December 25, 2004, 22:40
....so x-mas didn't go so well this year.
yesterday dad and i rented some movies and we were in the middle of napoleon dynamite when mom, who is very drunk, starts getting dad to do shit for her. he's brought in some wood from the backyard and dad and mom argue some, lightly, as mom has dad start lighting a fire. mom says that dad shouldn't be here (as in this house) because he "gave up his life here". i deliver the message to dad since mom muttered it under her breath when dad wasn't near, he tosses the matches down and says she can light her own damn fire and leaves.
not much later i end up lighting the fire because i was afraid mom would light the house on fire, she was so drunk. i get pissed because mom mopes around the house crying.
most likely in this situation, mom is upset about dad leaving even though she wanted him to. she bawls on and on about how she and dad couldn't work out or whatever. mom has a terrible tendency to assume that, in every position imaginable, she is the victim. she cries so loudly, it's comical. if i weren't so angry about her doing it i would've found it funny. laughed out loud.
anyway, i go into my room because i haven't finished wrapping my presents (yeah yeah on xmas eve) and i'm in the middle of wrapping my last present -- mom's, ironically -- when the doorbell rings. i thought it'd just be kelly, but when i open the door, i see a family, and in the dark of the night i did not recognise them, i thought they were carollers or something. i noticed it was my neighbors from down the street. they asked if my mom had left about twenty minutes before. i noticed at that moment that mom hadn't made a sound since i'd been giftwrapping, so i answered she probably did. my neighbors informed me that a car resembling a black camaro, like my mom's, had hit their son's truck and kept going. as in just left. a hit and run. they then narrowly missed a van and i think another car.
of course i knew immediately that it was mom who had done it. they asked if mom had been drinking, and i said that she had, and she was upset too. i tried calling her phone and dad's, since the only place i thought mom would go would be dad's, but neither would pick up. le neighbors said the police were sitting down the street and that she shouldn't come home anytime soon because they'd at least get her for leaving the scene of an accident and, of course, a dwi/dui.
after a lot of apologizing, embarrassment, and thank-yous my neighbors returned down the street and i frantically called mom and dad's cell phones, but neither would pick up. i got really scared, because normally dad picks up his phone, and after a while mom's phone wouldn't ring and just cut straight to the answering machine. during the time i was trying to call them i had stepped outside to try to see what was going on, and one of the police had pulled up in my driveway either because they saw me or was told the address or both. i talked to the policeman, told him everything slowly and cleary, and then another pulls up and i repeat myself. i gave them dad's address so they could find mom. they leave, i go inside because i can't see and it's cold.
i was frightened and crying and tried to think of who to call, i didn't want to worry g.g. in case of a false alarm, so i thought of carol and robin. i couldn't remember carol's number so i punched in robin's, and when she aswered my outrageous panicking lead to the first thing out of my mouth -- SOMETHING REALLY BAD HAS HAPPENED. which sounds like someone's dead or mortally wounded. thanks to paranoia, that was my exact thought. i told robin everything and she came home immediately with waldo, and i explained everything again only slower and clearer and more detail.
i then suggest we go to dad's, as it's really the only thing we could do. there are police running up and down the street when we arrive, and one pulls off from the side of the road, according to robin, and they were parked next to dad's.
we spot mom's car in dad's driveway, pull up, and robin gets out. dad isn't home but robin sees mom on dad's porch and starts yelling at her. mom is so drunk she can barely stand. robin yells more. she makes mom get in her car and drives her home. more yelling. robin asks where dad might be and as we pull up in our driveway mom says where she thinks dad is. i'd rather not repeat it. i've barely calmed myself down by this time but that was the final straw for the night, the second robin opens her car door i push my way out from the back seat because i can't stand being in the same hemisphere as mom at this moment. i go in the house and robin, waldo, and mom come in a little after.
things happen, more yelling, g.g.'s called and is talking to mom. mom hangs up on her. robin tells mom that she's staying next door at g.g.'s, mom refuses, robin says we arent staying if she is. as the three of us leave the house and shut the front door on mom it actually tugs on my heartstrings. i felt like we were abandoning her, that she didn't know any better, that she was just a child, she didn't deserve this. but nothing in that last sentence was true. i knew it but i am not emotionally calloused so it was still hard to do.
we stayed the night at waldo's. i am extremely thankful for his family's hospitality. it was really nice staying there. i felt better but had no appetite for the rest of the night into this morning. i was starving but when i ate i wanted to throw it back up. i ate as much as i could stand.
thing is, that was only yesterday. it was the worst of it, but today didn't prove to be very xmasy either.
