly. It was a soft, gentle kiss, all kinds of gentle adoration and sweetness, until Jo gasped into it, spine arching. Smirking into the kiss, Jess nipped at the other woman’s lower lip, slowly sliding her index deeper into the other, stroking gently.
“Oh god, Jess…” the other keened, arching up harder, toes curling.
“Mmm, it’s only gonna get better, babe.”
----
There was a sharp knock on the door, and Jude yelped, burying her head under the pillows, wincing. The door opened anyway, and Sera stepped into the dark bedroom. Her shoes crunching down on several plastic pop bottles and clinking against glass, she marched across the room, and jerked the curtains open, late morning sunlight pouring into the room, scattering the shadows. The room was a complete mess, especially now that the light was spilling into it.
“Wake up, Jude,” Sera said sharply, kicking the bed frame. “Get out of the goddamn bed, and get up.”
Groaning softly, she slowly lifted the pillow that had been over her head, blinking blearily up at the other woman, eyes narrowed. “M’awake… what is it?”
The other hesitated, her self-righteous anger waylaid slightly. “Shit, are you all right? You look like you went on a bender with Drain-o.”
“I feel like I went on a bender with Drain-o,” Jude groaned softly, sitting up.
“Well, that was stupid, then, you fruitcake,” Sera kicked the bed again, grumpily, making the other woman yelp. “How did you know?!”
“How did I know what?”
“About Meg! About the demons! About - about Meg setting a trap for Sam and Dean!” she howled, kicking the bed again, clearly vindictively. “About it being in Chicago, about the shadow demons… about everything!”
“I don’t know anything!” she wailed, eyes squeezed tightly shut. “What are you talking about?!”
“Sing of Sweet Surrender!”
“Huh?”
“Your fanfiction, hello, the one you’ve been working on for months now?!” Sera crossed her arms, angrily, glowering at her. “The one based on the books that I publish, hello, you know! Seriously, did you kill all of your brain cells last night?!”
“Apparently,” she murmured, and sat up, rubbing at her forehead. “What’s wrong with my fanfiction now?”
She thwapped her in the head with a book, and Jude yelped, toppling. “The book!”
“Book?” she picked up the paperback, blinking at it. “Shadow. I - I don’t recognize this book.”
“You’ve read it, haven’t you? You snuck it out of my office, and you read it!”
“What?” Jude gaped at her best friend, flicking through the book. “Meg is in this - you published this! You published a book and I didn’t even read it! I’m the editor! Why is this book published when I haven’t even read it?!”
“I had someone else do it,” Sera muttered, arms crossed, watching her.
“What?!”
“You were getting obsessed! You were getting wrapped further and further into this stupid fanfiction you’re writing, and - and getting drunk on a regular basis and writing all fucking night! I was worried! I thought maybe if you didn’t read the newest book, not even to edit it, then you might be able to get some sleep, maybe the writing would calm down, but - you knew anyway!”
“Knew what anyway?!”
“Meg! Killed a college girl! Hung out in a bar waiting for Sam and Dean!”
Jude paled slightly, blinking at the pages of the book. “…that sounds like that chapter where Jess and Jo are in the bar and Meg says… there are bigger fish to fry…”
“You think?!”
“….that is so weird,” she murmured.
“Weird is an understatement! Weird is for little oddities, not for massive huge things like this! For god’s sake, Jude, now you’re writing about things in the books that haven’t been in the books yet, and - god, you wrote about Meg before she was even in the books, but I thought maybe that was a weird coincidence or something, but… this is more than just a weird coincidence! You copied plot! Only it wasn’t copied because - what did you think of the guest star in this book?” she asked, abruptly, trying to catch her still sleepy, hung over, headachy friend off guard.
“There’s a guest star in this book?” she blinked, blearily, flipping through it. “Who?”
“…their father,” she muttered, watching her.
Jude squealed, flipping immediately to the first page, all but writing in the bed. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, really, John has finally shown up?! Eeee, we’ve been waiting for John to show up since book one, and this is book sixteen, finally….”
“Oi!” Sera tried to snatch the book away from her.
“No way! Mine!” she squawked, alarmed, ducking back. “No way, my turn to read! You cheated me out of seeing in manuscript form, you gotta let me read it!”
She frowned, displeased. “…fine.”
“Don’t deny me this,” she pouted slightly, holding tightly onto the book. “It’s my favourite thing ever.”
“But it’s just not healthy…”
“Oi! You’re the publisher! You should be happy to have fanatical fans!”
