rec.games.miniatures.warhammer Outtakes. Enjoy.
[accent="Freudian"]
I think you have repressed feelings toward your mother. You want to have sex with
her and kill you father. My advice is to drink heavily and begin using cocaine. It
worked for me.
[/accent]
I enjoyed it. Baz, eat someone else. Er, only not me.
No, I'm a musician; I can count to 5.
Please don't say I remember something from Star Trek.
I'd trade my left penis to be normal.
*insert comment without any real content here to continue the thread*
Then it stops because I can't think of a worse insult than American.
I have yet to know of a single Californian that knows of the world outside of the San Fernando valley.... "Germans? Aren't they, like, those guys who lived long ago?"
Nothing more warming to a father's heart than to hear his little princess
scream out: "HA HA! I'm Berzerk! DEATHBLOW! Kill the Gobbos! Die you little green savages!"
That's ok, I'm still waiting for the Blood Patch for Xtreme Barbie Lipstick Assault...
No wonder I am an atheist. I cannot blindly follow anything.
A Warhammer troll is a creature which is subject to stupidity and attacks by spewing
forth its vomit. A Usenet troll is identical in both respects.
The newsgroup's own Fluff Nazi League... er, sorry, Fluff People's Collective, or whatever they are calling themselves now,
Just because it's on Usenet doesn't mean it's a personal attack.
He has a lot on his mind, and we all know that's never been a load-bearing structure at the best of times.
Does that mean I have had my heterosexuality confirmed by being omitted from
your address book? Seems like a rather odd way to do it really.
Ghetto style: finding six of your friends to help you roll a pensioner
because you're all too pissweak to manage it on your own. Even with guns.
You use a spell-checker? Ewww, that's a real turn-off, you know.
RGMW. Come in peace, stay in peace, leave in peace. Otherwise leave in pieces.
oh, and i never use caps either. this has no relevance on this subject. I just felt like pointing that out. so there.
Is that a word? And if it is, I bet I spelt it wrong...
America didn't lose the vietnam war.
I died. Which sort of means I don't get to post as much now.
I don't know if it's the blessing, but Gin & Holy Water is fab!
I just checked. I'm still not from Iowa.
He was also rendered deaf in one ear by a
practical joke involving a US artillery piece
I've got a Get Out Of Unwanted Situations Free card.
If it looks like a Troll, smells like a Troll, and says something really fucking dumb, then it's probably a Troll.
I mean, imagine it. A sexually ambiguous redneck with access to almost unlimited supplies of booze.
It's too scary for words.
Bugger off. I've read funnier things in the Watchtower.
Your witty comebacks lack... Wit.
You had better know the quote or I'm taking away your gay license.
I order you not to flame anyone for at least one week. Is that clear?
Not for one week, even if Alec Peters comes back to announce his
engagement to his new life partner ROB.
If your mind was any narrower, the local council would be proposing plans
for a bypass.
Just how does one "run like fuck"? Does it involve a lot of stickiness?
OK, that means I get to try and rape myself.
The server was down for a short while on Monday. (i.e. until I came in on
Tuesday morning and rebooted it.)
Now look here, you arrogant little toerag, I happen to be a step-child
bastard and I will *not* tolerate being compared to WebTV!
I still want to see Hollywood Hogan run for Prez, and then get it. Then
you'd all truly get what you deserve.
Hello, I'd like to say welcome to the group and please die in hell.
I know it's kind of unorthodox and untraditional and all that, but what
the hell - here's a sensible reply.
You're beginning to sound just like Evil Homer. I've yet to decide
whether this is a good or a bad thing.
You'll learn. Think of this group like prison. You only get respect if
you flame someone or become someone's bitch.
Well, to be fair, if GW *hadn't* started making things up out of their
arses all those years ago, this NG wouldn't even exist.
Oh yeah, and the Pope is a black jewish lesbian prostitute from Singapore.
God dammit! Stop trying to turn me on! A female gamer that can program?
I am *not* a prostitute. Not a professional one, anyway.
Doesn't sound any different to any of the newspapers printed here. My
grandmother could proofread better, and she's dead. Except that they tend
to be more of the idiot header variety like "Gays caught in back passage -
Police probe uncovers sex ring".
Is this an private insult-fest, or can anyone join?
#| <-- Jimi's hash pipe
Why do all of my great days now seem to revolve around being allowed to
sleep past 9am?
And kids, don't forget to check out beer once you turn 14. In only four
years time you can drink it legally!
IIRC, the French tend to surrender as soon as they find out that the other
side owns guns.
Sorry, you're wrong there. This *is* my own personal newsgroup, and you
can all lick my boots like the grovelling scum that you are.
Erm... I think you're confusing your career as an evil supervillain
with that of a psychologist.
I read every message of every thread that does not
involve homo/pedi/besti/Bazi-rotica.
