Snickle Dippinsniffer Says...
And according to the meme below, their names would translate to Dorfus Frickenchunks & Crusty, nonrespectively... (~_^)
The following is excerpted from a children's book, "Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants" by Dave Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...
1~Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name...
a=snickle
b=doombah
c=goober
d=cheesey
e=crusty
f=greasy
g=dumbo
h=farcus
i=dorky
j=doofus
k=funky
l=boobie
m=sleezy
n=sloopy
o=fluffy
p=stinky
q=slimy
r=dorfus
s=snooty
t=tootsie
u=dipsy
v=sneezy
w=liver
x=skippy
y=dinky
z=zippy
2~Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name...
a=dippin
b=feather
c=batty
d=burger
e=chicken
f=barffy
g=lizard
h=waffle
i=farkle
j=monkey
k=flippin
l=fricken
m=bubble
n=rhino
o=potty
p=hamster
q=buckle
r=gizzard
s=lickin
t=snickle
u=chuckle
v=pickle
w=hubble
x=dingle
y=gorilla
z=girdle
3~Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name...
a=butt
b=boob
c=face
d=nose
e=hump
f=breath
g=pants
h=shorts
i=lips
j=honker
k=head
l=tush
m=chunks
n=dunkin
o=brains
p=biscuits
q=toes
r=doodle
s=fanny
t=sniffer
u=sprinkles
v=frack
w=squirt
x=humperdinck
y=hiney
z=juice
Aaaand, FAFTD of the day belongs to
missdiane which out of context may not seem that funny, unless you've read the post it's attached to, here...