Hunter x Hunter Character in CD Series - Vol. 3 - Hisoka
Here’s the translation! kusarihime-chan, I’m really so sorry I made you wait for so long! m(_ _)m I hope you’ll enjoy it~
I’m not a native speaker of neither Japanese nor English, thus there may be mistakes. Any corrections are very welcome!
As the theme of this volume is TV, there is a lot of references to various Japanese TV shows. Unfortunately some of them were lost on me, but I added footnotes for the ones I actually understood. Again, any help/explanations welcome! :D
Also, about the numerous crazy names and ideas for TV shows - the Japanese TV is in fact just like this (save for the killing part, maybe). ^_^;;
Anyone who’d like to use this translation for any purpose - feel free to do so, though I'd be happy if you gave me credit. ^_^
So, onto the stuff:
♪ Hunter x Hunter Character in CD Series - Vol. 3 - Hisoka ♪
Track 1: For the next project, maybe let’s go with this...
Killua: Argh, it will be 5 o’ clock soon! We’re waiting for an hour already, dammit!
Gon: Cause the president is careless about time, you know...
Leorio: But it was his own idea to hold a project meeting!
Kurapika: As always, he has no ability for adapting socially... It’s unbelievable that he’s actually working as the president!
Leorio: Exactly!
Gon: But since he’s the president, he’s the big person here!
Killua: But it’s an hour already!
Leorio: Exactly!
Kurapika: Why do we always have to end up being manipulated by him!
Leorio: Exactly!
Gon: Ah, it’s an octopus! [1]
Leorio: Exactly!... Huh?
Everyone: Character in CD - Hunter x Hunter, Volume 3!
Hisoka: TV Hisoka...
Hisoka: One... Sipping all the blood out of a living being. Two... Committing every wicked evil deed. Three... Find and cut into pieces. Four... Cut into pieces in a back street. Five... Always cut into pieces. Six...
Mito: Excuse me, president... President!
Hisoka: ...Cut into pieces over there. Seven... Cut into pieces diagonally. Eight, cut into pieces after all, nine, cut into pieces even here.
Mito: President!
Hisoka: Ten, and finally ah, everyone is killed. Heheheh... [2] For the next project, maybe let’s go with this. The title will be “Momo-Hisoka-Zamurai”. [3] Hmm, it doesn’t sound right... “Hisoka-Momo-Zamurai”. “Momotarou-Hisoka”. No, something doesn’t click here...
Mito: President!!
Hisoka: Hm, what is it? Talented but not at all eager to work overtime, my secretary Mito-kun.
Mito: Please say that after you pay me for the overtime work.
Hisoka: Hahaha... You say such amusing things.
Mito: (to herself) Not at all amusing, you old man!
Hisoka: Then, what is it about?
Mito: Oh, right! Well... in fact it’s about your outfit, president.
Hisoka: My outfit? Violet shirt and white trousers, a lemon-colored sweater wrapped around my shoulders and a shiny silver watch on my arm. Anything wrong about it?
Mito: Are you going to appear on -chan’s Costume Grand-Prix, or what? [4]
Hisoka: I’ll cut your salary.
Mito: Ahhh! It’s not true, it’s just a joke! As expected from the all-popular young president of TV Hisoka, oh so cool!
Hisoka: Hmph. I’m troubled because of tasteless people like this. So, have all my useless subordinates gathered?
Everyone: Aahh!
Hisoka: Good morning, everyone.
Leorio: It’s not a “good morning”, president!
Hisoka: What?
Gon: Listen, it’s not morning now, so a “good morning” sounds weird, doesn’t it?
Kurapika: No, it’s not quite the point...
Hisoka: Gon, it’s cute you’re so naive. In the industry, no matter if it’s morning, noon or night, it’s always a “good morning”.
Gon: Eh, really?
Hisoka: So even if you’re late, a “good morning” is okay.
Kurapika & Leorio: This is wrong.
Hisoka: Let’s make a note. A salary cut for those who contradict what I say.
Kurapika & Leorio: Good morning, president Hisoka!
Hisoka: Yes, yes, now it’s okay. Did you understand too, Gon?
Gon: Yessir!
Hisoka: So, let’s start the project meeting. Oh, before that... Say, Kura-chan.
Kurapika: Kura-chan!?...
Hisoka: About that daytime drama series, no one dies in it! Couldn’t you make it like, more whish [5] and boom?
Kurapika: I don’t really understand the meaning of “whish and boom”, but it’s a pure love story, so it’s impossible.
Hisoka: Make it more violent.
Kurapika: Ehh? But it was your own plan, the love story!
Leorio: Calm down, Kurapika, he’s the president!
Kurapika: But!...
Gon: Hm? What happened, Kurapika? Kurapika?
Hisoka: Hey hey, let’s not call each other unrespectfully! [6] We have to be more friendly.
Gon: Friendly?
Hisoka: That’s right. This way we’ll be more like friends, won’t we? Kura-chan, Gon-chan - it’s common sense of the industry.
Gon: Oh, I see, Hiso-chan!
Hisoka: Me, you call “president”.
So, I’m opening the meeting. Mito-kun... no, Mii-chan, could you pass out the materials?
Mito: Yes! I wish he stopped with the sudden “Mii-chan”.
