(drabble) bugging out
exo | junmyeon-centric | PG-13
the members of exo are generally incapable of dealing with certain things.
word count: 910
Living with EXO means Junmyeon becomes painfully accustomed to walking in on things. Jongin has the habit of leaving doors unlocked regardless of whatever he’s doing-Junmyeon has even had to shut the bathroom door on several occasions because he freaking forgets to close it. Then there was that one time he had accidentally found out that Sehun liked cover himself in glitter and blast Katy Perry music when no one was around. Oh, and he’s also pretty much seen every sex position in existence (Baekhyun and Chanyeol are shamelessly experimental).
So when he comes back one day to find all the members standing on various furniture (Zitao has somehow perched himself on a very unstable looking vase), he doesn’t think much of it.
“Are you guys playing ‘the floor is lava’ again?” He says long-sufferingly as he kicks his shoes off.
“JOONIE DON’T MOVE!” Luhan squawks from his place on the kitchen counter where he, Jongin, Kyungsoo and Yixing are clinging onto each other for dear life.
“Ahhhh, I’m dead,” Junmyeon deadpans as he tries to cross the living room.
“NO!” All the members scream simultaneously. Junmyeon stops and blinks at them.
“Well, gosh guys...I’m not actually dead...if you wanted me to play so bad you could have just asked,” he says with a touched voice.
“There’s a cockroach in the apartment!” Kyungsoo wails from the kitchen counter.
There is silence.
“You guys....are trying to avoid...a bug,” Junmyeon says slowly, coming to terms with the situation.
“A COCKROACH!” Jongin yells in protest.
“It’s just a bug,” the leader shrugs. There is a collective gasp in the room.
“Junmyeon-” Baekhyun pauses for a moment and carefully hops from the couch to the massage chair to the footstool, ignoring Chanyeol’s shouts of concern, until he’s close enough to Junmyeon to put his hand on Junmyeon’s shoulder. “It is not just a bug, hyung. It is a pest,” he hisses out the last word like it’s acid on his tongue. Junmyeon is not impressed.
He searches around before he finds the tallest member, the latter’s almost touching the ceiling from his place on one of the chairs at their dining table.
“You too, Kris?”
“Bugs crawling on your skin is most definitely not productive towards a flawless complexion,” the statuesque member says, somehow making the otherwise girly statement sound incredibly manly....sort of.
“AUGH! THERE IT IS!” Luhan screams suddenly and several of the members join him and Junmyeon counts almost seven cans of bug spray being whipped out of nowhere before the symphony of ‘psssssssssssst’ fills the apartment.
“OH! Oh, no, sorry, that’s just a stain on the floor.” There are several sighs of relief and disappointment as Junmyeon coughs and fans the now polluted-air in front of him away with his hand.
“Don’t worry, Joonie! We used the non-toxic bug sp- oh,” Minseok’s sentence stops short as he reads the can in his hand. He tucks it back behind him warily. “Nevermind.”
“Guys, this is ridiculous! You can’t stay on the furniture forever!”
“I find it rather conductive,” Zitao says from where he’s now twisted himself into a yoga pose atop the vase.
“What about schedules?” Junmyeon tries to reason.
“You could convince management that our next concept could involve platform shoes. The Spice Girls rocked that look,” Yixing pipes up.
“Firstly, we are not a five-piece British girl group-”
“We could be,” Luhan cuts in.
“No! No, we could not be. And secondly, you guys need to learn to face your fears.”
“I have a fear of death but I don’t think I can face that,” Jongdae points out. Junmyeon shoots a glare so deadly and unbecoming of him that the members all freeze and Jongdae ducks behind Kris with a ‘shutting up now’.
“Okay, but please please pleeeeeaaaseee Junmyeon-hyung please kill them for us this one time. Just this once?” Sehun begs from his position on the couch. The other members nod furiously in agreement.
Junmyeon opens his mouth to reply when he hears the sound of faint scuttling on the parkay floor. The members promptly start screaming again and Junmyeon turns to see a rather pathetic looking cockroach crawling towards him.
“RUN, JUNMYEON! RUN BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!”
Sighing, Junmyeon mumbles a ‘I’m sorry, Mr Cockroach’ before raising his slipper-clad foot and slamming it down on the insect. There’s a stunned silence in the room, punctuated by the crunch of the insect’s untimely death.
He solemnly moves his foot away before moving to grab some sheets of old newspaper from the table. He bends down and wraps the cockroach corpse up in the Politics section before walking towards the dustbin. Along the way, he nudges the bundle at the group who have sought refuge on the kitchen counter, and they squeak and squawk in horror, clinging on to each other.
“You guys....are such chickens,” Junmyeon announces to them after he’s done throwing the insect away before he goes back to his room. An awkward silence ensues after his door closes, which is only broken after what feels like several agonizing minutes by Chanyeol.
“I can’t believe we just got called chickens by a dude in slippers and socks."
