POsting here for one person on LJ who I don't think is also on Dreamwidth
My mind is working both well and poorly. I've begun to ask what I suspect are the right questions because I don't like the answers even though they feel right. I think a belief I've held about myself for many years is false in a way I do not wish it to be.
Knowing this means I can take appropriate action. I'm uncertain how I'm going to deal with this, but knowing what I know now, having certain information and seeing how it applies to me, I can make better choices. What those choices will be I do not yet know.
One thing I have concluded is that to be rid of one problem also means risking the sacrifice of something I enjoy having. I am not willing to give up certain aspects of who I am in order to be free of my depression. Even if this means there are times when I want to die. When I can see no Joy in living.
A lot of medications that could help me with my mental illness will also impair my creativity. Creativity has long been a strong part of my Self Identity and to sacrifice it would be hard. It's also something I enjoy expressing in different ways.
Cooking, writing and drawing are the ones that first spring to mind.
I am not a recipe cook, I much prefer to see what is on hand and create something. Recipes can be useful, but I use them more for ideas and inspirations than for instructions. This is one of the more useful aspects of having a creative mind. Particularly when you are good at making combinations that are tasty and like to eat good food.
Another reason cooking is an enjoyable form of creativity is the amount of time it takes. Most of what I cook requires minimal prep time, which means I'm unlikely to grow bored of the project before it is finished. Some of what I cook regularly does take a while, but often the longest part of it is just letting it sit in the slow cooker.
I'm probably thinking of cooking in part because I am hungry. Ironically tonight I tossed a frozen lasagna in the oven and am not creating something for us to eat.
Tomorrow or the day after I'm going to make up a pot of refried beans. I do have a recipe bookmarked on my computer, but I won't even look at it. I've made it enough times that I know the basics and can play with it to get varying tasty results. Amusingly the amount of garlic often depends on how much of it I'm willing to peel.
Drawing is another quick creative task, though not as quick since I've started doing pointillistic ones. Making tons of dots to create a picture takes time. However I often have little idea about what the final result will be until I am finished. Occasionally I will have an outlined idea, but more often I just make dots on the paper until something shows itself and then I work to bring that out.
Writing is a challenge, first drafts aren't too much of a problem. However I know full well that first drafts are never very good. I suppose a more accurate way of putting it would be that I'm good at creative writing and not so good at editing my writings. This is a personality thing as much as a skill thing. I simply have trouble getting and maintaining interest long enough to properly edit a written piece of any significant length.
Knowing this means I can take appropriate action. I'm uncertain how I'm going to deal with this, but knowing what I know now, having certain information and seeing how it applies to me, I can make better choices. What those choices will be I do not yet know.
One thing I have concluded is that to be rid of one problem also means risking the sacrifice of something I enjoy having. I am not willing to give up certain aspects of who I am in order to be free of my depression. Even if this means there are times when I want to die. When I can see no Joy in living.
A lot of medications that could help me with my mental illness will also impair my creativity. Creativity has long been a strong part of my Self Identity and to sacrifice it would be hard. It's also something I enjoy expressing in different ways.
Cooking, writing and drawing are the ones that first spring to mind.
I am not a recipe cook, I much prefer to see what is on hand and create something. Recipes can be useful, but I use them more for ideas and inspirations than for instructions. This is one of the more useful aspects of having a creative mind. Particularly when you are good at making combinations that are tasty and like to eat good food.
Another reason cooking is an enjoyable form of creativity is the amount of time it takes. Most of what I cook requires minimal prep time, which means I'm unlikely to grow bored of the project before it is finished. Some of what I cook regularly does take a while, but often the longest part of it is just letting it sit in the slow cooker.
I'm probably thinking of cooking in part because I am hungry. Ironically tonight I tossed a frozen lasagna in the oven and am not creating something for us to eat.
Tomorrow or the day after I'm going to make up a pot of refried beans. I do have a recipe bookmarked on my computer, but I won't even look at it. I've made it enough times that I know the basics and can play with it to get varying tasty results. Amusingly the amount of garlic often depends on how much of it I'm willing to peel.
Drawing is another quick creative task, though not as quick since I've started doing pointillistic ones. Making tons of dots to create a picture takes time. However I often have little idea about what the final result will be until I am finished. Occasionally I will have an outlined idea, but more often I just make dots on the paper until something shows itself and then I work to bring that out.
Writing is a challenge, first drafts aren't too much of a problem. However I know full well that first drafts are never very good. I suppose a more accurate way of putting it would be that I'm good at creative writing and not so good at editing my writings. This is a personality thing as much as a skill thing. I simply have trouble getting and maintaining interest long enough to properly edit a written piece of any significant length.