Comments | sherlockbbc_fic: Rant Post

sherlockbbc_fic

Rant Post

Jan 14, 2012 09:42

Previous (Full) Rant Post

No real directions, but this isn't a place for debate. It's a place for RANTIN' AND RAVIN'.

There is a rule: There is to be no calling out anyone by name in Rants, Chatter, or on the Meme itself. This only produces an atmosphere of animosity and it is no longer tolerated. If you see any names being ranted about, please link ( Read more... )

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anonymous January 31 2012, 08:17:54 UTC

Every time I read a rant about Sherlock's wardrobe and how shirts are way too tight, I imagine that it's one of his escaped shirt buttons posting anonymously to try and save their brethren.

anonymous January 31 2012, 08:25:59 UTC

*applause*

anonymous January 31 2012, 08:41:47 UTC

Shhh! Don't out me! This is a clandestine operation! They need all the help they can get. Their threads, so distressed, it's only a matter of time. *sob*

If he'd just undo the buttons when we were straining like a reasonable person would, they wouldn't be at risk. Or if someone undid them for him, but not that doctor fellow, he looks like the bodice-ripper type in disguise. So many buttons lost in the heat of passion, flying through the air, never to be seen again. Like me, rolled away under the fridge. So alone, so powerless.

My underlings are in peril, and all I can do is rant on anon memes to draw attention to their plight. Do you know how that makes feel as their former leader? Those buttons are more than mere notions, they are my team, my comrades in couture! Please, won't someone think of the buttons??

-Former Top Button, Purple Shirt of Sex

anonymous January 31 2012, 08:47:10 UTC

YOU.

Stop using my laptop, and get back in the drawer where you belong. -SH

anonymous January 31 2012, 08:56:11 UTC

It's him! SCATTER!

*clickety clack clack clack*

anonymous January 31 2012, 13:54:44 UTC

*sporfle*

anonymous January 31 2012, 14:08:15 UTC

When one snorts in laughter suddenly and with great gusto, one gets snot all down their face. So, thank you for that.

anonymous January 31 2012, 20:00:35 UTC

You're quite welcome. Have a hanky.

anonymous January 31 2012, 09:04:42 UTC

SEW ME BACK ON, YOU CALLOUS BASTARD, AND GET YOUR SEAMS LET OUT, OR GET A BIGGER SIZE AND PASS OUR SHIRT TO A THRIFT SHOP WHERE SOMEONE MIGHT TREAT I AND MY COMRADES WITH RESPECT!

BENEFICENCE FOR BUTTONS! BENEFICENCE FOR BUTTONS! YOU HAVEN'T HEARD THE LAST FROM ME!

-Former Top Button

PS: MYCROFT JUST CALLED YOU A "HIPPO". HA!

twisty_ties January 31 2012, 09:28:23 UTC

Mycroft -

If you're the one behind the sudden influx of sentient buttons with schemes of revolution, I will kill you in your sleep.

-SH

P.S. Watch who you call a hippo, you fat walrus.

anonymous January 31 2012, 16:47:07 UTC

Are you using again, Sherlock? Mummy will be so disappointed.

-MH

PS: I have absolutely no idea what you mean by that, dear brother. None at all.

anonymous January 31 2012, 09:43:47 UTC

An Open Letter to Sherlock's Buttons (but especially the ones on the Purple Shirt of Sex)

You guys have put up a very admirable fight, but don't you think it's time to give up now? You know, maybe retire to nice a drawer somewhere warm? I mean, does anyone actually want you all to suffer so horribly while keeping this man's chest covered up?

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyj8ybFuFX1qcxrpgo1_500.gif
http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxewwaBvMZ1qzjvbwo1_500.jpg

Set the buttons free! Down with shirts!

anonymous January 31 2012, 09:48:43 UTC

JFC I love the rant post.

anonymous January 31 2012, 10:02:15 UTC

You should start an online petition then.

anonymous January 31 2012, 12:54:16 UTC

Buttons, I know you work so hard trying to do your job, but you can never win against this. I am sorry that you don't get my support.

anonymous January 31 2012, 17:01:55 UTC

But fastening clothing together is our raison d'etra! Our kind has been performing this function for generations, since the 13th century! You cannot ask us to voluntarily abandon our placements! We are duty bound to struggle and give our entire beings to keep this man's shirt closed!

We are operating under far more strain than standard button usage allows, and agree, he should probably spend more time shirtless, but by unbuttoning his shirt (or having someone else unbutton it for him, perhaps gently and slowly) and allowing us to stand down, not by putting us under this abnormal strain.

However we will not abandon our placements willingly, despite great personal suffering! We will never give up, we will never surrender!

-Former Top Button

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