'The Limit' - Chapter Fourteen
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The pounding on the door wouldn’t stop. He’d yelled for whoever it was to go away, but apparently they didn’t care what he wanted. Maybe no one did anymore.
“God, do you know what ‘go away’ means?” he yells as he stomps angrily down the stairs, “I don’t want to buy your encyclopedias, and I’m sure as hell not going to find your religion this morning, either!”
He stops mid-tirade when he throws the door open to find Haley there. She’s glaring at him, her arms crossed over her chest, foot tapping, the whole deal. He just stares, open-mouthed, at her, unable to formulate any sort of appropriate response. Since the meeting for service club blew up in his face, he’s avoided her. Stopped going to tutoring, ignored her calls, ignored the notes she slipped in his locker, stayed away from her house.
It’s only been a week, but it has felt like a lifetime to him. He’s been extra surly to everyone at school, except Lucas and his crew, who he has avoided at all costs. It seems like one part of that doesn’t want to be avoided, though.
Tiredly, he runs his hand over his face, trying to wake up. And she just stares at his bare chest, trying not to drool. That would totally amuse him if it didn’t totally counter what he was trying to accomplish here.
“You shouldn’t be here,” he tells her, his voice gruff with emotion, “I gave you your out, Haley. You don’t have to deal with me anymore.”
“Deal with you?” she repeats, her eyes widening with her incredulity, “I can’t believe you even said that, you jerk. Like it wasn’t bad enough that you’ve avoided me, skipped tutoring, and refused to talk to me, but now you’re going to act like the martyr? That’s completely whack, Nathan Scott, and you know it.”
He stares at her, wilting a little in the intensity of her regard. Maybe it was stupid to decide to avoid her. When he couldn’t come up with a way to spare her when he took down Lucas, he decided he’d just cut her out altogether. He’d been miserable ever since, and everyone around him was paying the price for it.
“You aren’t going to say anything?” she shouts, not even wondering if his parents were there or anything, “God, you know what? Maybe I was right about you in the first place, maybe you are just a pathetic jerk.” Her eyes fill with tears, and he has to clench his hands into fists at his sides to keep from reaching for her. “I thought you were different than everyone thinks. That you were better. I was so wrong, I guess.”
“Why would you still want to bother with me?” he asks, his voice needier than he ever remembers it sounding, “Lucas said it, right? I’m not worth it.”
She gives him an odd look, pushing past him into the house. Her eyes keep dipping down to his chest before darting back up to eye level. “Since when do you care what he says?” she asks quietly, going upstairs, intent on getting to his room.
He follows after her, just like she intended, and he wonders when he turned into the lost puppy dog. “What are you doing?” he asks, calling after her as he takes the stairs two at a time to catch up.
She shrugs. “I like your room best.”
“It’s a teenage boy’s room,” he laughs, the first genuine laugh he’s had since the last time he was alone with her, “There’s a few posters of half-naked women.”
“It’s your room,” she shrugs again, looking at the carpet. Ah, there’s that vulnerability that he likes so much in her. He likes the bravado, too, but the vulnerability is such a turn-on to him.
“Why’d you come?” he asks quietly, watching her carefully.
“You just started avoiding me,” she points out, “And maybe I shouldn’t care, but I do. You owe me an explanation, at least. I risked a lot for you, a lot of me, a lot of my life, and you can’t just brush me off like this. It’s not fair, Nathan.”
“Life isn’t fair, Haley,” he quickly returns, but the words are hollow, and he just sits down on the bed. She sits down next to him, not quite touching, but close. “It was hard,” he goes on to admit, “To be reminded, by Lucas, of all people, that just burned me. And I’ll admit it, I’m not used to not having things fall my way, you know?”
She nods, not sure what that has to do with him giving her the cold shoulder, but getting a little of where he is coming from. “I don’t know what that has to do with me, though.”
“You,” he sighs, giving her a small smile, “You’re Lucas’s, you know? He gets to be your friend in public, and give you hugs and whatever, and talk to you, and you’re not going to freak about it. But if I even talked to you in a hallway at school, what would you do? You’d freak on me because no one can ever know that we’re friends.”
Reaching out, she puts her hand on his thigh, and he instantly hardens at the touch. He has this hyperawareness of her, and every touch from her sends shockwaves through his body. Without letting himself think about it, he turns towards her, gripping her face in his hands as he presses his lips to hers.
She gives in to his caresses, her lips parting under his. Her arms come up around his neck, holding tight. She is the one to break the kiss, though, pulling back and burying her face in his neck.
“I was jealous,” Nathan says aloud, “And then I was really, really pissed at myself for being jealous of him, because it wasn’t supposed to be that way.”
Her grip on him tightens, and she sighs into his hair. “You think I don’t get jealous of Taylor? Hell, Nathan, I’ve never been more jealous of anyone than I was of her when I found out that she - that she and you, you know.”
“That was a long time ago, and it was nothing,” he’s quick to assure her, “It was nothing. It meant nothing to me, she means nothing to me!”
“I know, Nathan,” she soothes, her hand rubbing over his neck, “But it doesn’t mean that I didn’t feel it, you know? It isn’t exactly a rational emotion.”
He nods against her shoulder. “I guess not,” he sighs, his arms tightening to pull her onto his lap, “What are you doing here? You should’ve been glad to be rid of me.”
She leans back to look him in the eye. She smiles wryly at him. “Funny thing happened on the way to getting you to back off Lucas - I started to like you a little bit.”
“Just a little?” he teases back, and she’s pleased to feel some of the tension seep out of his body, along with the return of his slightly cockier than the next guy attitude, “Because I like you a little, too.”
“Maybe more than a little,” she shrugs, playing coy.
“Me, too,” he nods solemnly, leaning forward to kiss her softly again. He cups her face gently in his hands, drawing her further and further into him. Her arms slide down his bare back so that her hands can rest on his hips. He lies back, stretching out on the bed. She stays with him, coming down to rest atop him. His fingers toy with the hem of her shirt, and reluctantly, he pulls his mouth away from hers. “Is this okay?” he asks as he rolls them over.
She knows what he’s asking of her, and she’s sure that if her mind wasn’t completely closed down at the moment, she’d have a thousand reasons why not. But for the moment, all she can breathe, feel, taste, smell, hear is him, and she doesn’t care about principles or antiquated ideas about waiting for marriage. None of that matters at all.
So she nods, opening her eyes to watch his face as he slides his hand under her shirt for the first time. He slides partially off of her, one of his heavy legs anchored across hers. As if she would try to run now. He props himself up on his elbow, his eyes intent on her face as he inches his hand under, just barely grazing her skin with his fingertips.
She sighs, tossing her head to get her hair over her shoulder, getting it out of her line of sight. She just…doesn’t want to miss any of this, whatever this is. His touch is so soft, so reverent that she just suddenly gets why Taylor and Viv were both so boy crazy. Still are, in Taylor’s case. But this, this feels so good, and he is staring at her so intently that she’s sure she could drown in this moment.
When he leans down to kiss her again, she’s sure she’ll combust. His fingers drift ever higher, grazing the bottom of her bra-covered breasts. It’s just so much, so fast, and the thought of stopping doesn’t even enter her mind. But when he rolls off of her, groaning as he puts a little space between them, she’s grateful that he would know her enough to pull back when maybe she didn’t realize she needed to.
“I’m sorry,” she sighs, her head falling to the side to look at him, “I’m not - I’d never figured I’d be that girl, that tease girl that everyone hates.”
He chuckles for a second, and then starts cracking up. “Haley, you aren’t a tease, trust me. Not on purpose, anyway. So don’t think that you’re like the girls that you’re picturing,” he grins, rolling back onto his side to face her. “I want to,” he says bluntly, “Right now, I want to take your clothes off, all of them, and do things to you that you’ve never even heard of. But I know you aren’t there yet, and I - I can be okay with it.”