[followed by the most gigantic snip since Gargantua's circumcision]
I thought we told you before - no summoning Elder Gods to usenet. It hogs
too much bandwidth...
ObDisclaimer: I am not a smoker. I am, however, an asshole.
It's the mysterious Area 51 of the GW world. It's exact location is a
mystery, as are the activities carried out there. Although GW personnel at
the base have categorically denied that they have the captured,
cryogenically frozen bodies of several Squats in a hidden underground
bunker.
And after the spanking, the... I think I'll wait for the chicks to show up.
Just wondering... considering the way that you did this (along
with your apologizing in the second post) when you sit down at
a table in a resturaunt do you request two plates?
One for each face?
This is bizzare, gay pirate hackers... You could make a movie out of
this.
Just to earn it's tag, this post will now mention the word fellatio.
Thank you.
Warhammer Quest. Definitely the wrong group - we only do homoerotica and
Alladvantage spam here I'm afraid...
And that was a menacing "F*ck with me and you're going to regret it" kind of
heh, just in case you didn't notice...
Finally, has anyone seen or heard anything from Tom Beliech or Jonas
"Originator of the constantly changing sig on RGMW" Whitespore (AKA Crazy
Eddie the Fourth) around lately? Tom was supposed to visit eventually
(probably Gen Con 2000 at this point) and Jonas owes me $9.
No offence taken, but i dont think it has anything to do with brain power
anyway, just the length of the shaft.
Apparently I'm being either fellated or stalked. Maybe both.
With those qualifications, I could be President!
Reality is a long, horrible, on-topic post. And everyone knows on-topic posts
don't exist.
We don't get many trolls here - well, we do, but call them regulars.
Ahhh, this is much better. Personally, I have no idea WTF my IQ is or even
what it means, so I think I'll brag about my dick too. I can also brag
about my arse, so this thread definitely has some potential. Would anyone
like to join the discussion?
I don't mind [OT], but at least make it kinky.
DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed here are solely those of the author's who
doesn't care whether or not you think he is a right wing nut. Please
forgive any spelling and/or grammatical errors for he is also a victim of
the American public education system.
With the shirts I wear, embarrassment is foreign to me...
If the yanks dont like me posting about another shooting incident then
get them to stop shooting people!!
You do have the full range of Demonically Evil add-ons, don't you?
Including Office 97?
They're quite lovable really, unless you happen to be black, Jewish, have
more money than them, or just get in their way ...
We're here for you man. RGMW, the support group for perverts.
Hooray! A real damn argument now! You yanks can shove your guns up your
arse, we're arguing about Dr Who!!
I have no self-esteem, and need to use a large sig to bolster my failing ego.
The British contingent of this NG will have something to say about
life in the US when they finally manage to do something slightly more
useful than carrying the US armed forces luggage to the next third
world smackdown that we deliver.
Of course, RGMW stands for Rogered Guys Moaning and Whining...
I was going to extend this argument, but I went for a piss and
forgot my next paragraph. Damn.
Personal code of honour. I don't do the following:
1) Sleep with dead things, children, or animals.
2) Drink American "beer".
3) Post binaries.
I think we need a "don't ask, don't tell" policy on this NG...
I've got you figured out. You're only in this for the text.
I believe the term you are looking for is " Official RGMW Chocolate-Covered
Skank Ho"
Ooo.. NO YOU WON'T DRAG ME INTO THIS SMUT!!!!!!!!!
But... Could you do that again. This side, this time? And call me
mommy...
But sleeping with dead baby animals is what life is all about!
Unless the exchange rate changes, and Canadian money becomes worth -more- than
Monopoly money.
All innocent and/or sensible persons have 12 hours to leave this NG. After
that, we can no longer guarantee your sanity.
Well, you've just met all the qualifications to be a professional author, in
that you have no qualifications to be an author.
I dunno, he quite enjoys people holding candles up to his perversion, but
the smell of scorched hair is atrocious. :)
It's not silly. You did spell glair wrong. Just because there's no such
word as glair, doesn't mean you didn't spell it wrong...
There actually exists a thread with more than a hundred posts and no
homosexual innuendo. (A scientific viewpoint of the flood) The subject
itself naturally has absolutely nothing to do with GW games, but that
would be asking too much, don't you think.
You're too young for this filth. Go and browse the hardcore porn groups
instead, less chance of you being corrupted...
All hail the wonky Hamster of Doom, Bucktoothed Harbinger of the Apocalypse!
*Vomits* ROBCPW1/AlecPeters/Rec.games.miniatures.warhammer.kinky.sex
.latex.bestiality.corpses.and.even.altar.boys
That is *sooo* cheesy. Didn't I say Codex: God would be full of hyped-up
super-cheese?
Frankly, it looked more legible when I ROT13ed it.
You bastard, leave those words in my mouth alone... They are already
twisted enough...
