(no subject)
I should really be getting this up like... now or within the next five or six days at least.
Chapter 6
Dear Santa,
All I want for Christmas is my sanity back. Please?
And cut Kaiba-kun some slack with the party, I’m sure it’s a nightmare for him.
Arigatou,
Ryo Bakura
“Kaiba-kun!” Ryo called running to catch the brunette before he disappeared into the crowd. The hikari was mildly surprised to find that the CEO had paused to allow him to catch up, but Ryo was not about to question the small blessing. “Christmas shopping?” he asked breathlessly, once he’d reached the other.
“No, I came here for the social interaction,” came the sarcastic retort.
Ryo rolled his eyes, when he’d first arrived in Domino such a frosty reception would have sent him scurrying back in the direction he’d come from, but by dint of being Bakura’s hikari-slash-roommate-slash-boyfriend-slash-maid Kaiba simply wasn’t frightening anymore.
“Well, I thought I’d tell you now since I saw you, Otousan invited Bakura and I to Egypt for Christmas; we leave on Christmas Eve. So I’m sorry we won’t be there, I’m sure it would be wonderful, Jou-kun says that the servants are fantastic decorators.”
“Don’t worry too much about it. Without you two there’s less chance of my things going missing.”
Ryo frowned mentally, only Kaiba-kun could be reassuring and insulting in the same breath. “Well, Merry Christmas, Kaiba-kun,” Ryo left, not even waiting for a response as he doubted he’d get one.
“You too.”
Ryo smiled to himself, Jou-kun you are a miracle worker.
Chapter 7
Dear Santa,
I can explain.
All of those things that Marik, Bakura, and I do?
I’m only there to try and stop them! But they don’t listen to me! Instead they drag me along!
I tried to talk Marik out of drying that gerbil off in the microwave. But would he listen?
No.
All I could do was distract him long enough for the gerbil to get away. So instead Marik started drying the silverware in it when Ishizu asked us to do the dishes.
Needless to say, we need a new microwave. But that’s not what I’m asking for!
I also tried to tell Bakura that Pegasus would be mad enough that he and Marik ripped his plush apart (and then had the nerve to blame me when Ishizu asked about that pink ear Marik kept as a souvenir) and that taking the silver wasn’t a good idea but he wouldn’t listen to me either!
And if someone tries to tell you that the robbery at Firework Emporium and those stuffed toys at Toys R Us that were blown up by some of the missing fireworks was my fault, they’re lying.
I told Rishid that I had no idea where all those bottle rockets came from, or why they were in my sock drawer…
But I’ve been good Santa, and for Christmas I want fireworks (especially the ones that explode), fake vomit, stink bombs, smoke bombs, some of those sugar cubes with fake bugs in them, some of those ice cubes with fake bugs in them, exploding golf balls (the fact that my science professor plays golf is a total coincidence), exploding chewing gum, those cap things that make the gum explode, laxatives that dissolve in liquids, one of those packs of gum with a mousetrap in it, shit in a can, a remote control fart machine, sneezing powder, itching powder, fake car scratches (that has nothing to do with Kaiba’s new Ferrari), various fake bugs, and a rubber chicken.
Actually, forget the car scratches.
Remember I’m the innocent one.
Malik
Marik was reading over his hikari’s shoulder. “Do you really think he’s going to buy all of that bull, Hikari-pretty?”
“I doubt it,” Malik admitted, “but I’m not so bad that I’ll get nothing, he might get me some of the more harmless stuff. After all, I did save the gerbil.”
Marik pouted, “But you still lied, Malik, you didn’t distract me, you bribed me with sex to return that little fur ball to the neighbor kid after I decided to see if they could swim.”
Malik scowled, “Well, that did distract you. And the gerbil was saved so I get points for that. And if you’re so honest, let’s see your letter.”
Marik shrugged and handed over the paper.
Old man,
I want my own microwave, various small, furry animals, various small, metal objects, and various flammable chemicals.
Oh and for the priest to get his head out of his ass.
Marik
Malik stared, and blinked. “Well,” he said at length, “at least you’re blunt and to the point.”