“Really?” she asks in a voice laden with insecurity and self-doubt. And reality. It’s not like she lives under a rock - she knows exactly what kind of rumors swirl through the halls of Tree Hill High about Nathan Scott; she’d even repeated a few of them in disgust to Luke last year. She wasn’t so naïve as to think there wasn’t truth in any of them.
He moves again, this time so that one of his legs is resting between her own, and she can actually feel how much he wants her. Her eyes widen in surprise and shock and lust, and her heart stops for a few seconds when his hand comes up to fully cup her breast. The protective layer of bra and shirt so don’t even matter.
He leans his head down so that his mouth is close by her ear. “You feel that, right? You feel how much I want you, and believe me, no one else is doing this for me, Hay. It’s just you, and I can wait. I will wait.” He lifts his head to grin at her. “If you want to put me out of my misery and let me stop waiting, I wouldn’t complain, though,” he teases with a wink.
Her eyes widen with desire, her lips parting on a gasp. And as good as she feels, and she feels really good, thanks to him, a part of her feels guilty because the strain of holding himself back is evident on his face. She gives him a quick kiss on the corner of his mouth, and then moves out from under him. “I’m sorry that I’m not ready. I’m sure you’re not really used to waiting,” she sighs, sitting up against the headboard, pulling her knees against her chest.
He sits up next to her. “Maybe no one was ever worth waiting for before,” he says, grinning when her eyes widen comically. Sighing, he looks over at her. “If I promise to not ignore you again, will you wait for me to go take a cold shower?”
“Why would you do that?” she wonders, her nose crinkling, “It’s already kind of cold in here, Nathan. You should turn the thermostat up a degree or two.” She pauses, blinking as recognition dawns. “Oh. Um, I can just go. It probably isn’t really all that polite to barge into someone’s house this early on the weekend, huh? Yeah, so I’ll go, and you can…you know, and um, yeah. Tutoring, Monday, the dock. Okay.”
Laughing, he puts a hand on her shoulder, keeping her in place. “Stay, Haley. I’ll be fast, and then maybe we can go somewhere.”
“I can’t. I, um, have plans. Besides, where would we go?” she sighs, and he knows who the plans are with, “We still can’t just show up anywhere in town. There’s always someone we’d know around. You know, this is kind of frustrating.”
“Tell me about it,” he sighs, the double meaning apparent to both of them, and Haley blushes, “Hay, I didn’t mean it like that.”
She nods rapidly. “You know, maybe this was enough for today, because it has really been a lot. But um, tomorrow is Sunday. It’s January. Maybe we could drive out to the dunes. No one would be there.”
He smiles, nodding. “Yeah, let’s try that. I could pick you up around 10?”
“Okay,” she nods, her legs swinging off the bed, “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
“Yeah, you definitely will,” he agrees, smiling as sincerely as he’s capable of at her. In all fairness, he’s sure he’s getting better at that, at least with her. It’s kind of weird, actually.
Her phone rings, and she pulls it out of her pocket, glancing at the caller ID. “Um, do you mind?” she asks quietly, it paining her to do so because she knows he does, and truth is, she does, too.
“No, go ahead,” he nods, sighing as he leans his head back enough that he can fix his gaze on the ceiling.
“Hey Luke,” she answers, turning away, unable to look at Nathan while she talks to Luke, “What’s up?” She listens to him, and Nathan can tell just by the change in her posture that The Bastard is saying something she doesn’t like. “Okay, Luke? You know I’m happy for you, that you have Peyt and all that, but did you realize this is about the sixth time you’ve brushed me off in the last month? It kind of sucks.”
She turns around, a frown marring her pretty face, and Nathan sighs, ready to pound on Lucas for disappointing her again. What an ass.
“Fine, Luke, we’ll do it some other day,” she agrees, “No, not tomorrow, I already have plans.” Nathan smiles at her, a little surprised that she didn’t agree to go with him anyway. “It’s a family thing, Luke.” Running her hand through her hair, she shakes her head. “Trust me, you don’t want to be around for this one. Mom is getting her pictures back from when the baby was born. Dad thinks she got some really gross ones.” She laughs at his response to that. “Yeah, I didn’t think so. Look, I’ll talk to you later, okay? Bye.”
Nathan doesn’t say anything, just waits for her to quit pacing and let him in a little. For all that they’ve talked, he thinks that he’s let her in a lot further than she’s done. Or maybe his ‘in’ just gets darker a lot faster than hers does.
“Well, um, we could go today, if you wanted,” she smiles, trying to pretend like it doesn’t bother her. Does she really think he can’t see through that façade? God, he knows her so much better than that now. Maybe he doesn’t know everything, but he knows she’s not okay with Lucas blowing her off, and he’s not okay with it either.
“Want me to kick his ass?” Nathan asks hopefully, winking to let her know it’s a joke, “I think that would be fun for everyone.”
“Except maybe him,” Haley giggles, her arms wrapping around her middle as she shivers a little, “He might not like it so much.”
“You okay?” he asks, watching her with a little concern, yet another foreign feeling that Haley James is eliciting in him.
She shrugs, sitting down at the very edge of the foot of the bed. “Yeah, I am. It’s not a big deal, right? I mean, I’m probably being too hard line or something. This is what happens when we grow up, right? Your friends get girlfriends or boyfriends, and then suddenly, that’s who they want to spend all their time with. It’s life, right? So I shouldn’t be such a big baby about it, right?”
He shrugs, having no more insight to the situation than she does. “I don’t know the etiquette, Hay. I don’t have any real friends, right?”
She looks over her shoulder at him, giving him a small smile. “I thought this was my pity party, not yours.”
He gives her a mock wounded look, moving down so that he is lying facing the foot of the bed, and he can lean his head against her thigh. “You won’t share with me? Come on, pity is so much better when you can share it, right?”
“Am I not your friend?” she asks out of the blue, then blushes, her hands fidgeting in her lap, “I mean, you said you don’t have any friends, but I was kinda thinking that maybe we were friends, but if not, okay, I can understand. It’d be kind of weird, I guess, with Luke and Peyton and all. I get it, I really do.”
“Are you finished?” he asks her when the rambling stops, “You’re not my friend, Hay. You’re…I don’t know how to define what you are to me, except more. You’re just more than any label I could put on what you are to me. I - I guess that sounds stupid and probably doesn’t make sense, you really are more than anything to me.”
She stops fidgeting, one of her hands moving to brush over his hair. “Thank you,” she whispers, sliding off the end of the bed and turning so that she can face him, “We are friends, Nathan. But I like that we’re more, too.”
She leans forward, again kissing him. He likes that she’ll initiate it, likes that she wants to kiss him, to touch him. It’s just a relief that he isn’t always the one pushing, testing the boundaries. He’s glad that she feels safe enough to start things with him.
“I should go,” she sighs, “My mom really is getting pictures back today, and maybe I can see them before Taylor puts her skanky hands all over them. They aren’t of anything gross, just of Vivvy and the baby. And probably her husband. I don’t know. Want to come over?”
He wanted to come alright, but not over. Besides, he was pretty sure Dan would be home soon, and they were supposed have some sort of training session with a guy that Dan hired, and then watch tape. And he was pretty sure he wouldn’t like the consequences if he blew that off. It was probably for the better that Haley told him tomorrow for their outing.
“Nah, I should stay here,” he sighs, brushing his lips over hers again, “Dad has a few things planned for me this afternoon.”
Concern for him flits across her face, and that might be one of the sexiest things he’s ever seen. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? What’s he going to make you do this time?”
“Some new training regiment,” he explains, kissing the tip of her nose, drawing a giggle, “He’s even hired some dude who was a star in college hoops before blowing out his knee to work with me on fundamentals. That’s kind of cool. There’re always aspects of the game to improve.”
She crinkles her nose at him. “Okay, save the touchdown talk for Tim.”
“There aren’t touchdowns in basketball, Hay,” he reminds her, kissing her again, “Um, but you should get going. I still have to, ah, hop in the shower.”
