Pride & Presumption Pt 1
As promised, part one of my new fic! This is the first fic I've had beta-read, so I hope it's maginally better than most of my stuff. Thanks, Lora! <3
Summary: The tension is thick after Sirius reveals Remus' secret. James invents a love triangle and Peter has some unpleasant cheese..
He wasn't exactly sure why he'd decided to go for it at that moment, but when Lily had scooped her hair back over her shoulder, revealing that pale, delicate neck, he just couldn't help himself but to lean in and press a kiss gently to her skin.
Lily was a little taken aback by this new move and stiffened immediately. She wanted to be overcome with repulsion or so she told herself, but it was a gentle, nuzzling sort of kiss that made her stomach flutter delightfully. This unnecessary fluttering came as an even greater shock and she immediately lashed her hand across James' face to get him off as though he were some annoying fly.
"Get lost, Potter." She went back to her work.
"Aww, come on Lily, don't be like that." He whined, rubbing his cheek.
"I'll be like 'that' with you until you get it into that obscenely thick head of yours that I'm not interested."
"Don't lie to yourself! Don't deny yourself your hearts desire!" He composed dramatically at her side, flopping his long arms over her work to distract her.
She sighed curtly and put down her quill, she would only grant him this certain amount of attention, as she always did. Just to make him go away.
"You're right, James."
"I am?" He straightened and blinked at her, not quite believing it.
"Yes, I shouldn't deny myself my desires. Would you be a love and fetch me some carrot cake? I don't think I can go on without any."
James' face fell for a moment but he quickly recovered with a sly grin.
"Ohoh, carrot cake, eh? Shall I bring it to you naked? Make it a bit more exciting."
"If you come near me with any less clothing on than you have now, I will curse your eyebrows off again."
"Oh, you tease!"
"Go. Away!"
James knew when to stop, it had taken a few years of practise but by the time summer was drawing near on their 6th year, he had mastered being able to pester Lily just enough that she wouldn't throw a nasty hex at him for it. It seemed to him, as he bounced out of the common room, that she was softening. He was wearing her down and he could only see this as a positive sign. He ducked out of the portrait hole, still on a high from his encounter with The Goddess (a nickname that he tried to circulate several times) when Remus practically ploughed into him on his way in. He looked up, utterly bewildered from his book as James looked at him, his eyebrows raised.
"Remus! Alright?"
"Sorry, James. I'm in a bit of rush." He said, almost at a pant. He was fidgety, distracted. "Is Lily in the common room?"
James eyed him. The subject of Lily Evans was somewhat strained between them. Since the start of the 5th year, when Lily and Remus had been made prefects (not that he was upset about that), they'd been spending a large amount of time together, forming a rather close friendship which made James feel threatened. He had not, however, voiced this and inevitably drove himself mad with the idea of Remus and Lily having a secret love affair in the lost and forgotten parts of the library.
"Oh, yeah, she's in there, studying as usual." He said with a roll of his eyes and a small uneasy chuckle to which Remus merely smiled and brushed past him. "Right well, I'll see you at dinner… then…"
James glanced behind him, watching Remus' tweedy blazer disappear out of sight through the portrait. He heaved a sigh, aware that Remus was probably still uneasy about what had happened at the womping willow a few weeks previous. Sirius had been punished, and quite severely. He'd been removed from the Quidditch team and given detention until the end of term, not to mention that 50 points had been taken from Gryffindor. It was a low blow for him and he had suffered his brother's triumphant sneering along with a lot of heat from fellow Gryffindors for losing so many points. James felt quite in the middle of it all. He had gotten away with 10 points taken and a warning from Dumbledore about avoiding future 'mishaps' (which probably meant 'kafuffles with Snape').
Remus had quietly avoided Sirius; James noticed that Remus was going to the library more often, coming back late when everyone had gone to bed and slipping out early in the morning. Sirius had pretended to not see these subtle changes and continued to wrap himself up in his bad mood. James had seen Sirius angry; he had frequently turned up at his house during the holidays blind with rage at his parents or brother. Oh, he knew the temper of the Black family alright. Unfortunately, there wasn't really any getting through to Sirius when he was like this. James had to just let him get on with it, but after this amount of time it was starting to wear on him. Sirius was unpleasant, even to him and he had snapped at Peter the other day for no good reason. Perhaps it was time for an intervention? James thought on this as he headed out of the castle into the bright sunshine of the courtyard.
