Slumber Party - Part 3
Title: Slumber Party - Part 3
Written very collaboratively by peasant007, docnerd and leilia
Title: Slumber Party - Part 1
Rating: PG-13
Stories Involved: Currently Vetinari Dualegacy, Devereaux Legacy, Yakko's World OWBC
***
Zane was fairly sure that the tree outside Eden's window had not been intended for three teenage boys to climb and peek inside the house. He, Yakko, and Spider were perched on the sturdiest branch, shivering from the cold, glumly staring in at the giggling group of girls.
"So when do the nurses pillow fight?" Yakko asked. "I was promised pillow fights and nighties and boobs. Do we have to wait for after the movie?"
Spider's wings had become sodden, and he was as cold as the others, with the added weight of wet feathers pulling at him.
"There's not a single kiss! None of them have made out yet." Yakko glanced over at Spider. "But after the movie, right? Maybe it's porn?"
Zane slapped a hand over his eyes. He certainly hoped it wasn't. That would certainly be inappropriate for a bunch of teenage girls. "Can we go home now? It's cold, and I'm not sitting out here through a whole movie. If they were going to do any of the stuff you said, wouldn't they have done it already?"
"There were almost boobs," Spider pointed out. "Those two green chicks started to change right in front of the window."
Yakko wrung water out of his dreadlocks. "And then they moved. Almost boobs is the same thing as no boobs."
Zane was all right with almost boobs. Almost boobs had caused a situation that he'd thought he had already gotten a handle on. He blushed in the darkness, happy that no one else had seen it happen.
"Girls like to talk, right? Maybe they have to get it out of their system first," Spider suggested.
"You know, if I wanted to see boobies, I could just go back to my wife," Yakko said philosophically.
"Me too," Zane said.
Spider crossed his arms. "Yeah, well, that's not an option for me. I am boob-free at the moment." He muttered, "Except maybe for you two."
"This was your idea," Zane pointed out. "I am cold. Nothing is happening. Can we just go?"
"Good bachelor parties always have boobs. Or so I am told," Spider said.
Yakko felt the tips of his pointy ears. "Is it cold enough for frostbite?"
"You're dead. You don't get frostbite," Spider shot back.
"Doesn't make it any less uncomfortable," Zane said.
"I'm bored," Yakko said. He stepped out further onto the branch and started bouncing up and down, shouting, "Hello nurse!"
"Shut up!" Spider hissed, grabbing onto other branches for support.
"Hi, nurse! Please to be dancing! And taking off your clothes!"
Inside, two black-haired girls shrieked and snatched blankets up to their chins. One of the green-skinned girls and a dark-skinned girl with a cascade of brown hair walked close to the window and started dancing, swiveling their hips and tugging the hems of their tops slowly upwards.
"Hello nurse!" Yakko crowed with an approving nod.
"Boobs!" Spider cheered.
Zane hid his face behind his hands. "Are you happy now? Can we please go?"
"Boobs are merely imminent, not yet actual," Spider informed him, leaning out to get a better look. The two girls near the window were giving what he judged were come-hither looks. "We don't want to leave before the show's over. It'd be rude."
"I don't want to be polite. I just don't want to go to jail," Zane said.
"Aren't you the Grim Reaper? Even if you don't have a Swedish accent? Who'd put you in jail?" Yakko asked, momentarily turning his attention from the window.
"Then Tina! Tina Tina Tina! Can we go now?"
Spider sighed. "Zane, this is why we can't have nice things. I can't take you anywhere."
The shirts in the window were slowly raising higher and higher.
"Underboob!" Yakko crowed. "Just a little farther..."
"Just a little farther..." Spider agreed, fingers twitching.
The outdoor lights flicked on.
"Oh, no!" Zane said. "It's the fuzz! We're busted! We are so busted!"
"What do we do?" Spider asked.
"Run around the house and act like crazy people!" Yakko suggested. "Drop an anvil on their heads! Sing the Anvilania national anthem until they all fall asleep!"
Shooting Yakko a confused look, Zane suggested, "We could run away. Running away is good."
"But we're so close to boobs!" Spider protested.
The girls in the window had retreated, and all hope of boobs was gone, but the fear of discovery remained.
Down below, a door opened and a thin rectangle of light shone from inside. Mary Devereaux stepped out and saw three pale faces and a pale torso. "You come down from there!"