A bright blush covers her cheeks, and he grins widely at her. That is one of the most fun things about her, the way she blushes at the drop of a hat. Or a word. “Okay,” she nods, standing up quickly, “I’ll see you tomorrow, Nathan. If things - well, if you need me tonight, just call or come over.”
He nods, a little touched that she’d think of him like that. No one has ever blinked at the way Dan treats him, at least not enough to do anything about it or say anything to him, so for her to get it, for it to matter her, that’s something. It’s a lot of things to him.
“Thanks,” he murmurs, watching as she walks to his door, “I’ll pick you up tomorrow. Don’t forget.”
”I won’t,” she promises, giving him another shy smile. He can tell by the hint of blush on her cheeks when she looks back at the bed, remembering where he’d touched her, how she’d squirmed against him. How his bare skin felt under her hands.
She leaves, and he stays on the bed for a minute, wondering how the hell he got here. In a constant state of want over a girl he wasn’t sure when he’d have. No relief in sight.
And he didn’t even care.
~*~
“Nathan, you’ve got to be quicker than that!” Raoul, his new trainer, tells him in his heavily accented English, “Your feet, they are too slow!”
“I’m trying,” Nathan grunts out, pinpricks of light starting to mar his vision, “Can we take a break? We’ve been at this for two hours!”
Raoul shakes his head, motioning for Nathan to continue. “Your father is not paying me to let you slack off, Nathan. Get going, get going!”
Groaning and wheezing, Nathan keeps going. Because if he doesn’t, Dan will hear about it. It was just like his father to make sure that he could control pretty much all aspects of Nathan’s life. Now he had a way to monitor Nathan when he wasn’t around, which was already starting to freak Nathan out a little bit.
When he’s too winded and tired to keep up with intense workout, Nathan lets himself fall to the hard floor of the gym, not looking up when he sees Raoul’s sneakers in front of him.
“Get up!” Raoul barks at him, “You are not this weak! I will not let you be this weak. You do not get to be great player without hard work! Do you not understand that? Your father says you do.”
“Yeah,” Nathan wheezes, “Well, my father doesn’t know jack shit about me, and you can tell him I said so, too.”
Raoul glares down at him, nudging him with his leg. “Get up, boy. Your father is not paying me for you to lie here. You nap when you get home!”
“I’m not doing this!” Nathan yells, or half yells, “I’m not his goddamn puppet! How am I supposed to be some great player when I’m too tired to run up and down the court during the game? You guys are assholes!”
“Scott comma Nathan,” Whitey shouts from the end of the gym. Nathan’s head snaps up, but when he sees that the rest of the team is standing there, including Lucas, he wishes he hadn’t looked, “Hit the showers. I’ll deal with this.”
Stifling another groan, Nathan pushes himself to his feet, each and every muscle in his body aching like crazy. He keeps his head lowered as he stalks past his teammates, not caring to see the looks on any of their faces, particularly Lucas’s. By the time he gets himself dressed in his school clothes, Whitey is coming into the locker room, sitting down on the bench across from him.
“So this is your daddy’s latest plan, huh? Run you into the ground?” Whitey shakes his head. “I don’t know about him, but then again, I never could figure him out. Are you okay? Physically?”
“I can play,” Nathan nods, not looking up, “I would’ve practiced, Coach.”
Whitey nods, his fingers stroking over his chin. “I know, son. Sometimes, it is best if we don’t, though, and I think this is one of them.”
“I can’t believe everyone saw that,” Nathan grumbles, shaking his head, “Even when he isn’t around, he finds ways to screw things up for me.”
“Forget them,” Whitey counsels, “Most of ‘em won’t even remember what happened in there tomorrow.”
“But one will,” Nathan sighs, getting to the crux of the matter, “He’ll remember and he’ll lord it over me forever.”
”Like you would’ve done to him?” Whitey asks knowingly, “You know, Nathan, your brother, he isn’t a bad guy. In fact, he’s a pretty good kid.”
“I wouldn’t know,” Nathan states flatly, “And I don’t really care, either. He’s virtually nothing to me.”
Whitey raises his eyebrows, smirking in amusement. “If he’s nothing to you, then why are you so set in getting him off this team?”
“I haven’t done anything to him in months,” Nathan protests, “I ignore him, he ignores me. What’s the big deal?”
“The big deal is that I need the two of you to start acting like teammates. Now, I don’t give a good gosh darn if you ever act like brothers, and I won’t be holding my breath, but you do need to act like teammates. Pass him the ball once in awhile. I’ve watched you, Nathan, and nine times out of ten, in practices and games, you’ll turn the ball over rather than pass to him! That stops now.”
Nathan looks up, frowning. “You’re asking for a miracle, Coach.”
“No, I’m not. I’m demanding it. And if I don’t get, I’ll make personnel changes, Nathan. Things won’t continue like this, not on my watch.”
“Whatever,” Nathan mutters angrily, standing up and grabbing his gym bag, “What else can I give him? My position? Oh, he has that already. Hmm, my girlfriend? Yeah, he got her, too. What else can I possibly give away, Coach?”
“This isn’t about giving something away,” Whitey tries to make him see, “This is about doing what is best for the team! There’s a huge difference. And I didn’t think you liked Chicken L - I mean, Miss Sawyer anymore. You’re still sore about that?”
“I didn’t mean her - oh, I didn’t mean anything,” Nathan stammers, turning and stalking out of the locker room.
As he’s leaving the school through the front doors, having avoided his teammates in the gym, he spots his father storming through the parking lot, obviously having been summoned by Raoul. He spots Nathan, and makes his way over to him.
“What the hell is wrong with you, Nathan?” he rages, grabbing his younger son by the collar of his shirt and dragging him through the parking lot, “I am spending thousands of dollars a month to have Raoul train you, and you’re throwing it away? Have you sustained brain damage that I wasn’t aware of lately?”
“He pushed too hard, Dad, I wouldn’t have had anything left for the game,” Nathan sighs, trying to wrest himself out of his father’s grip, “I needed to save something.”
“No, no you don’t. You’re past the point of conserving or whatever bullshit I’m sure Whitey, that old idiot, is letting you believe. You’re stinking up the court out there, Nathan! That doesn’t fly in this family!” Dan reminds him, “Besides, it’s only been three days! This training will get your endurance up, and then you won’t be on the floor crying for your mama.”
Nathan finally succeeds in breaking out of his father’s grip. “God, Dad! You want me to get my position back, and then you want me to get your other son off the team, and now you want me too tired to even play? I don’t get you at all.”
“No one ever said you had to get me, or understand. You’re seventeen. You just do what you’re told, Nathan.”
“Or what?” Nathan asks tiredly.
“Or you don’t want to know,” Dan snaps, “But you’d be sorry. Exceptionally sorry, Nathan.”
“You’re threatening me?” Nathan asks, incredulous that it has gone this low, “How could you threaten me?”
Dan smirks nastily at him, shaking his head. “Don’t you get it, Nathan? This is going to get done, one way or the other. And you can make it easy, and cooperate with me and Raoul, or you can make it hard. The point is, you will have this training. Or you just won’t play anymore. Period.”
Nathan gapes at him, his mouth dropping open in shock. “You’d pull me from the team? You can’t do that, Dad!”
“I’m your parent,” Dan explains condescendingly, “I can pretty much do whatever I want to, and you know that as well as I do.”
“Mom wouldn’t go for it!” Nathan exclaims, grasping at straws.
“Your mother probably doesn’t even know what grade you’re in now,” Dan snips, rubbing salt in one of Nathan’s more open wounds, “She won’t care if you’re not playing basketball anymore!”
“It isn’t fair,” Nathan tries, desperate to get Dan off his back, “Come on, I’m having a great season! Whitey says I’m the best player my age he’s ever coached! Doesn’t that count for something?”
“Whitey’s lying to you, Nathan,” Dan frowns, patting him on the shoulder, “I’m not saying that you couldn’t be, but you’ve got a lot of work to do. With me, and with Raoul.”
