Capoter Sur Quelqu'un -- pt. 4/4
I thought about it then and all the way up the mountain but I remained silent most of the trip. Every so often, José would shoot me a smile or admire something he had missed as we drove up Côte-des-Neiges to le Chemin Remembrance. We parked at Belvédère Camillien-Houde and made our way through a trail that looked private, tucked away by trees fresh in bloom. I hugged José closer as I realised no one was around, mimicking the ivy that grew across the trunks of the trees previously buried underneath mounds of snow. Everything seemed new.
"Let’s sit by the lake, Shelly," José pleaded, pointing in the direction of le Lac aux Castors, curling his fingers around my wrist and dragging me off the dirt paved trail.
"Shouldn’t we stay on the path," I asked, darting my eyes around looking for any chance we might get caught.
"You’re no fun, Shelly. C’mon, where’s your sense of adventure?"
I shrugged and chuckled lightly as I followed on his heels. He planted himself in the grass and tugged at me to collapse next to him. I sat next to him lazily in the shade of large trees that surrounded us. We were suddenly hidden from plain view and a feeling of incredible relaxation fell over me. I sighed happily as I gazed at the water undulate under the blue sky, reflecting the clouds that passed overhead. The warmth of the afternoon overwhelmed me as I sunk against the earth and looked over at José sprawled out next to me.
"What are you thinking, Shelly," José pondered as he trailed his fingers through my hair, smiling down at me before pressing a light kiss to my lips.
"Nothing... I’m fine, cher. Please. I’m happy right now. This is nice." I feigned as I kissed him back, drawing him closer until he relaxed taut against me.
"You just seem, seem pre-occupied. But..." He trailed off, cautious not to push anything and his head fell into my chest. I realised that if I didn’t tell him now, I might never. My breathing became staggered, nervous as I embraced him, fearing that the words would come out more a forced melody than a hymn that sung his glories. I knew what I had to do and that I would sing it from the rhythm reverberating from my heart.
"José, I am going to tell you this now," I murmured, "I just... I don’t know how to tell you." He gave me a long, concerned look breaking the harmony of my words and staggering my courage. I held my breath deep in my chest for a moment as I watched his curious eyes, searching for something, anything.
"I want to keep you. I want to be with you. My Théo, mon coeur, j’suis t’amoureux. I am in love with you." I exhaled slowly, unsure of the timing and tempo, I closed my eyes, squeezing him in my arms. He smiled and kissed me, nestling down against my body as I pondered in my head how the next verse would be written.
[Capoter Sur Quelqu'un is a Québécois phrase which means in English like to have a crush on someone. If anyone would like the full text without reading each part, I would be happy to post it in one long post. Thanks for reading!]