[oh hey it's megaman]
[oh hey he looks both really angry and confused]
Okay, look. No matter what this woman...
[He holds up a holo picture of
fistbump2verify]
... says to you?
I.
Am.
NOT.
her boyfriend.
I don't even know her. I'm not obligated to do any boyfriendy things and I'm not interested in being ANYBODY'S boyfriend, thanks.
[RRRRGHThat's all
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Comments 53
Congratulations!
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[ The most meaningful look. ]
You need to put a stop to this right now. Before she does something supid that you will both regret! Like maybe luring you to her lair and putting on a pretty dress and smooching the shit out of you. Bleagh.
I suggest telling her that you are already Earth human married. Loudly. From a distance.
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I'm trying! Trust me, I'm trying, but when I asked her if we could break up she told me I had to fill out nine hundred pages of paperwork.
So I am, because to hell with this, but damn!
And if I told her THAT she'd just give me more forms. Also, I can't be earth human married, as I am not a human.
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But okay! Not working for you. Fine! But at least be assertive. God. Don't just lie back and take her stupid dumb form-based-hoofbeastshit! Because that sends a message. A message that tells her that she can totally bulgefuck you in eighty different ways if she has the right paperwork!
[...]
Not. Literally.
[...]
Wait, no, scratch that. Maybe literally.
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She's a human though, I can't hurt her, which is what I'd do if she was a robot. Er. and. To. Clarify, I don't hurt anybody who isn't a robot. Strict robot-only hurting policy here.
But anyway I really really hope she doesn't do that because I don't even think I'm properly equipped for that sort of thing, also it seems disgusting and it'd probably mess up my geafadlsjf AUGH don't. Want to think. About it.
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Proto at least knows Kim, right, they were friends first? This lady just kissed me on the street because of mistletoe spores! I don't even know her!
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Spores. Sure thing Mega. Come on, ya don't have ta make up some excuse ta me.
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