[fanfic] Unspeakable
Title: Unspeakable
Type: AU, one-shot
Genre: Romance
Pairing: Nichkhun/Wooyoung/Taecyeon
Words: 5000+
It's not easy to tell someone you love them.
A/N: Inspired by a scene in an anime I'm watching right now! Turned out to be somewhat long after all. Enjoy! Did this out of the blue so I hope you like it! ^^
“I love you, Wooyoung.”
“I told you to stop saying that."
“Why do you keep running away from me?”
*******
There was a commotion in the lobby and the students were crowding around the noticeboard. It was the first day of school and the dormitory postings were just pinned up. Wooyoung squeezed through the crowd and stood beside another taller student as he scanned the paper for his name.
Jang Wooyoung (Form 2) - Nichkhun Horvejkul (Form 4)
What a strange name, thought Wooyoung. He wondered what kind of person he was.
“Are you new here?” asked the taller boy next to him. Wooyoung turned, slightly startled at the sudden intrusion, but he nodded. The boy was tanned, much taller than himself and had messy black hair.
“I’m in Form 2, but I just transferred here. I’ve never been in a boys’ boarding school before.”
“Welcome, then! I guess I’ll be your classmate. My name is Taecyeon,” the boy smiled and offered a hand. Wooyoung took it eagerly, glad to make a friend in an unfamiliar environment. “I see that you’re sharing a dormitory with Nichkhun sunbae.”
“H-How did you know?” asked Wooyoung, slightly surprised.
“You’re wearing a name badge, silly.”
“Oh!” Wooyoung exclaimed, before blushing to the roots of his hair.
“There’s some time left for you to move in to your new rooms before classes start. Good luck with Nichkhun!”
“Good luck? W-Why?”
“W-ell,” Taecyeon hummed, as if debating whether to continue. Wooyoung stared at him wide-eyed with anticipation, almost a little afraid at what he might hear. “Nichkhun sunbae’s quite the legendary figure in the school, especially now that he’s in his senior year. He represents the school for science competitions and always wins every time. He’s been topping his level for every exam since Form 1. His family is wealthy and he can speak at least three languages fluently.”
“Okay…? That doesn’t sound too bad!”
“But he has almost no friends whatsoever. He doesn’t talk much to anyone, and there’s just something about him that scares everyone off. Usually we don’t switch roommates throughout our 4 years of school, but every semester without fail, his roommate would ask for a transfer. Nobody really knows whether he’s just arrogant or shy or plain unsociable, but whatever it is, he’s like the pinnacle that nobody wants to go near.”
Wooyoung stared at Taecyeon with a crest-fallen expression. Great. Just great.
*******
Wooyoung sat on the chair nervously. He had already unpacked his things, but there was still another hour or so before class started. Sooner or later, he’d have to meet this legendary but scary senior that Taecyeon had told him about, and he frankly was not looking forward to it. There was the sound of shoes clicking along the passageway outside. Wooyoung gulped as the door handle turned and it slowly opened. Wooyoung sprang up from his chair.
“Hello! My name is Jang Wooyoung!” he yelped a little too eagerly as a fair-skinned boy walked in, his school blazer slung casually over his shoulders like a model. He was tall, had a rather slender frame, and a better looking face than Wooyoung had expected. Truthfully, he had imagined him to look like an arrogant nerd, but Nichkhun was far from it. His eyes were cold, granted, but it didn’t seem to stem from any inherent perception of self-superiority. His round eyes that could’ve made him look more friendly were presently staring at Wooyoung in some surprised displeasure. Wordlessly, he let himself into the dorm and closed the door.
“I… I’m from Form 2, I just transferred here today! I’m sorry I unpacked my things first, I didn’t know which bed you wanted but if I’m fine with changing if you want!” Wooyoung continued, though he felt his enthusiasm being slowly replaced by that paralyzing intimidation that Taecyeon had warned him about. Nichkhun didn’t answer him, but only walked towards the empty bed, set his bag on it and began to unpack.
Wooyoung scratched his head perplexedly. He stared at Nichkhun, who was robotically folding his clothes into neat piles, pretending that Wooyoung wasn’t there.