“Oh, believe me, I am, but I don’t live with most of Carver Edlund’s maniacal fans,” she muttered, then sighed heavily, and sat on the edge of Jude’s bed. After all, as frustrated as she was, she was her best friend. And honestly, though the fanatical writing of the fanfiction kind of worried her, and scared her a lot, she kind of was the book’s biggest fan. That was why she published them. “Mostly… I’m kinda freaked out by the fact that you’re writing about things before they happen in the books.”
“Maybe I’m psychic,” Jude grinned, wriggling her eyebrows mischievously as she reached over to grab her glasses, sliding them on. “Me ‘n Carver Edlund, we got a psychic connection.”
Sera snorted. “There is no way you could link up with his genius.”
“Yeah, that’s true…” she sighed softly, wistfully.
“Mmm. He’s such a brilliant man,” she sighed. “A brilliant author… a little unrefined, but brilliant, and so clever…”
“It’s like outsider art!” Jude chirped.
“Dork.” Sera sighed, and leaned on the other’s shoulder, sighing softly.
Jude slyly flipped the page, reading quietly.
“You promise you didn’t steal the manuscript from my office?” she murmured, quietly.
“I wouldn’t do that to you, Sera,” she looked up, closing the book and setting it on the bed again, though definitely out of her friend’s reach. “You’re my best friend. I respect your privacy a hell of a lot more than that. If I really wanted to get one of the new manuscripts, I would trust you to hand them over, since you pay me to do that, and last I checked, I hadn’t been fired.”
She sighed. “I am never going to live that down, am I?”
“Nope. Never. I’m pissed about that. There needs to be continuity in these books, and that means continuity in the editing, too.” Reaching over to scoop up the novel, Jude brandished it at her. “I’ve read three pages now, and I’ve already found a typo.”
“What?! No way!” she grabbed at the book.
“No!” Jude tugged Shadows away from her again, shaking her head quickly. “I’ll show it to you after I’m done reading it, thank you very much. I want to know what happens.”
She sighed, heavily, flopping back on the bed. Nose crinkling, she tugged a crumpled chip bag out from under her back, and dropped it sort of delicately on the floor. “Fine. Read the book, enjoy the book… it’s really good, actually. I love the twist, at the end, when - “
“Ah! No spoiling!” she squealed, almost tackling her best friend. “None of that!”
Sera snorted. “You really haven’t read it, have you?”
“No, of course not. I write about Jess, and apparently her girlfriend, not about…” Jude hesitated suddenly, considering something. “Wait, you didn’t give me the book manuscript… I didn’t give you the last few chapters of my fanfic, either, because you were complaining about them! How the hell did you get a hold of my story?!”
“You put it on your livejournal, Jude. We’ve had this conversation already, like a month ago. You put it on your stupid livejournal with your stupid name with the ‘exes’ and your livejournal is on my friend’s list, dork.”
“Oh, good point,” she flushed, scratching at the back of her neck. “…I like my username.”
“There are exes in it.”
“Other people wanted to use lines from ‘Hey Jude’, too, okay?” She groaned softly, running her hand through her hair. “I’m not the only person to want to use Beatles lyrics in my username, and it’s a popular song.”
“Yeah… I know, I know,” Sera snickered, ruffling Jude’s hair. “Your own damn fault for being named Jude, I guess. Well. Judith. Jude. Whatever. Also, for the love of god, can you take a shower?”
“Why?” Jude blinked.
“Because you’re a greasy mess!” she snorted, and stood. “So shower. And read.”
“Thanks,” Jude grinned, settling back in the bed, tugging her glasses back off again, because she read her novels without glasses, being so far sighted that books being close up meant she could see things close up easier without them.
“And… lay off the fanfiction a little?” Sera murmured, pausing in the doorway.
She hesitated. “…I’ll see what I can do.”
She nodded, and slipped out of the room, knowing full well that her best friend had just lied to her, and that the writing would continue.
----
I must go on standing
You can’t break that which isn’t yours
I must go on standing
I’m not my own, it’s not my choice
“Wake up!”
Jess bolted up, gasping, chest heaving as she gaped at Jo, eyes wide and confused. “Wh-what?”
“You were screaming,” she said softly, cupping the other’s jaw, considering her. “Dreaming about hell again?”
“No… no.” shifting up, she rubbed her forehead, confused. Trying to remember what she had been dreaming about was sort of confusing and bewildered, but she knew that she had not been dreaming about hell. She remembered her dreams of hell, she always did, because they were not dreams but relived memories, drilled into her brain. It took a few moments of thinking until a flash of memory slipped into her consciousness again, and Jess gagged.
