Exploring The Infinity : A Yogi's Journal
On the bank of the holy river Narmada :
I must be around 18 years old at that time. Ever since my child hood days I had strong attraction for the holy river Narmada. After sixteen years of my age, spending time on the different secluded locations at the bank of Shri Narmadaji became my spiritual obsession. I used to spend two three days in some isolated place. I was always fascinated by the splendor of the holy river Narmada, whom I call with love and respect Shri Narmadaji.
Ever since my early childhood days I could never accede to the extensively emphasized “The Time Factor”. I could never agree up on the ascendancy of The Time over our lives. Time was nothing but a management factor to me. Even now I don’t comply with “The Time Factor” being the most important phenomena of our lives.
As per my routine trips, on that particular day also I went to a secluded location on the bank of Shri Narmadaji (holy river Narmada). I wanted to explore deeper and deeper into my perspective of “The Time Factor”. Every time I used to select some spot for my spiritual practice randomly. I used to go at some place near Narmada and walk, sometimes for a few minutes, sometimes for a few hours.
The cold breeze flowing from the surface of the holy river was quite soothing. After walking a while I decided to settle down at one place. There were many trees and the place was quite at a higher level than Shri Narmadaji’s eternally flowing water. I decided to sit there for meditation. It was so situated that I could see the holy river Narmada very easily. Before sitting for meditation I went to the holy water, as I always did, took bath nearby the bank. Water of Narmada is very deep and at some places generates whirl pool underneath. So it is always advisable to stay nearby the bank. As I entered the water I felt the embrace of my divine mother. I remembered all the great sages who had been blessed by Shri Narmadaji and who had created their aashram (hermitage) nearby. I was very much fascinated; I was in the river which had appeared from Bhagavan Shri Shivji.
I settled down under a Peepul tree. The atmosphere around was quite pleasant. Many different kinds of trees were there. The wind blowing through the branches of the trees was making a typical sound; it was like the sound of the silence, the sound of the seclusion, the sound of the unseen power. I was sitting wearing a dhoti only. My upper body was exposed to the nature. The pleasant breeze was embracing me. I looked at the holy water of Narmada. She was flowing calmly. Suddenly I realized what else can be a better symbol of “The Time Factor” than the holy river Narmada. Because it is said that she never dies. Even at the time of Pralaya (dissolution, some people consider it as destruction, but it is dissolution, not destruction) she remains in her own form. In reality she has out lived the ascendancy of “The Time Factor”. I looked at her steadily, spoke from the depth of my heart “Tvadiya Paada Pankaje, Namaami Devi Narmade” - I offer my obeisance unto your lotus feet O Goddess Narmada. I started to chant “Aum” loudly and my eyes started to close as I was slipping into a meditative state. Deep inside I wanted to break the barrier of the time. I wanted to know if there was someone who did not accept the binding of the time factor before me. I was born of the land of great yogis. There must be many. I had no doubt about it. Gradually I was completely in meditative state. Nothing mattered, nothing disturbed. Sometimes I used to pass three days like this. This was the time when I was with myself completely. I had no boundaries. I was absorbed into perpetual realm, one with the absolute.
