Breathe
Title: Breathe
Author: sk_swing
Pairing: Jongkey
Genre: Angst?
Rating: PG
A/N: I have not written anything in years. And when I used to write slash fics it was in a fandom totally unrelated to Kpop. Frickin' Hello Baby made me a Jongkey shipper and I couldn't resist old habits.
One
He remembers the first time he met Kibum, not for how significant it was, but for how insignificant. For the first few months as a trainee you don’t really pay attention to anything but your ambition. If he was going to debut, he needed to focus on that alone. The other trainees could be your future group members or your future competition. Either way, they had to stay out of your way.
They had greeted each other, sized each other up, then moved on. It was such a fleeting moment that even now, even after everything, Jonghyun couldn’t draw out any deeper meaning.
Two
He remembers the first time he made Kibum laugh. He had cracked another bad joke with his signature smile and the other boy had let out an unexpected peal of laughter. After that, Jonghyun’s bad jokes were unstoppable and Kibum’s laughter always followed. As they spent more time with each other their senses of humor started to harmonize, until they built up a rapport of snarky comments and adlibbed roleplays.
He missed those days of careless jokes and casual skinship - an arm around his shoulder, a chuckle against his ear, an unguarded heart.
Three
He remembers the first time he kissed Kibum. They had debuted only recently and the manager had taken the other members to their schedules. Kibum, resisting the restrictions placed on him as he always had, had managed to sneak in a bottle of soju. Okay, maybe a couple bottles, but for two kids who had spent most of their adolescent years training and not partying it was too much either way. He doesn’t remember how it had happened, it just had, and they both wrote it off as an accident to be blamed on alcohol. Just a freak accident.
It was a freak accident the second time too. But after the third time, when they didn’t even need the alcohol, Jonghyun didn’t know what it was. But he liked it.
Four
He remembers the first time they fought. It was inevitable, really. They were with each other all the time, with no room to breathe. Maybe it would have worked out if they didn’t have to hide all the time, if they weren’t committing an unforgivable sin in the eyes of God. Maybe it would have worked out if they weren’t idols, if they weren’t role models for an entire generation. Maybe it would have worked out if they were a little older, if they hadn’t allowed themselves to get carried away by hormones and the egotism that comes with being a teenager.
Maybe, maybe, maybe.
Five
He opens his eyes. It still hurts. His chest aches, and that sensation is the only thing he can focus on. Surely his ribcage must be cracked and gaping to feel like this. He can't bring himself to join the other members. Not yet.
He closes his eyes and waits; tries again.
one. two. three. four. five.
Author: sk_swing
Pairing: Jongkey
Genre: Angst?
Rating: PG
A/N: I have not written anything in years. And when I used to write slash fics it was in a fandom totally unrelated to Kpop. Frickin' Hello Baby made me a Jongkey shipper and I couldn't resist old habits.
One
He remembers the first time he met Kibum, not for how significant it was, but for how insignificant. For the first few months as a trainee you don’t really pay attention to anything but your ambition. If he was going to debut, he needed to focus on that alone. The other trainees could be your future group members or your future competition. Either way, they had to stay out of your way.
They had greeted each other, sized each other up, then moved on. It was such a fleeting moment that even now, even after everything, Jonghyun couldn’t draw out any deeper meaning.
Two
He remembers the first time he made Kibum laugh. He had cracked another bad joke with his signature smile and the other boy had let out an unexpected peal of laughter. After that, Jonghyun’s bad jokes were unstoppable and Kibum’s laughter always followed. As they spent more time with each other their senses of humor started to harmonize, until they built up a rapport of snarky comments and adlibbed roleplays.
He missed those days of careless jokes and casual skinship - an arm around his shoulder, a chuckle against his ear, an unguarded heart.
Three
He remembers the first time he kissed Kibum. They had debuted only recently and the manager had taken the other members to their schedules. Kibum, resisting the restrictions placed on him as he always had, had managed to sneak in a bottle of soju. Okay, maybe a couple bottles, but for two kids who had spent most of their adolescent years training and not partying it was too much either way. He doesn’t remember how it had happened, it just had, and they both wrote it off as an accident to be blamed on alcohol. Just a freak accident.
It was a freak accident the second time too. But after the third time, when they didn’t even need the alcohol, Jonghyun didn’t know what it was. But he liked it.
Four
He remembers the first time they fought. It was inevitable, really. They were with each other all the time, with no room to breathe. Maybe it would have worked out if they didn’t have to hide all the time, if they weren’t committing an unforgivable sin in the eyes of God. Maybe it would have worked out if they weren’t idols, if they weren’t role models for an entire generation. Maybe it would have worked out if they were a little older, if they hadn’t allowed themselves to get carried away by hormones and the egotism that comes with being a teenager.
Maybe, maybe, maybe.
Five
He opens his eyes. It still hurts. His chest aches, and that sensation is the only thing he can focus on. Surely his ribcage must be cracked and gaping to feel like this. He can't bring himself to join the other members. Not yet.
He closes his eyes and waits; tries again.
one. two. three. four. five.