It might kill me; I want it to be true
WHAT THE SHIT I WROTE FANFICTION.
Series: Kingdom Hearts (specifically, the end of 358/2 Days/beginning of KH2)
Characters: Roxas
He feels the weight of the Keyblades in his hands, and understands them to be the weight of promises. He does not try to puzzle out the meaning of them - these are not his promises. He merely carries them, as he merely carries this body and carries this soul for a heart that is not his. Memory of the promises would be left in that heart, and could only be delivered by the heart which made them. Even if he knew the story of the five-pointed star, chained like hope to one these blades, the meaning of it would be wasted upon him.
And so, Roxas finally understood. He hadn't hated people with hearts before, and still had no ability to. But the blades strained his shoulders, and with this burden he understood his weakness. He thought of Axel, and now knew why every promise from him had burned to ash. It was not for failure of memory. It was a failure of heart, of having no vessel with which to hold the weight of another person's dreams. The nets of a Nobody's spirit could barely sustain their own ambitions.
He draws his lips thin, grinds his teeth together. His own spirit strained, breaking, wanting to erupt in a storm rather than fade in a silent collapse. Wind whips around him, rustling his hood against his ears
(he hears not wind but waves breaking on a sandy shore, formed and destroyed in an instant)
and he pushes himself faster, farther down the streets, the tips of the Keyblades dragging on the asphalt and drawing sparks in his path. He knows how stupid he is, trying to leave meaningful tracks in this city built to be empty.
He knew what it meant not to have a heart. Because he, too, had not made a single promise he could keep.
30 Day Writing Meme! Stolen from Kol!
1. Tell us about your favorite writing project/universe that you've worked with and why.
2. How many characters do you have? Do you prefer males or females?
3. How do you come up with names, for characters (and for places if you're writing about fictional places)?
4. Tell us about one of your first stories/characters!
5. By age, who is your youngest character? Oldest? How about “youngest” and “oldest” in terms of when you created them?
6. Where are you most comfortable writing? At what time of day? Computer or good ol' pen and paper?
7. Do you listen to music while you write? What kind? Are there any songs you like to relate/apply to your characters?
8. What's your favorite genre to write? To read?
9. How do you get ideas for your characters? Describe the process of creating them.
10. What are some really weird situations your characters have been in? Everything from serious canon scenes to meme questions counts!
11. Who is your favorite character to write? Least favorite?
12. In what story did you feel you did the best job of worldbuilding? Any side-notes on it you'd like to share?
13. What's your favorite culture to write, fictional or not?
14. How do you map out locations, if needed? Do you have any to show us?
15. Midway question! Tell us about a writer you admire, whether professional or not!
16. Do you write romantic relationships? How do you do with those, and how “far” are you willing to go in your writing? ;)
17. Favorite protagonist and why!
18. Favorite antagonist and why!
19. Favorite minor that decided to shove himself into the spotlight and why!
20. What are your favorite character interactions to write?
21. Do any of your characters have children? How well do you write them?
22. Tell us about one scene between your characters that you've never written or told anyone about before! Serious or not.
23. How long does it usually take you to complete an entire story-from planning to writing to posting (if you post your work)?
24. How willing are you to kill your characters if the plot so demands it? What's the most interesting way you've killed someone?
25. Do any of your characters have pets? Tell us about them.
26. Let's talk art! Do you draw your characters? Do others draw them? Pick one of your OCs and post your favorite picture of him!
27. Along similar lines, do appearances play a big role in your stories? Tell us about them, or if not, how you go about designing your characters.
28. Have you ever written a character with physical or mental disabilities? Describe them, and if there's nothing major to speak of, tell us a few smaller ones.
29. How often do you think about writing? Ever come across something IRL that reminds you of your story/characters?
30. Final question! Tag someone! And tell us what you like about that person as a writer and/or about one of his/her characters!
1. Tell us about your favorite writing project/universe that you've worked with and why.
Holy craaaaaaaaaaap where to start. I think Gesma has lead to some of my most whole, completely formed characters, and I consider especially Vay and Liam to be incredibly inspired as far as my characters go. Kingdom is there too, for a very different reason: where Gesma's constraints helped me create brilliant characters, Kingdom's freedom has allowed me a bit more experimentation. Hurts to say it, but ANCD was also brilliantly inspiring to me, and was probably the single game responsible for forcing me to grow into what I am now.
For my own personal writing projects, hands-down Sleepers Awake has been my favorite so far. That was my attempt at YA, and while it was written six years ago and was a terrible terrible book technically, there is still a spark in it that somehow made it more alive than any other solo project I have written since then.
2. How many characters do you have? Do you prefer males or females?
Hm. Actively, I have Warren, Vay, Liam, Deon, Valentino, Rae, and Roimata. Six boys, one lady. (Galen, Julian, Bass, Kaz, and Mulli are still close to my heart, even if their games have died). For Restless Heavens I am looking at at least two female characters though, and if I do a second char for Arcadia, she will absolutely be a woman (which char I go for though, I have yet to figure out).
