(no subject)
Title: don't burn out yet, because I still love you (part 2/2)
Author: sitiisinsane
Pairing: Kyuhyun/Eunhyuk (robot!eunhyuk)
Word Count: 3025
Genre: Romance & slight angst
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Super Junior boys
Part 1 here
‘’He’s going to stop functioning altogether soon.’’
Kyuhyun wants to throw things, smash them, yell at someone, demand that someone fix Hyukjae, but instead, he calmly thanks Leeteuk and ends the call. It’s unthinkable - the thought of not having Hyukjae around. It’s then that he realizes that the male is at the dining table, and that he has shut down once again; sitting motionless in the chair, eyes glassy and arms limp by his side. Kyuhyun squashes down the fear that threatens to loom over him as he recalls Leeteuk’s words.
‘’Before it gets too difficult for you, you should return him now and-‘’
No, that wasn’t an option. Anything but that. Funny how when Hyukjae had first arrived, Kyuhyun was the one who had felt awkward, not used to the presence of another person in the apartment. Now? He couldn’t imagine going back to how his life used to be. He walks over to the older male and gently lifts him up, carrying him towards the bedroom before plugging the wire into the underside of the robot’s wrist. The male stirs within ten minutes.
‘’It happened again, didn’t it?’’ He asks. ‘’Kyuhyun, maybe I should send myself for servicing-‘’
‘’No!’’ The other male shrinks back slightly, taken aback by the sudden reply. ‘’I mean, you don’t have to. I called Leeteuk about it and he said they’re just doing some…thingy with the software.’’
He’s not sure if he should be guilty or relived when Hyukjae remains silent, apparently accepting the answer.
x.x
These days, Hyukjae shuts down at least four times a day. There are days when Kyuhyun would come home and he’d find the older male motionless; sometimes in the toilet, on the couch or in the middle of doing things (lucky most of the electronic devices in the house had been programmed to shut down after fifteen minutes of inactivity). The worst would be when the male would suddenly go limp while they were….well, doing that.
‘’Is something bothering you? You’ve been…not yourself lately.’’ Hyukjae questions as they lay side by side on the carpet, the deck of cards they had been been playing with before discarded at the side. ‘’It’s really weird to not hear your horrible singing in the bathroom.’’
Kyuhyun kicks at the older male’s shin. ‘’Liar, you love my singing.’’
‘’I have no idea what gave you that idea.’’ Hyukjae props himself up on one elbow and narrows his eyes. ‘’You’re not thinking of leaving me, are you?’’
But you are. You are going to leave me.
Kyuhyun gives his lover one of his eye rolls, but pulls the other close, managing a grin.
‘’Nope, you’re stuck with me forever.’’
‘’Yuck.’’ But Hyukjae kisses him - soft and sweet, and once again, Kyuhyun struggles to push down the feeling of overwhelming sadness.
x.x
They make a silly pair; Hyukjae in his oversized sushi-print pajamas, and Kyuhyun in his silly pink pajamas (don’t even ask), dancing in the living room to a slow song that was playing on the radio. The song is ridiculously sappy, and Hyukjae giggles when he accidentally trods on his lover’s right foot. There’s more foot-stepping, giggles and failed twirls (Kyuhyun nearly falls on the coffee table) and then-
And then, there is Hyukjae, slumped against him as he shuts down for the 4th time that day.
x.x
[2 weeks later]
Kyuhyun has the fright of his life when he hooks the charger to the underside of Hyukjae’s wrist, and after fifteen minutes, the male is still motionless.
‘’Come on.’’ He mutters, flicking the on/off switch. ‘’Please, come on.’’
The manual is useless, and his hands are trembling, palms clammy as he dials the number he has come to dislike. Leeteuk answers on the third ring.
‘’He’s not waking up. It’s been twenty minutes. Is he-? You told me he has at least three months left, so why the fuck is he not waking up?!’’ He’s yelling, and it’s so unlike him, but he’s terrified.
‘’Kyuhyun.’’ The older male sounds calm, despite the fact that he had someone yelling at him. ‘’You need to calm down. It’s going to take him a longer time to recharge, now that the system is reaching its limit. It’ll take at least an hour for him to recharge.’’
