Heart Shaped Clock - Chapter 21

[shou_ni]

Title: Heart Shaped Clock.
Author: shou_ni
Pairing: ToraxShou, some NaoxHiroto
Rating: NC-17
Genre: Romance, Angst, Fluff, Smut-ish
Disclaimer: I dont own anyone, just the story.
Summary: When a beautiful guy enters Tora's life, he's smitten. Unfortunately Shou has a secret and he doesn't want to share it



Each day that passed left Shou feeling more and more lethargic and sluggish. His head ached for days upon end and his appetite was almost none existent.

It had taken him almost a week to send a text message to Hiroto, fingers shaking with each letter. Chewing on his lip as he anxiously waited for a reply. He couldn't understand why he was nervous, Hiroto had been his best friend since kindergarten for heavens sake.

It took another week build the courage to actually go to his apartment. A heavily awkward atmosphere loomed in the air, no real conversion was exchanged, simple sentences and that was it.

On the bright side Hiroto was looking heaps better that he did in the hospital. Mogu wasn't doing too badly either, although finding it difficult to walk or even move for a normal period of time he was still panting happily and wagging his little tail like a propeller.

Hiroto was still finding it difficult to move around, so Shou stayed until Nao returned home to help him out.

They weren't back to normal but it was enough to ease Shou's mind.

The mirror was slowly becoming something that Shou was beginning to hate. Every morning became more difficult than the last, dragging himself out of bed before Tora woke up was essential as he'd invested in a bottle of foundation and some concealer, after all he didn't want Tora to fuss over him. So each morning at seven he'd sneak into the bathroom and cover the dark circles beneath his eyes and the pale dull complexion he'd acquired.

Luckily Tora was so busy with work that he hadn't noticed, the last thing he wanted was for Tora to start questioning him. Shou had no idea why this was happening either.

Whatever it was, it was quickly taking hold of him.

Lack of appetite and lack of sleep were starting to take their toll. He found himself getting irritated at the smallest of things.

Regardless, he pushed everything to the back of his mind and carried on with daily life.

Tora grunted, fisting his fingers in the Brunette's silky hair. Those sinful lips working skillfully up and down his shaft setting off sparks in his stomach.

"Oh god... Shou"

The younger seemed to take the hint and began bobbing his head faster, sucking harder. Bringing the other closer to the edge.

Tora couldn't control himself anymore, bucking his hip forward harshly he hit the back of Shou's throat without warning. Shou pulled back with a cough just as Tora came hard, spilling his seed over Shou's face and hair, Dripping onto his shirt.

"Oh for fuck sake" He got off of his knees and made a beeline for the bathroom, slamming the door loudly behind him.

"Shou" Tora called through the wood "Baby what's wrong ?"

Shou looked at his reflection, splattered with his lover's essence. He dabbed at it with a tissue but annoyingly it didn't help, simply smudged his makeup.

"Did you have to spunk all over my fucking face?" He snapped, pulling the now soiled shirt over his head and throwing it into the laundry basket. "You're not a fucking porn star y'know"

"I didn't mean to, I'm sorry" The elder replied, amusement lacing his tone "They say it's good for the skin though"

"Not when you're going to a child's birthday party you prick, this isn't funny" He growled.

"Oh C'mon babe.."

"Look just go away. Better yet, make yourself useful and grab me a clean shirt"

He began washing his face with water, getting his bangs soaked in the process. Once his face was clean and dry he opened the cupboard under the sink and reached behind the pipes where he secretly stored his foundation and concealer.

His face soon became presentable again, he glared at his reflection, wishing that for once he could be somebody else, somebody healthy.

"I got your shirt, Shou"

Hiding behind the door he reached out and snatched the garment before slamming the door again.

With a roll of his eyes Tora was about to walk away, until he heard the door open again. Shou stepping out with a fresh face and his wet bangs clipped back.

"Well? Don't just stand there, we have somewhere to be"

Needless to say, they were late to the party. Nobuko was the first to greet them, running to the entrance in her four inch heels.

"Tora, Shou .. You made it" She beamed giving them both a tight hug "You look great"

Shou smiled warmly "Well so do you, If I wasn't gay and you weren't married. I'd be hitting on you right now" She was wearing a lovely white lace dress, simple but sparkly jewelry and with her hair elegantly pinned up to accent her slim neck and pretty jaw.

"Oh you" She laughed "Keep talking like that and You'll be fighting me off after a few drinks"

Tora snorted, mock frown. "You bitch" He joked.

"Oh Tora, you'll get over it" Nobuko pouted playfully "Anyway, come through. Tomoya has been asking about you both all morning, he's so excited to see you"

She lead them through to the garden where lots of small children ran around, playing happily with each other, eating sweets or dancing to the upbeat jpop song that was blasting through the stereo.

Upon seeing the new guests, Tomoya bounded over excitedly, throwing himself at the brunettes legs and squeezing tightly.