“Gee, father son bonding time. And some guy Daddy hired and son bonding time. How nice,” Nathan snarks, shaking off Dan’s hand, “You know, once upon a time, basketball was actually fun.”
“It isn’t supposed to be fun,” Dan laughs rudely, “It’s a sport, and the point is to win. And you don’t win unless you’re the best. And you will be the best, Nathan. It’s just that simple.”
Defeated, Nathan nods. “Yeah, fine. Whatever, we’ll do it your way. Since that’s obviously the only way that there is, right, Dad?”
Dan smirks knowingly. “In this case? Yes, it is.”
There’s nothing else to say, so Nathan turns and walks back into the school, letting Dan get the last word. That’s just about Dan’s favorite pastime, so he knows he won’t get called back. That’s the saving grace of this godawful afternoon, knowing he won’t have to see his father until he gets home. And if he has any say in it, that won’t be for awhile.
Knowing that Lucas will be in practice a bit longer, he goes to the tutoring center. That morning, Haley had told him that she and Luke were going to hang out that night, play some golf thing on the roof of his mother’s café. But now he’s got an in to get her to change those plans, and he is not afraid to use it.
He looks through the small window on the door, tapping on it when he sees that she’s alone in there. She blinks in surprise to see him, and then a panicked look crosses her face. She hurries over to the door, letting him in. Ignoring the screaming muscles in his body, he bends down, picking her up as he hugs her to him. She’s stiff with surprise for a few seconds, but then she melts against him, wrapping her arms around him.
Setting her down, he buries his face in her neck. “Are you okay?” she asks quietly, and then, “Nathan, Luke is coming here to meet me after practice.”
He sighs, nodding. “Yeah, he should be there for another twenty minutes or so. Whitey sent me home.”
“Why, what happened?” Haley asks in concern, pulling back to look at him. “You didn’t fight, did you? You don’t look like it.”
He shakes his head, dropping into one of the chairs. “No, Raoul and I had a session before practice started. It’s just so hard, Hay. He has me running and moving so much and so fast that I’ll start seeing spots and feeling like I’ll pass out. I just can’t do it.”
She sits down on the chair next to his, her hand coming up to massage his neck. “I’m sorry, Nathan. I know how much it’s taking out of you, and it’s only been a couple of days.”
“It gets worse. Whitey threatened to bench me, and then Dad showed up, pissed that we’d ended the training session early.”
“Oh, Nathan,” she sighs, her forehead resting against his upper arm.
“I don’t know how I’m going to keep it all going,” he admits truthfully, sighing with a touch of relief when she wraps her arms around him, “I just want it to be done.”
She doesn’t know what he means, and he’s not going to elaborate her to the truth: that he wants Lucas off the team. Once that happens, he knows Dan is going to ease up on him, at least a little. And then his problems with Whitey will cease and desist, and everything will go back to normal. He just has to step up his plan to get rid of Lucas. Hell, he has to make a plan that goes beyond seducing Haley, and really stick it to Lucas.
“Hang in there, Nathan. I’m here if you need anything.”
He gives her his best pathetic smile, feeling a little guilty about manipulating her now, but pushing that aside. “Nah, you do enough for me as it is. I think I’m just going to go home. I don’t feel like being anywhere public, and since the guys on the team all witnessed the scene with Raoul, they’re all out of the question.”
She chews on her lower lip, and he knows that she’s already considering how to cancel on Lucas to spend time with him. Leaning forward, he brushes his lips across her cheek to her ear, inhaling the fresh, clean smell of her hair.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, pretty girl. Provided my dad doesn’t kill me in my sleep, or with his protein shake in the morning,” he morbidly jokes, driving it home that his home is the last place he should be right now. He gets up and walks to the door.
“No!” she exclaims, jumping to her feet. She comes over to him, grabbing his hands. “No, don’t go home.”
“You have a better idea?” he asks in feigned surprise.
Again gnawing on her lower lip, she nods hesitantly. “Come home with me,” she offers, and he fights to contain his grin, “Taylor is gone, visiting her sorority, and my parents are always glad to see you.”
He frowns, pretending to think. “But don’t you have plans? Hay, I wouldn’t ask you to break your plans for me. I’m not that selfish.”
“You’re not asking,” she shrugs, looking conflicted, “I’m offering. And I’ll feel like a total jerk for bailing on him when I got so upset about him bailing on me, so I’m going to count on you to make me feel better.”
He grins hugely, almost forgetting the pain and stress of the day. “Haley James, are you flirting with me?”
She laughs, and he, acting like a total girl, melts a little. “Maybe. Just maybe I am. Would that be such a bad thing?”
He shakes his head slowly, his hands dropping hers to rest on her hips. He pulls her flush against him. “It wouldn’t be a bad thing at all.”
“Well, good then,” she smiles, her lips parting when he brings his down to them, “Very good.”
He waits in his truck for her, grinning when she comes out ten minutes later. “I thought you’d be longer,” he says as she climbs in, “None of the guys have come out.”
She shrugs. “I stood at the door until Whitey got sick of me being there, and then I told Luke I had to cancel.”
“Was he mad?” Nathan asks carefully, trying to keep the glee out of his voice. Because Lucas being mad? Would totally make him gleeful. Even the thought of it does.
“No, not really,” she laughs wryly, “He seemed tired, and I’m sure he’s hoping that Peyton is free tonight. His heart? Was not too broken.”
“Mine would’ve been,” he flirts with her, winking as he starts the truck.
“You are such a flirt!” she accuses, “Sometimes I think that it is your first nature.”
“What’s my second nature then?” he asks, glancing over at her as he pulls out of the parking lot.
“Don’t ask questions that you don’t want the answers to,” she admonishes him in a teasing voice, but the words still hit him.
“What does that mean?” he asks tensely.
She gives him an exasperated look, rolling her eyes. “God, don’t be so sensitive, Nathan. It wasn’t a dig at you, believe me. I was teasing. You’ve been over to my house enough to know what that looks like.”
Unrepentant, he shrugs. “Yeah, okay,” he sighs, “I guess I’m being a little sensitive.”
“And that’s okay,” she offers, “Sometimes. All the time? That’d be totally annoying, but sometimes, it’s cool.”
She smiles at him, and he knows he’s off the hook. “Yeah, you know, the teasing thing was never big in my house,” he shrugs, “Unless you count my dad calling me a lazy punk teasing.”
Her face falls a little, and he knows that he’s just making himself seem more pathetic in her eyes. But if this is his way in with her, the one that will get him in the furthest, then he’ll use it. He wants to be in her bed, in her life in every way that counts, and he wants to be there soon. What he does when he gets there? He doesn’t know, exactly. But he’ll figure it out. In the meantime, he has to get there.
“Your dad scares me a little,” she confides in him, “I trust you when you tell me he isn’t going to truly hurt you, but what if his training sessions cause you to collapse in exhaustion or something? He’s so focused on your basketball that it is like he doesn’t see that you’re a real person.”
“Sometimes he’s not so bad,” Nathan returns, looking sideways at her, “I mean, sometimes, we’ll watch games together, and that’s okay, you know? It’s like hanging out with the guys. It just never lasts. It’s like the lightbulb will go on, and he’ll remember that he needs to push me into being what he couldn’t be due to his bum knee. And then it’s done, gone, like it was never there in the first place.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, “I bet that makes it worse. That sometimes it can be there, but when you turn around, it’s gone.”
He nods, his eyes focused on the road ahead of them. “I haven’t really thought about it, but maybe you’re right. I could see how that would work.”
“Anyway, it sucks,” she surmises, looking out the window, wondering how she let her life get so complicated. How she’s involved with the very different and very separate sons of a man who has done so much to drag each of them down. How she’s the middle between them, and one of them doesn’t even know it. Yeah, it all pretty much sucks for her right now.
He chuckles wryly at that. “I guess it does suck,” he agrees.