I started to return to my material consciousness by the faintly heard female sound, “Beta” (son). It was sound like mother waking up her child. Gradually I could hear the sound louder as I reconnected with my physical self, with my senses. Before I can open my eyes completely I felt a strong flash of light on my closed eyes. I opened my eyes gradually. The call of mother which was heard very loud and strong started to fade out. I realized that the sound was coming from the direction of Shri Narmadaji, the holy river. My eyes were completely open now and I was connected with the surrounding. I realized that it was morning time. I was in meditative condition for about eighteen hours. The soft golden light was playing on the glittering surface of the river Narmada. It looked as if she was ornamented with the juice of the gold. Before I could understand who was calling me, my attention was captured by a very stupendous human persona who was appearing as if from the golden water of Shri Narmadaji. Even though I could see his silhouette only as there was bright golden light dancing on the river surface in the background, the grandeur of the person was striking. I could see that he was coming towards me. From where did he come? I did not see any boat around. When I saw him, he was in water up to his knees. He was already out of water and was taking long steps. He was tall, must be at least 7 feet or more. There was a big jata (braid of long hair rising high at the top of the head), long beard and in one hand was a big bow, on the back was hanging a quiver. He had a roll of some leather under his one arm pit. He disappeared for a while as he had to climb upwards. The Sun was rising. I saw him again as he climbed the slope taking up towards the place where I was sitting. He was tall… very tall as I told before. Now I could see him clearly. He had very fair complexion. Very fair, you can say ‘white’. His hair was black and braided over his head tied with rudraksh mala and a smartly cut strip of tiger skin. Hair braided in such manner is called Jataa, like on the head of Bhagavan Shri Shivji (Lord Shiva). He had Tripundra (three horizontal lines with bhasma - ash) on his forehead. He was wearing a tiger skin around his vest which was reaching his knees. His free hand was reaching up to his knee. In Sanskrut such persons are called Aajaanu Baahu or Aajaanu Bhuj, which means “a person with hands reaching up to his knees when he is in a straight standing position”. It indicated that he was a divine person with great skills in archery. His eyes were very prominent and powerful. His long beard was waving in the wind. He was wearing wooden paduka (traditional sandal even now worn by Hindu saints) in his feet. I stood up hurriedly. He was coming towards me with a calm and firm walk. His muscular body was a symbol of everlasting youth. He seemed like some sage of Vedic era.
I ran towards him and fall unto his feet. He held my shoulders and lifted me into a warm embrace. I felt the warmth of father in it. The vibration from his body made me realize that he had came to me to confirm that ascendancy of “The Time Factor” can be defeated. He did not belong to the present period of time. Perhaps he was sent to me by the divine mother Narmada, who had blessed billions for millenniums by her manifestation as the holy river.
My head was touching the chest of the towering personality. Today after almost thirty five years of that moment, the feelings are as fresh and live as then. I felt the warmth of the wide muscular chest and the touch of big beads of his rudraksh mala. His strong arms were holding me like a child. I suddenly felt that we were strongly connected. I also could feel who he can be, but was not prepared for such an unexpected encounter. I understood that I was held by the person who has conquered the kaala, The Time Factor. Bhagavati Shri Narmada Mata had blessed me with a living proof to justify my line of thinking. I did not want to separate from him. My eyes were already flowing. His right hand was softly caressing my head. His body had an odor of sandal blended with musk. Strong divine energies were covering me. I felt that I was filled with his energy… after sometimes I felt that we shared the same energy.
Then softly he separated me and looked into my eyes as I looked up at his face, a handsome face covered with thick black beard. Powerful dark eyes under thick black eye brows showed firmness and mercy. Glowing white complexion was radiating a divinity which cannot be described. His eyes were penetrating. I had never felt such power in anyone’s eyes before. But his look towards me was soothing. His lips smiled in accordance with the comforting look in his eyes. He spoke in a very soft but strong manly voice,
“Shyam!”
“Bhagavaan!” I responded with surprise, “Do you know me?!”
“Why? We both know each other, don’t we?” His face brightened up with a light laughter.
I nodded in affirmation. I was still in a state of sheer astonishment.
Then he led me towards the peepul tree where I was sitting in meditation. I still could not believe what was happening. He started to take down his bow from his shoulder and I understood that he wanted to rest it against the tree. I spontaneously extended my hand to take the bow from him and put it against the tree. He looked at me with a smile on his face. Suddenly I realized that no traditional archer of ancient time will give his bow in the hands of an unknown person. I looked at him startled and embarrassed. His smile widened and he extended his hand with the bow towards me. The bow was almost as tall as he himself was. I held it with my both hands and suddenly realized that I had never tried to lift such a heavy object ever before in my life. I could understand his strength by the fact that all this time he was carrying this bow as effortlessly as carrying a feather. I felt for a second that the bow can slip from my hand but then I contemplated on Bhagavan Shri Shivji and took completely from his hand. I could lift it even though it was too much heavy. I rested it with the support of the tree. Shri Bhagavan, as I addressed him, was smiling at me. I was all in sweat.
