The Hiko Lies
I was going to post this weekend, but I got very caught up in things! Mostly, I spent the weekend unpacking, watching stuff on YouTube (TMNT 2 is on YouTube in it's entirety!!), shopping at Costco (booooo no poptarts!!), and I have no idea what I did yesterday. XD Did I even leave the house?
So, some updates!
So my health has been up and down since the end of July. The good news is its NOT SERIOUS, the bad news is I need to chill out and watch what I eat and drink or I'll be sick. Happily, this will not kill me, and I seem to be doing pretty good. I have a good friend suffering from a similar problem, and that's made me feel so much better.
I may yet go see a hypnotherapist to try and hypnotize the crazies out of me. The legit crazies.
A lot of people may be interested to know that I am now cohabiting with the boy. We decided that we wanted to live closer, and eventually that just evolved into "we might as well live together, we are in love and this will save money." Now, I had reservations. Lots of them. And up through mid-February I was okay with that. Yeah, we'd never lived in the same city, but we survived the South Africa Fiasco (more on the later), and Christmas with my Family, and Golden Week last year together. With three big trips to test the waters of seeing each other CONSTANTLY, and frequent visits, I was cool with the idea of cohabitation.
Then my life exploded. My Grandfather passed away, my job was a struggle everyday, and I was under so much packing stress I more or less broke. I didn't have a job lined up yet either. I freaked. What if I didn't love him (ridiculous), what if we couldn't stand seeing each other all the time (only on the weekends), what if we just rubbed each other the wrong way? I totally panicked, my closest friends saw me frazzled and questioning the relationship and I freaked out. I was barely consoled by the fact that in a few weeks it would all be over.
But here we are. The panic is over, the move is over, I am in my second week of the new job and third of living with him. And you know what? I WAS CRAZY FOR NO GOOD REASON. Just being with the boy, I cannot believe I ever doubted how I felt for him. He really means the world to me. I love him and we totally made the right choice in living together.
Even if he doesn't like scary movies. Hahaha!
My old job....what can I say? Somewhere around October or November I realized: I love my students, but this is not for me. That was a hard thing to reckon with. Especially when I had to keep myself involved. My co-teacher failed me and never forgave me for getting sick. Before my diagnosis, I was constantly ill and just had NO energy or ability to function. I should not have been working, I should have been at a hospital, but for a month and a half I struggled with doctors and clinics and hospitals. I got ill at the end of July, and medicine wasn't really making me feel better until about the end of October. My votes her decided she'd had enough of me at that point, and while I don't entirely blame her (no one, not even me, really understands chronic illnesses), it was unfair of her to blame me for everything going wrong. She also took my ex-friend's side in the South Africa Fiasco. Which I will blame her for. I think it was entirely rude and unprofessional to compare me to someone who I could not be any less like, and to decide that because said ex-friend hated me, she hated me too.
In the end, I loved my kids very, very much. But I never should have been at that school for two years. That said? My students and their mothers loved me, and showered me with so much affection and love when I left.
I miss the kids and the job, but not the drama.
That's all for now. Next time, I will talk about the South Africa Fiasco, update on family stuff, and talk about the new job.
(Added note: I promise I'll post some happier thoughts next time!!)
Tata, my darlings!!
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