According to Leeteuk, the charging time for Hyukjae would gradually take longer until it reaches a point where he wouldn’t be able to be charged anymore. He mumbles an apology, slightly embarrassed that he had lost his cool.
x.x
‘’Are you trying to feed an army?’’
He had entered the kitchen to find Hyukjae packing food into Tupperware’s and storing them inside the fridge. The next day, there were post-it notes on the different food items in the kitchen, with the expiry dates on it. Kyuhyun is slightly bewildered, but shrugs it off, knowing how organized the older male was.
Kyuhyun sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night to Hyukjae hugging him tight, pressed closely against him. That’s when he realizes that the male is no longer as warm as he used to be.
x.x
‘’I really love you, you know.’’ Hyukjae blurts out all of a sudden as they’re hanging up the laundry.
Kyuhyun grins at him. ‘’That’s nice to know. I mean, of course I’m aware of the fact that you’re head over heels in love with me. Who wouldn’t be-‘’
Hyukjae throws a pair of shorts at him, and Kyuhyun makes a grab for it before it hits his face. He laughs and curls his fingers around the other’s wrist, bringing it up to his lips. Hyukjae may be a robot, but his cheeks have no trouble turning pink at the romantic gesture.
‘’I love you too.’’ He murmurs, a tad embarrassed
Hyukjae flashes him that smile; all gums and crinkling eyes, and Kyuhyun can’t exactly pinpoint why, but a wave of dread settles over him.
x.x
Kyuhyun is in a splendid mood. His boss had announced a pay rise (fucking finally!), traffic on the way home was wonderfully smooth, and he had even bought a box of Hyukjae’s favorite banana cheese cupcakes to celebrate. And oh! The cleaning lady downstairs hadn’t yelled at him for knocking over her pail of water. So, that was good.
He’s in such a good mood that he even places his shoes by the door neatly, instead of leaving it lying around like he usually does. However, to his disappointment, the apartment is empty. The older male had probably gone out with Ryeowook (he wonders if the both of them ever talk about robot-y stuff).
Kyuhyun wouldn’t deny the fact that he kind of envies Jongwoon, because Ryeowook is a newer model and his system will never fail. Kyuhyun shakes his head, not wanting to spoil his mood with such thoughts. His cell phone vibrates in the pocket of his trousers and Kyuhyun answers it, not bothering to look at the screen. It was probably Hyukjae, asking if they would need more tomatoes or clothes peg.
‘’No, we don’t need anything else for the kitchen. Okay, maybe you could get more lube-‘’
‘’Kyuhyun.’’
‘’Well, shit.’’ Kyuhyun curses.
He had just said the word ‘lube’ to Leeteuk. Talk about awkward.
‘’Yes.’’ He clears his throat. ‘’Sorry about that. Is anything the matter?’’
‘’I’m calling to inform you…’’ The male on the other life seems to be struggling to find the words. ‘’This is going to be difficult but…Hyukjae came to return himself today.’’
‘’What do you mean return himself?’’
All the emotions he had struggled to keep bottled inside threatens to break out of the cage.
‘’He knows, Kyuhyun. He’s known for some time that he was going to cease functioning altogether. He came to…shut himself down before it happens.’’
Kyuhyun grips the phone tightly in his hand, feeling as if his knees might buckle any moment. The cage in him rattles.
‘’No. No, tell him to come home.’’ He says dazedly. ‘’Please, tell him to come back. He can’t do this.’’ Kyuhyun is beyond caring that he is actually begging. ‘’Let me speak to him. Please.’’
The few seconds of silence that stretches on feels like an eternity.
‘’Hyukjae.’’ Kyuhyun utters the moment he hears the faint breathing on the other line.’’ Hyukjae, come home right now. What’s the meaning of this? You think I’m just going to let you leave me like this?’’ There’s no answer, but Kyuhyun knows the male is listening. ‘’You could have said something, Hyuk. You can’t hurt me like this.’’
There’s a shuddering intake of breath and-
‘’I love you, Cho Kyuhyun. More than I thought I ever will.’’