Here you are, everybody.
Kurapika: Thank you very much.
Hisoka: Hmm... Well, many things are written here, but in short, I want you to come up with a daring plan, which will become a leading idea for the industry.
Leorio: Huh.
Kurapika: A daring plan, huh...
Gon: Me, me! How about a fishing show? “Gon’s Anyone-can-do-it Easy Fishing Lesson”.
Hisoka: It sounds kind of common...
Gon: Not at all! We’ll aim to catch the Lord of the Pond, which no one has caught before! [7]
Kurapika: Then it will become a No-one-can-do-it Difficult Fishing Lesson, won’t it?
Gon: Umm...
Leorio: No no, such a plain idea is no good! Let’s gather a bunch of girls in bikinis and make a fancy show. Its name will be “All Night Hisoka”.
Kurapika & Killua: Vulgar...
Leorio: What!?
Hisoka: I’d rather have boys... ehm. Such unrefined shows don’t interest me.
Leorio:
Hisoka: I’d like to have something that will grab the hearts of common people. For example...
Leorio: For example?
Hisoka: Frankly... “Violent in the Afternoon Intensive Hisoka”.
[1] ...Or so I think he’s saying? ^_^; It’s a pun - cause Leorio keeps on saying “exactly” (mattaku da), Gon makes fun of him, saying something that only sounds similar but makes no sense: A, tako da! (“it’s an octopus”).
[2] This is also a play on words, as each sentence starts with the same syllable(s) as the corresponding number, e.g. ITSUtsu - ITSUdemo kirikizami, MUttsu - MUkou de kirikizami. As far as I know, this is a kind of a traditional Japanese counting rhyme, and I’m familiar with a few songs which use it. If anyone happens to be more knowledgeable on this, I’d love to hear about it!
[3] This is a reference to a classic Japanese historical TV drama from the late ‘70s, called “Momotarou-Zamurai”. The first two verses of Hisoka’s counting rhyme are actually a quote from it (the rest is purely Hisoka’s invention, I presume ^_^;). I guess the reference came about because the name of the then-famous actor who played Momotarou-Zamurai is Takahashi Hideki, and Hisoka’s seiyuu’s name is Takahashi Hiroki - they’re even written with almost the same kanji (高橋英樹 and 高橋広樹).
[4] A reference to a TV show called “Kin-chan & Katori Shingo's All Japan Costume Grand Prix” (“Kin-chan & Katori Shingo no Zen Nihon Kasou Taishou”), on which amateur guests perform skits. Most probably Hisoka’s outfit references to it in some way too.
[5] Supposedly a sound effect of cutting. ^_^;
[6] Yobisute literally means calling someone by his first name only, which in Japan can be regarded as both disrespectful/offensive or affectionate, depending on the situation.
[7] The huge fish which Gon caught on Whale Island at the beginning of HxH.
Track 2: “Violent in the Afternoon Intensive Hisoka” [1]
Hisoka: Hello. I’m Hiso Monta. [2] So today as usual we will provide advice to girls from all over the country. Hello? Lady?
Mito: Hello! I’m the beautiful and brave madam, Mito!
Hisoka: You’re not worrying for real, are you? Goodbye.
Hello.
Mito: Hey, please don’t hang up all of a sudden! I’m worrying so much I can’t even eat properly!
Hisoka: Okay, okay. So, what happened?
Mito: In fact, my son Gon has lately reached the rebellious age...
Hisoka: The rebellious age? It’s a common thing, so give up. Goodbye.
Hello?
Mito: As I said, don’t hang up suddenly!
Hisoka: Even if you say so...
Mito: Gon used to listen obediently to what I say! But now... ah, now!...
Hisoka: Ah, I get it, I understand. There’s nothing else to do here, but give up. Part with him. Goodbye.
Hello?
Mito: Do you even have any will to do it? I...
Hisoka: Hello?
Mito: Don’t mess with me, you damn?
Hisoka: Hel? [3]
Mito: If you don’t cut this out, I’ll beat the crap out of y--
Hisoka: He? [4]
Mito: [5]
Hisoka: How was it?
Leorio: Well, even if you ask...
Kurapika: The intensive phone thing is okay, but...
Hisoka: You have complaints? Let’s make a note. Leori-chan and Kura-chan...
Leorio: It’s superb! We don’t have any complaints!
Hisoka: Good. So, we’ll adopt this idea. Next...
Everyone: Hmm?
Mito: It’s 5 o’clock! Which means I’ll be going now, so goodbye~
Hisoka: Hey, wait, you!...
Leorio: Ahh, she just left on her own...
Hisoka: Honestly, that’s no good. She’s been making light of the work since the beginning anyway... Oh? Excuse me for a moment. Hello? Ah, it’s you. Hmm... Ah, I’m in the middle of a meeting now. Eh? Right now? Such a bad boy, you are. I got it.
Now, all of you. Take a break.
Everyone: Ehhh?
Killua: We’ve only just started the discussion!
Hisoka: No no, it’s not good to overwork yourself. So, a break now.
Leorio: Wait, president!
Killua: What’s this supposed to mean!
Gon: Hey, wait!
Kurapika: In the end... the one who’s making light of the work the most is the president...
