From My Muse's Journal...
I copy and pasted this out of Jason Mraz's Journal because for the love of GAWD...The man makes me pee myself...I can totally relate to what he's talking about here...except maybe the drinking of the Jell-O mix...
monday march 1
Soda Jerk.
How many Cokes would you have to drink before your pee turned brown? I mean
our kidneys aren’t that strong are they that they could continue to filter
out all the caramel from the cola before it exits our bodies. I suppose we
would rather see blood before we experienced something carbonated coming
from our urinary tract.
I drank Jello mix once. At the time, the word on the street was that it
would make you pee clean before a drug test. I don’t know if it worked or
not because I also drank about two weeks worth of water, I doubled my daily
intake of goldenseal, and right before the test I did that detoxification
tea that you have to drink a gallon of two hours prior to your examination.
Of all the tests I’d ever taken in my life that was the one I studied for
the most. As for the Jello mix, my kidneys didn’t know what to think and
they just let it pass. It was weird and as thick as you’d expect. I
practically peed a spaghetti noodle.
I can’t count the amount of Coke I’ve consumed in the last week. I normally
only allow myself about 12 ounces a day, but ever since one of my roommates
robbed the Coca-Cola truck, I haven’t been able to control myself. I’m not
one hundred percent positive they lifted the truck or whether or not they
just went to Costco, but we suddenly have tons of it. Maybe they won an
under-the-cap game and from now on we’ll have a lifetime supply. I should
ask to better prepare myself for the future. I’d like to be friends with my
kidneys for a long time. After that jello incident, our relationship was on
the fritz. It took us forever to make up.
Awareness is the key to longevity I believe; knowing what’s good for you and
what’s harmful in the long run, and what presently improves your peace of
mind and state of well being. I do plenty of things that doctors would
consider to be a major risk to my health, but I’m happy as a clam doing so,
which in a metaphysical viewpoint, actually makes me a more healthy human
being. I would consider riding in cars to be a health risk. Anyone can get a
license (Adam King) and drive at whatever speed they see fit and at anytime,
my own vehicle could collide with any other and that would be it. Good-bye
cool world, thanks for the Coke. And with this brooding mystery of when and
how we’ll cross over, a question that dons our minds from time to time, I
like to know I’m living each day as if it were the last, aside from the few
things I would do should I ever find out it is my last day. One thing I
would do is sky dive. That looks fun. I would also like to surf naked as
well as streak my local grocery store. The lighting is really nice in there
after they remodeled the place. I think it would be flattering to my figure.
I’d also like to cuddle a Panda bear. I know it’s probably unsafe, but it is
after all my last day of existence and they’re so darned cute it pains me
that I can’t go near them. In a similar vain I’d like to surf on the back of
a whale like they do at Sea World. That also looks really fun. And maybe I’d
finally put that “how much Coke would it take before you know what happens”
to the test.
I’ve got it all figured out. Because of this, life doesn’t suck. I’m happy
knowing that I’m done with dating having found the one I love in my own
backyard. I happy knowing John Mayer will never return my phone calls. I
happy knowing I’ve recorded a great record due out never it feels like. I’m
happy with my band of merry men. I’m happy with my blood type. I’m happy
with my childhood. I’m happy I have this outlet to be random to remind me
that worry is a sack of shit. I’m happy to be happy all the time.
Or maybe I’m just high on caffeine.
God bless you, Mraz...You truly are one "bad mother..."
monday march 1
Soda Jerk.
How many Cokes would you have to drink before your pee turned brown? I mean
our kidneys aren’t that strong are they that they could continue to filter
out all the caramel from the cola before it exits our bodies. I suppose we
would rather see blood before we experienced something carbonated coming
from our urinary tract.
I drank Jello mix once. At the time, the word on the street was that it
would make you pee clean before a drug test. I don’t know if it worked or
not because I also drank about two weeks worth of water, I doubled my daily
intake of goldenseal, and right before the test I did that detoxification
tea that you have to drink a gallon of two hours prior to your examination.
Of all the tests I’d ever taken in my life that was the one I studied for
the most. As for the Jello mix, my kidneys didn’t know what to think and
they just let it pass. It was weird and as thick as you’d expect. I
practically peed a spaghetti noodle.
I can’t count the amount of Coke I’ve consumed in the last week. I normally
only allow myself about 12 ounces a day, but ever since one of my roommates
robbed the Coca-Cola truck, I haven’t been able to control myself. I’m not
one hundred percent positive they lifted the truck or whether or not they
just went to Costco, but we suddenly have tons of it. Maybe they won an
under-the-cap game and from now on we’ll have a lifetime supply. I should
ask to better prepare myself for the future. I’d like to be friends with my
kidneys for a long time. After that jello incident, our relationship was on
the fritz. It took us forever to make up.
Awareness is the key to longevity I believe; knowing what’s good for you and
what’s harmful in the long run, and what presently improves your peace of
mind and state of well being. I do plenty of things that doctors would
consider to be a major risk to my health, but I’m happy as a clam doing so,
which in a metaphysical viewpoint, actually makes me a more healthy human
being. I would consider riding in cars to be a health risk. Anyone can get a
license (Adam King) and drive at whatever speed they see fit and at anytime,
my own vehicle could collide with any other and that would be it. Good-bye
cool world, thanks for the Coke. And with this brooding mystery of when and
how we’ll cross over, a question that dons our minds from time to time, I
like to know I’m living each day as if it were the last, aside from the few
things I would do should I ever find out it is my last day. One thing I
would do is sky dive. That looks fun. I would also like to surf naked as
well as streak my local grocery store. The lighting is really nice in there
after they remodeled the place. I think it would be flattering to my figure.
I’d also like to cuddle a Panda bear. I know it’s probably unsafe, but it is
after all my last day of existence and they’re so darned cute it pains me
that I can’t go near them. In a similar vain I’d like to surf on the back of
a whale like they do at Sea World. That also looks really fun. And maybe I’d
finally put that “how much Coke would it take before you know what happens”
to the test.
I’ve got it all figured out. Because of this, life doesn’t suck. I’m happy
knowing that I’m done with dating having found the one I love in my own
backyard. I happy knowing John Mayer will never return my phone calls. I
happy knowing I’ve recorded a great record due out never it feels like. I’m
happy with my band of merry men. I’m happy with my blood type. I’m happy
with my childhood. I’m happy I have this outlet to be random to remind me
that worry is a sack of shit. I’m happy to be happy all the time.
Or maybe I’m just high on caffeine.
God bless you, Mraz...You truly are one "bad mother..."