And the line goes dead.
x.x
Kyuhyun thinks it really shouldn’t end like this. He’s not entirely sure how long he sits on the floor, staring at nothing and he thinks he might have cried. It’s painful to the point where he feels numb from it. He doesn’t understand, he really doesn’t.
x.x
So, that was what it was all about; the extra food, tagging the expiry date on the food items…Hyukjae was trying to take care of him without being there. But it wasn’t the same. It never will be.
Kyuhyun staggers into the bedroom and flops down onto the bed, shifting when something pokes him in the back. It’s a medium-sized dark blue notebook, one that he has not seen before. He flips it open, and is greeted with a picture of Hyukjae and he taped on the first page. He remembers this; it’s a snapshot that Yesung had helped them snap, a year after he had purchased Hyukjae. Kyuhyun flips through the notebook, and there are entries dating all the way back to 2004 (the year he had made the purchase). He flips the pages until he reaches the more recent entries.
20 August
I’ve been shutting down lately, even before my battery runs out. There’s probably some glitch somewhere. I think I hear Kyuhyun. He’s going to laugh at me if he sees me writing in this notebook (and he was the one who had bought it for me!)
23rd August
It happened again today while I was cooking. When I woke up, I was already in the bedroom. Kyu seems really worried about it. Maybe it’s time for a maintenance check.
27th August
Ryeowook told me today that Sungmin sent himself back to be de-activated. It puzzles me as to why he would do that. I’m feeling a bit…sad, since we were created within the same batch. I wonder why he did that. Oh, I think Kyuhyun’s home. He seems to be in a-
28th August
I shut down in the middle of writing yesterday’s entry. It’s really annoying. Kyuhyun scheduled for me to attend the check-up next week at headquarters. Hopefully Leeteuk will be able to fix whatever that is wrong with me. Kyuhyun is being annoying today. He’s singing some opera song at the top of his lungs. I think the old lady who lives upstairs is going to complain if she sees me at the supermarket tomorrow.
15th September
The results are out! Kyuhyun told me that everything’s fine and that there’s nothing to worry about. Apparently, they’re upgrading something that’s sort of affecting our systems. I asked Ryeowook if he’s experiencing them as well, but he says everything fine.
And Yesung brought a dog home today! The moment the dog saw Kyuhyun, it kept barking and barking, and it even ripped off a small part of his trousers. Hehehe.
18th September
Kyuhyun isn’t being very Kyuhyun-ish lately.
25th September
Recharging took an hour for me today, which is a first. It has never happened before. And the system tells me that my system is reaching its limit soon. I don’t understand. I think I’m going to give Leeteuk a call.
25th September
I think, along the way, I forgot that I am merely a robot. That I’m not human, and I won’t be able to live as long as they do. I’ve managed to live for eight years, when I was only estimated to last six. Leeteuk says my system is going to cease functioning soon, and that there’s nothing he can do to help me. Unless…
It’s risky, and he doesn’t want to do it. He says it’s safer that they take me apart and remodel me. But I don’t want that. I’ll lose all of my memories, everything that I’ve experienced these eight years. And I’ll forget Kyuhyun. Am I angry that he kept the truth from me? Anger is a foreign emotion to me, one that I rarely ‘feel’.
For the first time ever, I desperately wish that I’m human.
30th September
Leeteuk yelled at me today when I asked him about it again today. He says that I’m crazy, that if I go ahead with it, I’ll end up like-
3rd October
Kyu is really bad at taking care of himself. He accidentally added sugar into the ramen, and the dish rag nearly caught fire. How is he going to take care of himself when I’m no longer around?
7th October
I can see the desperation and the fear in his eyes, even though he’s trying to mask it. Kyu isn’t an emotional person, and to see him like this…
I would be lying if I said it breaks my heart, because I do not have one. I am only but a robot, who is nearly human.
16th October
Who says robots are not capable of emotions? Then how do they explain these feelings? The overwhelming fear, desperation, the sadness and the amount of love that I have for him.
I love-
There’s nothing else.
x.x
[Two months later]
No matter what, life still has to go on. Kyuhyun goes to work; 8am-6pm every single day, burying himself in his work and ignoring calls from Yesung, who’s actually doing a bad job of hiding the fact that he’s checking up on Kyuhyun from time to time. Each time he bumps into Ryeowook outside the apartment, it’s like his world is breaking apart all over again, but Ryeowook is not to be blamed. No one is. Kyuhyun detests the silence in the apartment, and if he concentrates enough, he thinks he can hear Hyukjae humming like he usually does in the kitchen. It’s unhealthy, Jongwoon says, to be living like this. He’s tried a few times to persuade Kyuhyun into buying another robot, but the younger male had shot down the idea immediately.