The party was more fun than they expected, plenty of adults to converse with, which made things more entertaining.

Tora observed his lover from across the garden, playing with Tomoya and a group of the other children.

"They look cute don't they?"

He jumped upon hearing a voice next to him. Nobuko leaned her head on his shoulder, pointing her camera in their direction. "Is it just me or does Shou look different? "

"What do you mean?"

"Well.. he looks thinner. Kinda unwell. Is he eating properly?"

Tora frowned. "He's fine, he's just been feeling a bit tired lately that's all" He looked back at Shou, maybe she was right. He did look a bit thinner, more tired. It was probably nothing but it didn't mean that he wasn't suddenly worried sick.

All of those thoughts however were suddenly forgotten as he walked through to the kitchen only to bump into his parents.

"Toraaaa, there you are" Mrs Amano cooed, pulling her eldest son into a vice grip of an embrace "So good to see you darling, how have you been? Where's Shou? You haven't broken up with him have you? Oh sweetheart it's okay mommy is here" She blabbed on. Clearly she'd had one glass of wine too many.

Tora couldn't help but laugh "No Mom, we haven't broken up, he's in the garden" It seemed to suffice as she smiled and patted him on the shoulder.

"That's good then. Now excuse me I need to find your brother" She said before making her exit, leaving only him and his father. It was awkward, anyone looking in would have been able to see that. They stood staring at each other, neither wanting to be the first to speak.

"You look well" Mr Amano was the first to cave in. "How've you been?"

"Fine" The raven haired spat "Not that it's any of your business"

"Tora please, I know I haven't exactly been pleasant but after all this time I would've hoped we could at least see eye to eye" He sighed softly "I want to apologize for everything. After all you are my son and I only ever want you to be happy"

As stubborn as he wanted to be, Tora felt an unwanted crack in his resistance. As horrid as the older man had been, he did seem genuinely remorseful.

"Then why don't you want me to be happy with Shou. You didn't even give him a chance, you judged him the second you laid eyes on him"

"I just want what's best for you.."

"He is best for me. He makes me so happy Dad"

Mr Amano sighed softly, giving him the smallest smile "I know. It's just taken a while for me to see that"

There was a small moment of silence, eyes averting to the floor. Both of them going over the conversation in their heads.

"I was once like you y'know?" Mr Amano spoke softly "I wan't gay but I'd had my fair share of shit relationships. I always found a way to mess them up, weather it was being a jack-ass, drink or drugs. I went through so much pain and heart break, it hurt so much. My life was really messed up and I once thought about ending it all. Then.." A sentimental smile appeared on his features "I met your mother, she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen, so sweet and kind with a heart of gold. But my parents didn't approve of her- They wanted me to marry a successful woman from a traditional family, not a humble girl with an interest in baking. I told them that I wanted to be with her whatever the cost, and I haven't seen them since. I don't want us to end up like that. The point is, I saw your life disintegrating because of your stupid decisions, the way you treated other people like dirt. The way your heart broke every single time and it killed me. I simply assumed that Shou was the same as Saga and the others. Turns out I was wrong."

Tora nodded, it was somewhat surprising really... He'd never heard this side of his fathers past, it made a lump for in his throat.

"I cannot apologize enough for my awful behavior, I just hope that you can one day forgive me"

Without warning, Tora's arms wrapped around his father, pulling him into a tight hug. Any anger seemed to have melted away. How could he stay mad at the old fool after that.

Having walked past the kitchen door, Mrs Amano smiled at the tender moment she was lucky enough to catch. It really had been years since her Husband and her Son had been close.

Shou was started to feel very tired. He'd spent the majority of the party playing games with the children, then Nobuko had dragged him over to introduce him to a group of her friends- who turned out to be almost as energetic as the kids.

He was quite ready to go home. A long soak in the bath to relieve his aching muscles, then crawl into bed for an early night.

He observed his lover from across the garden, talking to someone on his phone all smiles and politeness. Whatever it was about he seemed pleased enough. Shou didn't catch any of the conversation as he walked over, seeing Tora put his phone away.

"Hey sweetheart, you having a good time?" The raven haired asked, wrapping an arm around him.

"Yeah. It's been really fun but I think I'm gonna call a taxi and go home" He relied with a yawn.

"Why call a taxi? we have the car"

"Well I don't want to drag you away if you want to stay for the night time party"

"Nahhh, Don't worry about it babe. Let's just go home.. You look worn out" He said, gently running his fingers through Shou's soft hair.

Nobuko totted over in her heels, carrying a glass of wine in her well manicured fingers.

"You guys, come into the kitchen, all the kids have been taken upstairs to bed so we're going to do some shots" She beamed, grabbing Shou's hand to drag him along.

"Actually Nobuko. I think we're gonna head home now. My baby looks like he needs to put his feet up after playing with the kids all day" Tora interrupted cheerfully making the young lady pout.