“I could have dropped your divine bow.” I said apologetically.
“How could you have dropped it?” His smile widened and he continued, “I let you do it because I knew that you won’t drop it.” He put his hand on my head with love.
He told me, “Once again we meet.” I realized that he was right. We had met before. More than one time perhaps, but when? I was sure that it was happening for the first time in this birth. It had to be in my past life. I immediately felt that he was right, we had met before many times, in my past life.
We sat under the Peepul tree. I did not know what to talk about. Before his arrival I had a lot of questions but now there were none. I very much wanted to meditate in his presence. He nodded as if he was reading my mind. I wanted to close my eyes in order to meditate. But I could not stop myself from gazing at him. My vision started to blur, gradually I was slipping in to a different world with my eyes open. I saw a big cave in which several rishis (Sages) were sitting in Padmaasana (The Lotus Posture). First I felt like I had reached there as a guest but then I realized that I was also sitting with them in Padmaasana. Who were they? What place it was? What were they doing? Nothing mattered much to me. I felt like being a part of the group. Suddenly I heard their sound together,
“We are searching for you.” They said.
“I am here, right in front of you.” I replied.
“Yes, we see you as you are.” They said.
“They are sitting there since ages.” I heard the heavy but soothing voice, and I opened my eyes.
My Shri Bhagavan was looking at me with a smile on his face.
“They are sitting there since ages.” He repeated his words and added, “You should not be surprised by this.”
I looked at him, I understood him, but I could not respond.
He spent with me three days. He was an ocean of knowledge. Perhaps there was not anything that he did not know. He was unfolding the secrets of the unseen, showing the imperishable realm of spiritualism.
Before we parted he blessed me with a divine asana (mat for spiritual practice) and three beads of rudraksh, which I still have as my prize possession.
-Shriyogeshvara Chaitnya
I must be around 18 years old at that time. Ever since my child hood days I had strong attraction for the holy river Narmada. After sixteen years of my age, spending time on the different secluded locations at the bank of Shri Narmadaji became my spiritual obsession. I used to spend two three days in some isolated place. I was always fascinated by the splendor of the holy river Narmada, whom I call with love and respect Shri Narmadaji.
Ever since my early childhood days I could never accede to the extensively emphasized “The Time Factor”. I could never agree up on the ascendancy of The Time over our lives. Time was nothing but a management factor to me. Even now I don’t comply with “The Time Factor” being the most important phenomena of our lives.
As per my routine trips, on that particular day also I went to a secluded location on the bank of Shri Narmadaji (holy river Narmada). I wanted to explore deeper and deeper into my perspective of “The Time Factor”. Every time I used to select some spot for my spiritual practice randomly. I used to go at some place near Narmada and walk, sometimes for a few minutes, sometimes for a few hours.
The cold breeze flowing from the surface of the holy river was quite soothing. After walking a while I decided to settle down at one place. There were many trees and the place was quite at a higher level than Shri Narmadaji’s eternally flowing water. I decided to sit there for meditation. It was so situated that I could see the holy river Narmada very easily. Before sitting for meditation I went to the holy water, as I always did, took bath nearby the bank. Water of Narmada is very deep and at some places generates whirl pool underneath. So it is always advisable to stay nearby the bank. As I entered the water I felt the embrace of my divine mother. I remembered all the great sages who had been blessed by Shri Narmadaji and who had created their aashram (hermitage) nearby. I was very much fascinated; I was in the river which had appeared from Bhagavan Shri Shivji.