Actually, for me, fucking is just fine.
All we need are quad combiweapons to solve all of our differences.
Hey, you can't talk to him like that. As a successful lawyer,
astronaut, cabalist, baker, organ donor, gun runner, priest, bookie,
crimefighter, stand up comedian and pro wrestler I can safely say that
if you continue to make slanderous allegations like that I'll be forced
to fly to the US and rape your pets. Twice.
Stop being so goddam polite. I'm trying to start a flame war here.
You mis-spelled "M45T3R H4X0R."
(PS -- how long does the typical thread's title remain valid for,
anyway? I want to see some statistics.)
Jeepers. Maybe somebody should start a newsgroup devoted to GW
miniatures games.
I think we need to start a support group....."Hi, my name is Matt and I
used....AOL."
Oh, come on! You've been here before! You know we don't actually
DISCUSS anything around here. We just trade insults, semi-coherent
rants, off-topic opinions, and snappy .sig lines.
Well, your 'emotional pain' is bleeding all over my carpet.
I'd see a porno flick with Kylie Minogue!!
(Either Kylie in the movie, or Kylie out
sitting on the bed with me. Either interpretation
works just fine as far as I'm concerned...)
I'm glad I stopped by this newsgroup, I've learned so much about
Warhammer.
Mature? Don't you ever accuse us of being that again...
"I know what the rule says, Tuomas, but you *know* what I meant. If I
have to change it I'll have to walk *ALL* the way back up to the
computer doohickey..."
Whoa...we're on topic. What happened?
It's finally happened. My Warhammer hobby has left me homeless and
penniless. My car was repossessed this morning.
I suggest contacting the RTC - but be careful,
they're a funny lot and much given to impaling unbelievers with sharp
pointy things and removing people's heads for the slightest
transgression. Some of them like eating people, too.
I knew that guy at the GW store was looking at me strangely while I was
feeding cheese to the Skaven . . .
Hah! Look out for my lethal commando Nurgling, then.
A Texan AND a Frenchman? Wouldn't that cause some kind of arrogance
singularity, sucking the ego out of everything around it, and causing a
massive personality black hole which made all other topics of conversation
except it's own bloated superego impossible?
Well, if you have Squats, I'm sorry to tell you that these are almost
completely worthless. It seems you can't unload these even if you try
to give 'em away free with other figures. I will do you a HUGE favor,
if you have any, and buy any that you have at $0.50 a pound.
Oh, come now...this NG was never serious. How seriously can you take a
forum that's dedicated to playing outrageously-expensive games with
little plastic and metal soldiers? You can't. Part of the problem here
is that people are taking this way too seriously.
No no no NO. You don't apologise and say something sensible, you're
supposed to now flame everyone and take an outrageous stance on a highly
debated topic.
Hey, I'm not you.
Oh, wait a sec, yes I am.
Well... I chose the Eldar. They are so very color coordinated, and
they have such pretty outfits. And there is the beret of course, and
ritual sodomy. Mmmmmmhhhhh.... ritual sodomy.
This is weird. I had an image of two Marines trying to kick out a
gatecrashing Greater Daemon...
First of all, DIE DIE FUCKING DIE!
Second of all, see the first.
Understands that a game can be named differently between
countries. Marvels at the fact that the UK guys are actually rallying
around this.
When making Shepherd's Pie, try to avoid using real shepherds.
SSSHHHHHH!! I'm busy trying to pick up hot internet chicks, do you mind?
A French wargame? That's a novel concept. What do you do, see who can drop
their weapons the fastest, run for cover and surrender??
Now that I got the Steering Wheel patch, my car hardly ever
crashes. Waddaya mean it was supposed to COME with one...?
Anal cigarettes? Yeeeow.
So, in a way, it is worth the money (I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS).
I find that bulldog clips are indispensable. Being immune to Tippex,
they can start shredding paper / pinning writing implements from the
first turn. Of course, they have to watch out for that bloody blu-tack,
though.
A "Version-change" (similar to a sex change but more painful)
If this childish patriotic/religious/intolerant nonsense doesn't stop
right now, NOBODY's going to heaven. Catch my drift? Good.
Certainly, sir. Today's speciality is liquified redneck with diced Alec
Peters. We also have ROB marinaded in its own bullshit, and raw
Thrasher delicately sprinkled with Al-Hussein(TM) anthrax spores. Might
I recommend the Evil Homer(TM) Shredded Newbie for dessert. All served
with a side-salad of chopped Comizzar and Phoenixflare.
Codex: Leman Russ Right Sponson Heavy Bolter Ammo Hopper Third Shell
Down From the Top, painted Green and Named Richard by the Tank
Commander.
It almost appears as if this festering pit of filth has degenerated into
a semi-respectable on-topic newsgroup. Say it isn't so.
HA! I just killfiled god!
Pompous know it all: Someone who doesn't think 100 is a high number for
an IQ.
