Comments | shimotsuki: [Kaleidoscope update] Taking Leave

shimotsuki

[Kaleidoscope update] Taking Leave

Oct 14, 2015 22:33

Well. When I first started plotting the HBP section of Kaleidoscope, I did not think it would take six whole chapters to get rid of Remus. ;) But as it turns out, from mousy hair to Remus's history with Greyback to tea and sympathy to Patronus changes, there were a few things that needed to be pulled into the story ( Read more... )

remus/tonks, kaleidoscope, hbp, stories

Comments 11

Well Done anonymous October 15 2015, 21:39:51 UTC

I've been following Kaleidoscope since the first appearances on Metamorphic Moon, but I've never commented before, I don't think. I just wanted to say that I admire you for sticking with this for so long, and it's really paying off. Each new installment or revision really strengthens the overarching story into one coherent whole. This is a great read and makes sense of Remus' (and Tonks') canonical oscillations, which is not trivial. Keep it up!

Re: Well Done shimotsuki October 15 2015, 22:54:00 UTC

Thanks so much for commenting! I'm happy to know that someone who has been following this series from the beginning is still reading -- especially these days, with the R/T fandom and LJ in general being so much smaller. (And especially since I'm such a slow writer, heh.)

I'm especially glad to hear that you think these stories help make sense of what we see of Remus and Tonks in canon, because that's a major goal I've had in writing! We see so little of their interactions in canon, and so from what we do see it would be equally possible to write them as having a very unhealthy relationship -- but that is obviously not the story I want to give them. ;) I really want the kind and competent, if diffident, Lupin from PoA, and the bright, cheeky, and (ha, again) competent Tonks from OotP, to stay part of their personalities all the way through, even when circumstances become difficult. I'm not sure we always see quite enough of that in canon...

Thanks again! :)

starfishstar October 16 2015, 01:01:00 UTC

I do love a Tonks who's upfront with Remus about her feelings and the reality of what he's putting them both through, not dancing around the awkwardness but laying it out clearly. I recently reread a couple of old R/T favorites by Sam Starbuck (copperbadge), and that was something that stood out for me in his fics, too.

UGH, Remus, trying to slip away in the night. But that's indeed so canon Remus, self-effacing to the point that it actually crosses a line over into being inconsiderate of others!

But then today there had been Poppy Pomfrey’s firm but gentle fussing after the transformation, and Harry’s spontaneous smile when Remus turned up at his birthday tea, and Molly and Arthur’s way of making him feel truly welcome in their home. Questions from Hermione, and jokes from the twins-That's how I think of him, too, trying SO HARD not to need anyone, but then even a little bit of kindness and friendship starts cracking that resolve, makes it hard to resist letting people in. Bodes well for him finally (one book later...) giving in to ( ... )

shimotsuki October 17 2015, 03:40:56 UTC

Thanks so much for reading and commenting -- especially since you're working on your own HBP fic. I know very well that feeling of not wanting to read anything too similar in timeline during a WIP! (Though from the hints you've dropped about yours, I suspect you've taken the werewolf pack in a very different and really fascinating direction; I'm really looking forward to that.)

But that's indeed so canon Remus, self-effacing to the point that it actually crosses a line over into being inconsiderate of others! -- That's one of the things I find so heartbreaking about Remus, that he does these disappearing acts and other things that hurt people, because it never occurs to him that anyone thinks he matters enough for it to be hurtful.

That's how I think of him, too, trying SO HARD not to need anyone, but then even a little bit of kindness and friendship starts cracking that resolve, makes it hard to resist letting people in. -- Exactly, and I think OotP year was one long span of Remus letting his guard down and letting people (hello ( ... )

starfishstar October 17 2015, 03:58:44 UTC

Heh, yeah, there's slight cognitive dissonance in reading someone else's version of something I'm also working on a version of at the same time... I think it helps that mine's basically done (just doing the final editing) so it's kind of too late to be truly influenced! And I can't *not* read something you post. ;-) Plus, I really appreciate and admire how unbelievably close and true to canon you are/were, even before JKR (for better or worse!) let us have a door into her brain by creating Pottermore. Reading your stories feels like reading the "this is the backstory JKR intended" version. Whereas I'm aware what I'm doing veers a bit off track - technically canon compliant, and as realistic as I can make it, but probably not quite true to what JKR intended, and I do know it. In some sense I guess I set out to write a (canon-compliant) fix-it, though I didn't think of it in those terms back then ( ... )

