Rain Chapter 3
It was two months after my seventeenth birthday when Mom died. She supposedly died of natural causes, but she wasn’t even forty yet. I was a junior in high school and didn’t have a job. Because of that Mom didn’t have a real funeral. I bought a plot with a portion of the money I had in my college fund. You and I stood watched a man, dressed in a flannel shirt and jeans, lower her cheap coffin into the ground.
“I don’t know if you understand, Gee… but she’s not coming back. It’s just you and me.”
I knew that if anybody found out Mom died, we would be put in a foster home. I was afraid that we might even be put in separate places, so for ten months I kept it a secret. For a while I acted my best at school and I always had excuses as to why my parents didn’t came to any school events.
One thing I noticed about you is that after Mom died, you weren’t as playful. Every time you fell or got hurt, you would cry twice as hard.
“Don’t cry… I’ll take care of you now.”
Not even two weeks after Mom died, I met Frank. I never knew how two people could instantly click after a few days. That is, until I met him. We didn’t’ have much time to hang out because I had go back home at lunch to check on you and rush home after school. But the time we did have to talk made me feel like we knew each other for years.
Frank always asked to come over, but I always said, “Mom doesn’t like to have people over when she’s away” or “Sorry, I’m grounded”. it wasn’t because I was ashamed of you; I just didn’t think he would understand. He never believed the excuses.
A month after mom died, money was started to run short. I was draining my whole college fund to pay the bills, notes, buy food, and for other necessities. I did the only thing I could think of at the time. I dropped out of school and got two jobs. My main job was a local convenience store down the street from our house. I continued to check on you on breaks and after many weeks I taught you how to use the phone to call me if you need help. I ended up being the one to call you every ten minutes.
I ran into the house like a madman, but you didn’t budge from your spot in front of the window.
I started to notice a pattern in my manager’s appearances. He always showed up exactly seven minutes before closing to lock up and check the register as I swept because apparently newbies couldn’t be trusted with that. A week after I noticed this, I started bringing you to work with me. You played quietly in the employee’s room while I helped customers. Near the end of my shift, customers hardly showed up so I had time take you home and was always be back before my manager got back.
On the weekends I cleaned house for our old neighbor who always thought I was “so adorable”. The job took most of Saturday and Sunday because I checked in on you a lot and Ms. Amy loved to talk. I didn’t really mind that her house was always a mess when she gave those forty dollars to me at the end of Sunday.
“You’re gonna have to eat a little less… just for a while until I get another promotion.”
My two jobs were enough to barely get us by, but they did. The jobs were tiring and my new found coffee addiction didn’t really keep me fully awake. I didn’t really eat those days so I was literally running only on coffee and when the caffeine wore off, I feel asleep wherever I was.
There were so many times where I just wanted to quit working and go back to school, but I always thought of you. You needed my help. But I missed Frank. Thinking of him is what made me want to go back. I didn’t even tell him that I was dropping out when I did. Even though I didn’t want him to worry, I hoped he missed me too.
Five months and seventeen days after mom died is I day I’ll always remember. It was 2:54 on a Thursday afternoon. As usual, you were in the backroom watching Power Rangers on the black and white battery powered television. It had been a slow day as all Thursdays were. On the front counter I was stacking playing cards that were on display by the register. A bell rang out signaling that a customer came in. most of the people who came that time of day. Imagine my surprise when I saw it was Frank. Apparently, he was skipping school.
My brain stopped thinking logically and all I could think to do was to duck behind the counter, but I didn’t duck soon enough because he saw me anyway.
“Mikey?” There was no point in hiding anymore. I slowly got to my feet and wave shyly, not even looking at his face. “Why haven’t you called me? Why’d you drop out? Is this where you’ve been the whole time?” He shot the questions out so fast that it took me a few seconds to process what he said.
“Um, sorry…” I muttered. The counter suddenly became very interesting.
“Sorry? You become my best friend then just drop out of school without telling me? I thought you were just sick the first few days, but then I hear through a fucking rumor that you weren’t coming back.” He didn’t even give me a chance to say anything before he kept on, a little more calmer this time. “Best friends are supposed to be there for each other, Mikey. If there’s something going on, I want to help.” You were crying in the backroom, that’s all I really cared for at the moment. I excused myself from the register to see what was wrong.
You were sitting on the floor completely bawling. I could tell from the way the sobs racked through your body that you wouldn’t be easily comforted. I held you, kissed your face, and ran my hand through your hair like I always did. It wasn’t working. There was only one other time, I can remember, you cried that hard. It was during the time Mom and Dad were arguing about taking you to a doctor. I was only seven or eight, but I remembered Mom rocking you and singing until you fell asleep. I sat down on the floor and pulled you into my lap and rocked you gently. Even though I couldn’t carry a tune to save my life, you didn’t care. You just wanted the noise.
Frank walked into the backroom with a mixture of confusion and anger gracing his features. I glanced up at him but didn’t let his presence keep me from trying to calm you down. After a couple of minutes I looked back up a Frank and shook my head. There was no way he could help.
For a while no one said anything. You were still awake because my singing didn’t put you to sleep, but at least you were calmed down. Frank was obviously and thoroughly confused. He kept looking between you and me waiting for an explanation. I sighed and tried my best to give him one.
“Frank, this is my older brother, Gerard. I know I never mentioned him to you, but I know you really wouldn’t understand that. He’s sick… mentally, and I have to take care of him. Our mom died several months ago, but no one can know about this. At least not until I turn eighteen, and the only way you can help is by not telling anyone.”
He shook his head slowly and looked away. “So… you dropped out of school to work so that you can support him?” He turned his attention back to me to see me nod. An awkward silence followed. I could tell he was thinking pretty hard. “I want to help.”
I looked at him like had grown a second head. He had to be on something. “Why would you want to help? You haven’t really known me that long, and you don’t know Gerard at all. There are tons of bills to pay. There’s food to buy. I don’t’ really think you’d want to do that. The last thing I would want is for you to drop out, and-”
“I’m not… dropping out. I was just thinking of maybe getting a part-time job and going you most of my paycheck.”
“Why do you even want to do this? Why are you willing to give up your free time just to help me?” My voice was gradually getting high pitched, and if we weren’t arguing I’m sure Frank would have laughed. I heard the bell above the front door ring. “Please leave. You’re no supposed to be back here. You are not helping and I don’t want you to.” Without waiting for an answer, I pushed Frank out the employee room and went back to my position at the register.
As my shift went on and the few customers came and went, Frank hung around trying to change my mind. I either ignored him or told him to go away. One good trait about him is that he’s rather persistent, but at the time I was ready to go off on him.
“Look. No matter how many times and ways you ask, I will turn you down. Please, just… leave me alone. Go home, do your homework, and move on with your life.” Frank appeared as if he ignored my whole speech.
“Mikey, please let me just help you out a little. I want to do this.” He pecked me on my cheek. I didn’t think anything of it.
“Leave.” I looked at him, my face unchanging. I’m not telling you again.”
And he did.
Con-crit also very welcome.