“Please… please don’t ignore me,” Wooyoung couldn’t help saying now that he was at the end of his tether. He stared intently at the ground, unwilling to make eye contact. Nichkhun froze mid-action, and turned around. Wooyoung continued in a flustered way, “If you don’t like something I’m doing, just let me know and I’ll stop doing it. I just hope that our lives won’t be so miserable at least for this semester while we’re sharing the same room.”
There was a long pause. Wooyoung felt his face heating up. He wondered if he had crossed the line in being so straightforward.
“I don’t like people touching or rearranging my books. Also, I’m always in a bad mood in the morning,” Nichkhun finally spoke up for the first time. Wooyoung’s face lit up merely for the fact that he had managed to solicit a reply from Nichkhun and he looked up at him with an expression of undisguised delight, nodding fervently.
“I hope we will get along well for the rest of this semester!” Wooyoung said cheerfully, grinning and tilting his head. Something in Nichkhun’s eyes wavered a little, before he nodded slightly and returned to unpacking.
*******
“So how has it been?” asked Taecyeon, smiling cheekily at Wooyoung one day during lunch. School was almost a two weeks in by now, and Wooyoung hummed a song as he scooped more mashed potato into his mouth.
“How has what been?”
“Living with Nichkhun sunbae.”
“Mm, it was difficult at first,” Wooyoung began chewing on a carrot. “But he seemed to loosen up after a while. I just have to remember to always be out of his way in the morning, because he’s really in his foulest mood then. Other than that, he’s all right. We even talk about non-school-related things sometimes.”
Taecyeon stared at him with some surprised confusion. “You… had a conversation with Nichkhun sunbae?”
“Yeah. It wasn’t much, but at least I found out a little bit about his family, and why he’s always so antisocial.”
Taecyeon’s eyes widened. He nodded slowly as he chewed on his rice thoughtfully. “That is an unheard of situation, Wooyoung.”
“Really? Well, I’m glad that he’s OK with me as a roommate then. I’m really too lazy to transfer anywhere after the semester.”
Taecyeon nodded, but his thoughts were clearly still dwelling on the same subject.
*******
Wooyoung threw his pencil on his workbook in frustration as he slumped back in his chair. Nichkhun looked up from his book in surprise.
“Hyung, how do you even like Maths?” Wooyoung asked. He was always the one initiating conversations, it seemed. At first it was difficult getting a reply out of Nichkhun, but by now, he seemed to be used to it.
“It’s formulaic and brainless,” muttered Nichkhun as he looked back to his book. Wooyoung had realised that Nichkhun wasn’t the sort of person that rattled on and on without getting any point across., but rather chose the fewest but most precise words to convey his meaning.
“Brainless? Really, hyung?! Calculus is going to drive me up the wall soon,” Wooyoung whined as he took up his pencil once more. Behind him, he could hear Nichkhun closing his book and silently walking towards the study desk. He looked down at the workbook from behind Wooyoung, one hand supporting himself on the edge of the desk. Wooyoung had never been so close to him before and found himself feeling a little unsettled inside.
“What’s the problem now?”
“Uhm. Question 2.”
Nichkhun read the question, took up the pencil and began to explain to Wooyoung where he had gone wrong in his working. Between Nichkhun’s steady voice, his close proximity and the smell of his freshly-laundered clothes, Wooyoung barely listened to anything he was saying.
“Do you get it?” asked Nichkhun. Wooyoung snapped back to his senses.
“Huh? Uhhh…”
“Have you been listening?”
“Not really…” Wooyoung mumbled sheepishly, feeling a little guilty. Nichkhun smacked him gently on the head before he proceeded to re-explain the question. This time, Wooyoung forced himself to pay attention even though Nichkhun’s smell kept threatening to overwhelm him everytime. When Nichkhun was done, Wooyoung exclaimed in revelation.
“I get it now, thanks, hyung!” he said as he eagerly scrawled down the working. Ruffling Wooyoung’s hair, Nichkhun walked back to his bed and resumed his book. After Wooyoung was done solving the question, he turned around to face Nichkhun and said, “Hyung, you know, I think people misunderstand you a lot.”
“Does it matter?” Nichkhun didn’t look up from his book.
“No, I guess. But it’s such a shame that people think you’re so cold when you can be really nice when you want to be!”
“That’s the point, isn’t it? I don’t want to be nice to necessarily everyone and just anyone.” Nichkhun raised his eyes to look at Wooyoung. Wooyoung looked at him, but didn’t know how to interprete this statement.