About seven years ago was when I made the switch from predominately playing female chars to playing predominately male. Part of this was because of my earliest RP experiences: I actually started out in Dragon Ball Z and Final Fantasy RPGs, which were male-player dominated games, and my female chars ended up stomped to shit there. So when I started in on the SM RPG circuit, probably unnecessarily I decided that I was done with that, and I'll start playing boys and I'd be free to do whatever I want. (Also, when you play a boy in SM games, you tend to have greater freedom of costume, which matters a lot to me).
I'm working on getting back to even ratios. I know I CAN write from female POVs, but I seem to have a hesitation to actually committing to my own female char. I honestly don't feel like male POVs are harder or easier to write than females, but I do think that it is harder to sell a female POV to an audience, which sucks and I'd like to work against that.
3. How do you come up with names, for characters (and for places if you're writing about fictional places)?
I am a SUCKER for meaningful names. First I determine what heritage I'm looking for, then when I skim through trusty old Behind The Name, I look at the meanings before I look at the actual name itself. Once I see a name that works, I stick with it, and normally don't have a problem with waffling on it.
I am also still pleased with how well my Sleeper's Awake naming system went - they were all named after alcohol XD
(Man, randomly, I am disappointed that I never got to use the name Matsushita Aoi, meaning 'hollyhock below the pine', with the imagery of a flower shadowed by darkness which was perfect for the character's intended position as Zoicite. Hopefully I get to reuse both the name and the character eventually.)
I try not to name places. I really suck at worldbuilding XD
4. Tell us about one of your first stories/characters!
FANFICTION-WISE: The first fic I ever put online, on fanfiction.net, was actually a story about Vegeta and Bulma's wedding (DBZ) when I was like, 13. I'm actually a bit surprised at the detail and depth I put in it (especially considering the source material I was working with). Also, sometime before that, I wrote an unfinished 100 page Sailor Moon/Dragon Ball Z crossover. The two bits I remember most clearly was my OC, Lysha, last Princess of the Saiyans and also Sailor Saiya, and the fact that Mamoru was learning healing techniques from Dende. What the fuck.
I think the first GOOD character I created for RP was Tertia, my Sailor Hera from an old Greek god SM game. She was the first character I created who was coherent, willful, passionate, and most importantly, operated on her own brand of logic. In my experience, when I've created a character who comes with his/her own set of special rules and logic, then I find that kind of character to be my most successful. The first time I really felt like I hit it out of the park with a char was with Galen, who was so beyond any character I had written before. Still, he's one of the characters I know and love best.
Series: Kingdom Hearts (specifically, the end of 358/2 Days/beginning of KH2)
Characters: Roxas
He feels the weight of the Keyblades in his hands, and understands them to be the weight of promises. He does not try to puzzle out the meaning of them - these are not his promises. He merely carries them, as he merely carries this body and carries this soul for a heart that is not his. Memory of the promises would be left in that heart, and could only be delivered by the heart which made them. Even if he knew the story of the five-pointed star, chained like hope to one these blades, the meaning of it would be wasted upon him.
And so, Roxas finally understood. He hadn't hated people with hearts before, and still had no ability to. But the blades strained his shoulders, and with this burden he understood his weakness. He thought of Axel, and now knew why every promise from him had burned to ash. It was not for failure of memory. It was a failure of heart, of having no vessel with which to hold the weight of another person's dreams. The nets of a Nobody's spirit could barely sustain their own ambitions.
He draws his lips thin, grinds his teeth together. His own spirit strained, breaking, wanting to erupt in a storm rather than fade in a silent collapse. Wind whips around him, rustling his hood against his ears
(he hears not wind but waves breaking on a sandy shore, formed and destroyed in an instant)
and he pushes himself faster, farther down the streets, the tips of the Keyblades dragging on the asphalt and drawing sparks in his path. He knows how stupid he is, trying to leave meaningful tracks in this city built to be empty.
He knew what it meant not to have a heart. Because he, too, had not made a single promise he could keep.
30 Day Writing Meme! Stolen from Kol!
1. Tell us about your favorite writing project/universe that you've worked with and why.
2. How many characters do you have? Do you prefer males or females?
3. How do you come up with names, for characters (and for places if you're writing about fictional places)?
4. Tell us about one of your first stories/characters!
5. By age, who is your youngest character? Oldest? How about “youngest” and “oldest” in terms of when you created them?
6. Where are you most comfortable writing? At what time of day? Computer or good ol' pen and paper?
7. Do you listen to music while you write? What kind? Are there any songs you like to relate/apply to your characters?
8. What's your favorite genre to write? To read?
9. How do you get ideas for your characters? Describe the process of creating them.
10. What are some really weird situations your characters have been in? Everything from serious canon scenes to meme questions counts!