You're thinking of the soon-to-be-released battlefield sewing kit surely
(RRP £15). Including quick release zip pockets allowing GW quick access
to your wallet and a free bottle of Citadel Colour T-shirt dye (contains
only enough to dye 75% of your shirt, so you must buy another (RRP £10).
Transfers will also be sold separately (£5 each), and then there's the
official GW needle set (boxed set of 5 sewing needles £25) - only shirts
which have been modified using official GW needles and accessories will
be allowed into official GW stores/events.
Better than being anally raped by a moose and living.
3. I've also heard that Jews are trying to take over the world. I'm
busted on this one. I'm working independantly on the problem, however,
and none of my family members (to the best of my knowledge) are
attempting world domination.
ObDisclaimer: I hear Tom Clancy interviews sailors before he writes a
book. Said sailors must be having a great laugh at his expense right
now.
Bobbies. How can anyone be afraid of anything named "Bobbies"?
A great deal of people on this NG are stupid kids who think they have
the world figured out. The rest are stupid adults who think they have
the world figured out . . .
Before start I'd like to say that the word "Sex" was included in the title
merely to get more people to read this.
ROBCPW1 is a fucking you.
Oops, disregard that stylish pun. I've just realised that it sounds like an
Italianised warning of an attack upon the readers person...
Gotta love it when someone with a .fi at the end of their address has
better English skills than someone with a .uk at the end of theirs...
At last!! Someone else who uses the term "darkies"!!! I thought it was
dead long ago. *wipes tear from eye* ah, that reminds me of my childhood -
my grandfather ranting on about niggers and spics and krauts, and the rest
of my family saying, "Yes, well, erm, quite. Did you see that programme on
BBC 2?"
Actually, Roboute was writing the Codex, and he needed to make sure it
was up to scratch. So, for the entire Heresy, he had the whole *legion*
parading up and down on Ultramar, repainting their armour, parading,
designing laurel wreaths, parading, building statues to the Emperor,
parading - oh, and partaking of the traditional Ultramarine ritual of
group sodomy. Repeatedly. In companies. On the parade ground. In
formation.
I'm probably an illiterate idiot, yet you seem to have a hard time accepting the Vietnam war as lost
(irregeradless of whether it was), rendering the above statement about you true. Again; unless I'm
an illiterate idiot, which I probably am.
You can't make an omelette without breaking Jervis^Weggs.
You backpedal so much that I just have to unzip and not have to chase your furry arse down.
No. I have something special planned for McVey; a death connected to
his sin... we'll feed him ever Lemartes miniature in the place.
Damn straight!
Let's capture all the studio. Tie them to chairs.
"Now, Mr. McVey. Ve have a few questions to ask you..."
"Ah. Mr. Priestly. So nice of you to join us?"
"Do you expect me to talk?"
"No, Mr. Woods. I expect you to die...."
Is he trying to say that Faith In Christ will get people laid in the
afterlife? That's a new take on it.
GO: No, no, really, they're, um, well, they're... Rizla papers, that's
what they are! Oh yes.
FI: Oh yes?
GO: (Begins frantically rolling top secrets documents) Oh yes. Got a
light?
Damn you Bourbon! Damn you straight to hell!
Well, not *straight* to hell... (gulp)
Here is a universal Chaos Motto:
Trying to overthrow the Imperium for 10,000 years, and still haven't
gotten it right.
Suddenly, there was a great lurch in the space time continuum, as
every member of RGMW lost their lunch.
Actually, it's been proven that 80% of RGMW are complicated AI programs.
19% are overweight, balding white men who never leave their homes.
The remaining 1% are clueless newbies and/or trolls.
BTW, this is the true reason for the Horus Heresy: the Loyalist were
into opera and ballet, and the heretics were into musicals.
Perhaps he knows a HUGE Harley-Biker kinda guy covered in tattoos,
several randomly-placed body-piercings, shaved head and red goatee!
Wearing leather, wrapped in chains, and smoking a ceegar!
"Where's that bitch Alec Peters? Joe Schulte's the name, sodomizing's
the game!"
I think it should go to
rec.bloody.scientists.showing.off.their.'A'.grade.at.physics.A.level, to
be honest ...
Okay, kiddies, I'm starting to feel sorry for the pathetic, child
molesting, UET afflicted dork. We've got to leave him *one* of his
illusions.
However, we will stop sending orders to people who insist on "group
hugs" as part of a (quickly decided) company policy.
You missed a FUCKING between THIS & NEWSGROUP.
Still, I think the IG could use a combat engineer corps. They should be tough
enough to hold their own in battle, technically competent and well-supplied
with novel equipment, matter-of-fact about the risks of combat, hairy faced,
four feet tall and called Squats.
'Mancunian'. That's just plain EVIL.
He was an intelligent AOL'er! THEY'RE A PROTECTED SPECIES, DAMMIT!