[1] In Japanese: “Gogo wa Mouretsu Omoikkiri Hisoka”; a reference to a show called “Omoikkiri Terebi”.
[2] The above show is hosted by a comedian called Mino Monta.
[3] In Japanese, when you pick up the phone you say moshi moshi. Hisoka only says one moshi this time.
[4] Then he only says mo.
[5] Can’t make out what she’s saying here. ^_^;
Track 3: I’ll give him a piece of my mind!
Leorio: Damn~ I don’t like it in the least bit!
Kurapika: Your words exactly!
Killua: Maybe I should go home...
Gon: You can’t! It will be a problem if you get fired!
Kurapika: That’s true, but!...
Leorio: Enough is enough, I can’t stand it anymore! I should give him a piece of my mind here and now!
Killua: For real?
Leorio: Of course!
Gon: You’re so cool, Leorio!
Leorio: Hahah, just leave it to me!
Hisoka: What are you leaving?
Leorio: That is, of course...
Everyone: Ahhhh!
Leorio: Pre-pre-president!
Gon: You-you-you surprised us!
Kurapika: Where on Earth did you come out from!?
Hisoka: By any chance... are you speaking bad of me behind my back?
Kurapika: Hey, give him a piece of your mind, Leorio!
Killua: That’s right!
Gon: Go! Good luck!
Leorio: Allright. Hey! Hisoka! President!... Of course we’re not speaking bad of you...
Ah, president, you have a speck of dust on your shoulder... Ahh...
Hisoka: What is this vulgar noise?
Leorio: Well, it will be time for supper soon...
Gon: Ah, come to think of it, I’m hungry too...
Hisoka: That’s how it is. So, let’s continue our meeting while enjoying a laem.
Gon: Laem?
Hisoka: Gon-chan, a trendy businessman uses words skillfully. A meal is a laem, a woman is a namow. [1]
Gon: Ehh?
Killua: No one uses it anymore now!
Kurapika: This is embarrassing...
Hisoka: Then, what do you want to eat?
Gon: Hmm... A steak! No, I mean... a kaets!
Hisoka: Good! It’s my treat. Let’s go!
Gon: Yay! Og stel for a laem!
Leorio: Ah, thank you so much, president!
Hisoka: Ah, the rest of you pay for yourselves.
Everyone: Ehh?
Kurapika: Picking favorites!
Killua: Picking favorites!
Leorio: Picking favorites!
Gon: Kill-chan! The president says he will treat you too, if you ask him!
Killua: Yay! But let’s stop with “Kill-chan”!
Leorio: Dammit! Why only we have to pay for ourselves?
Kurapika: Wait... I have a feeling that if you get a treat from president Hisoka, fearsome things come afterwards...
Leorio: That’s for sure, but!...
Hisoka: Hey! The two on your own budget, hurry up and let’s go! To the most luxurious, very expensive place.
Leorio & Kurapika: Nnnngh...
[1] In Japanese, he reverses the order of the syllables, changing meshi into shime, and onna into naon. This was an actual trend in Japan btw, sometime in the ‘90s if I remember correctly.
Track 4: ...It’s a secret.
Waitress: Welcome! Have you decided on your order?
Gon: I’ll have a sirloin steak course! Oh...
Everyone: Mito-san!...
Hisoka: What are you doing?
Mito: It’s not hard to guess, isn’t it? It’s my part-time job.
Killua: Part-time?
Leorio: Wasn’t it forbidden at our TV station?
Mito: The monthly pay is dirt cheap, so I can’t make a living if I don’t do this. It’s a secret.
Hisoka: It’s not a thing to say to the president.
Mito: Oh, my bad... Please place your orders!
Hisoka: Honestly. I’ll have the same thing as Gon.
Killua: Me too! A sirloin is okay.
Mito: Okay. How about you two?
Leorio & Kurapika: Ramen.
Mito: Ehm. This is a super high-class restaurant, so this kind of order is a bit...
Leorio: Then, ramen rice!
Mito: We don’t have it.
Kurapika: Then, we’ll just have the cheapest thing on the menu. That’s so woeful...
Mito: I got it. Just how poor are they?
Hisoka: Now, before the enjoyable laem, will you listen to the idea I just came up with?
Leorio: He’ll just say some good-for-nothing plan again...
Hisoka: How about a duel between chefs? Named “Iron Hisoka”. [1]
Killua: Exactly so...
Kurapika: Not quite what you call exciting...
Hisoka: Kill-chan, Kura-chan. You wanna pay for yourselves?
Killua: “Iron Hisoka” is the best!
Kurapika: I’m paying for myself anyway...
Hisoka: The greatest chefs from all around the world will kill each other on the ring, causing a huge commotion like a great wind. Good, that’s really good!
Leorio: Wait a moment, Hisoka! I mean, president... If it’s on the ring, the competitors don’t necessarily have to be chefs, do they?
Hisoka: It’s original, isn’t it?
Kurapika: It certainly is, but...
Killua: Hey, if it’s got to be a food thing, how about this?
Kurapika: What, Killua?
Killua: Little kids will prepare dishes for their very first time, and the president will eat them. The title will be... “Hisoka is eating this”! [2]
Everyone:
Hisoka: But... if little kids prepare it, what will it taste like?