But maybe that’s just how life goes.
The pounding on the door wouldn’t stop. He’d yelled for whoever it was to go away, but apparently they didn’t care what he wanted. Maybe no one did anymore.
“God, do you know what ‘go away’ means?” he yells as he stomps angrily down the stairs, “I don’t want to buy your encyclopedias, and I’m sure as hell not going to find your religion this morning, either!”
He stops mid-tirade when he throws the door open to find Haley there. She’s glaring at him, her arms crossed over her chest, foot tapping, the whole deal. He just stares, open-mouthed, at her, unable to formulate any sort of appropriate response. Since the meeting for service club blew up in his face, he’s avoided her. Stopped going to tutoring, ignored her calls, ignored the notes she slipped in his locker, stayed away from her house.
It’s only been a week, but it has felt like a lifetime to him. He’s been extra surly to everyone at school, except Lucas and his crew, who he has avoided at all costs. It seems like one part of that doesn’t want to be avoided, though.
Tiredly, he runs his hand over his face, trying to wake up. And she just stares at his bare chest, trying not to drool. That would totally amuse him if it didn’t totally counter what he was trying to accomplish here.
“You shouldn’t be here,” he tells her, his voice gruff with emotion, “I gave you your out, Haley. You don’t have to deal with me anymore.”
“Deal with you?” she repeats, her eyes widening with her incredulity, “I can’t believe you even said that, you jerk. Like it wasn’t bad enough that you’ve avoided me, skipped tutoring, and refused to talk to me, but now you’re going to act like the martyr? That’s completely whack, Nathan Scott, and you know it.”
He stares at her, wilting a little in the intensity of her regard. Maybe it was stupid to decide to avoid her. When he couldn’t come up with a way to spare her when he took down Lucas, he decided he’d just cut her out altogether. He’d been miserable ever since, and everyone around him was paying the price for it.
“You aren’t going to say anything?” she shouts, not even wondering if his parents were there or anything, “God, you know what? Maybe I was right about you in the first place, maybe you are just a pathetic jerk.” Her eyes fill with tears, and he has to clench his hands into fists at his sides to keep from reaching for her. “I thought you were different than everyone thinks. That you were better. I was so wrong, I guess.”
“Why would you still want to bother with me?” he asks, his voice needier than he ever remembers it sounding, “Lucas said it, right? I’m not worth it.”
She gives him an odd look, pushing past him into the house. Her eyes keep dipping down to his chest before darting back up to eye level. “Since when do you care what he says?” she asks quietly, going upstairs, intent on getting to his room.
He follows after her, just like she intended, and he wonders when he turned into the lost puppy dog. “What are you doing?” he asks, calling after her as he takes the stairs two at a time to catch up.
She shrugs. “I like your room best.”
“It’s a teenage boy’s room,” he laughs, the first genuine laugh he’s had since the last time he was alone with her, “There’s a few posters of half-naked women.”
“It’s your room,” she shrugs again, looking at the carpet. Ah, there’s that vulnerability that he likes so much in her. He likes the bravado, too, but the vulnerability is such a turn-on to him.
“Why’d you come?” he asks quietly, watching her carefully.
“You just started avoiding me,” she points out, “And maybe I shouldn’t care, but I do. You owe me an explanation, at least. I risked a lot for you, a lot of me, a lot of my life, and you can’t just brush me off like this. It’s not fair, Nathan.”
“Life isn’t fair, Haley,” he quickly returns, but the words are hollow, and he just sits down on the bed. She sits down next to him, not quite touching, but close. “It was hard,” he goes on to admit, “To be reminded, by Lucas, of all people, that just burned me. And I’ll admit it, I’m not used to not having things fall my way, you know?”
She nods, not sure what that has to do with him giving her the cold shoulder, but getting a little of where he is coming from. “I don’t know what that has to do with me, though.”
“You,” he sighs, giving her a small smile, “You’re Lucas’s, you know? He gets to be your friend in public, and give you hugs and whatever, and talk to you, and you’re not going to freak about it. But if I even talked to you in a hallway at school, what would you do? You’d freak on me because no one can ever know that we’re friends.”
Reaching out, she puts her hand on his thigh, and he instantly hardens at the touch. He has this hyperawareness of her, and every touch from her sends shockwaves through his body. Without letting himself think about it, he turns towards her, gripping her face in his hands as he presses his lips to hers.
She gives in to his caresses, her lips parting under his. Her arms come up around his neck, holding tight. She is the one to break the kiss, though, pulling back and burying her face in his neck.
“I was jealous,” Nathan says aloud, “And then I was really, really pissed at myself for being jealous of him, because it wasn’t supposed to be that way.”
Her grip on him tightens, and she sighs into his hair. “You think I don’t get jealous of Taylor? Hell, Nathan, I’ve never been more jealous of anyone than I was of her when I found out that she - that she and you, you know.”
“That was a long time ago, and it was nothing,” he’s quick to assure her, “It was nothing. It meant nothing to me, she means nothing to me!”
“I know, Nathan,” she soothes, her hand rubbing over his neck, “But it doesn’t mean that I didn’t feel it, you know? It isn’t exactly a rational emotion.”
He nods against her shoulder. “I guess not,” he sighs, his arms tightening to pull her onto his lap, “What are you doing here? You should’ve been glad to be rid of me.”
She leans back to look him in the eye. She smiles wryly at him. “Funny thing happened on the way to getting you to back off Lucas - I started to like you a little bit.”
“Just a little?” he teases back, and she’s pleased to feel some of the tension seep out of his body, along with the return of his slightly cockier than the next guy attitude, “Because I like you a little, too.”
“Maybe more than a little,” she shrugs, playing coy.
“Me, too,” he nods solemnly, leaning forward to kiss her softly again. He cups her face gently in his hands, drawing her further and further into him. Her arms slide down his bare back so that her hands can rest on his hips. He lies back, stretching out on the bed. She stays with him, coming down to rest atop him. His fingers toy with the hem of her shirt, and reluctantly, he pulls his mouth away from hers. “Is this okay?” he asks as he rolls them over.
She knows what he’s asking of her, and she’s sure that if her mind wasn’t completely closed down at the moment, she’d have a thousand reasons why not. But for the moment, all she can breathe, feel, taste, smell, hear is him, and she doesn’t care about principles or antiquated ideas about waiting for marriage. None of that matters at all.
So she nods, opening her eyes to watch his face as he slides his hand under her shirt for the first time. He slides partially off of her, one of his heavy legs anchored across hers. As if she would try to run now. He props himself up on his elbow, his eyes intent on her face as he inches his hand under, just barely grazing her skin with his fingertips.
She sighs, tossing her head to get her hair over her shoulder, getting it out of her line of sight. She just…doesn’t want to miss any of this, whatever this is. His touch is so soft, so reverent that she just suddenly gets why Taylor and Viv were both so boy crazy. Still are, in Taylor’s case. But this, this feels so good, and he is staring at her so intently that she’s sure she could drown in this moment.
When he leans down to kiss her again, she’s sure she’ll combust. His fingers drift ever higher, grazing the bottom of her bra-covered breasts. It’s just so much, so fast, and the thought of stopping doesn’t even enter her mind. But when he rolls off of her, groaning as he puts a little space between them, she’s grateful that he would know her enough to pull back when maybe she didn’t realize she needed to.
“I’m sorry,” she sighs, her head falling to the side to look at him, “I’m not - I’d never figured I’d be that girl, that tease girl that everyone hates.”
He chuckles for a second, and then starts cracking up. “Haley, you aren’t a tease, trust me. Not on purpose, anyway. So don’t think that you’re like the girls that you’re picturing,” he grins, rolling back onto his side to face her. “I want to,” he says bluntly, “Right now, I want to take your clothes off, all of them, and do things to you that you’ve never even heard of. But I know you aren’t there yet, and I - I can be okay with it.”