I think you have repressed feelings toward your mother. You want to have sex with
her and kill you father. My advice is to drink heavily and begin using cocaine. It
worked for me.
[/accent]
I enjoyed it. Baz, eat someone else. Er, only not me.
No, I'm a musician; I can count to 5.
Please don't say I remember something from Star Trek.
I'd trade my left penis to be normal.
*insert comment without any real content here to continue the thread*
Then it stops because I can't think of a worse insult than American.
I have yet to know of a single Californian that knows of the world outside of the San Fernando valley.... "Germans? Aren't they, like, those guys who lived long ago?"
Nothing more warming to a father's heart than to hear his little princess
scream out: "HA HA! I'm Berzerk! DEATHBLOW! Kill the Gobbos! Die you little green savages!"
That's ok, I'm still waiting for the Blood Patch for Xtreme Barbie Lipstick Assault...
No wonder I am an atheist. I cannot blindly follow anything.
A Warhammer troll is a creature which is subject to stupidity and attacks by spewing
forth its vomit. A Usenet troll is identical in both respects.
The newsgroup's own Fluff Nazi League... er, sorry, Fluff People's Collective, or whatever they are calling themselves now,
Just because it's on Usenet doesn't mean it's a personal attack.
He has a lot on his mind, and we all know that's never been a load-bearing structure at the best of times.
Does that mean I have had my heterosexuality confirmed by being omitted from
your address book? Seems like a rather odd way to do it really.
Ghetto style: finding six of your friends to help you roll a pensioner
because you're all too pissweak to manage it on your own. Even with guns.
You use a spell-checker? Ewww, that's a real turn-off, you know.
RGMW. Come in peace, stay in peace, leave in peace. Otherwise leave in pieces.
oh, and i never use caps either. this has no relevance on this subject. I just felt like pointing that out. so there.
Is that a word? And if it is, I bet I spelt it wrong...
America didn't lose the vietnam war.
I died. Which sort of means I don't get to post as much now.
I don't know if it's the blessing, but Gin & Holy Water is fab!
I just checked. I'm still not from Iowa.
He was also rendered deaf in one ear by a
practical joke involving a US artillery piece
I've got a Get Out Of Unwanted Situations Free card.
If it looks like a Troll, smells like a Troll, and says something really fucking dumb, then it's probably a Troll.
I mean, imagine it. A sexually ambiguous redneck with access to almost unlimited supplies of booze.
It's too scary for words.
Bugger off. I've read funnier things in the Watchtower.
Your witty comebacks lack... Wit.
You had better know the quote or I'm taking away your gay license.
I order you not to flame anyone for at least one week. Is that clear?
Not for one week, even if Alec Peters comes back to announce his
engagement to his new life partner ROB.
If your mind was any narrower, the local council would be proposing plans
for a bypass.
Just how does one "run like fuck"? Does it involve a lot of stickiness?
OK, that means I get to try and rape myself.
The server was down for a short while on Monday. (i.e. until I came in on
Tuesday morning and rebooted it.)
Now look here, you arrogant little toerag, I happen to be a step-child
bastard and I will *not* tolerate being compared to WebTV!
I still want to see Hollywood Hogan run for Prez, and then get it. Then
you'd all truly get what you deserve.
Hello, I'd like to say welcome to the group and please die in hell.
I know it's kind of unorthodox and untraditional and all that, but what
the hell - here's a sensible reply.
You're beginning to sound just like Evil Homer. I've yet to decide
whether this is a good or a bad thing.
You'll learn. Think of this group like prison. You only get respect if
you flame someone or become someone's bitch.
Well, to be fair, if GW *hadn't* started making things up out of their
arses all those years ago, this NG wouldn't even exist.
Oh yeah, and the Pope is a black jewish lesbian prostitute from Singapore.
God dammit! Stop trying to turn me on! A female gamer that can program?
I am *not* a prostitute. Not a professional one, anyway.
Doesn't sound any different to any of the newspapers printed here. My
grandmother could proofread better, and she's dead. Except that they tend
to be more of the idiot header variety like "Gays caught in back passage -
Police probe uncovers sex ring".
Is this an private insult-fest, or can anyone join?
#| <-- Jimi's hash pipe
Why do all of my great days now seem to revolve around being allowed to
sleep past 9am?
And kids, don't forget to check out beer once you turn 14. In only four
years time you can drink it legally!
IIRC, the French tend to surrender as soon as they find out that the other
side owns guns.
Sorry, you're wrong there. This *is* my own personal newsgroup, and you
can all lick my boots like the grovelling scum that you are.
Erm... I think you're confusing your career as an evil supervillain
with that of a psychologist.
I read every message of every thread that does not
involve homo/pedi/besti/Bazi-rotica.
