ficlet: Loveless Crossover 3 - Crawford's ears
for takerzmuse
Loveless Crossover x3 (and probably the last) Crawford's ears
(also probably the crackiest)
For some reason it fell upon a generation of older men to buy headbands and the other accroutrements that teenagers used to hide the fact that they had lost their ears.
Because of this, or most likely capitalising on this, there was a section in most sex shops although the items could be bought legally over the counter in most chemists. It was just less embarrassing in the sex shop.
The headbands were designed to be worn for long periods of time, they were lined in a soft velvet but because they were worn for hours at a time they had a tendency to rub sores in the worst cases but in most cases it just gave cradle cap.
So the pharmaceutical companies had developed creams and powders to cope with it. They sat on the shelf between the lubricants and the cock rings.
Yohji was no stranger to sex shops and he couldn’t understand why people were embarrassed about purchasing things for their pleasure. He himself was torn between a platinum rabbit and a rather intriguing little device shaped like a dolphin when the figure in the trench coat walked in. It was such a cliché he burst out laughing. The figure just balled up a little more to make his collar cover even more of his face.
It would have worked quite well if Yohji hadn’t known who he was.
Crawford looked more uncomfortable in a sex shop than a condom salesman in the Vatican.
He shuffled over to the display of head powders and creams before picking a dark brown headband, one bottle of powder and a tube of medicated cream for sores before shuffling over to the counter.
The sales person had snuck off for five minutes for a crafty cigarette secure that everything was security tagged before doing so.
“So,” Yohji said, sidling up to Crawford, “imagine meeting you in a place like this, I thought it would be Schuldig.”
Crawford, to his credit, tried to deny everything. “I’m sorry sir, I think you have me mistaken for someone else.”
Yohji almost laughed. “come on,” he said, “so who you buying this shit for?” He looked at the items in Crawford’s hand, including a dark brown set of ears, “oh-my-god,” he managed in a breathless rush, “they’re for Nagi.”
Crawford didn’t appear to move as he put his hand around Yohji’s throat, “Say a word and I’ll kill you.”
“What is the kid now, nine?”
“Fifteen.” Crawford growled. “And they just fell off. It happens.”
“Kid’s got a girlfriend.” Yohji shrugged off, “I never thought of telling my mom that they just fell off, but kid’s legal, barely, but whatever floats your boat, I like ‘em to be eighteen and willing.”
“I suppose that explains your penchant for antique furniture.” Crawford replied, “and I am not sleeping with Nagi.”
Yohji shrugged off the insult because he didn’t really get it, “the blue box stuff is better, it’s what Omi uses.” He said taking the box out of Crawford’s hands and replacing it, “the bands rub behind the ears.”
Crawford thanked him because at least it was well intention. “D’ya know,” Yohji continued as he picked up several packets of batteries, “Aya lost his ears recently too, you don’t think they’re having sex?”
If Crawford had have been drinking he would have done a spit take.
Loveless Crossover x3 (and probably the last) Crawford's ears
(also probably the crackiest)
For some reason it fell upon a generation of older men to buy headbands and the other accroutrements that teenagers used to hide the fact that they had lost their ears.
Because of this, or most likely capitalising on this, there was a section in most sex shops although the items could be bought legally over the counter in most chemists. It was just less embarrassing in the sex shop.
The headbands were designed to be worn for long periods of time, they were lined in a soft velvet but because they were worn for hours at a time they had a tendency to rub sores in the worst cases but in most cases it just gave cradle cap.
So the pharmaceutical companies had developed creams and powders to cope with it. They sat on the shelf between the lubricants and the cock rings.
Yohji was no stranger to sex shops and he couldn’t understand why people were embarrassed about purchasing things for their pleasure. He himself was torn between a platinum rabbit and a rather intriguing little device shaped like a dolphin when the figure in the trench coat walked in. It was such a cliché he burst out laughing. The figure just balled up a little more to make his collar cover even more of his face.
It would have worked quite well if Yohji hadn’t known who he was.
Crawford looked more uncomfortable in a sex shop than a condom salesman in the Vatican.
He shuffled over to the display of head powders and creams before picking a dark brown headband, one bottle of powder and a tube of medicated cream for sores before shuffling over to the counter.
The sales person had snuck off for five minutes for a crafty cigarette secure that everything was security tagged before doing so.
“So,” Yohji said, sidling up to Crawford, “imagine meeting you in a place like this, I thought it would be Schuldig.”
Crawford, to his credit, tried to deny everything. “I’m sorry sir, I think you have me mistaken for someone else.”
Yohji almost laughed. “come on,” he said, “so who you buying this shit for?” He looked at the items in Crawford’s hand, including a dark brown set of ears, “oh-my-god,” he managed in a breathless rush, “they’re for Nagi.”
Crawford didn’t appear to move as he put his hand around Yohji’s throat, “Say a word and I’ll kill you.”
“What is the kid now, nine?”
“Fifteen.” Crawford growled. “And they just fell off. It happens.”
“Kid’s got a girlfriend.” Yohji shrugged off, “I never thought of telling my mom that they just fell off, but kid’s legal, barely, but whatever floats your boat, I like ‘em to be eighteen and willing.”
“I suppose that explains your penchant for antique furniture.” Crawford replied, “and I am not sleeping with Nagi.”
Yohji shrugged off the insult because he didn’t really get it, “the blue box stuff is better, it’s what Omi uses.” He said taking the box out of Crawford’s hands and replacing it, “the bands rub behind the ears.”
Crawford thanked him because at least it was well intention. “D’ya know,” Yohji continued as he picked up several packets of batteries, “Aya lost his ears recently too, you don’t think they’re having sex?”
If Crawford had have been drinking he would have done a spit take.