application ♦ witchesreign ♦ complete
Name: Annwyd
Journal: annwyd
Contact: Annwyd Hates You (AIM)
Character Name: Fenris
Series: Dragon Age II
Gender: Male
Age & Canon Point: Fenris's age is never stated in the game, and indeed he has no idea of it himself thanks to his existing memory loss. It can be assumed he's in his mid-twenties at his current canon point, which is near the end of his Act 2 companion quest, A Bitter Pill, just after he kills Hadriana and walks out on the party temporarily in despair and fury. For the purposes of the game, let's say he's 26, but he could easily pass as several years younger if he did decide to pick up and join SeeD.
Requested Sponsor: N/A.
Entry position (Cadet, SeeD, Instructor, other): Other. Fenris will be taking odd jobs around Garden to begin with; I'd like for him to eventually settle into a sort of grudging "lifeguard" position at the training center, helping to keep monsters in check if they threaten to grow too much in number and rescuing students who get in over their heads or get KOed while fighting there. If necessary, or if that won't be possible, I can come up with other things for him to do as well.
History: Wiki link here.
Abilities & Physical Abnormalities:
1. He's an elf. Pointed ears, vaguely exotic features, slim build.
2. He has magical tattoos that give him a) the ability to enter an insubstantial, wraith-like state in which he can phase through objects and resolidify his body or body parts at will; b) the ability to unleash a stunning, damaging burst of magic known as a spirit pulse while in the aforementioned state; and c) a partial (and only partial) resistance to magic.
Personality:
It's easy to look at Fenris, with his spiky armor and perpetual scowl, and come away with the message that he's a shadow composed of nothing but bitterness and hate. This is not entirely incorrect: the bitterness and hate certainly make up a lot of what's going on with him. But it's not everything. Spend a little while talking to him and something more will emerge: a savage, bleak pride in his compromised and tattered honor and the strength he's finally been able to turn to his own purposes in life. That's also not everything...but it's a good enough place to start, better than the rage.
Fenris holds the world at bay with that aloof pride. Raised without any formal education (to the point where he is in fact illiterate), he nevertheless interacts with people with a cultured, knowledgeable decorum and manners. His demeanor is measured and cynically calm, not with any real serenity but with something more like the lid on a simmering pot that could erupt into a boil any time. While to most people he's nothing but a quiet and ominous ghost, when he does bother to speak he tends to be dry, a little lofty, and frequently sarcastic. He's far from as humorless as one would expect from a man with his presence, but his humor is usually grim and sardonic. And all of this--the surprising depths of knowledge that he possesses, the peculiar and dark politeness draped like a veil over his vicious ideals, the bleak confidence in his abilities--is stolen from his former masters.
It's not completely illusory, but that grim surface betrays an interior that's soft in strange ways. The unexpected kindnesses are one thing, and anyone could see them coming with enough knowledge of the sort of sad and abused person he is. The occasional predilection to vice is quite another. When Fenris's apparently iron self-control slips, it does so quick and hard. He may drink out of desperation, gamble foolishly, or otherwise exercise poor judgment and surprising self-indulgence. He doesn't know how to treat himself in a healthy way. He's never had the chance to learn. He'll only come close to admitting this among friends, though--people he trusts and respects. No one else is allowed to see him show any weakness or vulnerability. That would strike flaws in the armor he puts between himself and the world.
The pride isn't just for keeping other people at a distance, though. It's also for keeping his own anger in check. And that, on a level deeper than the pride, is what drives him. He's been abused in ways both large and small for his entire life that he can remember (and even the fact that he can't remember a time before then is a testament to those abuses). Now that he's finally free, he's left with unending rage and hatred at the people who hurt him and stole everything from him. It devours him. He channels it, back in his own world, into a philosophy of absolute intolerance of magic and its practitioners, those being the people who held power in the Tevinter Imperium where he was enslaved. Fenris has thought up a hundred excuses for this hatred based in logic, reason, and experience, because if he's just acting out of hate, then they've won, because he's allowed them to define him. Sometimes he even believes that reasoning and can pretend that he has noble goals behind his hatred.
