I have a problem

[sirmatthew]

I have moments in my life that I can't communicate. The words escape me. The words embarass me. Attempting to explain them makes me feel alien and disconnected, as much as the actual experiences themselves make me feel whole and human

Comments

[shadoequin]

Honestly? This is why I write. Because when I'm talking to people, I can feel some unsocialized awkward part of my brain throwing out flak, handing me weak words and vomiting up silences and telling me to "shut up shut up shut up these people don't want to hear you!" When I write, I can pretend that I'm writing to an audience, even if it's just one person, who really, really cares what I have to say. I've learned to accept that I can't be the storyteller when my complete lack of self-esteem is trying to sabotage my voice, but I can still write, so it's okay. What I'm saying is, you can do this. You still have words, you still have the passion, and the passion, the passion is the important thing, not how you get the words to your audience. (Though I know it can be vexing.) I repeat passion--I cannot say it often enough, because that is everything. It is the one coin which cannot be counterfeited

[sirmatthew]

That's one of the reasons I decided to join Towson's writing track, and one of the reasons I posted this rantish plea to LJ.

Ditto on the loss of control. I don't know how well that's going to go over if I do decide to teach (one of my possible post-degree plans).

[daceramp]

You made some good points there. I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your blog.