Well....
So I found out why my best friend isn't talking to me. I found this blog post on her MySpace page. It's only the part dealing with me.
"And the great part about this is realizing how few friends I have. I received more condolences and support from people I know over the internet than those I know in real life. That includes Sarah. Despite the fact that I have paid for everything that we do, have given her rides to all these things, helped her and blah blah blah she bitched out on me. I knew that I was going to be house sitting on the 21st an that Grandpa was going to die either sometime before or sometime after so I detained Sarah for help. Well, Kim had left the gas grill on outside and the smell was coming in. When the house keeper came on Tuesday, since Grandpa passed away on Saturday I had Sarah there on Sunday (and yet again her mom bitched at her to bitch at me to piss me off on Sunday), she told Sarah to call PNM and have it checked out. Despite the fact that it was inside and despite the fact that it was nothing at all (the guy even checked every boiler, etc. in the house and even tested the freaking gas gauge) Sarah called and freaked out her family and went home. That's right. I had to hear it from her Grandfather the condolences. He was shocked that she wasn't going to stay for me so that I could be with my family. This was the same day as the funeral. She calls getting me in a panic and I have to tell everyone that something horrible has happened and have to leave RIGHT NOW. No coat, no license, not a word about what's happening and I'm screaming down the freeway in my beat up car that can't go over 50mph without great strain on the freeway talking illegally on my cell phone because I'm pretty sure that my world is about to fully end. Imagine my grandmother has been up for the last six days because no matter how much of her medication she takes she's too anxious to sleep and having to see the panic in my air and not hearing from me for hours. Imagine a grieving family looking around to see yet somethign else going wrong. Imagine having to call everyone and telling them that it was nothing but that your friend bitched out on you. Not only bitched out but expected me to feel sorry for her for what happened as if I had done it. I told her I was sorry because that was the proper thing to do but I know that after such a thing I don't know that it's worth forgiving her. Since then she has texted me asking to go do stuff and not once have I heard so much as a, "Man I'm sorry that this has happened to you." Then I get an e-mail that she's worried about me and that I need to contact her. Fuck that shit. Seriously? No, I'm not alright. My whole world just took a very violent and deep nose dive and you bitched out on me unapologetically. The ONE TIME you could have helped me instead of me putting the miles on my car, instead of me paying or making our lunches, instead of me putting gas in my car, instead of me doing all this for you, YOU could have helped ME you bitched out. On what grounds should that be forgiveness? On what grounds can you say that you were in any danger when even the gas authority says that it was nothing? On what grounds should you feel that I should apologize to you? On what grounds should you expect me to continue doing anything at all for you? On what grounds do you feel entitled to anything that I have to offer, to give, to make? Absolutely none at all. No one has that right to ask it of me and no one will get it frome me--ever."
This started when I chickened out on the last night of a housesitting job after her grandfather died. The gas problem really scared me. I didn't want to stay that night.
I think she was unfair and over exaggerated some of her points. I have paid for things. I try and make it so she doesn't have to drive me places. I've always felt bad about doing that but she's never once said "no" to me. How was I supposed to know it was making her this mad? I know I should've done more, but how? I can barely drive. My mom won't let me take the car. I hooked her up with volunteer jobs. I just don't understand.
I said I was sorry for her loss the day I heard her grandpa died. But I didn't bring it up again. Was that wrong? I've never dealt with anything like this before.
What am I supposed to do?
"And the great part about this is realizing how few friends I have. I received more condolences and support from people I know over the internet than those I know in real life. That includes Sarah. Despite the fact that I have paid for everything that we do, have given her rides to all these things, helped her and blah blah blah she bitched out on me. I knew that I was going to be house sitting on the 21st an that Grandpa was going to die either sometime before or sometime after so I detained Sarah for help. Well, Kim had left the gas grill on outside and the smell was coming in. When the house keeper came on Tuesday, since Grandpa passed away on Saturday I had Sarah there on Sunday (and yet again her mom bitched at her to bitch at me to piss me off on Sunday), she told Sarah to call PNM and have it checked out. Despite the fact that it was inside and despite the fact that it was nothing at all (the guy even checked every boiler, etc. in the house and even tested the freaking gas gauge) Sarah called and freaked out her family and went home. That's right. I had to hear it from her Grandfather the condolences. He was shocked that she wasn't going to stay for me so that I could be with my family. This was the same day as the funeral. She calls getting me in a panic and I have to tell everyone that something horrible has happened and have to leave RIGHT NOW. No coat, no license, not a word about what's happening and I'm screaming down the freeway in my beat up car that can't go over 50mph without great strain on the freeway talking illegally on my cell phone because I'm pretty sure that my world is about to fully end. Imagine my grandmother has been up for the last six days because no matter how much of her medication she takes she's too anxious to sleep and having to see the panic in my air and not hearing from me for hours. Imagine a grieving family looking around to see yet somethign else going wrong. Imagine having to call everyone and telling them that it was nothing but that your friend bitched out on you. Not only bitched out but expected me to feel sorry for her for what happened as if I had done it. I told her I was sorry because that was the proper thing to do but I know that after such a thing I don't know that it's worth forgiving her. Since then she has texted me asking to go do stuff and not once have I heard so much as a, "Man I'm sorry that this has happened to you." Then I get an e-mail that she's worried about me and that I need to contact her. Fuck that shit. Seriously? No, I'm not alright. My whole world just took a very violent and deep nose dive and you bitched out on me unapologetically. The ONE TIME you could have helped me instead of me putting the miles on my car, instead of me paying or making our lunches, instead of me putting gas in my car, instead of me doing all this for you, YOU could have helped ME you bitched out. On what grounds should that be forgiveness? On what grounds can you say that you were in any danger when even the gas authority says that it was nothing? On what grounds should you feel that I should apologize to you? On what grounds should you expect me to continue doing anything at all for you? On what grounds do you feel entitled to anything that I have to offer, to give, to make? Absolutely none at all. No one has that right to ask it of me and no one will get it frome me--ever."
This started when I chickened out on the last night of a housesitting job after her grandfather died. The gas problem really scared me. I didn't want to stay that night.
I think she was unfair and over exaggerated some of her points. I have paid for things. I try and make it so she doesn't have to drive me places. I've always felt bad about doing that but she's never once said "no" to me. How was I supposed to know it was making her this mad? I know I should've done more, but how? I can barely drive. My mom won't let me take the car. I hooked her up with volunteer jobs. I just don't understand.
I said I was sorry for her loss the day I heard her grandpa died. But I didn't bring it up again. Was that wrong? I've never dealt with anything like this before.
What am I supposed to do?