I settled down under a Peepul tree. The atmosphere around was quite pleasant. Many different kinds of trees were there. The wind blowing through the branches of the trees was making a typical sound; it was like the sound of the silence, the sound of the seclusion, the sound of the unseen power. I was sitting wearing a dhoti only. My upper body was exposed to the nature. The pleasant breeze was embracing me. I looked at the holy water of Narmada. She was flowing calmly. Suddenly I realized what else can be a better symbol of “The Time Factor” than the holy river Narmada. Because it is said that she never dies. Even at the time of Pralaya (dissolution, some people consider it as destruction, but it is dissolution, not destruction) she remains in her own form. In reality she has out lived the ascendancy of “The Time Factor”. I looked at her steadily, spoke from the depth of my heart “Tvadiya Paada Pankaje, Namaami Devi Narmade” - I offer my obeisance unto your lotus feet O Goddess Narmada. I started to chant “Aum” loudly and my eyes started to close as I was slipping into a meditative state. Deep inside I wanted to break the barrier of the time. I wanted to know if there was someone who did not accept the binding of the time factor before me. I was born of the land of great yogis. There must be many. I had no doubt about it. Gradually I was completely in meditative state. Nothing mattered, nothing disturbed. Sometimes I used to pass three days like this. This was the time when I was with myself completely. I had no boundaries. I was absorbed into perpetual realm, one with the absolute.
I started to return to my material consciousness by the faintly heard female sound, “Beta” (son). It was sound like mother waking up her child. Gradually I could hear the sound louder as I reconnected with my physical self, with my senses. Before I can open my eyes completely I felt a strong flash of light on my closed eyes. I opened my eyes gradually. The call of mother which was heard very loud and strong started to fade out. I realized that the sound was coming from the direction of Shri Narmadaji, the holy river. My eyes were completely open now and I was connected with the surrounding. I realized that it was morning time. I was in meditative condition for about eighteen hours. The soft golden light was playing on the glittering surface of the river Narmada. It looked as if she was ornamented with the juice of the gold. Before I could understand who was calling me, my attention was captured by a very stupendous human persona who was appearing as if from the golden water of Shri Narmadaji. Even though I could see his silhouette only as there was bright golden light dancing on the river surface in the background, the grandeur of the person was striking. I could see that he was coming towards me. From where did he come? I did not see any boat around. When I saw him, he was in water up to his knees. He was already out of water and was taking long steps. He was tall, must be at least 7 feet or more. There was a big jata (braid of long hair rising high at the top of the head), long beard and in one hand was a big bow, on the back was hanging a quiver. He had a roll of some leather under his one arm pit. He disappeared for a while as he had to climb upwards. The Sun was rising. I saw him again as he climbed the slope taking up towards the place where I was sitting. He was tall… very tall as I told before. Now I could see him clearly. He had very fair complexion. Very fair, you can say ‘white’. His hair was black and braided over his head tied with rudraksh mala and a smartly cut strip of tiger skin. Hair braided in such manner is called Jataa, like on the head of Bhagavan Shri Shivji (Lord Shiva). He had Tripundra (three horizontal lines with bhasma - ash) on his forehead. He was wearing a tiger skin around his vest which was reaching his knees. His free hand was reaching up to his knee. In Sanskrut such persons are called Aajaanu Baahu or Aajaanu Bhuj, which means “a person with hands reaching up to his knees when he is in a straight standing position”. It indicated that he was a divine person with great skills in archery. His eyes were very prominent and powerful. His long beard was waving in the wind. He was wearing wooden paduka (traditional sandal even now worn by Hindu saints) in his feet. I stood up hurriedly. He was coming towards me with a calm and firm walk. His muscular body was a symbol of everlasting youth. He seemed like some sage of Vedic era.
I ran towards him and fall unto his feet. He held my shoulders and lifted me into a warm embrace. I felt the warmth of father in it. The vibration from his body made me realize that he had came to me to confirm that ascendancy of “The Time Factor” can be defeated. He did not belong to the present period of time. Perhaps he was sent to me by the divine mother Narmada, who had blessed billions for millenniums by her manifestation as the holy river.
