College Life
So I was thinking this morning, about college. It was not at all what I planned. I don't know what exactly I planned, but it wasn't this. I never saw girls flashing, or (excluding that one night at the strip club) saw any 'fun' body parts of any girl I wasn't dating. I never got so wasted I couldn't remember the next day, nor in fact did I ever get wasted at all. I did not go on a roadtrip, or any trip of any kind. I never had any random hook-ups, or tried any experimental drugs. I didn't fall in love, or find a my dream job. In fact, I didn't do any of the things you see in movies.
But I did come to terms with my life. And I have realized that, when all is said and done, this stage of my life was just that. a stage of my life. Much like high school, it shall pass, and I will remember it as little more than something I had to do. Of course, there are a lot of things I did here that I know I never would have done otherwise. I'm sure I never would have gone to a play of my own free will, and I never would have realized how annoying drunk people are. I never would have learned the folly of the permanent undergrad, or of the graduates who refuse to leave.
There are some things I just learned sooner than others, like how some friends are only conveniences, and others are barely friendly. I have been stabbed in the back and stabbed in the front. I've discovered I'm not as nice as I thought I was, but I am still better than most people. I have made some good friends and have found out that, generally, I am one. I have eaten at places I never would have known about. I have ordered food at four in the morning. I have taken advantage of 24 hour restaurtants. I have walked through the drive-thru. I have been judged by the color of my skin. I have discovered that racism is not dead.
I have learned that you find friends in the oddest places, and that human behavior often makes very little logical sense. I have learned that I am not the only person who thinks like me, or who shares my beliefs. In fact, I learned what my beliefs are. I learned who I am. People have always said I have no sense of style, and that's not true. I just have my sense of style, which is not one I ever found in Detroit, where I had to pretend to fit in... leaving myself in that awkward place between who I want to be and who I have to be. I have discovered that wearing a suit is not all that bad, and that not dressing up can be just as fun.
Did I enjoy myself? Well, yes. I had a girlfriend for two years, who I often speak negatively of but really, she wasn't that bad. I've met some great people, probably 10 of whom will talk to me after I graduate, and 3 of whom will actually remain friends. I camped outside a store, completely unprepared, to buy a video game system. I've walked farther in one trip than many people do in a month. I made people cry, I made people smile. I dismantled and put away my childhood, and took pictures. I found out that I really am a good person. I've learned how much difference one word can really make. I know the value of physical contact. I know what love is, and sadly it's usually just an overused word. I've learned that I have an Eastern view of Good & Evil. I have discovered my taste in music.
Am I ready for the real world? No, but I have accepted that. I could have come straight out of high school, or even less than that, and found a job. I could have worked for minimum wage and struggled my whole life. Now I have gone to college. I have mulitiple bank accounts, and will graduate with no debt, and roughly $2500 in savings. I will have a temporary place to stay, and will work on getting my license. But more importantly, I know that I do not need to be rich to be happy. I can work a minimum wage job (especially now that it's going up) and be completely satisfied. I have the financial know-how to be financially stable. And I know I will never work for minimum wage. I will never have to. Am I ready for the real world? No, but I need to get out of here.
But I did come to terms with my life. And I have realized that, when all is said and done, this stage of my life was just that. a stage of my life. Much like high school, it shall pass, and I will remember it as little more than something I had to do. Of course, there are a lot of things I did here that I know I never would have done otherwise. I'm sure I never would have gone to a play of my own free will, and I never would have realized how annoying drunk people are. I never would have learned the folly of the permanent undergrad, or of the graduates who refuse to leave.
There are some things I just learned sooner than others, like how some friends are only conveniences, and others are barely friendly. I have been stabbed in the back and stabbed in the front. I've discovered I'm not as nice as I thought I was, but I am still better than most people. I have made some good friends and have found out that, generally, I am one. I have eaten at places I never would have known about. I have ordered food at four in the morning. I have taken advantage of 24 hour restaurtants. I have walked through the drive-thru. I have been judged by the color of my skin. I have discovered that racism is not dead.
I have learned that you find friends in the oddest places, and that human behavior often makes very little logical sense. I have learned that I am not the only person who thinks like me, or who shares my beliefs. In fact, I learned what my beliefs are. I learned who I am. People have always said I have no sense of style, and that's not true. I just have my sense of style, which is not one I ever found in Detroit, where I had to pretend to fit in... leaving myself in that awkward place between who I want to be and who I have to be. I have discovered that wearing a suit is not all that bad, and that not dressing up can be just as fun.
Did I enjoy myself? Well, yes. I had a girlfriend for two years, who I often speak negatively of but really, she wasn't that bad. I've met some great people, probably 10 of whom will talk to me after I graduate, and 3 of whom will actually remain friends. I camped outside a store, completely unprepared, to buy a video game system. I've walked farther in one trip than many people do in a month. I made people cry, I made people smile. I dismantled and put away my childhood, and took pictures. I found out that I really am a good person. I've learned how much difference one word can really make. I know the value of physical contact. I know what love is, and sadly it's usually just an overused word. I've learned that I have an Eastern view of Good & Evil. I have discovered my taste in music.
Am I ready for the real world? No, but I have accepted that. I could have come straight out of high school, or even less than that, and found a job. I could have worked for minimum wage and struggled my whole life. Now I have gone to college. I have mulitiple bank accounts, and will graduate with no debt, and roughly $2500 in savings. I will have a temporary place to stay, and will work on getting my license. But more importantly, I know that I do not need to be rich to be happy. I can work a minimum wage job (especially now that it's going up) and be completely satisfied. I have the financial know-how to be financially stable. And I know I will never work for minimum wage. I will never have to. Am I ready for the real world? No, but I need to get out of here.