Don't believe that the weather is perfect the day that you die.
Subject stolen from a line out of the song "The truth about heaven" by Armor for Sleep. That song really needs to be made into an SPN AU *ponders*.
Moving on.
I'm not sure what this post will be about actually. I just kind of felt like writing...something. I'm feeling particularly useless/blase so writing a post seemed appropriate XD.
My Dean? Yeah, i kind of want to hug you forever. It breaks my heart EVERY SINGLE TIME you don't feel good enough. It's like a blade being inserted into my very essence each time some idiot makes you doubt how utterly amazing you are. God I wish I could just shake your insecurities right out of you.
I know I can't though.
I use to reside in that place. That dark little hole in the ground with the clever name sorrow, that sucks the happiness straight out of the earth around you and only gets deeper the more you try to escape. Yeah. The short version? IT SUCKS HARDER THAN ANYTHING ANYONE ELSE COULD EVER CONCEIVE FOR YOU. That place right there? That place that dwells deep in the recesses of your mind? Is the hardest place ever to get out of. I still visit it from time to time. It's like visiting the worst in-laws EVER who also tote flamethrowers and like to disembowel your entrails just for the hell of it.
The point though? The point is that I can't help you out of that hole. No metaphorical rope is long enough. HOWEVER-You can climb up the sides. But that's not something I can help with. That fact tears my heart straight from my chest.
My point though? My point is that I'll be waiting at the top for you. I promise. No matter what, I'll be at the top waving you on with promises of promiscuous sex and SPN/LOST awesome and love. Always love. I love you. And I know you can make it out. And if not? You better scootch over (just a scotch) cause otherwise my fat ass'll have to jump in after you. Misery loves company right? We'll make fun of the creatures in the dark down there with flagrant insults and rude hand gestures.
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Now onto my other most precious friend--I'm sorry I missed your mother being an ASSHOLE...again >_>. I just read your journal tonight cause I've been off the computer with this sickness and I just wish I could have been there to talk you through it. I know your family life lately has been shit. Complete shit in fact. And I wish more than anything that I could somehow change some of that. All I know is that maybe, just hopefully, something will change and it will get better. I love you. And I'm waiting for you too, whenever you need me, flailing around being a cheerleader just cause. You already know you're AMAZING, but I'm going to tell you so anyway XD.
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OK! Other news....UM....Star trek actually kinda kicked ass O__O. My uncle (the crazy one) got it for mom for her BERF-day and we watched it today. I was surprised by the level of awesome. I was really sad when it was ending actually. Though, a lot of that was I ship Kirk/Spock SO HARD IT HURTS, and they hadn't even really became friends yet. BUT, I really love that the storyline included this kind of time warp thing (it's a main plot point, so no spoilery ^^) that revealed that they became REALLY good friends later on, and I love time warpy stuff anyway, SO MY GLEE COULD NOT BE CONTAINED!
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BERF DAY UPDATE! Heeee ^___^
Soooo, mom wasn't all that bad yesterday when I came home. Just the same *stares at, "I'm so dissapointed in you, you're stupid, irresponsible, yada yada"* as usual. But, she did say that instead of giving me a birthday party this year, she was just going to give me a cake/present on Wednesday, and i can do all my celebrating with you guys. She originally did this to be mean, but by the end if morphed to her doing it because she knew I'd really like to party with you guys. SOOOO, if Cas's mom will allow *giggles cause Cas doesn't have a mom on the show...then realizes that Cas REALLY doesn't have a mom in the show....gets immensely sad* my plan for awesome would be for us to go to Knox on Saturday and then have the party Sunday afternoon. This plan involves your mom being out of the house for two days however T_T, but hopefully she'll go along with it. THE PRINCESS THEME STILL STANDS XD
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I think that's about it.
OH AND IT'S LESS THAN A WEEK TIL SUPERNATURAL GUYS. FREAK THE FUCK OUT!