i have the usual mundane thoughts, and i have irrational, anxiety-driven fantasies (this week's involved being forced to lick a razor, straight up. it only becomes more terrible. a gang-member had his tongue cut out before he was stabbed to death behind my mom's gallery in SJC on the train-tracks. i still think about it--it's gut-sickening and ( Read more... )

i have a new piece brewing in my head. earlier i discussed the idea of loss in humidity. i like the idea of experiencing the pain of absence when the air is so thick and it feels like there is matter encasing you ( Read more... )

i'm supposed to be "organizing" my room but i'm too stoked on this pleasure forever album to create a negative association with it ( Read more... )

oh, summer. i think my ass is invisibly sewn to the precise spot that i am currently sitting on ( Read more... )

i'm researching alcoholism and it's hyper-depressing.

oh, and um. thrust or bust.

before i forget: i saw jordan catalano and either kevin bacon or kevin bacon's extreme doppelganger on avenue a (was it a? or b.). this is the second time i have seen jared leto in person. the other time, it was at a sonic youth/bikini kill show when i was thirteen. i touched his hand and ran away. this time we merely made eye contact. he looks ( Read more... )

i am leaving nyc today. i'm really depressed today and while i know i can attribute at least a part of it to leaving jeralyn, but i don't think it's entirely that ( Read more... )

p.s. today i was informed that the iowa writers' workshop--my dream grad school--is harder to get into than harvard medical.

i need to spend the next two years writingwritingwriting and readingreadingreading.

BPL, here i come.

first of all, i went here: http://www.kabalarians.com/gkh/your.htm#links. thank you, jasmine ( Read more... )

so i'm in nyc till tomorrow afternoon. tonight is a satc party and possibly luna lounge to get drinks with carolyn, yoanne, and alison ( Read more... )