There are nights where he cries into his pillow, no matter how he tries to tell himself that he’ll get through it. He is human. A human who had fallen head over heels in love with a human robot.
x.x
‘’Delivery for Mr. Cho Kyuhyun.’’
Kyuhyun stares at the delivery man, and the huge rectangular box that was in the hallway. That all-too familiar box with the logo printed at the right-hand corner.
‘’I didn’t-‘’
‘’It’s the correct address dude.’’ The male shoves the clipboard at him, and Kyuhyun is too dazed to be irked by the male’s rude attitude.
He signs it and the delivery male leaves as soon as he wheels the box into the apartment. There’s no doubt about it. It’s that box. The exact same one that had been delivered to his apartment in 2004. Was it a kind of sick joke or something? But he’s curious, because ever since that day, he’s not contacted or been contacted by anyone from the company.
Kyuhyun realizes that his hands are shaky as he peels away the tape, the box falling apart to reveal-
No. No, it can’t be. How could it be? Who would play such a cruel trick on him?
A robot.
Someone had delivered him a robot.
There’s a soft, whirring sound and Kyuhyun stumbles back. As far as he was concerned, the robots were not programmed to activate by themselves. But this robot was activating itself, which really shouldn’t be possible. Kyuhyun’s torn between wanting to freak out and running out of the house and seeing what happens next. The resemblance was uncanny. From head to toe, it was as if someone had cloned him and-
‘’Who are you?’’ He whispers, when those eyes finally open.
‘’Lee Hyukjae.’’ The robot answers, and that voice-
Kyuhyun shakes his head in disbelief, taking another step back. ‘’No. No, you can’t be. You can’t be.’’ He feels pinpricks of anger now, and he clenches his fists.
‘’Code Name: Lee Hyukjae. Robot ID 200156. Originally created on 20th October 2002. Date of first purchase: 3rd February 2004. Services terminated on 16th October 2012.’’ Kyuhyun’s eyes widens and he takes in a shuddering breath. This is impossible.
‘’Former and current owner…’’ There’s a pause, and the corners of the robot’s lips tilt up in a small smile. ‘’…Cho Kyuhyun.’’
x.x
Kyuhyun
I apologize that I wasn’t able to tell you anything. You must have got quite a shock. When Hyukjae came to me, it wasn’t to de-activate himself entirely. He wanted me to make certain adjustments to his software and system, so that he wouldn’t have to be taken apart and remodeled. With a system and software as outdated as his, it was risky. But it was what he really wanted. Hyukjae was afraid that it wouldn’t work and he didn’t want to give you any false hope. I used to have a robot like him. A robot that I love, even though she’s scrap metal now, up till today. I had her for 7 years and that was her limit. Like you, I was desperate. Maybe it was that desperation that made me fail. Her system couldn’t take whatever adjustments I was trying to make. All I can say is, Hyukjae is lucky. He is a robot, but he is also human in his own way.
There might be some side effects, but it won’t be anything too serious. Make sure you send him for maintenance regularly. This is my first attempt in updating the software in such an outdated system, but I have faith in Hyukjae. Again, I apologize.
All the best to the both of you.
Leeteuk
x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x
Kyuhyun presses his thumb against the underside of Hyukjae's wrist, where it would read his thumbprint and acknowledge and confirm him as Hyukjae's owner.
''Welcome home.''
(end)
x: Instead of being taken apart & remodeled, Hyukjae went to Leeteuk to get him to make certain adjustments to him (install the new software in him,while he was still running with the old system). So,he didn't lose his memories! *yay* When Hyukjae returned,he was still the same robot - with memories intact and everything :>
A/N: I'm not entirely satisfied with it (but I'm still kind of pleased~), but I just had to get it out! This is what happens when you're bored in the office with absolutely no work to do. Concrit would be most wonderful! :> And I have a few more drabbles/oneshots that I'm currently working on ^_^
Author: sitiisinsane
Pairing: Kyuhyun/Eunhyuk (robot!eunhyuk)
Word Count: 3025
Genre: Romance & slight angst
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Super Junior boys
Part 1 here
‘’He’s going to stop functioning altogether soon.’’