Spider reared away from the light, and the added weight of his wet wings overbalanced him and sent him tumbling from the bay tree, biting back curses until he hit the ground and the breath was knocked out of him.
"Are you okay?" Zane called down.
"Do I look okay?" Spider snapped.
"You look like roadkill," Yakko pointed out helpfully.
Mary started across the lawn towards Spider. Zane and Yakko climbed out of the tree far more carefully, and Zane was equally careful to hide his face from Mary. While down below, Spider clambered to his feet.
When they reached the bottom of the trunk, Yakko looked over at Zane. "Can't you get us out of here? Don't you have a horse?"
Zane glanced towards the edge of the lot and saw Binky waiting patiently, with a look of decided amusement on his equine face. The three boys scrambled onto the horse, Yakko planting his hand firmly on Spider's ass and giving him a boost.
"I'm calling the police!" Mary called. "You perverts, spying on teenage girls! What would your mothers say?"
"Well, I think we're off the hook there," Spider said.
"Zane! Zane, is that you?" Mary shouted, peering at the three boys.
"Go, Binky! Go!" Zane yelled. The horse bolted off into the darkness. "Fly like the wind!"
***
"This is a really good bachelor party," Zane said, toasting a marshmallow. "This is the sort of thing I could really get behind. We should keep this in mind for the future, not that I plan to ever need another bachelor party." He prodded his nose gratefully now that it was back to normal.
"I live to please," Spider said sarcastically. "Except for the living part."
"If we were going to do this the whole time, we should have just done this and saved ourselves the cold and the falling out of trees part," Yakko said. "Although the nurses were hot."
"If Tina should ask, all we did was just make s'mores," stated Zane.
Yakko blew out the flame on his marshmallow. "So, Spider, if you can do the funky eye thing and make us teenagers and age us up again, why couldn't you zap us out of the tree? Or zap the shirts off the nurses?"
Spider groaned and facepalmed. "That would have been the smart thing, right? But apparently stupid teenage boy hormones don't allow for that sort of higher reasoning."
"Mmmm, s'mores," said Yakko.
***
That is it from Doc, Ang and Lark. I hope you all enjoyed our alcoholic collaboration. ^_^
Written very collaboratively by peasant007, docnerd and leilia
Title: Slumber Party - Part 1
Rating: PG-13
Stories Involved: Currently Vetinari Dualegacy, Devereaux Legacy, Yakko's World OWBC
***
Zane was fairly sure that the tree outside Eden's window had not been intended for three teenage boys to climb and peek inside the house. He, Yakko, and Spider were perched on the sturdiest branch, shivering from the cold, glumly staring in at the giggling group of girls.
"So when do the nurses pillow fight?" Yakko asked. "I was promised pillow fights and nighties and boobs. Do we have to wait for after the movie?"
Spider's wings had become sodden, and he was as cold as the others, with the added weight of wet feathers pulling at him.
"There's not a single kiss! None of them have made out yet." Yakko glanced over at Spider. "But after the movie, right? Maybe it's porn?"
Zane slapped a hand over his eyes. He certainly hoped it wasn't. That would certainly be inappropriate for a bunch of teenage girls. "Can we go home now? It's cold, and I'm not sitting out here through a whole movie. If they were going to do any of the stuff you said, wouldn't they have done it already?"
"There were almost boobs," Spider pointed out. "Those two green chicks started to change right in front of the window."
Yakko wrung water out of his dreadlocks. "And then they moved. Almost boobs is the same thing as no boobs."
Zane was all right with almost boobs. Almost boobs had caused a situation that he'd thought he had already gotten a handle on. He blushed in the darkness, happy that no one else had seen it happen.
"Girls like to talk, right? Maybe they have to get it out of their system first," Spider suggested.
"You know, if I wanted to see boobies, I could just go back to my wife," Yakko said philosophically.
"Me too," Zane said.
Spider crossed his arms. "Yeah, well, that's not an option for me. I am boob-free at the moment." He muttered, "Except maybe for you two."
"This was your idea," Zane pointed out. "I am cold. Nothing is happening. Can we just go?"
"Good bachelor parties always have boobs. Or so I am told," Spider said.
Yakko felt the tips of his pointy ears. "Is it cold enough for frostbite?"
"You're dead. You don't get frostbite," Spider shot back.
