I'm sitting in a room, made up of only big white walls and in the halls...
Silent Hill 4 Theme
== pulsating ambience ==
Name: Mouette
Age: 21
Gender: female
The links to three unstamped applications you have voted on:
http://community.livejournal.com/shrating/64057.html#cutid1
http://community.livejournal.com/shrating/64648.html#cutid1
http://community.livejournal.com/shrating/64797.html#cutid1
== into the depths of self discovery ==
As far as you know, describe what first impression people usually get from you.
Hm. From what I know I seem to be good at not giving off any kind of impression, so 'quiet and of no general interest' may be covering some occasions. Starting a conversation rarely happens, if it does, because somebody introduced me to somebody else, it's usually even more quietness, possibly even going to 'not a nice person' because the not talking can make me seem disinterested in or annoyed by any sort of company. And there are other things I've heard, but that probably covers the majority of it.
Sooo... what were you up to yesterday? Mh, nothing much. My schedule is a bit thin this semester, so I only had one lecture. Language Awareness something or other. So I went to university for that, then I got me some food and as far as I can remember spent the rest of the day playing Half-Life 2 and watching 24.
Is this one of your typical days or was there anything special about it? Eh, lectures and laziness pretty much seems to be the gist of it.
Do you consider yourself fearless? No, not at all. I think you'd need to have no emotions, no care or no clue of what's going on to experience a complete lack of fear. Sometimes that'd be great, sometimes probably not. Either way, I don't consider myself fearless but I do consider myself capable of facing (most of) the fears I have.
Do others do so too? Funnily enough fearless has been used to describe me a number of times. Maybe that was said by people who are just afraid of different things than I am or maybe I'm even better at hiding my panic than I thought I'd be. And yeah, I guess I do actually cover up the sheer panic nicely most of the time.
Would you describe yourself as macabre? Well, yes - happily so in fact. I've got a dictionary definition here and it says "weird, unearthly or horrible" and I'd love to go by that, and I'd also love to go by loving that sort of thing. As in, horror is just really really tasty and makes me very happy :D
Would other people agree? They very much do. They know that you can count me in as soon as you mention blood and gore, they know that my tastes along those lines can be slightly worrying and they'd probably also consider me on the morbid/melancholy side of the word from time to time, though I'm really very much YAY about it.
Are you outgoing? If I was any further from it I'd have to migrate to another planet to express it.
Do others see you like that as well? Surprisingly enough some people do actually say that I'm outgoing. I can't agree though, of course there's always the chance of misjudging myself, but here... no. They might think so because I'm outspoken, sometimes in a really 'HOLD IT! OBJECTION! CAPSLOCK!' sort of way, but that's a.) not the rule and b.) more along the lines of having to express an opinion that is important to me rather than any sort of feeling or emotion I may have. Also there are times when I walk up to people I've never seen before and give them stuff or compliment them on their hair, clothes or whatever. But that's more... weirdness I suppose or whatever you'd like to call it, I doubt that it has too much to do with being truly outgoing.
Social situations or homicidal ghosts - what's scarier? Lock me away in a closet with the most gruesome creature you've got, just keep me away from those damn social situations! For me social interaction is difficult at best and downright painful at worst. I'm sorry, I do try, I've gotten better at it too, but I really really don't engage in that sort of stuff unless truly necessary.
And which one did you say you'd rather take - physical or mental pain? Physical so much. With physical pain, on a good day, I can just go 'pain, you suck and I'm not talking to you' and that's that. And obviously that sort of retreating into your mind isn't all that possible if that's where the pain comes from.
== traversing the portals of reality ==
If I called you on a typical Saturday evening, where would you be? At... home? See, if other people were right I'd probably be out clubbing, but instead, most of the time, I'm just sitting here with a good book, a video game or some random university assignment.
And if I called you on a typical Sunday morning, oh say 5 am, how would you react? Overjoyed! Well, providing you're calling to tell me that I'm going to receive an atrociously large sum of money.... otherwise you're dead.
Hm. A young boy has apparently taken to standing outside your house / apartment building every day. Just what are you going to do about it?
I doubt that I'd even notice, let alone care. On a madly talkative day I might walk up to them and ask them what they're doing here, but other than that... whatever.
More hm. Looks like your phone, your TV and your computer don't work. You also can't seem to get anybody to hear you when you yell. Oh and did I mention that you can't actually leave your house/apartment? Now now, what's your reaction to that?
Hn. First I'll sit down and think about it. Then I'll check for any reasonable explanation there might be for this. If there is none I'll go to bed and hope that things will be back to normal when I wake up. If they aren't I'd kill myself, assuming that I'd either gone mad or was really trapped in my apartment which I honestly wouldn't care about if it wasn't for the lack of working appliances.
Oh hey, look! It's your six-year-old self! If we called them over to say hi, how would the meeting go?
I don't think there'd be much of a meeting since I can very well imagine my younger self being completely creeped out by my older self and just plain running away scared. Remember when I told you that I'm better with social situations now? Yeeeahwell, that'd still be a long way from back then.
Let's see... we still have some crazy religious issues here, but this time apparently mommy's part of the mix. And since we've covered God and all that jazz, how's the relationship with your dear mother going? If you don't feel like talking about it, your favourite flower is of course of equal interest to us.
Red orchids are nice. Moving on.
== resting comfortably ==
Oh noes! We're all out of guns! And uhm, the swords, knives and chainsaws are all dirty and unsanitary. So say, which item are you going to use to defend yourself instead?
I wield a mean letter opener.
Dammit! Looks like your item didn't do it. You have just been killed and they're playing your funeral theme song. Care to share the lyrics or a link to that song?
'Cause all of the stars,
Have faded away
Just try not to worry,
You'll see them someday,
Take what you need,
And be on your way and
Stop crying your heart out
Oasis - Stop crying your heart out
...and while the lyrics are all kinds of fancy drama I think I'd even settle for an instrumental version of it, because it's just a very pretty thing to accompany an about-to-rot corpse.
Now which Silent Hill 4 character do you consider yourself least like and why? Hm... probably Andrew. I'm not sure, but he seemed nervous, scared and even sort of indifferent in a way I'm not. Also I don't sing. Or feed people leeches. Poor leeches.
Anything else you would like to add? Nope.