[followed by the most gigantic snip since Gargantua's circumcision]
I thought we told you before - no summoning Elder Gods to usenet. It hogs
too much bandwidth...
ObDisclaimer: I am not a smoker. I am, however, an asshole.
It's the mysterious Area 51 of the GW world. It's exact location is a
mystery, as are the activities carried out there. Although GW personnel at
the base have categorically denied that they have the captured,
cryogenically frozen bodies of several Squats in a hidden underground
bunker.
And after the spanking, the... I think I'll wait for the chicks to show up.
Just wondering... considering the way that you did this (along
with your apologizing in the second post) when you sit down at
a table in a resturaunt do you request two plates?
One for each face?
This is bizzare, gay pirate hackers... You could make a movie out of
this.
Just to earn it's tag, this post will now mention the word fellatio.
Thank you.
Warhammer Quest. Definitely the wrong group - we only do homoerotica and
Alladvantage spam here I'm afraid...
And that was a menacing "F*ck with me and you're going to regret it" kind of
heh, just in case you didn't notice...
Finally, has anyone seen or heard anything from Tom Beliech or Jonas
"Originator of the constantly changing sig on RGMW" Whitespore (AKA Crazy
Eddie the Fourth) around lately? Tom was supposed to visit eventually
(probably Gen Con 2000 at this point) and Jonas owes me $9.
No offence taken, but i dont think it has anything to do with brain power
anyway, just the length of the shaft.
Apparently I'm being either fellated or stalked. Maybe both.
With those qualifications, I could be President!
Reality is a long, horrible, on-topic post. And everyone knows on-topic posts
don't exist.
We don't get many trolls here - well, we do, but call them regulars.
Ahhh, this is much better. Personally, I have no idea WTF my IQ is or even
what it means, so I think I'll brag about my dick too. I can also brag
about my arse, so this thread definitely has some potential. Would anyone
like to join the discussion?
I don't mind [OT], but at least make it kinky.
DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed here are solely those of the author's who
doesn't care whether or not you think he is a right wing nut. Please
forgive any spelling and/or grammatical errors for he is also a victim of
the American public education system.
With the shirts I wear, embarrassment is foreign to me...
If the yanks dont like me posting about another shooting incident then
get them to stop shooting people!!
You do have the full range of Demonically Evil add-ons, don't you?
Including Office 97?
They're quite lovable really, unless you happen to be black, Jewish, have
more money than them, or just get in their way ...
We're here for you man. RGMW, the support group for perverts.
Hooray! A real damn argument now! You yanks can shove your guns up your
arse, we're arguing about Dr Who!!
I have no self-esteem, and need to use a large sig to bolster my failing ego.
The British contingent of this NG will have something to say about
life in the US when they finally manage to do something slightly more
useful than carrying the US armed forces luggage to the next third
world smackdown that we deliver.
Of course, RGMW stands for Rogered Guys Moaning and Whining...
I was going to extend this argument, but I went for a piss and
forgot my next paragraph. Damn.
Personal code of honour. I don't do the following:
1) Sleep with dead things, children, or animals.
2) Drink American "beer".
3) Post binaries.
I think we need a "don't ask, don't tell" policy on this NG...
I've got you figured out. You're only in this for the text.
I believe the term you are looking for is " Official RGMW Chocolate-Covered
Skank Ho"
Ooo.. NO YOU WON'T DRAG ME INTO THIS SMUT!!!!!!!!!
But... Could you do that again. This side, this time? And call me
mommy...
But sleeping with dead baby animals is what life is all about!
Unless the exchange rate changes, and Canadian money becomes worth -more- than
Monopoly money.
All innocent and/or sensible persons have 12 hours to leave this NG. After
that, we can no longer guarantee your sanity.
Well, you've just met all the qualifications to be a professional author, in
that you have no qualifications to be an author.
I dunno, he quite enjoys people holding candles up to his perversion, but
the smell of scorched hair is atrocious. :)
It's not silly. You did spell glair wrong. Just because there's no such
word as glair, doesn't mean you didn't spell it wrong...
There actually exists a thread with more than a hundred posts and no
homosexual innuendo. (A scientific viewpoint of the flood) The subject
itself naturally has absolutely nothing to do with GW games, but that
would be asking too much, don't you think.
You're too young for this filth. Go and browse the hardcore porn groups
instead, less chance of you being corrupted...
All hail the wonky Hamster of Doom, Bucktoothed Harbinger of the Apocalypse!
*Vomits* ROBCPW1/AlecPeters/Rec.games.miniatures.warhammer.kinky.sex
.latex.bestiality.corpses.and.even.altar.boys
That is *sooo* cheesy. Didn't I say Codex: God would be full of hyped-up
super-cheese?
Frankly, it looked more legible when I ROT13ed it.
You bastard, leave those words in my mouth alone... They are already
twisted enough...
Actually, for me, fucking is just fine.