merryb87 October 16 2015, 03:39:00 UTC

Well I did need a good cry today! Well done as always. They way you write these two is always spot on and how I imagine it will go. The feelings, Tonks unwillingness to let Remus know exactly how she feels and how Remus pushing her away.

Just, well done, I love this series.

shimotsuki October 17 2015, 03:42:22 UTC

Heh -- sorry about the angst...but it is HBP, after all. ;) Seriously, thanks so much for reading and commenting. I really appreciate the encouragement!

huldrejenta November 4 2015, 13:04:15 UTC

I really love the way you so neatly and seemlessly change POVs, and how we get to see both Tonks' and Remus' side of things. Tonks' frustration is palpable (and who could blame her??), and it's painful to see how Remus struggles, how he genuinely wants what's best for her, how convinced he is that the best for her is that he keeps his distance (and tbh, I'd probably be somewhat reluctant to enter a relationship if I knew I could put the other person in danger, in one way or the other).
I also love the glimpses we see of the party at the Burrow, of the kids playing (Hermione's nervousness and how she plays for Harry's sake made me smile), and the way Molly is making certain that Remus knows what she feels about it all.
Oh, and Tonks showing Remus the changed Patronus! Of course Remus has a different explanation than the obvious one...
Really lovely read, as usual! ♥

shimotsuki November 8 2015, 01:23:11 UTC

Thanks so much!

I'm glad to hear that the switching POVs works for you here. I may be a little too addicted to that technique -- but it really is fun to look at things from more than one perspective. (Next chapter we stay in Remus's head the whole time, lol.)

And yes, one of the things that makes Remus so compelling (and heartbreaking) as a character is that he has real reasons for being reluctant to be with Tonks. She thinks the risks are worth it, but the risks are real, and it's very like Remus to deny himself even something he wants so much when he doesn't think it's the right thing to do.

gilpin25 November 5 2015, 17:00:53 UTC

This is so late, and I'm sorry!

I'm impressed by how complete a story this is: it's not just Remus finally leaving for his mission, but the background of Cornwall and Tonks visiting the cottage, as well as the alternating POV, make it feel real and vivid and fresh to read. And that's really impressive, because 'The Leaving Scene' is one that nearly all R/T writers tackle, and there's usually a few elements that almost naturally appear in an effort to tie in with canon. But you've given it all a fresh twist.

Talking of which, as a reader, I sometimes find myself waiting for the 'I don't care' arguments, and yet here you've got Tonks coming right out and telling him, several times, that she loves him. She's upfront and honest, and literally putting him on the spot (go girl!), but she's giving him such little room for manoeuvre (or to think clearly, if he even could) that I can understand why he flees at the end. She doesn't realize she's battling the habit of a lifetime as well.

My favourite lines are: “I will wait for you, for ( ... )

shimotsuki November 8 2015, 02:26:44 UTC

There's no such thing as a late comment, you know -- and anyway, this was perfectly timed for a birthday present! :)

I'm really happy to hear you thought this felt like a complete story, because it started life as a timeline problem. ;) There are more than two weeks between the tea-and-sympathy scene and Harry's birthday party. But I didn't want to just write two weeks of "I don't care" arguments, and I wanted to give Remus a way to delude himself into thinking he's going back to "just friends" while keeping with the HBP Kaleidoscope theme that he's trying to avoid letting Tonks touch him, ever. Hence the Cornwall mission and the owls.

I actually thought Tonks would have to show Remus her Patronus before his mission, so he would recognize it if she had to send him a message. But it's very true that -- as you say -- at this point in the story Tonks thinks she has to do everything she can to win Remus over now. She's throwing everything she's got at him, all at once...which may not have been the wisest approach, heh ( ... )