Comments | sionek: "haiku po polsku" по-русски

sionek

"haiku po polsku" по-русски

May 18, 2005 14:29

Haiku from May issue of "haiku po polsku"

исправьте мои ошибки, плийз ;-)

--------------------------------------------------

droga przez łąkę
z każdym krokiem
jeden skok żaby

тропинка через луг
с каждым шагом
прыжок лягушки Aneta Michelucci/tr.G.S. + LJ friends ( Read more... )

Comments 20

synthesizer June 24 2005, 14:11:15 UTC

а с первым я бы так поступил

тропинка через луг
я - шаг
лягушка - прыг

так гораздо живее.

sionek June 25 2005, 07:32:05 UTC

Yes, it is very live and suggestive, similar to
the poem of Julian Tuwim "Lokomotywa",
known by all Polish children.
There are verses:
...
para - buch
koła - w ruch
...

my translation ;-)
...
steam - booh
wheels - move
...

But I try to teach my authors to be much more better than me,
to be close to the Masters' hokku.
I have published this haiku because
1) there in no "I" - "I" is only in one of interpretations
(the main one).
2) there is no reason-result scheme - only correlation between
a step and a jump. In one of interpretations it is a frog
jumping and I/somebody only steps on the empty place.

Your version is a story (one after another), while the
original is a discovery (the word "each") of correlation,
a ~surprise. In your version the frog is still visible,
in the original a frog appears while it jumps ;-)

I want to propagate such kind of haiku in Poland.

Best regards,
Grzegorz

synthesizer June 26 2005, 15:54:03 UTC

Вот-вот. Тувим замечательный! У него есть, чему поучиться. Даже и тому, как писать хайку:-)

Если настаиваете: victuar July 11 2005, 03:29:38 UTC

"Поправьте меня" либо "исправьте мои ошибки"... 8^)

Czest!

Jacek Margolak turfsmoke July 31 2005, 08:23:42 UTC

Hi Sionek, I'm the managing editor of Lishanu journal ( http://lishanu.com )

I read Jacek Margolak's haiku on your page, and wonder if you can help me contact him. Whenever I email him I get back a message:
"550 Brak rekordu SPF/MX nadawcy lub brak poprawnej autoryzacji SMTP!"

Do you know of any way I can contact him? You can contact me at editor-AT-lishanu-DOT-com (-AT-=@ -DOT-=.)

Thanks for any help you can offer.

Re: Jacek Margolak sionek July 31 2005, 18:32:04 UTC

Hi,
Jacek Margolak writes his blog at http://haikuworld.blox.pl/html
You can make a note there. I will also write him to check the blog.
As I know Jacek doesn't know English, but he knows Russian and German.

Good luck for your jurnal.
Looking forward to the first issue.
Grzegorz

evgenyivanov September 2 2005, 14:00:51 UTC

Добрый день! Хочу еще раз Вас пригласить посмотреть, на новый проект переводов хайку. Мне бы хотелось, чтобы Вы там разместили свои хайку для того, чтобы мы могли их перевести.)))
Из неприятных для Вас известий, из болгарии сайт http://haiku.az.pl/ не открывается вовсе. уже два дня(((((((((

GNU FDL and public domain sionek September 3 2005, 19:43:03 UTC

Evgeny,

I am not sure if you understand GNU FDL and public domain. You have my permission to translate anything you can find in the Internet signed Grzegorz Sionkowski, but I want to keep my copyrights. You have even my permission to include the originals at your private website, but you are not allowed to suggest anybody that my haiku are public domain - you cannot do it at Wiki and similar websites.
Wiki is good to distribute information, but not someone's poems. What is GNU FDL? GNU FDL means that anybody can change one letter in your translation and sign it e.g. Jan Kowalski. And then he can print it (even commercially) without asking anybody for any permission.

Best regards,
Grzegorz