Other times, he knows that it's a lie. He can't control the rage, and it isn't noble: it's just the lashing out of a wounded beast with nowhere near as much control over himself as he pretends he has. Deep down, underneath first the pride and then the anger, is nothing but self-loathing: he thinks he has allowed his former masters to reforge him completely, to remake him emotionally as they did physically when they branded his skin. Everything he is now is because of them. His attitude he stole from them, the strength he's proud of is their product, his driving rage they planted in him. And he hates it. He despises himself for it.
As far as Fenris is concerned, that's where everything that he is ends: with an acknowledgment of his emotional and spiritual defeat at the hands of the magisters and the deep bitterness he feels for it. He clings, here and there, to things that he hopes are untainted--a line from the Chant there, an expression of kindness here--but it's never enough. He'll always be his old master's wolf and nothing more. Even in his victories against them, he's letting them win.
It's not true. There is more to him. Under all his hatred, he isn't really that bad. There's still something in him of the boy who, unbeknownst to the man who's forgotten it all, sacrificed himself to free a family he loved. In fact, he still holds family as his highest value, the one thing that truly drives him beyond even his hatred, although he wouldn't dare admit it freely. When his consuming rage doesn't stand in the way, he'll be kind to the weak and oppressed. When he respects someone, he'll be loyal to them and place their well-being above his own happiness, not just because he hates himself but also because there's still a shred of selflessness in him. And deeper down inside than he allows himself to look, he's lonely. He desperately wants the family he loved but can't remember having. But he's given up hope of ever having it again.
What are your plans for the character in-game? He plans to be a jerk and tell everyone how stupid and dangerous this para-magic business is while skulking around Garden and looking for ways to get home at every opportunity. I plan for him to develop relationships that help him open up a little while exploring the game's world and maybe learning that there's more to life than hate.
Anything else? Fenris is a difficult character to integrate into games, especially one like this that focuses so much on being willing to join up with a larger force. I'll be attempting to get him involved in things against his will if need be. Given a choice, he would have nothing to do with Garden at all, but he wants to get home, and they seem to have the largest concentration of people and power that could help him find out how to do that.
Complete TWO out of the FOUR options.
i) IC Questionnaire (can be found on the application page)
What do you prefer to be known as? It doesn't matter what I prefer. My name is Fenris.
How old are you? Why bother asking? You have no way of knowing if the answer is true. Twenty-two.
Do you have any history in combat? ...Yes.
If so, have you ever killed? Yes.
i) How do you feel when you get involved in some project that calls for immediate and rapid activity? I go if it's needed. It doesn't matter how I feel.
ii) Do you organize and initiate leisure activities? No. "Leisure activities." Do I look like a whorehouse madam to you?
iii) What role do you take when working in a group? I don't work in a group. [Pause. Reluctantly:] I do what needs to be done, and without complaint. But only if the leader deserves my respect.
iv) How talkative are you around other people? I'm not.
v) What three things would you want to have with you on a desert island? State your reasoning. A ship. So I could leave. Is this a trick question? I don't succumb to trickery.
vi) Is it important to be liked by a wide range of people? No.
vii) When the odds are against you, is it worth taking a chance? No, you-- [A pause, a jerk of his head.] Yes. Some things are necessary.
viii) Do you consider yourself to be an impulsive person? No. I do not take my decisions lightly.
ix) Would you agree that planning things ahead takes the fun out of life? "Fun"? [He scowls.] It doesn't matter.
x) Do you like surprises? Where is this going? Don't try to surprise me.
xi) Do you sometimes wonder if there is something wrong with you? What do you expect me to say? This question is useless. No. I don't wonder about those things.
xii) Do you consider yourself to be smarter than your superiors, and disagree with their decisions? I do not have superiors. If I did...that depends. Are they smart? Do they make good decisions?
xiii) Lastly, how do you feel about cabbages? [Long pause.] Cabbages are better than fish.
ii) Prose sample (can be general or a response to the post's prompt).
iii) Bracket/Commentspam RP sample (can be general or a response to the post's prompt).
iv) Thread link