Killua: Ultimately bad!
Hisoka: Rejected.
Killua: Ehh--!?
Kurapika: Hey, everybody, maybe we should move away from the topic of food a bit?...
Leorio: But food, animals, and girls in swimsuits are the three golden keys for increasing viewership.
Kurapika: Leave the girls out too.
Leorio: Hmm... Then, how about this? A detective drama called “Cry for the Great Investigation of Dancing Hisoka. The Intensive Chapter”. [3]
[1] In Japanese “Hisoka no Tetsujin”; a parody of a cooking competition show “Ryouri no Tetsujin” (“Iron Chef”).
[2] Probably a parody again, though unknown to me. In Japanese, “Hisoka ga Taberumon”.
[3] In Japanese “Odoru Hisoka no Daisousasen ni Hoero, Mouretsu Hen”; a parody of a famous detective TV series called “Odoru Daisousasen” (literally, “Great Dancing Criminal Investigation”).
Track 5: “Cry for the Great Investigation of Dancing Hisoka. The Intensive Chapter”
Leorio: Hello, cop sergeant speaking. What!? A murder!? I got it!
Gon, Killua, Kurapika: Sergeant!
Leorio: A dead body has been found in the station building! Their chest was pierced with a sharp tool!
Hisoka: It’s probable that it was “that” killer.
Killua: Damn... I won’t forgive him!
Kurapika: Exactly!
Gon: Sergeant, we’ll go to the scene of the crime asap!
Leorio: Okay! Painted-white, Wise Kid, Queer, Fish Pond! Please go to the scene of the crime!
Everyone: Roger!... ehhm...
Leorio: What’s with you? Quick, go to the scene of the crime.
Kurapika: What was this supposed to mean, just now?
Leorio: What do you mean?
Killua: Painted-white, Wise Kid and stuff?
Leorio: Ahh. These are nicknames, an essential for every cop.
Everyone: What kind of nicknames are these!?
Gon: I don’t want to be a fish pond!
Hisoka: Painted-white is too blatant, isn’t it? If you have to say it, at least phrase it as Snow White. [1]
Killua: Who are you calling a wise kid cop?
Kurapika: What do you mean by queer?
Leorio: It’s easy to understand, so isn’t it good? How about Second Block then? [2]
Kurapika, Gon, Killua: It’s not good!
Leorio: I get it! It’ll be okay if I do it from scratch, right? Take two, start!
Leorio: Leorio: Hello, cop sergeant speaking. What!? A murder!? I got it!
Gon, Killua, Kurapika: Sergeant!
Leorio: A dead body has been found in the station building! Their chest was pierced with a sharp tool!
Hisoka: It’s probable that it was “that” killer.
Killua: Damn... I won’t forgive him!
Kurapika: Exactly!
Gon: Sergeant, we’ll go to the scene of the crime asap!
Leorio: Okay! Weird one, cheeky one, womanly one, small one! Please go to the scene of the crime!
Everyone:
Leorio: Oh? What happened to you? Go to the scene of the crime!
Everyone: Stop messing with us!
Leorio: Agh! Then, what am I supposed to do?
Kurapika: We’ll choose our nicknames by ourselves. We can’t leave it to you.
Gon, Killua, Hisoka: No objections!
Leorio: Honestly, you’re nothing but trouble! Alright, let’s have it your way! Write it down on this script.
Everyone: Alright!
Leorio: Okay! So I’m going again. Take three, start!
Leorio: Leorio: Hello, cop sergeant speaking. What!? A murder!? I got it!
Gon, Killua, Kurapika: Sergeant!
Leorio: A dead body has been found in the station building! Their chest was pierced with a sharp tool!
Hisoka: It’s probable that it was “that” killer.
Killua: Damn... I won’t forgive him!
Kurapika: Exactly!
Gon: Sergeant, we’ll go to the scene of the crime asap!
Leorio: Okay! Handsome guy! Handsome guy! Handsome guy! [3] Gon! Please go to the scene of the...! Wait a moment!
Killua: What is it again? I was just in the right mood to go to the scene of the crime, you know.
Kurapika: Exactly.
Hisoka: What an ugly man.
Leorio: Be quiet! What is this “handsome guy” business?
Hisoka: What can I say...
Leorio: First of all, if you three have the same name, what are you going to do about it? There will be trouble if someone calls you!
Gon: I have a different name from the rest, so there’s no problem, is it?
Leorio: There is, and a big one! It’s your real name, isn’t it!
Gon: But...
Leorio: No buts! Honestly, every one of you!... I’ve had it! Let’s put the nicknames on hold! Anyway, we’re going to the crime scene!
Everyone: Roger!
Leorio: So this is the deceased...
Kurapika: Yes. Using her license, we managed to confirm her identity. It’s Mito-san from Whale Island, 19 years old.
Everyone: ...19 years old!?
Leorio: Hey, say what you like, but that is not possible...
Killua: Even when it comes to manipulating figures to one’s advance, there are limits!
Hisoka: True... Trying to reduce your age by 10 years, I think this is kinda...
Kurapika: No, it’s some 20 years we’re talking here...
Mito: Rude, aren’t you all!
Everyone: Ehh?
Mito: I’m 19 years old! Leave it at that!
