i wasn't going to do this, for lack of a final word. i shall attempt to address your message nonetheless. I don't deny anything. everything you have said here was a very plausible description of me,at least, the me last year. i have no excuses or anything, and i won't offer an apology since i tried that already. all i have to offer is a message of my own. a lot has happened since those months, so consider the possibility of change. yes i realize i did those things, but do i still do them? no. why? because it was fucked up. i realized my hypocrisy in the waning part of the year since your departure. furthermore, i am very glad you are who and what you are. it makes me happy to hear of your drug-free life and how well it is working for you. i, too have found a life suitable to my situation and i am very pleased with it. i recognize that who i was then was just feeding my miserable nature. now, i am just glad that you are happy now without me in your life, and i am happy as well. also, you are very right about blake and jen. jen used to
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