“Still!” Wooyoung pouted in defiance. Nichkhun couldn’t help but smile in amusement. It was the first time Wooyoung saw him amused at anything. “I do believe this is the first time I’ve seen you smile, hyung. You really should smile more often, frowning gives you wrinkles.”
“I don’t care about wrinkles.”
“Well, smiling makes you look about ten times better than you usually do then!” Wooyoung threw his hands up in exasperation as he went back to his workbook. He didn’t manage to see just how wide Nichkhun’s smile became after that.
*******
“Welcome ba -” Wooyoung was about to greet as the door opened but he was instead surprised to see Nichkhun enter the room soaking wet. “Hyung! Did you get caught in the rain?”
Leaping to his feet, Wooyoung drew out one of his own towels from the cupboard. He threw it around Nichkhun’s head, pulling it down as he toweled his hair like a mother would, though Nichkhun was taller than him. Nichkhun didn’t resist. After his hair was sufficiently dry, Wooyoung began to unbutton Nichkhun’s shirt, only to have Nichkhun pull his shirt away from Wooyoung’s grip.
“What are you doing?!” he tried to shriek, but his voice was hoarse from his walk in the rain.
“Helping you change your shirt? We’re all boys here, what’s there to be shy about?” Wooyoung protested. It was an interesting observation to him that he didn’t feel weirder doing this, mothering Nichkhun like this. It felt comfortable and natural, somehow, even though Nichkhun was two years his senior and had, just three weeks ago, been the most intimidating person Wooyoung had ever met. Nichkhun seemed to blush, but Wooyoung couldn’t tell for sure with all the hair motted across his face.
The tips of Wooyoung’s fingers brushed against Nichkhun’s damp skin as he unbuttoned his shirt, button by button, trailing his way down his chest towards his navel. When the shirt was unbuttoned, he peeled the wet layer off Nichkhun, dumping the wet garment into the laundry basket. In a matter-of-fact way, his fingers reached for Nichkhun’s belt and had already half-undone them when suddenly, Nichkhun’s hand grabbed his.
“Wooyoung, you don’t want to go there,” Nichkhun’s voice was soft and oddly strained.
“What?” Wooyoung raised his head, oblivious to the awkwardity of the situation, He found himself staring into Nichkhun’s eyes, molten with emotions, as a slight frown appeared on his face.
With his spare hand, Nichkhun grabbed the tip of Wooyoung’s chin and tilted it upwards. This wasn’t what Wooyoung was expecting, as he felt his breath catch in surprise. He didn’t - or couldn’t - resist. “Hyung…?” he whispered, though he felt frozen in this position, like he didn’t want to leave. Even when Nichkhun’s face came nearer. Even when Nichkhun’s damp hair tickled his cheeks. Even when he could feel Nichkhun’s warm breath moistening his lips.
Nichkhun kissed him, and Wooyoung felt like his world stopped spinning.
It was the first time Wooyoung felt like he had completely lost control of himself. He had never known that it was possible to become intoxicated by a person until now. While Nichkhun’s lips were still caressing his, his tongue sliding over his, his thin slender fingers slipping underneath his shirt to explore every inch of his back, his hands tracing the contours of his chest and his waist - as long as all this was happening, Wooyoung was completely and irrevocably drunk. He could think of nothing else but wanting more. His fingers ran through Nichkhun’s hair, pressing his face against him as Nichkhun licked an excruciatingly slow line down the middle of his chest, below the navel, and lower, and lower.
Later, Wooyoung was twisting the fabric of the bedsheets, tilting his head upwards as he gasped for breath. He cringed in pain at some points, but his expression would then abruptly changed to that of pleasure. There was a thin layer of sweat on both their bodies as they moved in urgent rhythm, desperate to bring each other to the climax. From time to time, Wooyoung couldn’t help whispering Nichkhun’s name, somehow enjoying the sweetness of it in his mouth during this moment of coupling.
With a throw of his head backwards and a choked cry, Wooyoung felt himself hitting the peak almost at the same time as Nichkhun. The euphoria was like nothing Wooyoung had ever experienced before, and he felt himself being washed away by it like a tidal wave that he has no defence against. He was suspended on the most ecstatic tenterhooks for a few moments, but then the feeling began to ebb. Wooyoung exhaled and closed his eyes.