Gon: Mito-san?...
Killua: The dead body talked, just now...
Leorio: Forget about it. Did you find any clues, Gon?
Gon: Yes, sergeant! There’s a message from before the victim’s death left here!
Leorio: What!?
Kurapika: It’s true. There are some characters written here.
Hisoka: These are letters written in blood! Mi, ku, to... Mikuto?
Gon: Hey, what does it mean?
Killua: Beats me.
Leorio: What did this victim want to convey?...
Everyone: Hmmm...
Kurapika: I got it.
Leorio: Oh, as expected from Kurapika!
Kurapika: Firstly, “mi” is the “mi” from “hi, fu mi” [4] - in other words, the number three.
Hisoka: Ahh, I see!
Kurapika: Then “ku”, by the same logic, means the number nine.
Leorio: And that means...?
Gon: 39, right?
Killua: And the last one, “to”?...
Kurapika: When you look at the deceased’s fingers, doesn’t it look like she meant to write something more after the “to”?...
Hisoka: Now when I look at it...
Kurapika: Probably something like “to... shima”.
Killua: “To... shima”... “Toshima”... Ah-hah, I got it!
Everyone: I am Toshima, 39 years old!
Leorio: Okay, we’ve solved the case! Everyone, let’s go home!
Mito: Don’t go!
Kurapika: This dead body again...
Mito: You, you!... The meaning of this message is: “Mi” for “Mito-san”, “ku” for “becoming dizzy”, “to” for “very beautiful”! [5]
Everyone:
Killua: This is not even a dying message!
Mito: Be quiet!
Leorio: How’s that for you? Interesting, isn’t it?
Kurapika: Leorio...
Hisoka: Boring. Rejected.
Leorio: No way...
Mito: Sorry to keep you waiting! Three sirloin steak courses, and a bit broiled cheap piece of sinewy meat, without rice.
Gon, Killua: Yay!
Hisoka: Let’s eat before it get’s cold. So...
Hisoka, Gon, Killua: I’m digging in!
Kurapika: I’m digging in... It’s hard...
Leorio: I still think it was interesting, “Cry for the Great Investigation of Dancing Hisoka. The Intensive Chapter”...
Kurapika: It’s over, Leorio, just give up...
Gon:
Killua: Don’t sleep, Gon!
Gon: But after you eat a meal...
Leorio: You have it good, you two. You can’t fill your stomach with a piece of sinewy meat...
Kurapika: True.
Hisoka: Okay, end of the meal break. So, shall we start?
Everyone: Roger...
Hisoka: Now... I’ll need you to prove you’re not actually useless. Give me your plans, one after another!
Leorio: Hmm... then...
Kurapika: How about a school story?
Gon: A school story?
Killua: Ah, this might be good! Lately it’s been popular in other TV stations too.
Hisoka: I see...
[1] Okay, he says bihaku, which means “beautiful white”, but I just couldn’t help myself. XD
[2] Nichoume, a reference to Shinjuku-nichoume, a part of the Shinjuku district in Tokyo, famous for its gay culture (apparently, there’s the world's highest concentration of gay bars there!).
[3] They use the word nimaime, which originally means the actor second after the lead, who in Japanese traditional kabuki plays usually played the role of a beautiful lover. Because of that, this word is used today to describe a handsome man.
[4] One of the two Japanese numbering systems (the same one which was used at [2] from Track 1).
[5] When put together: Mito-san wa kurakura suru hodo tottemo kirei - “Mito-san is so very beautiful it makes you dizzy”. ^_^;
Track 6: “School drama: Farewell, Youth”
Leorio: Hey hey, be quiet, all of you! Today’s lesson ends here, so go home, don’t fool around! Of course, do your homework properly too!
Everyone:
Leorio: Haha, don’t trouble your teacher! So lastly, I’ll collect the lunch money now, okay?
Killua: Teacher!
Leorio: What is it, Killua?
Killua: My bag with the lunch money... It’s gone!
Leorio: Haven’t you dropped it somewhere?
Killua: Impossible, it was here just a moment ago!
Leorio: Okay, everyone be quiet! When did it disappear?
Killua: The sixth period was P.E., right? It was after that.
Leorio: I don’t know what to do... For now, everyone else, check if you have your lunch money!
Gon: Ah! Mine is gone too!
Kurapika: Ahh, mine too!... Why in the world am I playing the role of a schoolgirl?
Leorio: Haha... We have a problem. Is it all of you?
Kurapika: It seems that only Hisoka-san didn’t have his money stolen!
Leorio: Hisoka, you’re expelled.
Hisoka: Ehh? I don’t know anything about it!
Gon: But it’s weird that only you weren’t robbed!
Hisoka: It wasn’t me!
Killua: We need a proof. Give me your bag.
Hisoka: What are you doing!
Killua: Give it! Ah! Look, it’s here!
Hisoka: Oh, no!...
Leorio: So you are guilty! That’s no good!
Hisoka: It must be some mistake! I didn’t steal anything.
Killua: Then how will you explain this?
Hisoka: It’s someone else’s prank!
Killua: What are you saying?
Leorio: Okay, I get it! I will check it thoroughly. Everyone, close your eyes! Okay? Be honest with your teacher! Raise your hand! I won’t tell anyone else.