===
A/N: huh I actually managed to write something in the canon verse for once. anyway, yeah...exams kill creativity. boo.
the members of exo are generally incapable of dealing with certain things.
word count: 910
Living with EXO means Junmyeon becomes painfully accustomed to walking in on things. Jongin has the habit of leaving doors unlocked regardless of whatever he’s doing-Junmyeon has even had to shut the bathroom door on several occasions because he freaking forgets to close it. Then there was that one time he had accidentally found out that Sehun liked cover himself in glitter and blast Katy Perry music when no one was around. Oh, and he’s also pretty much seen every sex position in existence (Baekhyun and Chanyeol are shamelessly experimental).
So when he comes back one day to find all the members standing on various furniture (Zitao has somehow perched himself on a very unstable looking vase), he doesn’t think much of it.
“Are you guys playing ‘the floor is lava’ again?” He says long-sufferingly as he kicks his shoes off.
“JOONIE DON’T MOVE!” Luhan squawks from his place on the kitchen counter where he, Jongin, Kyungsoo and Yixing are clinging onto each other for dear life.
“Ahhhh, I’m dead,” Junmyeon deadpans as he tries to cross the living room.
“NO!” All the members scream simultaneously. Junmyeon stops and blinks at them.
“Well, gosh guys...I’m not actually dead...if you wanted me to play so bad you could have just asked,” he says with a touched voice.
“There’s a cockroach in the apartment!” Kyungsoo wails from the kitchen counter.
There is silence.
“You guys....are trying to avoid...a bug,” Junmyeon says slowly, coming to terms with the situation.
“A COCKROACH!” Jongin yells in protest.
“It’s just a bug,” the leader shrugs. There is a collective gasp in the room.
“Junmyeon-” Baekhyun pauses for a moment and carefully hops from the couch to the massage chair to the footstool, ignoring Chanyeol’s shouts of concern, until he’s close enough to Junmyeon to put his hand on Junmyeon’s shoulder. “It is not just a bug, hyung. It is a pest,” he hisses out the last word like it’s acid on his tongue. Junmyeon is not impressed.
He searches around before he finds the tallest member, the latter’s almost touching the ceiling from his place on one of the chairs at their dining table.
“You too, Kris?”
“Bugs crawling on your skin is most definitely not productive towards a flawless complexion,” the statuesque member says, somehow making the otherwise girly statement sound incredibly manly....sort of.
“AUGH! THERE IT IS!” Luhan screams suddenly and several of the members join him and Junmyeon counts almost seven cans of bug spray being whipped out of nowhere before the symphony of ‘psssssssssssst’ fills the apartment.
“OH! Oh, no, sorry, that’s just a stain on the floor.” There are several sighs of relief and disappointment as Junmyeon coughs and fans the now polluted-air in front of him away with his hand.
“Don’t worry, Joonie! We used the non-toxic bug sp- oh,” Minseok’s sentence stops short as he reads the can in his hand. He tucks it back behind him warily. “Nevermind.”
“Guys, this is ridiculous! You can’t stay on the furniture forever!”
“I find it rather conductive,” Zitao says from where he’s now twisted himself into a yoga pose atop the vase.
“What about schedules?” Junmyeon tries to reason.
“You could convince management that our next concept could involve platform shoes. The Spice Girls rocked that look,” Yixing pipes up.
“Firstly, we are not a five-piece British girl group-”
“We could be,” Luhan cuts in.
“No! No, we could not be. And secondly, you guys need to learn to face your fears.”
“I have a fear of death but I don’t think I can face that,” Jongdae points out. Junmyeon shoots a glare so deadly and unbecoming of him that the members all freeze and Jongdae ducks behind Kris with a ‘shutting up now’.
“Okay, but please please pleeeeeaaaseee Junmyeon-hyung please kill them for us this one time. Just this once?” Sehun begs from his position on the couch. The other members nod furiously in agreement.
Junmyeon opens his mouth to reply when he hears the sound of faint scuttling on the parkay floor. The members promptly start screaming again and Junmyeon turns to see a rather pathetic looking cockroach crawling towards him.
“RUN, JUNMYEON! RUN BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!”
Sighing, Junmyeon mumbles a ‘I’m sorry, Mr Cockroach’ before raising his slipper-clad foot and slamming it down on the insect. There’s a stunned silence in the room, punctuated by the crunch of the insect’s untimely death.
He solemnly moves his foot away before moving to grab some sheets of old newspaper from the table. He bends down and wraps the cockroach corpse up in the Politics section before walking towards the dustbin. Along the way, he nudges the bundle at the group who have sought refuge on the kitchen counter, and they squeak and squawk in horror, clinging on to each other.
“You guys....are such chickens,” Junmyeon announces to them after he’s done throwing the insect away before he goes back to his room. An awkward silence ensues after his door closes, which is only broken after what feels like several agonizing minutes by Chanyeol.
“I can’t believe we just got called chickens by a dude in slippers and socks."
===
A/N: huh I actually managed to write something in the canon verse for once. anyway, yeah...exams kill creativity. boo.