All we need are quad combiweapons to solve all of our differences.
Hey, you can't talk to him like that. As a successful lawyer,
astronaut, cabalist, baker, organ donor, gun runner, priest, bookie,
crimefighter, stand up comedian and pro wrestler I can safely say that
if you continue to make slanderous allegations like that I'll be forced
to fly to the US and rape your pets. Twice.
Stop being so goddam polite. I'm trying to start a flame war here.
You mis-spelled "M45T3R H4X0R."
(PS -- how long does the typical thread's title remain valid for,
anyway? I want to see some statistics.)
Jeepers. Maybe somebody should start a newsgroup devoted to GW
miniatures games.
I think we need to start a support group....."Hi, my name is Matt and I
used....AOL."
Oh, come on! You've been here before! You know we don't actually
DISCUSS anything around here. We just trade insults, semi-coherent
rants, off-topic opinions, and snappy .sig lines.
Well, your 'emotional pain' is bleeding all over my carpet.
I'd see a porno flick with Kylie Minogue!!
(Either Kylie in the movie, or Kylie out
sitting on the bed with me. Either interpretation
works just fine as far as I'm concerned...)
I'm glad I stopped by this newsgroup, I've learned so much about
Warhammer.
Mature? Don't you ever accuse us of being that again...
"I know what the rule says, Tuomas, but you *know* what I meant. If I
have to change it I'll have to walk *ALL* the way back up to the
computer doohickey..."
Whoa...we're on topic. What happened?
It's finally happened. My Warhammer hobby has left me homeless and
penniless. My car was repossessed this morning.
I suggest contacting the RTC - but be careful,
they're a funny lot and much given to impaling unbelievers with sharp
pointy things and removing people's heads for the slightest
transgression. Some of them like eating people, too.
I knew that guy at the GW store was looking at me strangely while I was
feeding cheese to the Skaven . . .
Hah! Look out for my lethal commando Nurgling, then.
A Texan AND a Frenchman? Wouldn't that cause some kind of arrogance
singularity, sucking the ego out of everything around it, and causing a
massive personality black hole which made all other topics of conversation
except it's own bloated superego impossible?
Well, if you have Squats, I'm sorry to tell you that these are almost
completely worthless. It seems you can't unload these even if you try
to give 'em away free with other figures. I will do you a HUGE favor,
if you have any, and buy any that you have at $0.50 a pound.
Oh, come now...this NG was never serious. How seriously can you take a
forum that's dedicated to playing outrageously-expensive games with
little plastic and metal soldiers? You can't. Part of the problem here
is that people are taking this way too seriously.
No no no NO. You don't apologise and say something sensible, you're
supposed to now flame everyone and take an outrageous stance on a highly
debated topic.
Hey, I'm not you.
Oh, wait a sec, yes I am.
Well... I chose the Eldar. They are so very color coordinated, and
they have such pretty outfits. And there is the beret of course, and
ritual sodomy. Mmmmmmhhhhh.... ritual sodomy.
This is weird. I had an image of two Marines trying to kick out a
gatecrashing Greater Daemon...
First of all, DIE DIE FUCKING DIE!
Second of all, see the first.
Understands that a game can be named differently between
countries. Marvels at the fact that the UK guys are actually rallying
around this.
When making Shepherd's Pie, try to avoid using real shepherds.
SSSHHHHHH!! I'm busy trying to pick up hot internet chicks, do you mind?
A French wargame? That's a novel concept. What do you do, see who can drop
their weapons the fastest, run for cover and surrender??
Now that I got the Steering Wheel patch, my car hardly ever
crashes. Waddaya mean it was supposed to COME with one...?
Anal cigarettes? Yeeeow.
So, in a way, it is worth the money (I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS).
I find that bulldog clips are indispensable. Being immune to Tippex,
they can start shredding paper / pinning writing implements from the
first turn. Of course, they have to watch out for that bloody blu-tack,
though.
A "Version-change" (similar to a sex change but more painful)
If this childish patriotic/religious/intolerant nonsense doesn't stop
right now, NOBODY's going to heaven. Catch my drift? Good.
Certainly, sir. Today's speciality is liquified redneck with diced Alec
Peters. We also have ROB marinaded in its own bullshit, and raw
Thrasher delicately sprinkled with Al-Hussein(TM) anthrax spores. Might
I recommend the Evil Homer(TM) Shredded Newbie for dessert. All served
with a side-salad of chopped Comizzar and Phoenixflare.
Codex: Leman Russ Right Sponson Heavy Bolter Ammo Hopper Third Shell
Down From the Top, painted Green and Named Richard by the Tank
Commander.
It almost appears as if this festering pit of filth has degenerated into
a semi-respectable on-topic newsgroup. Say it isn't so.
HA! I just killfiled god!
Pompous know it all: Someone who doesn't think 100 is a high number for
an IQ.