He felt the bed sink down as Nichkhun fell beside Wooyoung, exhausted. But then, Nichkhun suddenly turned to draw him into a hug, nuzzling his nose in the nape of Wooyoung’s shoulder. “I love you,” he whispered sleepily, his usual stoic voice filled with emotion even then, with his eyes closed. But Wooyoung’s eyes snapped open, as if he had just been brought back down to hard reality.
*******
Life changed drastically after that.
Nichkhun continued being his usual reticent self, but it seemed that now he had realized and was openly acknowledging his feelings for Wooyoung. He’d wait for Wooyoung outside his last class, go for dinner with him before they went back to their dormitories together. Wooyoung had joined dance classes with Taecyeon in school, and when it ended too late, Nichkhun would come all the way down to the school dance studio and walk him back to the hostel. Though he never did any of this in an ostentatious manner, his motives were only too evident to Wooyoung and everyone else around them.
“You didn’t have to come,” Wooyoung said, looking at the sniggering boys behind him in some embarrassment. Taecyeon smiled in an amused way as he waved them goodbye.
“Why not?” Nichkhun asked, as he automatically lifted Wooyoung’s dance bag out of his hand and carried it for him.
“People will… talk…” Wooyoung bit his lips.
“So let them talk,” Nichkhun said in his soft, calm manner. “You know I love you.”
“Shhh!” Wooyoung put his fingers to his lips, flustered. “We’re still in public! Stop saying that.”
Nichkhun gave him a sideways smile but they continued the rest of their walk back in silence.
The semester was almost over by now, and it had been more than a month since they had first slept together. That wasn’t the last time it happened - in fact, no matter how many times Wooyoung told himself he needed to stop, he’d find himself unable to resist Nichkhun before the week was over. He never once felt like he could control himself, and never lost that feeling of complete intoxication when Nichkhun was near, much to his despair and confusion. But when he wasn’t with Nichkhun, all the feelings of confusion and embarrassment came back to him. While Wooyoung was unable to reconcile himself with the idea of being attracted to another guy, Nichkhun had seemed to willingly surrender himself to his emotions. Time and time again, Nichkhun had told him that he loved him. He knew he meant it - Nichkhun was so reticent that Wooyoung knew he never said anything unless it was truly necessary - but still, Wooyoung never quite knew what to say in reply, and often felt embarrassed more than anything.
“So it seems like Nichkhun sunbae is really interested in you,” Taecyeon remarked casually over lunch one day.
“What?! N-No… we’re just friends,” Wooyoung started stabbing his food with his fork in some nervousness. “He’s just… a very good… sunbae to me.”
“He actually bothers talking to you, he bothers to come pick you up after class and after dance… In all my two years in this school, Nichkhun has never even come close to doing that for anyone,” Taecyeon went on, his eyes twinkling at Wooyoung in amusement.
“I… well…” Words failed Wooyoung at that moment as he blushed furiously. Taecyeon laughed and ruffled his hair.
“Don’t worry, it’s just the whole school talking about it.”
“What?!”
“I told you Nichkhun sunbae was a legendary figure. Why wouldn’t people notice when he starts to pay attention to someone when he hasn’t done that before?”
“Oh my god,” Wooyoung muttered as he slumped his head onto the lunch table, squeezing his eyes shut. Could things get any worse?
“Hey, if all the stuff with Nichkhun makes you feel uncomfortable, I could walk you back to the dorms after class today so he doesn’t have to come,” Taecyeon offered. Wooyoung looked up in delight.
“Thank you!” Wooyoung breathed in gratitude. He didn’t know why he felt so uncomfortable with having such a public ‘scandal’ with Nichkhun. Taecyeon smiled back at him.
*******
The door opened just as Wooyoung and Taecyeon reached it. Nichkhun was standing on the other side of the doorframe and he stared at the two of them as they walked up together. They had just been laughing about something, and Taecyeon had his arm on Wooyoung’s shoulder.
“Good evening, sunbae,” Taecyeon greeted formally, his eyes twinkling with meaning. Instantly, Wooyoung felt something amiss in the atmosphere between them, as Nichkhun stared at him with narrowed eyes. He made no answer.
