i tend to use 'cock' (it goes back to medieval period at least) and is one of the few i never feel stupid using in most time periods. Not to mention has the advantage of not sounding too flowery or too 'this is the nickname for my manparts'
Given that they say "okay" and "shut up" on the show, I don't worry too much about modern language. If you want to use archaic slang, you're probably better off looking in the 12th or 13th century than the 5th... since they weren't even speaking English then. You might find this helpful (or just interesting): http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?search=vulva http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?search=penis
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http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?search=vulva
http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?search=penis
This might also give you some ideas. Also maybe the 1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue.
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