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I have to write something. I have to be here, anchoring myself before my paranoia drives me to do something completely dumb. Nothing dangerous, I don't think. My self-preservation instincts have always been very powerful, so that's one thing to be grateful for
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I would have liked it if you were around even though you know me, I'm a miserable communicator all too easily fascinated by the mundane of the mundane. (latest topic: delivery van route optimization. Given that there have been papers on shinkansen timetabling optimization, you know where I'm going to turn to.)
I would also offer that Nocturne should be set aside because you have to work into your depression to deliver such a good chapter. Fuck, I'll sacrifice all gegenschein plot building for a more permanent change.
Something I learnt here and from some corporate high ups is that there's no wrong in asking for help from others. at the least, break up your anger and despair into smaller pieces and outsource them to a few people. I can't hold everything for you, just as you can't hold my fear of failures, but I can at least hold something. I hope.
kthanks and email me.
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