Kyuhyun wants to throw things, smash them, yell at someone, demand that someone fix Hyukjae, but instead, he calmly thanks Leeteuk and ends the call. It’s unthinkable - the thought of not having Hyukjae around. It’s then that he realizes that the male is at the dining table, and that he has shut down once again; sitting motionless in the chair, eyes glassy and arms limp by his side. Kyuhyun squashes down the fear that threatens to loom over him as he recalls Leeteuk’s words.
‘’Before it gets too difficult for you, you should return him now and-‘’
No, that wasn’t an option. Anything but that. Funny how when Hyukjae had first arrived, Kyuhyun was the one who had felt awkward, not used to the presence of another person in the apartment. Now? He couldn’t imagine going back to how his life used to be. He walks over to the older male and gently lifts him up, carrying him towards the bedroom before plugging the wire into the underside of the robot’s wrist. The male stirs within ten minutes.
‘’It happened again, didn’t it?’’ He asks. ‘’Kyuhyun, maybe I should send myself for servicing-‘’
‘’No!’’ The other male shrinks back slightly, taken aback by the sudden reply. ‘’I mean, you don’t have to. I called Leeteuk about it and he said they’re just doing some…thingy with the software.’’
He’s not sure if he should be guilty or relived when Hyukjae remains silent, apparently accepting the answer.
x.x
These days, Hyukjae shuts down at least four times a day. There are days when Kyuhyun would come home and he’d find the older male motionless; sometimes in the toilet, on the couch or in the middle of doing things (lucky most of the electronic devices in the house had been programmed to shut down after fifteen minutes of inactivity). The worst would be when the male would suddenly go limp while they were….well, doing that.
‘’Is something bothering you? You’ve been…not yourself lately.’’ Hyukjae questions as they lay side by side on the carpet, the deck of cards they had been been playing with before discarded at the side. ‘’It’s really weird to not hear your horrible singing in the bathroom.’’
Kyuhyun kicks at the older male’s shin. ‘’Liar, you love my singing.’’
‘’I have no idea what gave you that idea.’’ Hyukjae props himself up on one elbow and narrows his eyes. ‘’You’re not thinking of leaving me, are you?’’
But you are. You are going to leave me.
Kyuhyun gives his lover one of his eye rolls, but pulls the other close, managing a grin.
‘’Nope, you’re stuck with me forever.’’
‘’Yuck.’’ But Hyukjae kisses him - soft and sweet, and once again, Kyuhyun struggles to push down the feeling of overwhelming sadness.
x.x
They make a silly pair; Hyukjae in his oversized sushi-print pajamas, and Kyuhyun in his silly pink pajamas (don’t even ask), dancing in the living room to a slow song that was playing on the radio. The song is ridiculously sappy, and Hyukjae giggles when he accidentally trods on his lover’s right foot. There’s more foot-stepping, giggles and failed twirls (Kyuhyun nearly falls on the coffee table) and then-
And then, there is Hyukjae, slumped against him as he shuts down for the 4th time that day.
x.x
[2 weeks later]
Kyuhyun has the fright of his life when he hooks the charger to the underside of Hyukjae’s wrist, and after fifteen minutes, the male is still motionless.
‘’Come on.’’ He mutters, flicking the on/off switch. ‘’Please, come on.’’
The manual is useless, and his hands are trembling, palms clammy as he dials the number he has come to dislike. Leeteuk answers on the third ring.
‘’He’s not waking up. It’s been twenty minutes. Is he-? You told me he has at least three months left, so why the fuck is he not waking up?!’’ He’s yelling, and it’s so unlike him, but he’s terrified.
‘’Kyuhyun.’’ The older male sounds calm, despite the fact that he had someone yelling at him. ‘’You need to calm down. It’s going to take him a longer time to recharge, now that the system is reaching its limit. It’ll take at least an hour for him to recharge.’’