You're thinking of the soon-to-be-released battlefield sewing kit surely
(RRP £15). Including quick release zip pockets allowing GW quick access
to your wallet and a free bottle of Citadel Colour T-shirt dye (contains
only enough to dye 75% of your shirt, so you must buy another (RRP £10).
Transfers will also be sold separately (£5 each), and then there's the
official GW needle set (boxed set of 5 sewing needles £25) - only shirts
which have been modified using official GW needles and accessories will
be allowed into official GW stores/events.
Better than being anally raped by a moose and living.
3. I've also heard that Jews are trying to take over the world. I'm
busted on this one. I'm working independantly on the problem, however,
and none of my family members (to the best of my knowledge) are
attempting world domination.
ObDisclaimer: I hear Tom Clancy interviews sailors before he writes a
book. Said sailors must be having a great laugh at his expense right
now.
Bobbies. How can anyone be afraid of anything named "Bobbies"?
A great deal of people on this NG are stupid kids who think they have
the world figured out. The rest are stupid adults who think they have
the world figured out . . .
Before start I'd like to say that the word "Sex" was included in the title
merely to get more people to read this.
ROBCPW1 is a fucking you.
Oops, disregard that stylish pun. I've just realised that it sounds like an
Italianised warning of an attack upon the readers person...
Gotta love it when someone with a .fi at the end of their address has
better English skills than someone with a .uk at the end of theirs...
At last!! Someone else who uses the term "darkies"!!! I thought it was
dead long ago. *wipes tear from eye* ah, that reminds me of my childhood -
my grandfather ranting on about niggers and spics and krauts, and the rest
of my family saying, "Yes, well, erm, quite. Did you see that programme on
BBC 2?"
Actually, Roboute was writing the Codex, and he needed to make sure it
was up to scratch. So, for the entire Heresy, he had the whole *legion*
parading up and down on Ultramar, repainting their armour, parading,
designing laurel wreaths, parading, building statues to the Emperor,
parading - oh, and partaking of the traditional Ultramarine ritual of
group sodomy. Repeatedly. In companies. On the parade ground. In
formation.
I'm probably an illiterate idiot, yet you seem to have a hard time accepting the Vietnam war as lost
(irregeradless of whether it was), rendering the above statement about you true. Again; unless I'm
an illiterate idiot, which I probably am.
You can't make an omelette without breaking Jervis^Weggs.
You backpedal so much that I just have to unzip and not have to chase your furry arse down.
No. I have something special planned for McVey; a death connected to
his sin... we'll feed him ever Lemartes miniature in the place.
Damn straight!
Let's capture all the studio. Tie them to chairs.
"Now, Mr. McVey. Ve have a few questions to ask you..."
"Ah. Mr. Priestly. So nice of you to join us?"
"Do you expect me to talk?"
"No, Mr. Woods. I expect you to die...."
Is he trying to say that Faith In Christ will get people laid in the
afterlife? That's a new take on it.
GO: No, no, really, they're, um, well, they're... Rizla papers, that's
what they are! Oh yes.
FI: Oh yes?
GO: (Begins frantically rolling top secrets documents) Oh yes. Got a
light?
Damn you Bourbon! Damn you straight to hell!
Well, not *straight* to hell... (gulp)
Here is a universal Chaos Motto:
Trying to overthrow the Imperium for 10,000 years, and still haven't
gotten it right.
Suddenly, there was a great lurch in the space time continuum, as
every member of RGMW lost their lunch.
Actually, it's been proven that 80% of RGMW are complicated AI programs.
19% are overweight, balding white men who never leave their homes.
The remaining 1% are clueless newbies and/or trolls.
BTW, this is the true reason for the Horus Heresy: the Loyalist were
into opera and ballet, and the heretics were into musicals.
Perhaps he knows a HUGE Harley-Biker kinda guy covered in tattoos,
several randomly-placed body-piercings, shaved head and red goatee!
Wearing leather, wrapped in chains, and smoking a ceegar!
"Where's that bitch Alec Peters? Joe Schulte's the name, sodomizing's
the game!"
I think it should go to
rec.bloody.scientists.showing.off.their.'A'.grade.at.physics.A.level, to
be honest ...
Okay, kiddies, I'm starting to feel sorry for the pathetic, child
molesting, UET afflicted dork. We've got to leave him *one* of his
illusions.
However, we will stop sending orders to people who insist on "group
hugs" as part of a (quickly decided) company policy.
You missed a FUCKING between THIS & NEWSGROUP.
Still, I think the IG could use a combat engineer corps. They should be tough
enough to hold their own in battle, technically competent and well-supplied
with novel equipment, matter-of-fact about the risks of combat, hairy faced,
four feet tall and called Squats.
'Mancunian'. That's just plain EVIL.
He was an intelligent AOL'er! THEY'RE A PROTECTED SPECIES, DAMMIT!