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[seasleep]

lying in bed trying to fall asleep for two hours before returning to work at midnight, i get up, grab pen & paper, felt it urgent to write down every name of every death i've seen so far- those that i can remember. maybe in this, i'll expell some of the exhaust i've been inhaling. there is too much dust on my hands these days, i'm getting worn

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[svaty]

call me if you wanna talk about anything and you aren't dead tired. i stayed home this weekend. i am not making any attempts at contact with either of those men. i have to wait till i run into B again before anything can be cleared up. i'm not going to say another word about any of it to our mutual friends, except for ben. i was talking to my conservative friend again tonight at work and he's just full of good advice about everything. so nice to hear a new perspective. i'm worried that i won't be able to write once i do finally get that laptop. someone is supposed to call and help me find one this week. i hate waiting around for calls.

oh and BTW -- you saved me once. or twice. <#<#<####