Good! Your teacher is happy! Okay, everyone, open your eyes!
Gon: Who was the criminal?
Leorio: Hahaha! It’s Hisoka!
Hisoka: Ehh?
Gon, Killua: So it was you after all!
Kurapika: You’re the worst!
Hisoka: Wait a moment! I didn’t raise my hand! And you said you won’t tell anyone, anyway!
Leorio: I’m not good with difficult stuff! If you’re the criminal, then it all ends well. Hahaha!
Hisoka: This is wrong!
Track 7: There’s no TV show about hot springs, right?
Hisoka: Hey, teacher Leorio!... I mean, Leori-chan!
Leorio: What?
Hisoka: No salary for you for the next three months.
Leorio: Why so!? It was fiction!
Hisoka: If you have complaints... I’m taking out my notepad, taking out my pen, writing: “Leorio, fired, fired, fired”...
Leorio: Ahh! It’s a lie! It was just a joke! Oh right, I forgot one thing. Hot springs! There’s no TV show about hot springs, right?
Hisoka: Hot springs?
Kurapika: Now when you mention it, it’s true...
Gon: Haha! I like hot springs!
Hisoka: I see. I’ll take it!
Leorio: Right? Right?
Hisoka: So, let’s go.
Everyone: Huh?
Hisoka: Let’s go.
Kurapika: Go where?
Hisoka: To the hot springs.
Everyone: Ehh--
Gon: Yay!
Kurapika: Now?
Hisoka: Yes. To make a good TV show, you need to collect materials.
Killua: Don’t you just want to go to hot springs?
Hisoka: Not at all. Okay, let’s go, Gon! I’ll pay for you and Kill-chan. The rest pay for themselves.
Leorio: Again?
Kurapika: I have 8000 Jeni left...
Hisoka: Then... I said it, but which hot springs would be good?
Kurapika: How about making some plans at least?
Leorio: You’re so right.
Killua: Ah! The bus is here.
Gon: Wow, it’s our bus, it’s our bus!
Leorio: Don’t get high like a kid!
Gon: But I am a kid.
Hisoka: So, let’s get on, everybody.
Mito: Okay, okay, hurry up! Don’t be slow!
Everyone: Mito-san!
Gon: What are you doing?
Mito: Of course it’s a part-time job! A driver gets paid quite well!
Hisoka: Really, how many of these are you doing at the same time?
Mito: This is a sec-ret.
Leorio: She’s even more greedy for money than I am. [1]
Gon: Ahh! My ekiben! [2]
Killua: It’s mine!
Gon: No, you wanted the Hokkaido special one, didn’t you, Kill-chan!
Leorio: Be quiet!
Kurapika: Where did you buy such thing anyway? This is Izu-kyuu Shimoda line.
Leorio: I don’t really care, but this is some kind of a locality problem, isn’t it?
Hisoka: Ah... This is sudden, but I came up with an idea for a show. A train murder mystery.
Gon: I found out who is the murderer! Indeed, if you go to Akabane like this, it may be impossible time-wise, but if you get off in Kita-Senju, get on the express from the Toubu-Isesaki line and go all the way to Kasukabe... Then you change to the Noda Line...
Killua: No, rather than that, if you go by Seibu-Ikebukuro line and get off in Akitsu, then walk to Shin-Akitsu...
Gon: That’s some walking there though...
Killua: True, I wish they’d do something about it!
Gon: Besides, when you set your feet on the platform, the Musashino line departs the very same moment! [3]
Leorio: ...As I said, the local talk is no good! It’s not like the train maniacs make small talk with each other anyway!
Hisoka: Is it really no good?...
Leorio: Because no one will understand this, besides people from one part of the Kanto region! [4] It-is-no-good!
Mito: How about a lunch, some tea, or souvenirs?
Everyone: Ahh--!
Gon: Mito-san!
Hisoka: You should cut it out.
Mito: Since the monthly pay is low...
Killua: Is it really because of that?...
Gon: Ahh! My exclusive Hunter Airlines lunchbox!
Killua: I’m telling you it’s mine!
Gon: Noo! Yours is the curry set here, isn’t it, Kill-chan!
Leorio: As I’ve told you, be quiet!
Kurapika: More importantly... why are we on a plane?
Mito: Thank you for choosing Hunter Airlines today.
Hisoka: Honestly, I don’t even feel like being surprised anymore...
Kurapika: Exactly...
Hisoka: Phew... By the way, I thought about another plan again.
Hisoka: Hahaha... I hijacked this plane. I’ll need you to obey me now.
Mito: Excuse me, sir...
Hisoka: I told you to obey, didn’t I? Otherwise...
Mito: No, I mean.. It won’t move until you put a 100 yen coin in.
Gon: Old man, move over now, I wanna ride this airplane!
Hisoka: The punchline here is, in fact this was a toy plane on the roof of a department store.
Leorio: Hard to understand...
Kurapika: Besides, it’s not a show, it’s only a skit...
Gon: Ahh! Ahh! My... ahh... Hey Killua, what is the specialty of a ship?
Killua: No idea.
Kurapika: There is a more important question than this! Why are we on a ship!? Where are we being taken to!?