“Uh, thanks for walking me back, Taec! See you tomorrow!” Wooyoung hurriedly said as he pushed Nichkhun into the room, waved goodbye to Taecyeon and closed the door.
“Stay away from him,” Nichkhun warned as soon as the door was shut.
“What? Why?” Wooyoung frowned as he began to take off his blazer.
“Can’t you see he’s trying to move in on you?” Nichkhun yelled in exasperation.
“What?!” Wooyoung exclaimed, turning around to face Nichkhun. His expression was dark with anger. “Don’t be ridiculous, Taecyeon’s been my friend since the first day of school.”
“So you can’t see it? How are you going to protect yourself if you go on being so naïve like that?”
“Why are you stifling my high school freshman experience?! When did I even belong to you anyway? You don’t own my life,” seethed Wooyoung, his voice quivering in fury. Nichkhun stared at him. “Stop telling me who I can and cannot hang out with, especially when we’re not officially anything in the first place.”
As soon as he said it, Wooyoung felt a tinge of regret. Nichkhun’s mouth parted in surprise and something fell in his face, but he didn’t reply. The rest of the night was spent in cold silence.
*******
In the following days, they talked minimally. Nichkhun didn’t avoid Wooyoung nor did he deliberately ignore him, but it was like he had decided to retreat. He no longer picked Wooyoung up after class, nor did he come down to the dance studio anymore. Wooyoung had imagined that he would feel liberated when this happened - hadn’t he wanted this all along? - but he felt nothing but guilt. There was something about the emptiness of the corridor outside the classroom and outside the dance studio, after his activities, that pricked him and his conscience. He knew he should apologize for what he had said to Nichkhun in a pique of anger, but he wasn’t sure how. What would he say? That he loved Nichkhun too? Did he love Nichkhun? He simply couldn’t bring himself to say it.
“How come Nichkhun sunbae hasn’t been coming all of this week? Is he sick?” asked Taecyeon after dance practice one day, in the empty dance studio as they were doing some cool-down stretches. Wooyoung’s face suddenly hardened as he looked away from Taecyeon.
“No, he’s fine,” Wooyoung didn’t know how to go on. Taecyeon didn’t seem like he wanted to probe into the issue further either.
“Since Nichkhun sunbae isn’t here, I’ll walk you back to your dorm as usual then?” Taecyeon offered. Wooyoung smiled back and nodded gratefully, though he still felt a little uneasy after being reminded of Nichkhun’s continued reticence. Now that Nichkhun had all but gone back to treating him as he would to any other junior in the school, Wooyoung hadn’t realized how much he enjoyed being the special someone that Nichkhun paid attention to. He hadn’t realized how much he missed hearing Nichkhun say he loved him almost everyday, even though Wooyoung never once replied.
Taecyeon stood up. “Let me go and refill my water bottle first before I walk you back.”
By the time Taecyeon got back to the dance studio, Wooyoung seemed to have curled up into a ball and fallen asleep on the wooden floor of the studio. Taecyeon looked down at Wooyoung sleeping soundly, his chest heaving up and down steadily. There was an air of innocence about him most of the time, but it was only when he was sleeping that it really showed. Taecyeon crouched down and his fingers brushed across Wooyoung’s cheek and over his lips. A small smile played across his lips.
Ring, ring! Wooyoung’s cell phone began to ring inside his bag, but it didn’t seem to wake him from his exhaustion. Taecyeon retrieved the phone and flipped it open.
“Hello?”
“Who’s this?” came Nichkhun’s voice over the phone, tinged with a tone of alarm.
“This is Taecyeon.”
“Where is Wooyoung?”
“Don’t worry so much about him, he’s sleeping soundly next to me right now.”
There was a pause at the other end of the phone. “Excuse me?” Nichkhun’s voice turned deadly soft.
“We’re in the dance studio. Are you going to come? But then, maybe it’s better if you don’t…” With that, Taecyeon hung up, a ghost of a smirk on his face.
*******
Nichkhun burst open the doors of the dance studio, only to see Taecyeon sitting on the floor drinking water.
“Where is he?” Nichkhun demanded. Taecyeon smiled and stood up.
“He’s still sleeping,” Taecyeon said simply as he walked towards Nichkhun. He was two years younger, but he was visibly taller than the other, and was of a bigger build.