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yesterday dad and i rented some movies and we were in the middle of napoleon dynamite when mom, who is very drunk, starts getting dad to do shit for her. he's brought in some wood from the backyard and dad and mom argue some, lightly, as mom has dad start lighting a fire. mom says that dad shouldn't be here (as in this house) because he "gave up his life here". i deliver the message to dad since mom muttered it under her breath when dad wasn't near, he tosses the matches down and says she can light her own damn fire and leaves.
not much later i end up lighting the fire because i was afraid mom would light the house on fire, she was so drunk. i get pissed because mom mopes around the house crying.
most likely in this situation, mom is upset about dad leaving even though she wanted him to. she bawls on and on about how she and dad couldn't work out or whatever. mom has a terrible tendency to assume that, in every position imaginable, she is the victim. she cries so loudly, it's comical. if i weren't so angry about her doing it i would've found it funny. laughed out loud.
anyway, i go into my room because i haven't finished wrapping my presents (yeah yeah on xmas eve) and i'm in the middle of wrapping my last present -- mom's, ironically -- when the doorbell rings. i thought it'd just be kelly, but when i open the door, i see a family, and in the dark of the night i did not recognise them, i thought they were carollers or something. i noticed it was my neighbors from down the street. they asked if my mom had left about twenty minutes before. i noticed at that moment that mom hadn't made a sound since i'd been giftwrapping, so i answered she probably did. my neighbors informed me that a car resembling a black camaro, like my mom's, had hit their son's truck and kept going. as in just left. a hit and run. they then narrowly missed a van and i think another car.
of course i knew immediately that it was mom who had done it. they asked if mom had been drinking, and i said that she had, and she was upset too. i tried calling her phone and dad's, since the only place i thought mom would go would be dad's, but neither would pick up. le neighbors said the police were sitting down the street and that she shouldn't come home anytime soon because they'd at least get her for leaving the scene of an accident and, of course, a dwi/dui.
after a lot of apologizing, embarrassment, and thank-yous my neighbors returned down the street and i frantically called mom and dad's cell phones, but neither would pick up. i got really scared, because normally dad picks up his phone, and after a while mom's phone wouldn't ring and just cut straight to the answering machine. during the time i was trying to call them i had stepped outside to try to see what was going on, and one of the police had pulled up in my driveway either because they saw me or was told the address or both. i talked to the policeman, told him everything slowly and cleary, and then another pulls up and i repeat myself. i gave them dad's address so they could find mom. they leave, i go inside because i can't see and it's cold.
i was frightened and crying and tried to think of who to call, i didn't want to worry g.g. in case of a false alarm, so i thought of carol and robin. i couldn't remember carol's number so i punched in robin's, and when she aswered my outrageous panicking lead to the first thing out of my mouth -- SOMETHING REALLY BAD HAS HAPPENED. which sounds like someone's dead or mortally wounded. thanks to paranoia, that was my exact thought. i told robin everything and she came home immediately with waldo, and i explained everything again only slower and clearer and more detail.
i then suggest we go to dad's, as it's really the only thing we could do. there are police running up and down the street when we arrive, and one pulls off from the side of the road, according to robin, and they were parked next to dad's.
we spot mom's car in dad's driveway, pull up, and robin gets out. dad isn't home but robin sees mom on dad's porch and starts yelling at her. mom is so drunk she can barely stand. robin yells more. she makes mom get in her car and drives her home. more yelling. robin asks where dad might be and as we pull up in our driveway mom says where she thinks dad is. i'd rather not repeat it. i've barely calmed myself down by this time but that was the final straw for the night, the second robin opens her car door i push my way out from the back seat because i can't stand being in the same hemisphere as mom at this moment. i go in the house and robin, waldo, and mom come in a little after.
things happen, more yelling, g.g.'s called and is talking to mom. mom hangs up on her. robin tells mom that she's staying next door at g.g.'s, mom refuses, robin says we arent staying if she is. as the three of us leave the house and shut the front door on mom it actually tugs on my heartstrings. i felt like we were abandoning her, that she didn't know any better, that she was just a child, she didn't deserve this. but nothing in that last sentence was true. i knew it but i am not emotionally calloused so it was still hard to do.
we stayed the night at waldo's. i am extremely thankful for his family's hospitality. it was really nice staying there. i felt better but had no appetite for the rest of the night into this morning. i was starving but when i ate i wanted to throw it back up. i ate as much as i could stand.
thing is, that was only yesterday. it was the worst of it, but today didn't prove to be very xmasy either.
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