Four years? Really?
Been all melancholy the past week, and I didn't really understand why. Then I looked at some archived journal entries, and realized...oh yeah. It's that time of year. Has it been four years already?
Maybe I need to take a lesson from House, and realize that just because you made a mistake, doesn't mean you have to punish yourself for it. Although I believe in a fair and just universe, it doesn't mean that I have to be its instrument of karma on myself. There are plenty of people out there willing to wield the karma stick on me, right? hah.
Still, how much of a clue-bat does one man need applied to the side of his head before he gets the idea? I just...Maybe, maybe I'm just used to the pain. And letting my failure define me is the easiest thing I can do. I wish, I wish...if I had a fish for every wish, I'd be an aquarium owner. ah well.
Crawling around the attic with spiders and fun crawly things is not my idea of a good time, fyi. And raking leaves...it's another activity that just doesn't seem right anymore, even though it needs to get done. I just wonder, and it's a stupid kind of wondering, because it doesn't matter anyway. But, does she think of me at all?
Yeah. Like I said. We all have our kryptonite that turns us into idiots. I'm fairly sure you know mine.