“Where - is he?” Nichkhun hissed as he narrowed his eyes. Taecyeon didn’t answer his question but only continued talking.
“You know, one of best friends in my first semester was your roommate at the time. Everytime he’d come and tell me stories about how scary you were, and how you could strike fear into his heart without even doing or saying anything,” Taecyeon began to pace slow circles around Nichkhun like a predator. Nichkhun stood frozen but all his senses were on high alert.
“It got so bad sometimes that he’d come crying to me. Imagine that, a well-built teenage boy crying because he couldn’t handle your coldness. It got so bad, he didn’t just transfer out of the dormitories, he transferred school all together. I lost the first friend I had in this school and because of that, I started to hate you. I hated you and your arrogance. I hated that you could effortlessly win all those academic competitions. I hated that you were so legendary without even trying.”
“Even if you hate me, that has nothing to do with Wooyoung,” Nichkhun interrupted.
“You don’t quite understand me, do you? I said I hated you. I didn’t say I hate you now,” Taecyeon stopped in his tracks in front of Nichkhun. There was a poignant pause as Nichkhun tried desperately to read Taecyeon’s possible next move, but he couldn’t find any answers between the hard brown eyes and the half-smirk on his face.
“You can say that my hate turned into an obsession, which turned into admiration. And after Wooyoung came along, it turned into something even stronger than that,” Taecyeon’s voice lowered into a whisper. He edged closer to Nichkhun. “It turned into jealousy. Of the bitterest kind. Soon, I had to admit to myself that I fell in love with you.”
Nichkhun raised his arms to push him away, but as if anticipating such a move, Taecyeon grabbed his arms and slid a leg behind Nichkhun’s, pulling him and using Nichkhun’s own momentum to trip him onto the floor. He was now pinning Nichkhun onto the floor with his body weight, his hand immobilising both of Nichkhun’s with an incredible strength.
“And do you think doing this will make me return the feelings?” Nichkhun hissed as he struggled under Taecyeon’s weight.
“Well, isn’t that how you forced Wooyoung the first time?” These words struck hard and deep into Nichkhun. He stopped struggling, as a self-satisfied smile creeped on Taecyeon’s face. At the sight of Nichkhun being visibly stunned by this statement, Taecyeon chuckled. “I’m right, aren’t I? I could tell just by watching the two of you. You acted on your own impulses, slept with him without knowing, or even caring about whether he loved you back. If you think I'm despicable, just remember I’m just doing what you did to Wooyoung. You slept with him first, and then you tried to make him love you. Didn’t you? Didn’t you?”
Nichkhun didn’t answer. Taecyeon’s words were hatefully replaying over and over in his head. He couldn’t deny it; he had started being attracted to Wooyoung from the first day he met him, and he had as good as made Wooyoung sleep with him that night when he got caught in the rain. Without any further resistance from Nichkhun, Taecyeon continued, “I know you love him. But does he love you? How do you know? He’s never said it back to you, has he?”
This time, Nichkhun knew he was right. Wooyoung had never said it back to him, and though Nichkhun had always thought he was just shy about it - but had he assumed too much? Nichkhun didn’t notice when Taecyeon’s hand slipped under his shirt and began to explore his torso, across his abs and over his chest. “Wooyoung may not know what he’s missing, but I do. If it didn’t work for you and Wooyoung, maybe it’d work for me,” Taecyeon lowered his face once more towards Nichkhun. “Just sleep with me tonight, and later, I’ll make you love me too.”
Nichkhun didn’t move. He didn’t even feel it when Taecyeon kissed him, pushing his lips apart with his velvet tongue, or when his fingers began to deftly undo the buttons on his shirt, before sliding down underneath the rim of his pants. His brain was now only replaying what Taecyeon had just said.
Isn’t that how you forced Wooyoung the first time?
You slept with him first, and then you tried to make him love you.
I’m just doing what you did to Wooyoung.
You love him but…
Does he love you?
Nichkhun closed his eyes and swallowed a lump in his throat, realising that he didn’t know the answer to this question. “I’ll make you love me,” whispered Taecyeon hotly into his ear before he moved down towards his neck.