~ * ~
Sirius was lying on his back on the grassy slope that descended down towards Hagrid's hut and the forest. The sun was high and hot but there was a definite breeze that glided briskly through the long blades of grass. His ankles were crossed and his hands lay behind his head. He might've been asleep but that didn't stop the plump boy beside him from continuing to talk in nervous sentences, tugging idly at the grass by his side.
"…So, as it turned out, there wasn't really anything wrong with the sandwich after all."
Sirius, who was awake, opened an eye, squinting a little in sunlight and glanced at Peter, rather disinterested.
"So you decided to scoff it, did you?"
Pete gave an unsure sort of nod, shifting a little. Sirius breathed a sigh in response and closed his eye again lazily.
"Of course you did."
Peter wasn't the brightest bulb in the box but he did know when he was being talked down to. He frowned and opened his mouth to say something. He thought better of it however as he raised his eyes to meet James' lanky figure heading towards them from the bridge.
"Oh look, it's Prongs!" He said, a little too over-enthusiastically. He lifted a hand and waved at him.
Sirius remained in his relaxed position until James loomed over him. His shadow was casting over Sirius' face, allowing him to open his eyes without being blinded.
"You're blocking my sun, y'know."
"Oh, I'm sorry; I didn't see you being a lazy lout on the grass there." He plonked down beside him. He rested his hands against his knees and looked out across the landscape, something that never failed to mesmerise him. He felt Sirius stir and sit up beside him, huffing a little.
"I was just trying to have a nap, actually, until Pete here decided to retell stories of potentially poisonous food that he's eaten over the years." Both Sirius and James looked round at Peter who was looking both offended and caught out.
"Well, at least he's still alive and kicking! Stomach of steel, that's our Pete!" James chuckled, flashing a grin at the boy. It was returned, happily. Peter admired James greatly for his ability to make him feel at ease. Even around grumpy Sirius.
"Didn't you say you were going to study or something?" Sirius inquired, giving him a sly look.
James replied with a casual shrug, glancing back at him. "Yeah, I got bored."
"I tried to study for Transfiguration last night and ended up turning my quill into a feathery bit of cheese." Said Pete miserably.
"Did you eat that too?" Sirius asked, glancing at him with a smirk.
Pete made a small, choked noise and shifted again, his face going red. James rolled his eyes.
"Just ignore him, Pete. He's got his knickers in a twist."
"Who says I'm wearing undergarments at all?"
"Delightful image I'm getting there." James stated, giving him a dubious look; he wouldn't put it past Sirius to not wear underwear.
Peter chuckled self-consciously and Sirius flopped back on the grass, replacing his hands behind his head. James stayed staring out across the forest, listening to the chorus of leaves as the trees swayed in the breeze. If anyone was going to talk to Sirius about Remus, it would have to be him, wouldn't it?
"I saw Remus a minute ago." He started, quietly. When Sirius did not reply, he turned to look at him. "Sirius?"
"Yes, I heard you. So?"
"Don't you think things have been a bit tense since the incident?"
"I guess." Sirius replied with a shrug.
"You guess? Remus has pretty much avoided any of us for two weeks!"
Another careless shrug.
James huffed, exasperated with Sirius' display stubbornness.
"Sirius, I'm trying to talk about our best friend, who you betrayed-." Sirius opened his mouth to protest. "- whether you meant to or not."
Sirius was annoyed and he sat up again quickly, turning on James. "And I told him that I was sorry! What more does he want? I can't do anything about it now, can I?"
"No, but you could maybe stop acting like a complete arse about it."
"Well maybe you could mind your own business, eh?"
James looked at him, slightly perplexed at his comeback. "Really mature, Sirius." He said after a moment. He really didn't want to have a fight about this.
"Oh what? You take the moral high ground in one situation and suddenly you're all grown up and telling other people what to do?"
James sighed, turning to look back across the peaceful landscape rather than the furious face of his friend. He was being defensive, and he knew well enough that Sirius was only so defensive when he was feeling guilty. After a moment, Sirius got up and turned briskly up the slope, heading back towards the castle and leaving an uncomfortable space between James and Peter.