“Woah!” Jo scrambled to rub the other woman’s back, trying to soothe her. “What happened?!”
Staggering out of the back seat of the car, where they had both been crunched into the narrow space, Jess bent double over the rough scrub brush, and puked everything that was left from last night’s take out burgers.
Nose crinkling, the other woman slipped out of the backseat of the car, and padded over to stand beside the sick woman, stroking her back.
Fairly sobbing with pain and misery, Jess bent, bracing her forearms on her thighs, biting hard into her lower lip. Her stomach still churned, struggling to upset again, but she fought to hold the reaction down, to be calm and still. The last thing she wanted was to get ill again - she had never really been much of a fan anyway, and out here in the fields at the edge of a beach, it wasn’t even like they really had anywhere to go after here in order for her to clean up, either. This was it.
“I take it you remembered,” Jo murmured.
Jess remembered. She remembered dreaming that she was back in her apartment, the one she had shared with Sam. She had been lying on their big bed, warm and comfortable, stretched out amongst the blankets as though she’d been planning a decadent weekend of sleeping. And then, within the dream, she had noticed that it seemed to be raining inside, which made no sense, so she looked up. She was expecting to see clouds and rain, which happened sometimes in dreams, which was strange enough, but there was a ceiling still. And on the ceiling was Joanna Beth Harvelle, pinned to the ceiling, looking down at her in horror as the ‘rain’ sprinkled down on her, actually the blood from her lover’s belly.
And that had been when Jess had screamed.
“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked softly.
Jess winced. “No. No, absolutely not. Sorry, I don’t want to, I - I really don’t want to talk about it. I’m sorry.”
“Okay,” she murmured, flushed.
“It’s not because…” she stood slowly, wiping at her mouth, wincing slightly. “It’s not because of you, Jo. You know I will do whatever you want. I just… this is something I don’t really want to rehash.”
“Yeah, I know.” She murmured. “I get it.”
Jess groaned, tugging the other slightly closer, holding the other woman against her chest, gently, hugging her against her chest. “M’sorry, babe.”
“It’s okay.” She murmured, arms loosely looped around the base of the other’s spine, holding her.
“We’re dysfunctionally awesome,” Jess murmured, amused.
She snorted.
“So, um… sorry about the screaming thing.”
“Hey, could be worse,” she drawled, slowly stroking the other’s lower back, under the bottom hem of her tank top, stroking the skin. “You could compulsively try to eat people’s skin in your sleep or something.”
Jess barked in laughter, shaking her head. “No, no skin munching instincts.”
“Good.” Jo kissed the other’s jaw.
“Mmm. So now that the drama after school special is over…” she stretched slightly, and straightened up, still wrapped in the other woman’s arms. “I hear there’s a bridge we’re supposed to be investigating.”
“Right, the crybaby bridge,” Jo murmured, softly, shaking her head.
Jess kissed the other woman’s brow, then slipped out of the other’s arms, heading to the car again, feeling sort of hollow and cold.
Jo sighed, and followed, quietly.
She knew that she was distancing herself from her lover, and she probably shouldn’t, but she almost couldn’t help it. Every fibre of Jess’ being wanted to throw herself back into her lover’s arms, maybe crawl back into the warm little cave that they’d set up in the backseat with a car blanket and a couple jackets, and go back to sleep with Jo wrapped in her arms. That was all she wanted.
But every time she looked up and spotted the other blond, a flash of the nightmare flicked behind her eyes, and she couldn’t stop the unbidden images.
Keening, Jess closed her eyes tightly. Finally, she dug into the trunk, digging in her duffel bag, finding a fresh pair of jeans and a plaid shirt. She glanced to make sure there was no road or other cars close by, then tugged off what she was currently wearing, and tugged on her clothes, getting ready to go. Maybe killing something, or slaying something, that would make her feel better.
“Hungry?”
Jess jumped, gasping in surprise. She hadn’t expected her lover to be standing right beside the trunk, half leaning under the trunk lid with her. She offered the crinkly package of oreo cookies, and sighing softly, Jess took several of the cookies out of the package, crunching on one of them. “Thanks.”
“Mmhmm,” she nodded, considering her.
“Okay, seriously, feeling like a bug right now…” Jess frowned slightly. “You’re staring me down.”
“I’m thinking,” Jo smirked, then turned to head back to the front of the car again.
She sighed softly, shaking her head, then followed, still crunching. The flavor of the cookies was slightly tainted by the puke flavor, but at least they were slowly starting to wash it out. Slipping into the driver’s seat, she murmured, “Ready to go?”
“Mmmhmm. Let’s go.”
Part Twelve