According to Leeteuk, the charging time for Hyukjae would gradually take longer until it reaches a point where he wouldn’t be able to be charged anymore. He mumbles an apology, slightly embarrassed that he had lost his cool.
x.x
‘’Are you trying to feed an army?’’
He had entered the kitchen to find Hyukjae packing food into Tupperware’s and storing them inside the fridge. The next day, there were post-it notes on the different food items in the kitchen, with the expiry dates on it. Kyuhyun is slightly bewildered, but shrugs it off, knowing how organized the older male was.
Kyuhyun sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night to Hyukjae hugging him tight, pressed closely against him. That’s when he realizes that the male is no longer as warm as he used to be.
x.x
‘’I really love you, you know.’’ Hyukjae blurts out all of a sudden as they’re hanging up the laundry.
Kyuhyun grins at him. ‘’That’s nice to know. I mean, of course I’m aware of the fact that you’re head over heels in love with me. Who wouldn’t be-‘’
Hyukjae throws a pair of shorts at him, and Kyuhyun makes a grab for it before it hits his face. He laughs and curls his fingers around the other’s wrist, bringing it up to his lips. Hyukjae may be a robot, but his cheeks have no trouble turning pink at the romantic gesture.
‘’I love you too.’’ He murmurs, a tad embarrassed
Hyukjae flashes him that smile; all gums and crinkling eyes, and Kyuhyun can’t exactly pinpoint why, but a wave of dread settles over him.
x.x
Kyuhyun is in a splendid mood. His boss had announced a pay rise (fucking finally!), traffic on the way home was wonderfully smooth, and he had even bought a box of Hyukjae’s favorite banana cheese cupcakes to celebrate. And oh! The cleaning lady downstairs hadn’t yelled at him for knocking over her pail of water. So, that was good.
He’s in such a good mood that he even places his shoes by the door neatly, instead of leaving it lying around like he usually does. However, to his disappointment, the apartment is empty. The older male had probably gone out with Ryeowook (he wonders if the both of them ever talk about robot-y stuff).
Kyuhyun wouldn’t deny the fact that he kind of envies Jongwoon, because Ryeowook is a newer model and his system will never fail. Kyuhyun shakes his head, not wanting to spoil his mood with such thoughts. His cell phone vibrates in the pocket of his trousers and Kyuhyun answers it, not bothering to look at the screen. It was probably Hyukjae, asking if they would need more tomatoes or clothes peg.
‘’No, we don’t need anything else for the kitchen. Okay, maybe you could get more lube-‘’
‘’Kyuhyun.’’
‘’Well, shit.’’ Kyuhyun curses.
He had just said the word ‘lube’ to Leeteuk. Talk about awkward.
‘’Yes.’’ He clears his throat. ‘’Sorry about that. Is anything the matter?’’
‘’I’m calling to inform you…’’ The male on the other life seems to be struggling to find the words. ‘’This is going to be difficult but…Hyukjae came to return himself today.’’
‘’What do you mean return himself?’’
All the emotions he had struggled to keep bottled inside threatens to break out of the cage.
‘’He knows, Kyuhyun. He’s known for some time that he was going to cease functioning altogether. He came to…shut himself down before it happens.’’
Kyuhyun grips the phone tightly in his hand, feeling as if his knees might buckle any moment. The cage in him rattles.
‘’No. No, tell him to come home.’’ He says dazedly. ‘’Please, tell him to come back. He can’t do this.’’ Kyuhyun is beyond caring that he is actually begging. ‘’Let me speak to him. Please.’’
The few seconds of silence that stretches on feels like an eternity.
‘’Hyukjae.’’ Kyuhyun utters the moment he hears the faint breathing on the other line.’’ Hyukjae, come home right now. What’s the meaning of this? You think I’m just going to let you leave me like this?’’ There’s no answer, but Kyuhyun knows the male is listening. ‘’You could have said something, Hyuk. You can’t hurt me like this.’’
There’s a shuddering intake of breath and-
‘’I love you, Cho Kyuhyun. More than I thought I ever will.’’