"Doesn't make it any less uncomfortable," Zane said.
"I'm bored," Yakko said. He stepped out further onto the branch and started bouncing up and down, shouting, "Hello nurse!"
"Shut up!" Spider hissed, grabbing onto other branches for support.
"Hi, nurse! Please to be dancing! And taking off your clothes!"
Inside, two black-haired girls shrieked and snatched blankets up to their chins. One of the green-skinned girls and a dark-skinned girl with a cascade of brown hair walked close to the window and started dancing, swiveling their hips and tugging the hems of their tops slowly upwards.
"Hello nurse!" Yakko crowed with an approving nod.
"Boobs!" Spider cheered.
Zane hid his face behind his hands. "Are you happy now? Can we please go?"
"Boobs are merely imminent, not yet actual," Spider informed him, leaning out to get a better look. The two girls near the window were giving what he judged were come-hither looks. "We don't want to leave before the show's over. It'd be rude."
"I don't want to be polite. I just don't want to go to jail," Zane said.
"Aren't you the Grim Reaper? Even if you don't have a Swedish accent? Who'd put you in jail?" Yakko asked, momentarily turning his attention from the window.
"Then Tina! Tina Tina Tina! Can we go now?"
Spider sighed. "Zane, this is why we can't have nice things. I can't take you anywhere."
The shirts in the window were slowly raising higher and higher.
"Underboob!" Yakko crowed. "Just a little farther..."
"Just a little farther..." Spider agreed, fingers twitching.
The outdoor lights flicked on.
"Oh, no!" Zane said. "It's the fuzz! We're busted! We are so busted!"
"What do we do?" Spider asked.
"Run around the house and act like crazy people!" Yakko suggested. "Drop an anvil on their heads! Sing the Anvilania national anthem until they all fall asleep!"
Shooting Yakko a confused look, Zane suggested, "We could run away. Running away is good."
"But we're so close to boobs!" Spider protested.
The girls in the window had retreated, and all hope of boobs was gone, but the fear of discovery remained.
Down below, a door opened and a thin rectangle of light shone from inside. Mary Devereaux stepped out and saw three pale faces and a pale torso. "You come down from there!"
Spider reared away from the light, and the added weight of his wet wings overbalanced him and sent him tumbling from the bay tree, biting back curses until he hit the ground and the breath was knocked out of him.
"Are you okay?" Zane called down.
"Do I look okay?" Spider snapped.
"You look like roadkill," Yakko pointed out helpfully.
Mary started across the lawn towards Spider. Zane and Yakko climbed out of the tree far more carefully, and Zane was equally careful to hide his face from Mary. While down below, Spider clambered to his feet.
When they reached the bottom of the trunk, Yakko looked over at Zane. "Can't you get us out of here? Don't you have a horse?"
Zane glanced towards the edge of the lot and saw Binky waiting patiently, with a look of decided amusement on his equine face. The three boys scrambled onto the horse, Yakko planting his hand firmly on Spider's ass and giving him a boost.
"I'm calling the police!" Mary called. "You perverts, spying on teenage girls! What would your mothers say?"
"Well, I think we're off the hook there," Spider said.
"Zane! Zane, is that you?" Mary shouted, peering at the three boys.
"Go, Binky! Go!" Zane yelled. The horse bolted off into the darkness. "Fly like the wind!"
***
"This is a really good bachelor party," Zane said, toasting a marshmallow. "This is the sort of thing I could really get behind. We should keep this in mind for the future, not that I plan to ever need another bachelor party." He prodded his nose gratefully now that it was back to normal.
"I live to please," Spider said sarcastically. "Except for the living part."
"If we were going to do this the whole time, we should have just done this and saved ourselves the cold and the falling out of trees part," Yakko said. "Although the nurses were hot."
"If Tina should ask, all we did was just make s'mores," stated Zane.
Yakko blew out the flame on his marshmallow. "So, Spider, if you can do the funky eye thing and make us teenagers and age us up again, why couldn't you zap us out of the tree? Or zap the shirts off the nurses?"
Spider groaned and facepalmed. "That would have been the smart thing, right? But apparently stupid teenage boy hormones don't allow for that sort of higher reasoning."
"Mmmm, s'mores," said Yakko.
***
That is it from Doc, Ang and Lark. I hope you all enjoyed our alcoholic collaboration. ^_^