And now...
"I kind of like them on her, 'cause she likes purple. They match her skin."
As I was walking home from my car I heard someone playing (or at least trying to play) "My Favorite Things" on either an accordion or... something else. It seemed worth mentioning at the time, but now... not so much.
I wanted to start a list of things that I'm ashamed of, but shouldn't be.
1) Where I live
My girlfriend and I share an apartment close to campus in the trap that is Olympia. Our building is old, a little run-down, and like many buildings in the pacific Northwest, has mold issues. It's painted dark green on the outside and has a rock facade that isn't fooling anyone. Jill's mother insists that we find somewhere else to live, but this place is cheap, the location is convenient, the size is good, and despite the mold and mediocre management it's actually kind of a nice place in some respects. We're sort of out in the woods, so it's quiet. Although we're on the ground floor, nobody harasses us. It stays cool because we're surrounded by so many trees and sometimes we get to watch random wildlife in the back. There's a few college students who live in the complex so once in a while there's a party or something that can be annoying, but... yeah.
We've spent like the past two years or so accumulating a bunch of stuff that we really don't need so moving would be annoying. Also, again, price and location are nice. I'm also unusually and irrationally resistant to change. -_-
2) What I do
I recently quit a job as an office manager at a local software company that wrote and sold security programs. After spending about a month there they offered me more responsibilities, since apparently I seem like someone who is capable of a lot more than just secretarial stuff. So instead of the just-a-rung-above-receptionist job I started with, I became technical support / office manager / receptionist. My pay, however, did not increase. I raised a fuss about it and didn't get what I wanted, so I quit. They weren't able to find a replacement despite my two weeks' notice, so I offered to stick around until a replacement could be trained... as long as they tripled my pay. To my surprise they agreed (with some caveats - I had to have perfect attendance while training or the triple would only become double) and I made a lot of money really fast. I also got the benefit of leaving on good terms.
Shortly after I started working as a courier as a couple-run title and closing company in downtown Olympia. Again, about a month in, they decided that I wasn't being used to my full potential, and offered some other positions that seemed to match my skill set. While I like the idea of making more money, I don't like the idea of taking on more stress. The courier position is nice because I just kind of drive around on my own, listen to music in my car, and have a lot of time to think to myself between mail stops. (I go from Olympia to Lacey to Tumwater and back again) I'm now also working as a file clerk and archivist in the same company. Again, more time to myself, (No annoying calls like at the last job) and I can work at my own pace. There's a dress code at the new place, (they're moving towards being more of a professional, conservative company rather than the small business they used to be) and there's a possibility that I may have to cut my hair again (meh) but overall it's pretty comfortable. I do miss some of the things at the old job though, like the lack of dress code (folks would go shoeless and wore Threadless t-shirts 75% of the time) and the free food, (As office manager I also stocked our office with enough lunch-food to feed the office every day, in addition to ordering office supplies) but the new place also has the benefit of having a higher women : men ratio. (1:5 at the old job, more like 3:1 at the new one.)
It's not glamorous, it's not my first choice, and I'm not changing the world, but I'm comfortable, generally complacent, and am able to put a little money away towards buying a house, or something.
3) Who I am
Yup, still a nerd. Even worse so now. My girlfriend and I play a massively-multi-player online game together. A lot. Our computers are set up right next to each other in our spare bedroom and we spend most of the time that we're not working, sleeping, eating, (in her case, going to school) or visiting family playing said game. We've developed relationships with some interesting people, and even drove down to southern Oregon to visit some a few weeks ago. No, we didn't die or get raped. It was a very fun time.
I still want a sex change. Some days it's worse than others, but always the worst in the summer. Money is still an issue. I haven't been spending a lot of time or energy pursuing it - mostly just longing for it. I don't cross-dress as much as I used to, (Another luxury lost by changing jobs) and feel that my body is changing in ways that make it more difficult to be passable. Anxiety is probably my biggest road block, aside from money. Also, distractions. (See above)
I think those are like my two most defining categories that I can slot in to. Nerd and Transomething. (I just made that up! Isn't it great?) I guess I'm also Asian, decreasingly athletic, failed intellectual (or something) um... yeah. I still play soccer with my dad and brother in a co-ed league some weekends, but aside from that my exercise is at like an all-time minimum. (Unless you count sex? But even then...)
So basically, yeah. That's... about the size of it. Putting it all down like that is kind of... depressing? I'm a year out of college and haven't really done anything. I mean, I'm getting by. We're getting by. It's kind of a transitional period we wait for Jill to graduate and *then* we can really decide what we want to do / where we want to go, but she wants to be close to family and I can't wait to get farther away. Maybe like Portland or something would be a nice compromise. Far, but not too far... and way better than Olympia from what I hear.
Things were just a lot more interesting once upon a time. I recently read a short story featuring Neil Gaiman's Shadow character from American Gods. It was in this Fantasy compilation that's been sitting in my car literally for like four years that I'd never bothered to look at closely. It was good, but made me sad. So much of what I see reminds me or something I've read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?