And the line goes dead.
x.x
Kyuhyun thinks it really shouldn’t end like this. He’s not entirely sure how long he sits on the floor, staring at nothing and he thinks he might have cried. It’s painful to the point where he feels numb from it. He doesn’t understand, he really doesn’t.
x.x
So, that was what it was all about; the extra food, tagging the expiry date on the food items…Hyukjae was trying to take care of him without being there. But it wasn’t the same. It never will be.
Kyuhyun staggers into the bedroom and flops down onto the bed, shifting when something pokes him in the back. It’s a medium-sized dark blue notebook, one that he has not seen before. He flips it open, and is greeted with a picture of Hyukjae and he taped on the first page. He remembers this; it’s a snapshot that Yesung had helped them snap, a year after he had purchased Hyukjae. Kyuhyun flips through the notebook, and there are entries dating all the way back to 2004 (the year he had made the purchase). He flips the pages until he reaches the more recent entries.
20 August
I’ve been shutting down lately, even before my battery runs out. There’s probably some glitch somewhere. I think I hear Kyuhyun. He’s going to laugh at me if he sees me writing in this notebook (and he was the one who had bought it for me!)
23rd August
It happened again today while I was cooking. When I woke up, I was already in the bedroom. Kyu seems really worried about it. Maybe it’s time for a maintenance check.
27th August
Ryeowook told me today that Sungmin sent himself back to be de-activated. It puzzles me as to why he would do that. I’m feeling a bit…sad, since we were created within the same batch. I wonder why he did that. Oh, I think Kyuhyun’s home. He seems to be in a-
28th August
I shut down in the middle of writing yesterday’s entry. It’s really annoying. Kyuhyun scheduled for me to attend the check-up next week at headquarters. Hopefully Leeteuk will be able to fix whatever that is wrong with me. Kyuhyun is being annoying today. He’s singing some opera song at the top of his lungs. I think the old lady who lives upstairs is going to complain if she sees me at the supermarket tomorrow.
15th September
The results are out! Kyuhyun told me that everything’s fine and that there’s nothing to worry about. Apparently, they’re upgrading something that’s sort of affecting our systems. I asked Ryeowook if he’s experiencing them as well, but he says everything fine.
And Yesung brought a dog home today! The moment the dog saw Kyuhyun, it kept barking and barking, and it even ripped off a small part of his trousers. Hehehe.
18th September
Kyuhyun isn’t being very Kyuhyun-ish lately.
25th September
Recharging took an hour for me today, which is a first. It has never happened before. And the system tells me that my system is reaching its limit soon. I don’t understand. I think I’m going to give Leeteuk a call.
25th September
I think, along the way, I forgot that I am merely a robot. That I’m not human, and I won’t be able to live as long as they do. I’ve managed to live for eight years, when I was only estimated to last six. Leeteuk says my system is going to cease functioning soon, and that there’s nothing he can do to help me. Unless…
It’s risky, and he doesn’t want to do it. He says it’s safer that they take me apart and remodel me. But I don’t want that. I’ll lose all of my memories, everything that I’ve experienced these eight years. And I’ll forget Kyuhyun. Am I angry that he kept the truth from me? Anger is a foreign emotion to me, one that I rarely ‘feel’.
For the first time ever, I desperately wish that I’m human.
30th September
Leeteuk yelled at me today when I asked him about it again today. He says that I’m crazy, that if I go ahead with it, I’ll end up like-
3rd October
Kyu is really bad at taking care of himself. He accidentally added sugar into the ramen, and the dish rag nearly caught fire. How is he going to take care of himself when I’m no longer around?
7th October
I can see the desperation and the fear in his eyes, even though he’s trying to mask it. Kyu isn’t an emotional person, and to see him like this…
I would be lying if I said it breaks my heart, because I do not have one. I am only but a robot, who is nearly human.
16th October
Who says robots are not capable of emotions? Then how do they explain these feelings? The overwhelming fear, desperation, the sadness and the amount of love that I have for him.
I love-
There’s nothing else.
x.x
[Two months later]
No matter what, life still has to go on. Kyuhyun goes to work; 8am-6pm every single day, burying himself in his work and ignoring calls from Yesung, who’s actually doing a bad job of hiding the fact that he’s checking up on Kyuhyun from time to time. Each time he bumps into Ryeowook outside the apartment, it’s like his world is breaking apart all over again, but Ryeowook is not to be blamed. No one is. Kyuhyun detests the silence in the apartment, and if he concentrates enough, he thinks he can hear Hyukjae humming like he usually does in the kitchen. It’s unhealthy, Jongwoon says, to be living like this. He’s tried a few times to persuade Kyuhyun into buying another robot, but the younger male had shot down the idea immediately.