Mito: Ladies and gentlemen, our ship will soon... Oh, that was a big wave. The starboard is full.
Everyone: Ahhh!
Leorio: What kind of part-time job are you doing anyway!?
[1] He says kane no mouja, the famous insult which Kurapika said to him when they met during the Hunter exam. :D
[2] A special boxed lunch which you can buy on a train or on a train station; many of them contain local specialties and are exclusive for a given region.
[3] I guess all this talk is comprehensible only to someone who’s lived in Tokyo and is familiar with the complexity of the train transportation there. ^_^;
[4] The region Tokyo is located in.
Track 8: Welcome to the Hunter Ryokan! [1]
Hisoka: Okay, we’re here, everybody.
Gon: Hot springs!
Killua: Yeah!
Kurapika: So tired... Three hours on the bus. Five hours on the train. Thirty minutes of waiting. Twelve hours on the plane. Seven nights and eight days on the ship. Where on the Earth are we!?
Leorio: Don’t ask me.
Mito: Welcome to the Hunter Ryokan! You must be tired. I’m the mistress of this inn, my name is Mito.
Hisoka: I thought we will meet again.
Leorio: By the way, how did you manage to get here faster than us? What’s more, you’ve already changed your clothes.
Gon: Hey, hey, Mito-san! Are there hot springs here? Hot springs!
Mito: Of course there are!
Gon & Killua: Yay!
Killua: Gon, let’s go!
Gon: Okay!
Leorio: Hey, wait! What about the meeting? Hisoka... erm, the president will be mad at you!
Hisoka: It’s hot springs!
Leorio: It was a good bath!
Gon: A wide bathing place is good, isn’t it?
Leorio: After a bath, there’s nothing like a bottle of milk!
Killua: Coffee-flavoured milk for me!
Hisoka: I’ll have a fruit-flavoured one.
Gon: I’m drinking too! You put your left hand on your hip while drinking, right?
Killua: Of course! A promise.
Kurapika: Hey, shouldn’t we start the meeting soon?
Leorio: Hey, president Hisoka! You’ll at least have the station pay for this milk, won’t you?
Hisoka: You’re on your own.
Leorio: Seriously...
Kurapika: Hey.
Leorio: Please don’t be stingy! It’s the TV station’s money anyway, ain’t it?... I mean, is it not?
Hisoka: This in other words means it’s my money.
Kurapika: Heyyy!
Leorio: You’re too loud, Kurapika. And why don’t you go into the hot spring?
Kurapika: You’ve all come here on your own money! Shouldn’t the meeting come first?
Leorio: But, hey...
Kurapika: What?
Leorio: Look at that.
Kurapika: Hm?
Killua: I’m going now!
Gon: I won’t loose this time!
Kurapika: Arrgh! So this time it’s table tennis?
Killua & Gon:
Kurapika: Gon! Killua!
Gon: What? What happened, Kurapika? You wanna play with us?
Killua: Oh, if so, then we’ll let Leorio in too and play doubles.
Kurapika: Wrong!!!
Leorio: Calm down, Kurapika! Your eyes are getting red!
Kurapika: I can’t do this, I can’t do this... What are you doing, Gon?
Gon: Huh? I came to the hot springs and I’m playing table tennis in a yukata. Mito-san told me this is a proper way...
Kurapika: Listen... I hate half-heartedness. We’re doing the meeting right now.
Gon: But...
Kurapika: What? You have any complaints?
Gon & Leorio: That.
Kurapika: What?
Hisoka: When you’re in hot springs, there’s nothing like a massage chair. Oh, there, there! Feels good.
Kurapika: Maybe I should have a bath too...
[1] A ryokan is a kind of a traditional Japanese inn, where the guests wear yukatas (casual summer kimonos), sleep in Japanese-styled rooms with tatami mats, bathe in hot springs, eat traditional food, and do other fun stuff. ^_^
Track 9: Yurete Kandagawa (Hisoka & Mito)
(The song.)
Track 10: “The Big Banquet”
Gon: Yeah!
Leorio: Good!
Hisoka: No, no...
Killua: I could do better than that.
Hisoka: Kill-chan, you wanna cover the trip expenses by yourself?
Killua: What a great song!
Mito: President, it was the best duet ever, wasn’t it?
Leorio: Aren’t you the mistress of this inn? When did you change into a yukata?...
Mito: Because currently I’m president Hisoka’s secretary.
Leorio: Wha...?
Hisoka: So now, when the mood has become more fun, shall we think about the ideas for the show?
Gon: Ah, that’s right!
Killua: Right, there was that thing too.
Leorio: I totally forgot.
Hisoka: A salary cut for all of you for the next ten years.
Everyone:
Gon: But even you were singing an enka [1], president!
Hisoka: That wasn’t an enka, that was a mood-ka. [2] So now... Oh? What happened to Kura-chan?
Leorio: Huh? Now when you mention him... Oh? Where did he go?
Mito: Kurapika went to take a bath.
Leorio: What?
Mito: Said that he got tired because of getting angry too much before.
Hisoka: That’s no good, not being able to act together in a group.
Leorio: I really don’t wanna hear that from you, president...
Hisoka: Ah, a good idea of a show came to my mind.
Leorio: What is it?