“Really?” she asks in a voice laden with insecurity and self-doubt. And reality. It’s not like she lives under a rock - she knows exactly what kind of rumors swirl through the halls of Tree Hill High about Nathan Scott; she’d even repeated a few of them in disgust to Luke last year. She wasn’t so naïve as to think there wasn’t truth in any of them.
He moves again, this time so that one of his legs is resting between her own, and she can actually feel how much he wants her. Her eyes widen in surprise and shock and lust, and her heart stops for a few seconds when his hand comes up to fully cup her breast. The protective layer of bra and shirt so don’t even matter.
He leans his head down so that his mouth is close by her ear. “You feel that, right? You feel how much I want you, and believe me, no one else is doing this for me, Hay. It’s just you, and I can wait. I will wait.” He lifts his head to grin at her. “If you want to put me out of my misery and let me stop waiting, I wouldn’t complain, though,” he teases with a wink.
Her eyes widen with desire, her lips parting on a gasp. And as good as she feels, and she feels really good, thanks to him, a part of her feels guilty because the strain of holding himself back is evident on his face. She gives him a quick kiss on the corner of his mouth, and then moves out from under him. “I’m sorry that I’m not ready. I’m sure you’re not really used to waiting,” she sighs, sitting up against the headboard, pulling her knees against her chest.
He sits up next to her. “Maybe no one was ever worth waiting for before,” he says, grinning when her eyes widen comically. Sighing, he looks over at her. “If I promise to not ignore you again, will you wait for me to go take a cold shower?”
“Why would you do that?” she wonders, her nose crinkling, “It’s already kind of cold in here, Nathan. You should turn the thermostat up a degree or two.” She pauses, blinking as recognition dawns. “Oh. Um, I can just go. It probably isn’t really all that polite to barge into someone’s house this early on the weekend, huh? Yeah, so I’ll go, and you can…you know, and um, yeah. Tutoring, Monday, the dock. Okay.”
Laughing, he puts a hand on her shoulder, keeping her in place. “Stay, Haley. I’ll be fast, and then maybe we can go somewhere.”
“I can’t. I, um, have plans. Besides, where would we go?” she sighs, and he knows who the plans are with, “We still can’t just show up anywhere in town. There’s always someone we’d know around. You know, this is kind of frustrating.”
“Tell me about it,” he sighs, the double meaning apparent to both of them, and Haley blushes, “Hay, I didn’t mean it like that.”
She nods rapidly. “You know, maybe this was enough for today, because it has really been a lot. But um, tomorrow is Sunday. It’s January. Maybe we could drive out to the dunes. No one would be there.”
He smiles, nodding. “Yeah, let’s try that. I could pick you up around 10?”
“Okay,” she nods, her legs swinging off the bed, “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
“Yeah, you definitely will,” he agrees, smiling as sincerely as he’s capable of at her. In all fairness, he’s sure he’s getting better at that, at least with her. It’s kind of weird, actually.
Her phone rings, and she pulls it out of her pocket, glancing at the caller ID. “Um, do you mind?” she asks quietly, it paining her to do so because she knows he does, and truth is, she does, too.
“No, go ahead,” he nods, sighing as he leans his head back enough that he can fix his gaze on the ceiling.
“Hey Luke,” she answers, turning away, unable to look at Nathan while she talks to Luke, “What’s up?” She listens to him, and Nathan can tell just by the change in her posture that The Bastard is saying something she doesn’t like. “Okay, Luke? You know I’m happy for you, that you have Peyt and all that, but did you realize this is about the sixth time you’ve brushed me off in the last month? It kind of sucks.”
She turns around, a frown marring her pretty face, and Nathan sighs, ready to pound on Lucas for disappointing her again. What an ass.
“Fine, Luke, we’ll do it some other day,” she agrees, “No, not tomorrow, I already have plans.” Nathan smiles at her, a little surprised that she didn’t agree to go with him anyway. “It’s a family thing, Luke.” Running her hand through her hair, she shakes her head. “Trust me, you don’t want to be around for this one. Mom is getting her pictures back from when the baby was born. Dad thinks she got some really gross ones.” She laughs at his response to that. “Yeah, I didn’t think so. Look, I’ll talk to you later, okay? Bye.”
Nathan doesn’t say anything, just waits for her to quit pacing and let him in a little. For all that they’ve talked, he thinks that he’s let her in a lot further than she’s done. Or maybe his ‘in’ just gets darker a lot faster than hers does.
“Well, um, we could go today, if you wanted,” she smiles, trying to pretend like it doesn’t bother her. Does she really think he can’t see through that façade? God, he knows her so much better than that now. Maybe he doesn’t know everything, but he knows she’s not okay with Lucas blowing her off, and he’s not okay with it either.
“Want me to kick his ass?” Nathan asks hopefully, winking to let her know it’s a joke, “I think that would be fun for everyone.”
“Except maybe him,” Haley giggles, her arms wrapping around her middle as she shivers a little, “He might not like it so much.”
“You okay?” he asks, watching her with a little concern, yet another foreign feeling that Haley James is eliciting in him.
She shrugs, sitting down at the very edge of the foot of the bed. “Yeah, I am. It’s not a big deal, right? I mean, I’m probably being too hard line or something. This is what happens when we grow up, right? Your friends get girlfriends or boyfriends, and then suddenly, that’s who they want to spend all their time with. It’s life, right? So I shouldn’t be such a big baby about it, right?”
He shrugs, having no more insight to the situation than she does. “I don’t know the etiquette, Hay. I don’t have any real friends, right?”
She looks over her shoulder at him, giving him a small smile. “I thought this was my pity party, not yours.”
He gives her a mock wounded look, moving down so that he is lying facing the foot of the bed, and he can lean his head against her thigh. “You won’t share with me? Come on, pity is so much better when you can share it, right?”
“Am I not your friend?” she asks out of the blue, then blushes, her hands fidgeting in her lap, “I mean, you said you don’t have any friends, but I was kinda thinking that maybe we were friends, but if not, okay, I can understand. It’d be kind of weird, I guess, with Luke and Peyton and all. I get it, I really do.”
“Are you finished?” he asks her when the rambling stops, “You’re not my friend, Hay. You’re…I don’t know how to define what you are to me, except more. You’re just more than any label I could put on what you are to me. I - I guess that sounds stupid and probably doesn’t make sense, you really are more than anything to me.”
She stops fidgeting, one of her hands moving to brush over his hair. “Thank you,” she whispers, sliding off the end of the bed and turning so that she can face him, “We are friends, Nathan. But I like that we’re more, too.”
She leans forward, again kissing him. He likes that she’ll initiate it, likes that she wants to kiss him, to touch him. It’s just a relief that he isn’t always the one pushing, testing the boundaries. He’s glad that she feels safe enough to start things with him.
“I should go,” she sighs, “My mom really is getting pictures back today, and maybe I can see them before Taylor puts her skanky hands all over them. They aren’t of anything gross, just of Vivvy and the baby. And probably her husband. I don’t know. Want to come over?”
He wanted to come alright, but not over. Besides, he was pretty sure Dan would be home soon, and they were supposed have some sort of training session with a guy that Dan hired, and then watch tape. And he was pretty sure he wouldn’t like the consequences if he blew that off. It was probably for the better that Haley told him tomorrow for their outing.
“Nah, I should stay here,” he sighs, brushing his lips over hers again, “Dad has a few things planned for me this afternoon.”
Concern for him flits across her face, and that might be one of the sexiest things he’s ever seen. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? What’s he going to make you do this time?”
“Some new training regiment,” he explains, kissing the tip of her nose, drawing a giggle, “He’s even hired some dude who was a star in college hoops before blowing out his knee to work with me on fundamentals. That’s kind of cool. There’re always aspects of the game to improve.”
She crinkles her nose at him. “Okay, save the touchdown talk for Tim.”
“There aren’t touchdowns in basketball, Hay,” he reminds her, kissing her again, “Um, but you should get going. I still have to, ah, hop in the shower.”