"Really? That's such a shame, It would've been so fun to have you both stay the night and get as equally pissed as I plan on getting"

"It's your kids birthday party" The other laughed. "You can't get drunk"

"Look Tora, I'm a hot Mama, I think I deserve to get shit faced every now and again. Just because you wouldn't be able to keep up with my drinking you wimp" She teased.

Unfortunately for her neither of the men were rising to her taunts. bidding their goodbyes to everyone and heading home.

The hot water felt amazing on his fatigued body, making him groan low in his throat as he sank down further into the bath.

It was one of those rare moments where he could just relax without having to keep up appearances. Soaking hair and bare faced showing the dark circles under his dull eyes and the deathly pale complexion that adorned his skin.

He was just happy for a moment alone after such a hectic day.

The only problem was, he had forgotten to lock the door.

"I'm coming in Shou, need to brush my teeth" Tora announced as he opened the door and sauntered in. Shou was caught off guard, quickly hiding his face by turning away from him. The action didn't go unnoticed, Tora walked over, hand touching the younger's shoulder softly.

"Baby, is everything okay?" he asked "You don't look so good"

"I'm fine, You just surprised me is all" Shou cried. The elder wasn't buying it.

"You're lying. Look at me." He demanded "I said look at me"

The tone of his voice wasn't harsh, but it was firm enough to show that he meant business. Reluctantly Shou turned his head toward the other.

A breath caught in Tora's throat.

"What happened to you.."

"Nothing"

"This isn't nothing Shou. This is serious" He frowned "Please just talk to me"

"I don't want to" The brunette snapped, grabbing his towel, shakily getting to his feet and wrapping it around his waist. He attempted to step out of the tub but lost his footing, about to crash to the floor until Tora swooped in and caught him. He carefully placed him on the floor, kneeling down next to him.

"Get off of me, I don't need your help" He growled, pushing Tora away. But the elder was not giving up. Gently cupping his cheek to tilt his face towards him.

"Please Shou... I'm begging you, I'm so worried about you. so please talk to me"

"I... I can't"

That was it, Tora's resolve snapped. The hand that was cupping his cheek was now clenched into a tight ball, punching himself on the knee in frustration.

"Why do you do that?" He snapped, voice raising "You always lie to me about shit like this. Do you think I'm stupid, I know that you aren't okay. You promised that you would tell me if you were unwell and yet again I' having to force this shit out of you. Why can't you just be straight with me for once instead of lying to me again and again. Now please just tell me what's wrong"

"You're what's wrong" Shou yelled "You guilt tripping me into taking that fucking medication."

"What?" Tora was bewildered. Blinking in surprise at the other's outburst.

"The side effects are so strong on me. They have been making me so fucking sick but I kept taking them because it meant so much to you" Frustrated tears crept into his eyes as his hands fisted in his sodden hair "I've been hiding under layers of makeup so that you wouldn't get hurt. The last thing I wanted was for you to be upset"

The elder wrapped his arms around his lovers delicate frame, pulling him into a gentle embrace. The perfect slim figure that he had once known and enjoyed was now almost skeletal. His spine and hip bones protruding out from beneath dull looking skin, his ribs more prominent than ever. It explained why Shou kept making excuses not to have sex with him, why he only ever showered alone and why he got up at the crack of dawn. how could be be so blind?

He could feel the other shivering in his arms, cold air attacking his damp skin.

He got to his feet and stepped over to the medicine cabinet, taking out the bottle of tablets and then putting them in the bin.

"You don't need to take them anymore baby. I want you to be healthy and happy again. You need to start putting yourself first from now on"

The younger nodded, wiping his eyes with a limp hand.

"Will you come to bed with me?" He asked with such a small voice that it broke Tora's heart. He nodded with a warm smile and helped him through to the bedroom where they climbed into bed, bodies entangled and kisses showered over tired skin.

"I know this is not the best time to tell you " Tora hushed, stroking Shou's damp hair "My boss called today. We are trying to close a deal with a huge company in France, so he's flying a few of us out there to get them to sign the contract. I want you to come with me but it's strictly a business trip"

Shou hummed with a nod "So when are you going?"

"In five days"

"Well then you better get learning some French." He smiled, snuggling closer to him and closing his eyes "Faites de beaux reves mon cherie"

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Author's Notes- I manged to update quicker this time *yay*. Got the day off Uni today so I thought I'd get this up, then I have one more day of lessons before I can go home for Christmas, so with any luck I can update more. I know the first few scenes are quite choppy/changey but that's because I didn't want it all to flow together, if that makes sense. I also know that the ending is quite abrupt.. again that was done on purpose.
So yeah.. the medication didn't work so what will happen now?
Added a small bit of smut since everyone was so nice about it last time, less romantic here though lol.
Comments are fantastic and always welcome.
p.s thank you to everyone who read my new fic, it'll be updated soon.