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Uuuuuuuuuuuuuurgh. Bad mood with bad, nasty, unjustified, irrational feelings.
Oooh I just hate people.
Time for a rant.
Shall I correct the above statement about hating people?
I hate guys.
Correction.
I hate Matt.
And... other people.
I hate crap. And stuff. And lotsa other things that I want to specify, but feel it would just be retarded to do so.
Matt has grown a whole freaking foot, made buddies with Stephanie again, and I hate it. I wish that stupid asshole hadn't made friends with me, and I wish I would have had the foresight not to make friends with him.
I hate that I'm his friend but he doesn't even notice me.
Not how I want him to.
I hate feeling sorry for myself because I feel that no one else will. Self pity then turns into self loathing for being so self centered and selfish. Self. Thats what I'm all about. Me me me. Can't even think about anyone else.
I hate how I'm treated sometimes. But I can't really expect any better if I don't treat people decently myself.
It's times like these where I wish I was somewhere else that would make me feel better. But honestly, I can't think of anywhere, which is scary, cuz it makes me think I'd be better off dead or sleeping. Or the people who have to deal with me would be better off anyway.
Wish I could be different, wish that I could have inside me what people want but never see in me because I lack it.
I want to be wanted by the people I want dammit. That truly is what I want.
I see people grow and slip away from me but really they're not any further than what the usual distance was because a scrub like me never had a chance to begin with.
AND I THINK PERSON "A" NEEDS TO STOP FILANDERING (yes i said filandering) WITH PERSON "B" OUT OF FUCKING CONSIDERATION OF PERSON "C'S" FEELINGS!!!
*sigh* I'm done for now.
In other news, I took Kerry to go see The Village and it was awesome. I had a great time, and I thank you Kerry for spending a part of your day with moi!
Oooh I just hate people.
Time for a rant.
Shall I correct the above statement about hating people?
I hate guys.
Correction.
I hate Matt.
And... other people.
I hate crap. And stuff. And lotsa other things that I want to specify, but feel it would just be retarded to do so.
Matt has grown a whole freaking foot, made buddies with Stephanie again, and I hate it. I wish that stupid asshole hadn't made friends with me, and I wish I would have had the foresight not to make friends with him.
I hate that I'm his friend but he doesn't even notice me.
Not how I want him to.
I hate feeling sorry for myself because I feel that no one else will. Self pity then turns into self loathing for being so self centered and selfish. Self. Thats what I'm all about. Me me me. Can't even think about anyone else.
I hate how I'm treated sometimes. But I can't really expect any better if I don't treat people decently myself.
It's times like these where I wish I was somewhere else that would make me feel better. But honestly, I can't think of anywhere, which is scary, cuz it makes me think I'd be better off dead or sleeping. Or the people who have to deal with me would be better off anyway.
Wish I could be different, wish that I could have inside me what people want but never see in me because I lack it.
I want to be wanted by the people I want dammit. That truly is what I want.
I see people grow and slip away from me but really they're not any further than what the usual distance was because a scrub like me never had a chance to begin with.
AND I THINK PERSON "A" NEEDS TO STOP FILANDERING (yes i said filandering) WITH PERSON "B" OUT OF FUCKING CONSIDERATION OF PERSON "C'S" FEELINGS!!!
*sigh* I'm done for now.
In other news, I took Kerry to go see The Village and it was awesome. I had a great time, and I thank you Kerry for spending a part of your day with moi!