*******
“Stop it!” came a cry from the corner of the dance studio. The storeroom door had finally been unlocked and forced open and Wooyoung stood in the doorway. Both Taecyeon and Nichkhun looked up. It was evident from the tear stains down his cheek that he had been crying. Before either of them could make any moves, Wooyoung stormed over to them and shoved Taecyeon off while pulling Nichkhun to his feet.
“I love him, OK!?” Wooyoung yelled at Taecyeon, his voice echoing around the dance studio. His hand clutched tightly around Nichkhun’s wrist. “I love him, I just haven’t gotten round to telling him that yet, so stop assuming that I don’t! Were you using me all along just to get closer to him? I thought I could’ve trusted you, Taec!” With a sound of disgust, Wooyoung grabbed his dance bag and pulled Nichkhun towards the doors of the dance studio.
With one last glance of the most vehement disgust at Taecyeon, Wooyoung shouted, “Don’t even fucking try to move in on him ever again because he’s mine!” He slammed the door shut.
Wooyoung broke into a desperate run, pulling Nichkhun along, as if he wanted to put as much distance between them and Taecyeon as possible. He didn’t stop running until they were both safely inside their dormitory again. Wooyoung closed the door, panting heavily as he threw his dance bag onto the floor furiously.
“You damned idiot!” he shouted at Nichkhun, suddenly beginning to cry all over again. “You keep telling me to protect myself, and look at the great job you’re doing to protect yourself! If I hadn’t managed to escape that storeroom in time, what do you think would’ve happened to you?!”
Wooyoung fell into a convulsion of crying and panting. Nichkhun could only engulf him tightly into his arms, feeling his smaller body shaking with his sobs as he rubbed his back comfortingly. He had thought he had been happy enough with Wooyoung in his life, but he now felt a bliss that he had never experienced before, despite that momentary period of hopeless doubt in the dance studio. He sniffed Wooyoung’s neck adoringly and ran his fingers through his hair. Wooyoung cried even harder.
It took close to 15 minutes for Wooyoung to calm down sufficiently. He wiped his tears on the shirt on Nichkhun’s shoulder like a little boy. Nichkhun couldn’t help but chuckle. Noticing suddenly that Nichkhun’s shirt was half unbuttoned, Wooyoung attempted to button it up for him with a vehemence as if he resented that it had been unbuttoned by a person that wasn’t him. Nichkhun held onto his hand. “Thank you,” he said simply. Wooyoung looked up at him with confusion in his swollen eyes.
“What for?”
“For whatever you said just now.”
Blushing, Wooyoung looked back down and continued to button Nichkhun’s shirt as he talked. “I did mean it though. I don’t want to share you with anyone else. I’m already boiling mad that Taecyeon got to kiss you too, so you better brush your teeth ten times over before letting me kiss you again.”
Nichkhun snorted and grinned at him. Wooyoung had never seen him look so emotional and - happy before. “What about the other part?”
“What… what other part?” Wooyoung gulped audibly.
“The part before you asserted that I’m your exclusive possession in front of Taecyeon.”
"Uhm…” Wooyoung hummed and bit his lips. Nichkhun waited for a while, but it didn’t seem like Wooyoung could traverse the barrier today. He smiled understandingly as he pulled him into another hug.
“It’s OK if you just don’t like saying it. I can live with knowing it.”
“I love you,” Wooyoung mumbled on Nichkhun’s shoulder, before blushing even deeper. It was as cheesy as he had thought it would be, but there was also another more uplifting feeling of liberation that he had not expected. Nichkhun froze for a few seconds before he pulled Wooyoung away, and beamed down at him with an expression of purest bliss, his eyes curved up into an eye-smile that Wooyoung had never known he had. This new, happy Nichkhun was unexpectedly ten times more attractive than the one he had fallen in love with, and Wooyoung felt like he wanted to keep him that way.
“I love you too,” Nichkhun whispered as he stroked Wooyoung’s cheek with his thumb. As he bent down, Wooyoung’s eyes fluttered close but all of a sudden, he pushed Nichkhun away.
“Ya! I told you you need to brush your teeth first before you kiss me, I’m not going to indirectly kiss Taecyeon!”
Nichkhun laughed. “So if I rinse my mouth ten times with mouthwash, will you finally let me kiss you?”
Wooyoung paused before saying a little shyly, “I’ll let you kiss me and do other things.”
It took Nichkhun a few split seconds to digest this hint, before he bolted away to get his toothbrush.