11. Who is your favorite character to write? Least favorite?
12. In what story did you feel you did the best job of worldbuilding? Any side-notes on it you'd like to share?
13. What's your favorite culture to write, fictional or not?
14. How do you map out locations, if needed? Do you have any to show us?
15. Midway question! Tell us about a writer you admire, whether professional or not!
16. Do you write romantic relationships? How do you do with those, and how “far” are you willing to go in your writing? ;)
17. Favorite protagonist and why!
18. Favorite antagonist and why!
19. Favorite minor that decided to shove himself into the spotlight and why!
20. What are your favorite character interactions to write?
21. Do any of your characters have children? How well do you write them?
22. Tell us about one scene between your characters that you've never written or told anyone about before! Serious or not.
23. How long does it usually take you to complete an entire story-from planning to writing to posting (if you post your work)?
24. How willing are you to kill your characters if the plot so demands it? What's the most interesting way you've killed someone?
25. Do any of your characters have pets? Tell us about them.
26. Let's talk art! Do you draw your characters? Do others draw them? Pick one of your OCs and post your favorite picture of him!
27. Along similar lines, do appearances play a big role in your stories? Tell us about them, or if not, how you go about designing your characters.
28. Have you ever written a character with physical or mental disabilities? Describe them, and if there's nothing major to speak of, tell us a few smaller ones.
29. How often do you think about writing? Ever come across something IRL that reminds you of your story/characters?
30. Final question! Tag someone! And tell us what you like about that person as a writer and/or about one of his/her characters!
1. Tell us about your favorite writing project/universe that you've worked with and why.
Holy craaaaaaaaaaap where to start. I think Gesma has lead to some of my most whole, completely formed characters, and I consider especially Vay and Liam to be incredibly inspired as far as my characters go. Kingdom is there too, for a very different reason: where Gesma's constraints helped me create brilliant characters, Kingdom's freedom has allowed me a bit more experimentation. Hurts to say it, but ANCD was also brilliantly inspiring to me, and was probably the single game responsible for forcing me to grow into what I am now.
For my own personal writing projects, hands-down Sleepers Awake has been my favorite so far. That was my attempt at YA, and while it was written six years ago and was a terrible terrible book technically, there is still a spark in it that somehow made it more alive than any other solo project I have written since then.
2. How many characters do you have? Do you prefer males or females?
Hm. Actively, I have Warren, Vay, Liam, Deon, Valentino, Rae, and Roimata. Six boys, one lady. (Galen, Julian, Bass, Kaz, and Mulli are still close to my heart, even if their games have died). For Restless Heavens I am looking at at least two female characters though, and if I do a second char for Arcadia, she will absolutely be a woman (which char I go for though, I have yet to figure out).
About seven years ago was when I made the switch from predominately playing female chars to playing predominately male. Part of this was because of my earliest RP experiences: I actually started out in Dragon Ball Z and Final Fantasy RPGs, which were male-player dominated games, and my female chars ended up stomped to shit there. So when I started in on the SM RPG circuit, probably unnecessarily I decided that I was done with that, and I'll start playing boys and I'd be free to do whatever I want. (Also, when you play a boy in SM games, you tend to have greater freedom of costume, which matters a lot to me).
I'm working on getting back to even ratios. I know I CAN write from female POVs, but I seem to have a hesitation to actually committing to my own female char. I honestly don't feel like male POVs are harder or easier to write than females, but I do think that it is harder to sell a female POV to an audience, which sucks and I'd like to work against that.
3. How do you come up with names, for characters (and for places if you're writing about fictional places)?
I am a SUCKER for meaningful names. First I determine what heritage I'm looking for, then when I skim through trusty old Behind The Name, I look at the meanings before I look at the actual name itself. Once I see a name that works, I stick with it, and normally don't have a problem with waffling on it.
I am also still pleased with how well my Sleeper's Awake naming system went - they were all named after alcohol XD
(Man, randomly, I am disappointed that I never got to use the name Matsushita Aoi, meaning 'hollyhock below the pine', with the imagery of a flower shadowed by darkness which was perfect for the character's intended position as Zoicite. Hopefully I get to reuse both the name and the character eventually.)
I try not to name places. I really suck at worldbuilding XD
4. Tell us about one of your first stories/characters!
FANFICTION-WISE: The first fic I ever put online, on fanfiction.net, was actually a story about Vegeta and Bulma's wedding (DBZ) when I was like, 13. I'm actually a bit surprised at the detail and depth I put in it (especially considering the source material I was working with). Also, sometime before that, I wrote an unfinished 100 page Sailor Moon/Dragon Ball Z crossover. The two bits I remember most clearly was my OC, Lysha, last Princess of the Saiyans and also Sailor Saiya, and the fact that Mamoru was learning healing techniques from Dende. What the fuck.
I think the first GOOD character I created for RP was Tertia, my Sailor Hera from an old Greek god SM game. She was the first character I created who was coherent, willful, passionate, and most importantly, operated on her own brand of logic. In my experience, when I've created a character who comes with his/her own set of special rules and logic, then I find that kind of character to be my most successful. The first time I really felt like I hit it out of the park with a char was with Galen, who was so beyond any character I had written before. Still, he's one of the characters I know and love best.