My head was touching the chest of the towering personality. Today after almost thirty five years of that moment, the feelings are as fresh and live as then. I felt the warmth of the wide muscular chest and the touch of big beads of his rudraksh mala. His strong arms were holding me like a child. I suddenly felt that we were strongly connected. I also could feel who he can be, but was not prepared for such an unexpected encounter. I understood that I was held by the person who has conquered the kaala, The Time Factor. Bhagavati Shri Narmada Mata had blessed me with a living proof to justify my line of thinking. I did not want to separate from him. My eyes were already flowing. His right hand was softly caressing my head. His body had an odor of sandal blended with musk. Strong divine energies were covering me. I felt that I was filled with his energy… after sometimes I felt that we shared the same energy.
Then softly he separated me and looked into my eyes as I looked up at his face, a handsome face covered with thick black beard. Powerful dark eyes under thick black eye brows showed firmness and mercy. Glowing white complexion was radiating a divinity which cannot be described. His eyes were penetrating. I had never felt such power in anyone’s eyes before. But his look towards me was soothing. His lips smiled in accordance with the comforting look in his eyes. He spoke in a very soft but strong manly voice,
“Shyam!”
“Bhagavaan!” I responded with surprise, “Do you know me?!”
“Why? We both know each other, don’t we?” His face brightened up with a light laughter.
I nodded in affirmation. I was still in a state of sheer astonishment.
Then he led me towards the peepul tree where I was sitting in meditation. I still could not believe what was happening. He started to take down his bow from his shoulder and I understood that he wanted to rest it against the tree. I spontaneously extended my hand to take the bow from him and put it against the tree. He looked at me with a smile on his face. Suddenly I realized that no traditional archer of ancient time will give his bow in the hands of an unknown person. I looked at him startled and embarrassed. His smile widened and he extended his hand with the bow towards me. The bow was almost as tall as he himself was. I held it with my both hands and suddenly realized that I had never tried to lift such a heavy object ever before in my life. I could understand his strength by the fact that all this time he was carrying this bow as effortlessly as carrying a feather. I felt for a second that the bow can slip from my hand but then I contemplated on Bhagavan Shri Shivji and took completely from his hand. I could lift it even though it was too much heavy. I rested it with the support of the tree. Shri Bhagavan, as I addressed him, was smiling at me. I was all in sweat.
“I could have dropped your divine bow.” I said apologetically.
“How could you have dropped it?” His smile widened and he continued, “I let you do it because I knew that you won’t drop it.” He put his hand on my head with love.
He told me, “Once again we meet.” I realized that he was right. We had met before. More than one time perhaps, but when? I was sure that it was happening for the first time in this birth. It had to be in my past life. I immediately felt that he was right, we had met before many times, in my past life.
We sat under the Peepul tree. I did not know what to talk about. Before his arrival I had a lot of questions but now there were none. I very much wanted to meditate in his presence. He nodded as if he was reading my mind. I wanted to close my eyes in order to meditate. But I could not stop myself from gazing at him. My vision started to blur, gradually I was slipping in to a different world with my eyes open. I saw a big cave in which several rishis (Sages) were sitting in Padmaasana (The Lotus Posture). First I felt like I had reached there as a guest but then I realized that I was also sitting with them in Padmaasana. Who were they? What place it was? What were they doing? Nothing mattered much to me. I felt like being a part of the group. Suddenly I heard their sound together,
“We are searching for you.” They said.
“I am here, right in front of you.” I replied.
“Yes, we see you as you are.” They said.
“They are sitting there since ages.” I heard the heavy but soothing voice, and I opened my eyes.
My Shri Bhagavan was looking at me with a smile on his face.
“They are sitting there since ages.” He repeated his words and added, “You should not be surprised by this.”
I looked at him, I understood him, but I could not respond.
He spent with me three days. He was an ocean of knowledge. Perhaps there was not anything that he did not know. He was unfolding the secrets of the unseen, showing the imperishable realm of spiritualism.
Before we parted he blessed me with a divine asana (mat for spiritual practice) and three beads of rudraksh, which I still have as my prize possession.
-Shriyogeshvara Chaitnya