Some more Down the Shinobi's Path rewrite
Alrighty, I still feel like I am talking to myself, but you know whatever. Here is some more of chapter 1 of Down the Shinobi's Path.
shinithemegami.livejournal.com/5989.html#cutid1 (Link to the first part of chapter 1)
Akiyama-chan twisted in her seat to look at Ren, a big, cheerful smile plastered across her face and waved. Heat crept, once again, across Ren's cooling face and he reburied it in his folded arms. Inwardly, he berated himself, he could have at least waved back But he had not and, somehow, he just knew this was all Hiro-nii's fault too.
It was not long after that the bell signalling the start of class rang and in walked a man wearing the standard dark blue Konoha fatiques and green flak jacket, a single clipboard in hand.
"Alright," Ueda Shizuka-sensei called as he made his way to the front podium, "everyone in your seats and settle down!"
It took a minute, but the room eventually grew silent. Everyone was so excited today, Ren could practically feel the air hum with it. It made him feel slightly uncomfortable.
Shizuka-sensei's smiling hazel eyes swept over his students' faces. "Right then, how about we start things off with one last lecture," he began, a decidingly mischievous grin spreading across his face, "for old time's sake."
Shizuka-sensei's suggestion was met with the expected reply of hisses and boos from his students. Ren could not decide, when he finally looked up at their sensei from his arms, if the look on Shizuka-sensei's face meant he was joking or being serious. He got his answer soon enough.
"Actually, you are still my students until later this afternoon," said Shizuka-sense over his students' booing, tone taking on a note of seriousness, as he ran a hand through his close cut light brown hair, " so you don't really get a choice in whether you want a lecture or not." Shizuka-sensei's grin took on a hint of what appeared to be pride, "First thing first, I should congratulate you for passing your final exams. Starting today, you are all real shinobi and with that title comes certain responsiblities"
Shizuka-sensei, then, began to talk. He talked about what it meant to be a shinobi, about obligations, about loyalty. The entire speech sounded awfully rehersed to Ren's ears, like Shizuka-sensei had given this very same talk a hundred times before, and he probably had. It reminded Ren of the lectures he got from the clan elders. Obligations this, loyalty that, all he needed to do was replace Konoha with the clan. It was for this reason Ren only half listened to their sensei's speech. He would likely get the very same one back home anyway, so he would listen to it in full then. Maybe.
When Ren tuned all the way back into the speech, after what seemed like too long, Shizuka-sensei was saying, "Though you may be shinobi now, you are only rookies compared to others. The hard part of your journey lies ahead. Soon you will be assigned duties by the village. In preparation for that, today we will be creating three-man teams."
Okay, I know its not alot. I was going to write more but ADD, medicine wearing o-oooooooooh shiny!! Er...I mean medicine wearing off. I'll try to post some more of the chapter later on today. Can't make any promises, it's hard concentrating on something for very long when my medicine starts wearing off.
shinithemegami.livejournal.com/5989.html#cutid1 (Link to the first part of chapter 1)
Akiyama-chan twisted in her seat to look at Ren, a big, cheerful smile plastered across her face and waved. Heat crept, once again, across Ren's cooling face and he reburied it in his folded arms. Inwardly, he berated himself, he could have at least waved back But he had not and, somehow, he just knew this was all Hiro-nii's fault too.
It was not long after that the bell signalling the start of class rang and in walked a man wearing the standard dark blue Konoha fatiques and green flak jacket, a single clipboard in hand.
"Alright," Ueda Shizuka-sensei called as he made his way to the front podium, "everyone in your seats and settle down!"
It took a minute, but the room eventually grew silent. Everyone was so excited today, Ren could practically feel the air hum with it. It made him feel slightly uncomfortable.
Shizuka-sensei's smiling hazel eyes swept over his students' faces. "Right then, how about we start things off with one last lecture," he began, a decidingly mischievous grin spreading across his face, "for old time's sake."
Shizuka-sensei's suggestion was met with the expected reply of hisses and boos from his students. Ren could not decide, when he finally looked up at their sensei from his arms, if the look on Shizuka-sensei's face meant he was joking or being serious. He got his answer soon enough.
"Actually, you are still my students until later this afternoon," said Shizuka-sense over his students' booing, tone taking on a note of seriousness, as he ran a hand through his close cut light brown hair, " so you don't really get a choice in whether you want a lecture or not." Shizuka-sensei's grin took on a hint of what appeared to be pride, "First thing first, I should congratulate you for passing your final exams. Starting today, you are all real shinobi and with that title comes certain responsiblities"
Shizuka-sensei, then, began to talk. He talked about what it meant to be a shinobi, about obligations, about loyalty. The entire speech sounded awfully rehersed to Ren's ears, like Shizuka-sensei had given this very same talk a hundred times before, and he probably had. It reminded Ren of the lectures he got from the clan elders. Obligations this, loyalty that, all he needed to do was replace Konoha with the clan. It was for this reason Ren only half listened to their sensei's speech. He would likely get the very same one back home anyway, so he would listen to it in full then. Maybe.
When Ren tuned all the way back into the speech, after what seemed like too long, Shizuka-sensei was saying, "Though you may be shinobi now, you are only rookies compared to others. The hard part of your journey lies ahead. Soon you will be assigned duties by the village. In preparation for that, today we will be creating three-man teams."
Okay, I know its not alot. I was going to write more but ADD, medicine wearing o-oooooooooh shiny!! Er...I mean medicine wearing off. I'll try to post some more of the chapter later on today. Can't make any promises, it's hard concentrating on something for very long when my medicine starts wearing off.