A bright blush covers her cheeks, and he grins widely at her. That is one of the most fun things about her, the way she blushes at the drop of a hat. Or a word. “Okay,” she nods, standing up quickly, “I’ll see you tomorrow, Nathan. If things - well, if you need me tonight, just call or come over.”
He nods, a little touched that she’d think of him like that. No one has ever blinked at the way Dan treats him, at least not enough to do anything about it or say anything to him, so for her to get it, for it to matter her, that’s something. It’s a lot of things to him.
“Thanks,” he murmurs, watching as she walks to his door, “I’ll pick you up tomorrow. Don’t forget.”
”I won’t,” she promises, giving him another shy smile. He can tell by the hint of blush on her cheeks when she looks back at the bed, remembering where he’d touched her, how she’d squirmed against him. How his bare skin felt under her hands.
She leaves, and he stays on the bed for a minute, wondering how the hell he got here. In a constant state of want over a girl he wasn’t sure when he’d have. No relief in sight.
And he didn’t even care.
~*~
“Nathan, you’ve got to be quicker than that!” Raoul, his new trainer, tells him in his heavily accented English, “Your feet, they are too slow!”
“I’m trying,” Nathan grunts out, pinpricks of light starting to mar his vision, “Can we take a break? We’ve been at this for two hours!”
Raoul shakes his head, motioning for Nathan to continue. “Your father is not paying me to let you slack off, Nathan. Get going, get going!”
Groaning and wheezing, Nathan keeps going. Because if he doesn’t, Dan will hear about it. It was just like his father to make sure that he could control pretty much all aspects of Nathan’s life. Now he had a way to monitor Nathan when he wasn’t around, which was already starting to freak Nathan out a little bit.
When he’s too winded and tired to keep up with intense workout, Nathan lets himself fall to the hard floor of the gym, not looking up when he sees Raoul’s sneakers in front of him.
“Get up!” Raoul barks at him, “You are not this weak! I will not let you be this weak. You do not get to be great player without hard work! Do you not understand that? Your father says you do.”
“Yeah,” Nathan wheezes, “Well, my father doesn’t know jack shit about me, and you can tell him I said so, too.”
Raoul glares down at him, nudging him with his leg. “Get up, boy. Your father is not paying me for you to lie here. You nap when you get home!”
“I’m not doing this!” Nathan yells, or half yells, “I’m not his goddamn puppet! How am I supposed to be some great player when I’m too tired to run up and down the court during the game? You guys are assholes!”
“Scott comma Nathan,” Whitey shouts from the end of the gym. Nathan’s head snaps up, but when he sees that the rest of the team is standing there, including Lucas, he wishes he hadn’t looked, “Hit the showers. I’ll deal with this.”
Stifling another groan, Nathan pushes himself to his feet, each and every muscle in his body aching like crazy. He keeps his head lowered as he stalks past his teammates, not caring to see the looks on any of their faces, particularly Lucas’s. By the time he gets himself dressed in his school clothes, Whitey is coming into the locker room, sitting down on the bench across from him.
“So this is your daddy’s latest plan, huh? Run you into the ground?” Whitey shakes his head. “I don’t know about him, but then again, I never could figure him out. Are you okay? Physically?”
“I can play,” Nathan nods, not looking up, “I would’ve practiced, Coach.”
Whitey nods, his fingers stroking over his chin. “I know, son. Sometimes, it is best if we don’t, though, and I think this is one of them.”
“I can’t believe everyone saw that,” Nathan grumbles, shaking his head, “Even when he isn’t around, he finds ways to screw things up for me.”
“Forget them,” Whitey counsels, “Most of ‘em won’t even remember what happened in there tomorrow.”
“But one will,” Nathan sighs, getting to the crux of the matter, “He’ll remember and he’ll lord it over me forever.”
”Like you would’ve done to him?” Whitey asks knowingly, “You know, Nathan, your brother, he isn’t a bad guy. In fact, he’s a pretty good kid.”
“I wouldn’t know,” Nathan states flatly, “And I don’t really care, either. He’s virtually nothing to me.”
Whitey raises his eyebrows, smirking in amusement. “If he’s nothing to you, then why are you so set in getting him off this team?”
“I haven’t done anything to him in months,” Nathan protests, “I ignore him, he ignores me. What’s the big deal?”
“The big deal is that I need the two of you to start acting like teammates. Now, I don’t give a good gosh darn if you ever act like brothers, and I won’t be holding my breath, but you do need to act like teammates. Pass him the ball once in awhile. I’ve watched you, Nathan, and nine times out of ten, in practices and games, you’ll turn the ball over rather than pass to him! That stops now.”
Nathan looks up, frowning. “You’re asking for a miracle, Coach.”
“No, I’m not. I’m demanding it. And if I don’t get, I’ll make personnel changes, Nathan. Things won’t continue like this, not on my watch.”
“Whatever,” Nathan mutters angrily, standing up and grabbing his gym bag, “What else can I give him? My position? Oh, he has that already. Hmm, my girlfriend? Yeah, he got her, too. What else can I possibly give away, Coach?”
“This isn’t about giving something away,” Whitey tries to make him see, “This is about doing what is best for the team! There’s a huge difference. And I didn’t think you liked Chicken L - I mean, Miss Sawyer anymore. You’re still sore about that?”
“I didn’t mean her - oh, I didn’t mean anything,” Nathan stammers, turning and stalking out of the locker room.
As he’s leaving the school through the front doors, having avoided his teammates in the gym, he spots his father storming through the parking lot, obviously having been summoned by Raoul. He spots Nathan, and makes his way over to him.
“What the hell is wrong with you, Nathan?” he rages, grabbing his younger son by the collar of his shirt and dragging him through the parking lot, “I am spending thousands of dollars a month to have Raoul train you, and you’re throwing it away? Have you sustained brain damage that I wasn’t aware of lately?”
“He pushed too hard, Dad, I wouldn’t have had anything left for the game,” Nathan sighs, trying to wrest himself out of his father’s grip, “I needed to save something.”
“No, no you don’t. You’re past the point of conserving or whatever bullshit I’m sure Whitey, that old idiot, is letting you believe. You’re stinking up the court out there, Nathan! That doesn’t fly in this family!” Dan reminds him, “Besides, it’s only been three days! This training will get your endurance up, and then you won’t be on the floor crying for your mama.”
Nathan finally succeeds in breaking out of his father’s grip. “God, Dad! You want me to get my position back, and then you want me to get your other son off the team, and now you want me too tired to even play? I don’t get you at all.”
“No one ever said you had to get me, or understand. You’re seventeen. You just do what you’re told, Nathan.”
“Or what?” Nathan asks tiredly.
“Or you don’t want to know,” Dan snaps, “But you’d be sorry. Exceptionally sorry, Nathan.”
“You’re threatening me?” Nathan asks, incredulous that it has gone this low, “How could you threaten me?”
Dan smirks nastily at him, shaking his head. “Don’t you get it, Nathan? This is going to get done, one way or the other. And you can make it easy, and cooperate with me and Raoul, or you can make it hard. The point is, you will have this training. Or you just won’t play anymore. Period.”
Nathan gapes at him, his mouth dropping open in shock. “You’d pull me from the team? You can’t do that, Dad!”
“I’m your parent,” Dan explains condescendingly, “I can pretty much do whatever I want to, and you know that as well as I do.”
“Mom wouldn’t go for it!” Nathan exclaims, grasping at straws.
“Your mother probably doesn’t even know what grade you’re in now,” Dan snips, rubbing salt in one of Nathan’s more open wounds, “She won’t care if you’re not playing basketball anymore!”
“It isn’t fair,” Nathan tries, desperate to get Dan off his back, “Come on, I’m having a great season! Whitey says I’m the best player my age he’s ever coached! Doesn’t that count for something?”
“Whitey’s lying to you, Nathan,” Dan frowns, patting him on the shoulder, “I’m not saying that you couldn’t be, but you’ve got a lot of work to do. With me, and with Raoul.”
