[fic] 24hour_themes: Catharsis
Prompt: 08h00 ; Personal change aimed towards the conscious mind
Title: Catharsis
Fandom: D.Gray-man
Characters: Kanda Yuu, Li Lenalee
Rating: G
Summary: She always wears a smiling glass mask in front of everyone. But not everyone has the privilege of seeing what was beneath it.
Disclaimer: D.Gray-man and all of its characters belong to Katsura Hoshino.
Notes: Catharsis is the purging of emotions or emotional release. For example, experiencing stress over a work-related situation may cause feelings of frustration and tension. Rather than vent these feelings inappropriately, the individual may instead release these feelings in another way, such as through physical activity or another stress relieving activity. There's also the 'theatrical' definition but... I'm too lazy to look it up.
Catharsis
“What are you doing?”
It was a voice he could never mistake for someone else’s. For the last two months since he had begun staying within the walls of the Order, it was that one voice that had always called, greeted, accosted and chided him. Kanda cracked one eye open in dismay, hoping his well-practiced glare would work this time. Li Lenalee, however, was one force to be reckoned with, he thought flatly, as the eight-year-old Chinese peered curiously over his shoulders. Her ability to dismiss his glares was exceptional.
“Kanda, what are you doing?” she asked again, this time, with an accompanying poke on the cheek. “Kanda, answer me!”
He grumbled irritably in reply. It was barely eight in the morning and she was already pestering him before breakfast. “I’m meditating. Go away.”
“Stingy.”
Kanda glared darkly as he watched her take seat beside him and mimic his posture. She was demanding and insistent and too difficult. To think that she was a girl and two years younger than he was. As she sat down though, he inwardly noted a limp in one of her legs, her ankles seemingly darkened with bruises. Still, despite its seeming severity, he made no remark about it as she did not voice anything about it. She had always been like that, always smiling, never complaining. Sometimes, he wondered if she was eight at all.
“Now teach me,” she said, her voice sunny and bright and her smile wide. There was no trace of pain in her expression, nothing in her eyes.
“Teach you what?”
“How to meditate, silly Kanda.”
He grumbled again under his breath, asking himself why he even bothered. But as he glanced at her from the corner of his eyes, taking in her stiff posture and tensed body, he could see that she was restless, impatient. There was something wrong, something different. And yet not a word of protest left her lips. She remained smiling, ever nonchalant.
“Kanda, what do we do now?” Her eyes were closed, her lower lip between her teeth.
“We shut up, that’s what,” he retorted irately, dismissing his Master’s words about him being in that critical, short-tempered and emotional stage.
He sensed her wince at his tone and he bit his tongue, somehow regretting what he had done inwardly. The fact that she was there, the fact that he could sense that there was something wrong… His hands closed into tight fists on his knees, his brows furrowed.
“Kanda…”
He was getting annoyed yet again, by her presence, by his lack of focus, by his mind thinking too many thoughts when it should be clear.
“Does this meditating thing make the pain go away?” Her voice was softer this time, almost inaudible.
His eyes flashed open and he turned to look at her, a startled expression on his face. Her eyes were still closed, her face seemingly peaceful and serene despite the lines on her forehead. But he was unable to answer her inquiry, not because he had no answer but because she suddenly rose to her feet, her head turned towards the door. He could see the pain etched across her expression, her lips pressed together, her hands balled into fists. He heard her speak so softly, so quietly.
“They found me.”
Then, without a warning, Li Lenalee turned to him, the pain gone and replaced by her bright, cheery smile. The way she changed expressions was so fast, so unnoticeable. And it was forced, he knew. She knew. They both knew, but he made no remark. Nothing at all.
“I don’t think I quite get it just yet.” The meditation, she was pointing out. “You’ll have to teach me again sometime.”
There was a curt knock on the door and he briefly caught glimpse of a tall man in uniform as she stepped outside. They were taking her away again, just like before, just like now. And there was nothing he could do.
Title: Catharsis
Fandom: D.Gray-man
Characters: Kanda Yuu, Li Lenalee
Rating: G
Summary: She always wears a smiling glass mask in front of everyone. But not everyone has the privilege of seeing what was beneath it.
Disclaimer: D.Gray-man and all of its characters belong to Katsura Hoshino.
Notes: Catharsis is the purging of emotions or emotional release. For example, experiencing stress over a work-related situation may cause feelings of frustration and tension. Rather than vent these feelings inappropriately, the individual may instead release these feelings in another way, such as through physical activity or another stress relieving activity. There's also the 'theatrical' definition but... I'm too lazy to look it up.
Catharsis
“What are you doing?”
It was a voice he could never mistake for someone else’s. For the last two months since he had begun staying within the walls of the Order, it was that one voice that had always called, greeted, accosted and chided him. Kanda cracked one eye open in dismay, hoping his well-practiced glare would work this time. Li Lenalee, however, was one force to be reckoned with, he thought flatly, as the eight-year-old Chinese peered curiously over his shoulders. Her ability to dismiss his glares was exceptional.
“Kanda, what are you doing?” she asked again, this time, with an accompanying poke on the cheek. “Kanda, answer me!”
He grumbled irritably in reply. It was barely eight in the morning and she was already pestering him before breakfast. “I’m meditating. Go away.”
“Stingy.”
Kanda glared darkly as he watched her take seat beside him and mimic his posture. She was demanding and insistent and too difficult. To think that she was a girl and two years younger than he was. As she sat down though, he inwardly noted a limp in one of her legs, her ankles seemingly darkened with bruises. Still, despite its seeming severity, he made no remark about it as she did not voice anything about it. She had always been like that, always smiling, never complaining. Sometimes, he wondered if she was eight at all.
“Now teach me,” she said, her voice sunny and bright and her smile wide. There was no trace of pain in her expression, nothing in her eyes.
“Teach you what?”
“How to meditate, silly Kanda.”
He grumbled again under his breath, asking himself why he even bothered. But as he glanced at her from the corner of his eyes, taking in her stiff posture and tensed body, he could see that she was restless, impatient. There was something wrong, something different. And yet not a word of protest left her lips. She remained smiling, ever nonchalant.
“Kanda, what do we do now?” Her eyes were closed, her lower lip between her teeth.
“We shut up, that’s what,” he retorted irately, dismissing his Master’s words about him being in that critical, short-tempered and emotional stage.
He sensed her wince at his tone and he bit his tongue, somehow regretting what he had done inwardly. The fact that she was there, the fact that he could sense that there was something wrong… His hands closed into tight fists on his knees, his brows furrowed.
“Kanda…”
He was getting annoyed yet again, by her presence, by his lack of focus, by his mind thinking too many thoughts when it should be clear.
“Does this meditating thing make the pain go away?” Her voice was softer this time, almost inaudible.
His eyes flashed open and he turned to look at her, a startled expression on his face. Her eyes were still closed, her face seemingly peaceful and serene despite the lines on her forehead. But he was unable to answer her inquiry, not because he had no answer but because she suddenly rose to her feet, her head turned towards the door. He could see the pain etched across her expression, her lips pressed together, her hands balled into fists. He heard her speak so softly, so quietly.
“They found me.”
Then, without a warning, Li Lenalee turned to him, the pain gone and replaced by her bright, cheery smile. The way she changed expressions was so fast, so unnoticeable. And it was forced, he knew. She knew. They both knew, but he made no remark. Nothing at all.
“I don’t think I quite get it just yet.” The meditation, she was pointing out. “You’ll have to teach me again sometime.”
There was a curt knock on the door and he briefly caught glimpse of a tall man in uniform as she stepped outside. They were taking her away again, just like before, just like now. And there was nothing he could do.