ohhhhhhhh gawwwwd i sound soooooooooooo disgustingggggggggggggggggggg.

I like to think I'm a pretty easy-going individual. It doesn't take a lot to impress me. All you really need to do is come pick me up late at night after work, and say something sweet like "Lady, step inside my Hyundai ( Read more... )

O say, can you see, by the florescent light
What so bitterly we cleaned at Megan O'Neil's last screaming?
Whose metal blades and splash guard, thro' the earlier shift,
O'er the malts and shakes made, were probably just as goddamn irratating
And the fact that Husker Blitzes were the Special, even though they are really gross
Gave proof thro' the night ( Read more... )

When I was little I used to get strep throat ALL THE TIME. Then I got my tonsils out in the...um....6th grade?....I can't remember, but it certainly helped because since then I haven't really had a throat problem. So over time I've sort of forgotten what it feels like to have a sore throat. Guess what? It feels fucking bad.

This thing has been floating around, I found it at the journal of
( Read more... )

JOB! JOB! JOB! JOB!

I MIGHT GET AN AWESOME JOB!

JOB! JOB! JOB! JOB!

IF THEY WILL HIRE THIS TOTAL SLOB!

JOB! JOB! JOB! JOB!

I SWEAR THAT TO THIS JOB I WILL COMMIT!

JOB! JOB! JOB! JOB!

AND ALL OF MY SKILLS ARE LEGIT!

JOB! JOB! JOB! JOB!

IF YOU DON'T HIRE I'LL FUCK UP SHIT!

4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
4,000 IM!
2.485 miles of FUUUUCCCCKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks, Dr. Weixelman, that book was the best.

Some wisdom:

When juice is contained in an uncovered pitcher, it absorbs the flavors of everything else in your refridgerator.
Did you ever drink six different types of cheese? I am crossing it off of my list right now.

Let me give a little update about home life.

It is July 13th, over a month into the summer. Yet still, every corner I turn I find APUSH notecards stashed around, hiding out like cockroaches. They're everywhere. It's not safe here.