“Gee, father son bonding time. And some guy Daddy hired and son bonding time. How nice,” Nathan snarks, shaking off Dan’s hand, “You know, once upon a time, basketball was actually fun.”
“It isn’t supposed to be fun,” Dan laughs rudely, “It’s a sport, and the point is to win. And you don’t win unless you’re the best. And you will be the best, Nathan. It’s just that simple.”
Defeated, Nathan nods. “Yeah, fine. Whatever, we’ll do it your way. Since that’s obviously the only way that there is, right, Dad?”
Dan smirks knowingly. “In this case? Yes, it is.”
There’s nothing else to say, so Nathan turns and walks back into the school, letting Dan get the last word. That’s just about Dan’s favorite pastime, so he knows he won’t get called back. That’s the saving grace of this godawful afternoon, knowing he won’t have to see his father until he gets home. And if he has any say in it, that won’t be for awhile.
Knowing that Lucas will be in practice a bit longer, he goes to the tutoring center. That morning, Haley had told him that she and Luke were going to hang out that night, play some golf thing on the roof of his mother’s café. But now he’s got an in to get her to change those plans, and he is not afraid to use it.
He looks through the small window on the door, tapping on it when he sees that she’s alone in there. She blinks in surprise to see him, and then a panicked look crosses her face. She hurries over to the door, letting him in. Ignoring the screaming muscles in his body, he bends down, picking her up as he hugs her to him. She’s stiff with surprise for a few seconds, but then she melts against him, wrapping her arms around him.
Setting her down, he buries his face in her neck. “Are you okay?” she asks quietly, and then, “Nathan, Luke is coming here to meet me after practice.”
He sighs, nodding. “Yeah, he should be there for another twenty minutes or so. Whitey sent me home.”
“Why, what happened?” Haley asks in concern, pulling back to look at him. “You didn’t fight, did you? You don’t look like it.”
He shakes his head, dropping into one of the chairs. “No, Raoul and I had a session before practice started. It’s just so hard, Hay. He has me running and moving so much and so fast that I’ll start seeing spots and feeling like I’ll pass out. I just can’t do it.”
She sits down on the chair next to his, her hand coming up to massage his neck. “I’m sorry, Nathan. I know how much it’s taking out of you, and it’s only been a couple of days.”
“It gets worse. Whitey threatened to bench me, and then Dad showed up, pissed that we’d ended the training session early.”
“Oh, Nathan,” she sighs, her forehead resting against his upper arm.
“I don’t know how I’m going to keep it all going,” he admits truthfully, sighing with a touch of relief when she wraps her arms around him, “I just want it to be done.”
She doesn’t know what he means, and he’s not going to elaborate her to the truth: that he wants Lucas off the team. Once that happens, he knows Dan is going to ease up on him, at least a little. And then his problems with Whitey will cease and desist, and everything will go back to normal. He just has to step up his plan to get rid of Lucas. Hell, he has to make a plan that goes beyond seducing Haley, and really stick it to Lucas.
“Hang in there, Nathan. I’m here if you need anything.”
He gives her his best pathetic smile, feeling a little guilty about manipulating her now, but pushing that aside. “Nah, you do enough for me as it is. I think I’m just going to go home. I don’t feel like being anywhere public, and since the guys on the team all witnessed the scene with Raoul, they’re all out of the question.”
She chews on her lower lip, and he knows that she’s already considering how to cancel on Lucas to spend time with him. Leaning forward, he brushes his lips across her cheek to her ear, inhaling the fresh, clean smell of her hair.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, pretty girl. Provided my dad doesn’t kill me in my sleep, or with his protein shake in the morning,” he morbidly jokes, driving it home that his home is the last place he should be right now. He gets up and walks to the door.
“No!” she exclaims, jumping to her feet. She comes over to him, grabbing his hands. “No, don’t go home.”
“You have a better idea?” he asks in feigned surprise.
Again gnawing on her lower lip, she nods hesitantly. “Come home with me,” she offers, and he fights to contain his grin, “Taylor is gone, visiting her sorority, and my parents are always glad to see you.”
He frowns, pretending to think. “But don’t you have plans? Hay, I wouldn’t ask you to break your plans for me. I’m not that selfish.”
“You’re not asking,” she shrugs, looking conflicted, “I’m offering. And I’ll feel like a total jerk for bailing on him when I got so upset about him bailing on me, so I’m going to count on you to make me feel better.”
He grins hugely, almost forgetting the pain and stress of the day. “Haley James, are you flirting with me?”
She laughs, and he, acting like a total girl, melts a little. “Maybe. Just maybe I am. Would that be such a bad thing?”
He shakes his head slowly, his hands dropping hers to rest on her hips. He pulls her flush against him. “It wouldn’t be a bad thing at all.”
“Well, good then,” she smiles, her lips parting when he brings his down to them, “Very good.”
He waits in his truck for her, grinning when she comes out ten minutes later. “I thought you’d be longer,” he says as she climbs in, “None of the guys have come out.”
She shrugs. “I stood at the door until Whitey got sick of me being there, and then I told Luke I had to cancel.”
“Was he mad?” Nathan asks carefully, trying to keep the glee out of his voice. Because Lucas being mad? Would totally make him gleeful. Even the thought of it does.
“No, not really,” she laughs wryly, “He seemed tired, and I’m sure he’s hoping that Peyton is free tonight. His heart? Was not too broken.”
“Mine would’ve been,” he flirts with her, winking as he starts the truck.
“You are such a flirt!” she accuses, “Sometimes I think that it is your first nature.”
“What’s my second nature then?” he asks, glancing over at her as he pulls out of the parking lot.
“Don’t ask questions that you don’t want the answers to,” she admonishes him in a teasing voice, but the words still hit him.
“What does that mean?” he asks tensely.
She gives him an exasperated look, rolling her eyes. “God, don’t be so sensitive, Nathan. It wasn’t a dig at you, believe me. I was teasing. You’ve been over to my house enough to know what that looks like.”
Unrepentant, he shrugs. “Yeah, okay,” he sighs, “I guess I’m being a little sensitive.”
“And that’s okay,” she offers, “Sometimes. All the time? That’d be totally annoying, but sometimes, it’s cool.”
She smiles at him, and he knows he’s off the hook. “Yeah, you know, the teasing thing was never big in my house,” he shrugs, “Unless you count my dad calling me a lazy punk teasing.”
Her face falls a little, and he knows that he’s just making himself seem more pathetic in her eyes. But if this is his way in with her, the one that will get him in the furthest, then he’ll use it. He wants to be in her bed, in her life in every way that counts, and he wants to be there soon. What he does when he gets there? He doesn’t know, exactly. But he’ll figure it out. In the meantime, he has to get there.
“Your dad scares me a little,” she confides in him, “I trust you when you tell me he isn’t going to truly hurt you, but what if his training sessions cause you to collapse in exhaustion or something? He’s so focused on your basketball that it is like he doesn’t see that you’re a real person.”
“Sometimes he’s not so bad,” Nathan returns, looking sideways at her, “I mean, sometimes, we’ll watch games together, and that’s okay, you know? It’s like hanging out with the guys. It just never lasts. It’s like the lightbulb will go on, and he’ll remember that he needs to push me into being what he couldn’t be due to his bum knee. And then it’s done, gone, like it was never there in the first place.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispers, “I bet that makes it worse. That sometimes it can be there, but when you turn around, it’s gone.”
He nods, his eyes focused on the road ahead of them. “I haven’t really thought about it, but maybe you’re right. I could see how that would work.”
“Anyway, it sucks,” she surmises, looking out the window, wondering how she let her life get so complicated. How she’s involved with the very different and very separate sons of a man who has done so much to drag each of them down. How she’s the middle between them, and one of them doesn’t even know it. Yeah, it all pretty much sucks for her right now.
He chuckles wryly at that. “I guess it does suck,” he agrees.
But maybe that’s just how life goes.