Hisoka: Say, there was some kind of a doubt issue whether Kura-chan isn’t in fact a girl, wasn’t there?
Leorio: Ah, now when you mention it...
Killua: There was something like that...
Hisoka: Let’s do that.
Everyone: Huh...?
Gon: But Kurapika isn’t really...
Hisoka: That’s okay, that’s okay. In this world, you produce your scoop on the spot, you see.
Leorio: Ahh...
Hisoka: We’ll film the entrance to the women’s bath, and add Kura-chan’s bathing scene to it...
Leorio: After that, shall we force him into wearing women’s clothing?
Hisoka:
Everyone: Hmmm...
(Image of) Kurapika: Welcome home. Will you have a bath? Will you have a meal? Or... Ahh!
Everyone:
Hisoka: Good! With this, our viewership will rise greatly!
Leorio: Ahahaha, this is the best!
Killua: Interesting!
Leorio: Okay, let’s write it down. Kurapika will... Dress like a woman... And then... Hahahaha!
Everyone:
Gon: But won’t Kura-chan get angry?
Hisoka: We’ll say that it was Leori-chan’s idea.
Leorio: That’s right, that it was my idea... No, no, this is not okay, president!
Hisoka: Girl’s clothing will surely suit Kura-chan...
Mito: True, he will look really pretty!
Kurapika: What is pretty?
Everyone: Ahhh! That was sudden...
Killua: Don’t call out so suddenly!
Hisoka: My heartbeat stopped because of you... Ahh, heart massage, heart massage, left atrium, right atrium, chamber...
Kurapika: What happened? Did you think of any good plan?
Leorio: Eh? Ah! Umm... Ahh, well...
Kurapika: What is it, Leorio? You’ve just hidden something, haven’t you?
Leorio: Nn?
Kurapika: What is it? Show me.
Leorio: S... stop, it’s nothing!
Kurapika & Leorio:
Hisoka: Things don’t quite look good...
Gon: It’s possible that when Kurapika sees this note, his eyes will turn red...
Killua: I don’t want any killing, after we’ve come all the way to the hot springs!
Hisoka: A murder in the steam... This will sell.
Mito: It’s not the time to say such things!
Hisoka: Ah, excuse me. Hello? Ah, it’s you. No, not at all. I’m totally free. Yeah, I’m in hot springs now. Ehh? Right now? I know, you’re such a bad boy. I got it. Be there soon.
Ahh, sorry. Some sudden business came up. I’m going back.
Killua: Ehh?
Gon: Why?
Hisoka: You can’t really say no to the sponsor’s phonecall.
Mito: What part of this call was from the sponsor!?
Hisoka: So, we’ll end it at this. Goodbye!
Mito: Ah, me too!
Killua: Hey, wait!
Gon: Hey, don’t leave me!
Leorio: Hey, wait! Wait!
Kurapika: Leo-Leorio! Why are you-- I won’t! I won’t show it!
Leorio: I’m telling you, show me the proof!
Kurapika: I’m telling you, leave it!
Leorio: It’s okay! Take your yukata off a bit!
Kurapika: Wait! Let me go!
Leorio: I want to make sure! Hey--
[1] A sentimental semi-traditional Japanese song - see previous track. ^_^
[2] As in a mood-setting song, I guess? ^_^; (Unless it’s the kind of “mood” that’s referred to in the radio drama CDs, as in the “moody restaurant” and such... XD;)
Track 11: TV Hisoka on air now!
Hisoka: H-U-N-T-E-R H-U-N-T-E-R. This is TV Hisoka. Video output 47 kW. Video frequency 1.254 MHz. Now everybody, TV Hisoka is starting now!
Good evening! It’s Morning Hisoka News. Yesterday, an election took place on Whale Island. By unanimous consent of all the islanders, I, Hisoka-sama was chosen as the president. Right now I’ll announce the new law, concerning personal freedom. In other words, of Hisoka, by Hisoka, for Hisoka--
Track 12: “Next episode preview”
Mito: Unfortunately we’re interrupting the program, but here are the news.
Hisoka: Hey, you.
Gon & Killua: Mito-san?
Leorio: Don’t tell me you’re a part-time announcer this time.
Mito: The main character of the next installment, “Character In CD - Hunter x Hunter - Volume 4” has been decided. The name of this person is... It’s me, Mito!
Everyone: What!?
Mito: The title will be “Mito x DJ x Beautiful”. Please treat me kindly!
Kurapika: Hey!
Hisoka: What’s this about?
Leorio: It’s not me?
Killua: I thought I’ll release another one...
Kurapika: The next one will be me!!!
Everyone: Wahh!
Kurapika: The next CD will be mine!
Leorio: What, how boring.
Hisoka: Truly not interesting.
Killua: I’d like some unexpected development.
Gon: Then let’s leave Kurapika, and choose Kaito-san.
Leorio: How about Lippo-san?
Gon: I think it’s a good idea, with rock and paper, you know.
Kurapika: Endure... I have to endure. You’ll have enough of me on the next CD.
Mito: So, “Character in CD - Hunter x Hunter - Volume 4” will be released on the 23th of August. The contents... will be thought about from now on. Please look forward to it!
Kurapika: The grudge of being made fun of for all this time... surely...