As I was walking home from my car I heard someone playing (or at least trying to play) "My Favorite Things" on either an accordion or... something else. It seemed worth mentioning at the time, but now... not so much.
I wanted to start a list of things that I'm ashamed of, but shouldn't be.
1) Where I live
My girlfriend and I share an apartment close to campus in the trap that is Olympia. Our building is old, a little run-down, and like many buildings in the pacific Northwest, has mold issues. It's painted dark green on the outside and has a rock facade that isn't fooling anyone. Jill's mother insists that we find somewhere else to live, but this place is cheap, the location is convenient, the size is good, and despite the mold and mediocre management it's actually kind of a nice place in some respects. We're sort of out in the woods, so it's quiet. Although we're on the ground floor, nobody harasses us. It stays cool because we're surrounded by so many trees and sometimes we get to watch random wildlife in the back. There's a few college students who live in the complex so once in a while there's a party or something that can be annoying, but... yeah.
We've spent like the past two years or so accumulating a bunch of stuff that we really don't need so moving would be annoying. Also, again, price and location are nice. I'm also unusually and irrationally resistant to change. -_-
2) What I do
I recently quit a job as an office manager at a local software company that wrote and sold security programs. After spending about a month there they offered me more responsibilities, since apparently I seem like someone who is capable of a lot more than just secretarial stuff. So instead of the just-a-rung-above-receptionist job I started with, I became technical support / office manager / receptionist. My pay, however, did not increase. I raised a fuss about it and didn't get what I wanted, so I quit. They weren't able to find a replacement despite my two weeks' notice, so I offered to stick around until a replacement could be trained... as long as they tripled my pay. To my surprise they agreed (with some caveats - I had to have perfect attendance while training or the triple would only become double) and I made a lot of money really fast. I also got the benefit of leaving on good terms.
Shortly after I started working as a courier as a couple-run title and closing company in downtown Olympia. Again, about a month in, they decided that I wasn't being used to my full potential, and offered some other positions that seemed to match my skill set. While I like the idea of making more money, I don't like the idea of taking on more stress. The courier position is nice because I just kind of drive around on my own, listen to music in my car, and have a lot of time to think to myself between mail stops. (I go from Olympia to Lacey to Tumwater and back again) I'm now also working as a file clerk and archivist in the same company. Again, more time to myself, (No annoying calls like at the last job) and I can work at my own pace. There's a dress code at the new place, (they're moving towards being more of a professional, conservative company rather than the small business they used to be) and there's a possibility that I may have to cut my hair again (meh) but overall it's pretty comfortable. I do miss some of the things at the old job though, like the lack of dress code (folks would go shoeless and wore Threadless t-shirts 75% of the time) and the free food, (As office manager I also stocked our office with enough lunch-food to feed the office every day, in addition to ordering office supplies) but the new place also has the benefit of having a higher women : men ratio. (1:5 at the old job, more like 3:1 at the new one.)
It's not glamorous, it's not my first choice, and I'm not changing the world, but I'm comfortable, generally complacent, and am able to put a little money away towards buying a house, or something.
3) Who I am
Yup, still a nerd. Even worse so now. My girlfriend and I play a massively-multi-player online game together. A lot. Our computers are set up right next to each other in our spare bedroom and we spend most of the time that we're not working, sleeping, eating, (in her case, going to school) or visiting family playing said game. We've developed relationships with some interesting people, and even drove down to southern Oregon to visit some a few weeks ago. No, we didn't die or get raped. It was a very fun time.
I still want a sex change. Some days it's worse than others, but always the worst in the summer. Money is still an issue. I haven't been spending a lot of time or energy pursuing it - mostly just longing for it. I don't cross-dress as much as I used to, (Another luxury lost by changing jobs) and feel that my body is changing in ways that make it more difficult to be passable. Anxiety is probably my biggest road block, aside from money. Also, distractions. (See above)
I think those are like my two most defining categories that I can slot in to. Nerd and Transomething. (I just made that up! Isn't it great?) I guess I'm also Asian, decreasingly athletic, failed intellectual (or something) um... yeah. I still play soccer with my dad and brother in a co-ed league some weekends, but aside from that my exercise is at like an all-time minimum. (Unless you count sex? But even then...)
So basically, yeah. That's... about the size of it. Putting it all down like that is kind of... depressing? I'm a year out of college and haven't really done anything. I mean, I'm getting by. We're getting by. It's kind of a transitional period we wait for Jill to graduate and *then* we can really decide what we want to do / where we want to go, but she wants to be close to family and I can't wait to get farther away. Maybe like Portland or something would be a nice compromise. Far, but not too far... and way better than Olympia from what I hear.
Things were just a lot more interesting once upon a time. I recently read a short story featuring Neil Gaiman's Shadow character from American Gods. It was in this Fantasy compilation that's been sitting in my car literally for like four years that I'd never bothered to look at closely. It was good, but made me sad. So much of what I see reminds me or something I've read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?