There are nights where he cries into his pillow, no matter how he tries to tell himself that he’ll get through it. He is human. A human who had fallen head over heels in love with a human robot.
x.x
‘’Delivery for Mr. Cho Kyuhyun.’’
Kyuhyun stares at the delivery man, and the huge rectangular box that was in the hallway. That all-too familiar box with the logo printed at the right-hand corner.
‘’I didn’t-‘’
‘’It’s the correct address dude.’’ The male shoves the clipboard at him, and Kyuhyun is too dazed to be irked by the male’s rude attitude.
He signs it and the delivery male leaves as soon as he wheels the box into the apartment. There’s no doubt about it. It’s that box. The exact same one that had been delivered to his apartment in 2004. Was it a kind of sick joke or something? But he’s curious, because ever since that day, he’s not contacted or been contacted by anyone from the company.
Kyuhyun realizes that his hands are shaky as he peels away the tape, the box falling apart to reveal-
No. No, it can’t be. How could it be? Who would play such a cruel trick on him?
A robot.
Someone had delivered him a robot.
There’s a soft, whirring sound and Kyuhyun stumbles back. As far as he was concerned, the robots were not programmed to activate by themselves. But this robot was activating itself, which really shouldn’t be possible. Kyuhyun’s torn between wanting to freak out and running out of the house and seeing what happens next. The resemblance was uncanny. From head to toe, it was as if someone had cloned him and-
‘’Who are you?’’ He whispers, when those eyes finally open.
‘’Lee Hyukjae.’’ The robot answers, and that voice-
Kyuhyun shakes his head in disbelief, taking another step back. ‘’No. No, you can’t be. You can’t be.’’ He feels pinpricks of anger now, and he clenches his fists.
‘’Code Name: Lee Hyukjae. Robot ID 200156. Originally created on 20th October 2002. Date of first purchase: 3rd February 2004. Services terminated on 16th October 2012.’’ Kyuhyun’s eyes widens and he takes in a shuddering breath. This is impossible.
‘’Former and current owner…’’ There’s a pause, and the corners of the robot’s lips tilt up in a small smile. ‘’…Cho Kyuhyun.’’
x.x
Kyuhyun
I apologize that I wasn’t able to tell you anything. You must have got quite a shock. When Hyukjae came to me, it wasn’t to de-activate himself entirely. He wanted me to make certain adjustments to his software and system, so that he wouldn’t have to be taken apart and remodeled. With a system and software as outdated as his, it was risky. But it was what he really wanted. Hyukjae was afraid that it wouldn’t work and he didn’t want to give you any false hope. I used to have a robot like him. A robot that I love, even though she’s scrap metal now, up till today. I had her for 7 years and that was her limit. Like you, I was desperate. Maybe it was that desperation that made me fail. Her system couldn’t take whatever adjustments I was trying to make. All I can say is, Hyukjae is lucky. He is a robot, but he is also human in his own way.
There might be some side effects, but it won’t be anything too serious. Make sure you send him for maintenance regularly. This is my first attempt in updating the software in such an outdated system, but I have faith in Hyukjae. Again, I apologize.
All the best to the both of you.
Leeteuk
x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x
Kyuhyun presses his thumb against the underside of Hyukjae's wrist, where it would read his thumbprint and acknowledge and confirm him as Hyukjae's owner.
''Welcome home.''
(end)
x: Instead of being taken apart & remodeled, Hyukjae went to Leeteuk to get him to make certain adjustments to him (install the new software in him,while he was still running with the old system). So,he didn't lose his memories! *yay* When Hyukjae returned,he was still the same robot - with memories intact and everything :>
A/N: I'm not entirely satisfied with it (but I'm still kind of pleased~), but I just had to get it out! This is what happens when you're bored in the office with absolutely no work to do. Concrit would be most wonderful! :> And I have a few more drabbles/oneshots that I'm currently working on ^_^