~ * ~
That evening, Lily sat beside the open window with her Charms book open in her lap. It was stuffy in the common room and she found that sitting by the window, practically falling out of it, made her a lot cooler than her usual spot in the far corner. Remus was next to her, taking up one of the armchairs, his legs stretched out in front of him and his feet crossed. They were silent, but perfectly contented in each other's company. Lily brought a hand up to brush through her hair, taking a break from her page to look out onto the sunset. The sky streamed pinks and oranges that blended together against the dulling blue of the dying day. She made a point of marking this view in her memory, a mental collection of Hogwarts locked away for the future. Remus shifted in his seat and glanced up at her with a small smile.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
"Hm?" She glanced down at him and smiled. "Oh, no, I was just enjoying the view."
Remus closed the book between his fingers and got out of the chair to stand by her side. He took in the view with a hint of a smile; this being one of the few times that he allowed himself to be abstract, to just savour what was in front of him. He didn't have to think about the severe inconvenience of being a werewolf and a danger to everyone around him.
As he looked on, he became aware of a hand on his own and his eyes averted from the sunset to Lily, who was looking back at him with a small, concerned frown.
"Remus, I do worry about you." She said quietly.
"What for, Lils? ... Yeah, I suppose I turn into this hideous beast once a month and I get a bit grumpy with the moon cycle, but it's nothing I can't handle."
Lily was not won over by this and shifted herself on the window seat to face him more directly. "I know you've got a lot going on at the moment, but you don't have to feel like you're alone because you're not."
"I know that, but you've got bigger things to worry about, right? Like that charms test tomorrow, Flitwick warned that there might be a trick question."
"Remus…"
"What? I'm practically terrified." He said dryly, with a hint of a smirk.
"Be serious!"
"I can't, I'm Remus. Sirius is Sirius." He was grinning now.
"Like I haven't heard that before!" She fought back a laugh unsuccessfully and whacked him on the arm.
Remus set down his book on the empty chair and turned back to her with a smile. "Jokes aside Lil, I really do appreciate your company and your friendship. 'Means a lot."
Lily shifted to kneel on the window seat and leant up to hug him. Remus was caught off guard for a moment; he certainly wasn't against the notion but was surprised that anyone wanted hug him. He soon returned the motion and wrapped his arms about her.
James clambered back through the portrait hole in the middle of this moment; he shifted awkwardly on the spot. He'd been totally thrown by Sirius' behaviour, although he didn't know what he had expected, he was the former Black Prince. (Sirius had labelled himself this once as a joke, but James could now see that it had an underlying point.) Pete had been rather uncomfortable about the whole affair and James had had to spend awhile convincing him that he hadn't done anything wrong and it was just Sirius being a moody brat. He had returned to the common room alone, hoping to find Lily studying again; she always lifted his moods with her constant rejections. However, this was a little too much. He looked on as Remus and Lily shared such a tender moment right in front of him. He'd never seen Remus hug anyone. Equally, he'd never seen Lily throwing herself at anyone and he always envisioned it would be him rather than his bookish best friend.
They eventually pulled away from each other, but James had seen enough and was already halfway out of the portrait hole before he did something stupid or embarrassing. This did not however stop him from grumbling irritably to himself as he sulked down the stairs to the Great Hall for dinner.
~ * ~
The following morning, Remus was already up and had eaten his small breakfast. He was just finishing his last slurp of tea when Sirius and James plonked down opposite him at the table. Remus gave them an upward glance from his book; neither one looking particularly happy. Sirius was attacking a piece of toast with an onslaught of butter whilst James sulkily slurped his pumpkin juice and avoided eye contact. It had been awhile since he had seen them both in a bad mood although he assumed it would happen again at some point. There seemed to be a cloud of tension hanging over them since the incident and Remus knew that he was to blame. It was his fault that they had all gotten into this. If Sirius and James had just left him alone, he would've had a quiet, friendless life at Hogwarts and that would've been better than this. Or so he supposed, with some dim hope of being wrong. Shutting his book, he decided to go up to Charms early. As he rose from the bench, Sirius snapped his eyes to him almost predatorily.
"Where are you going?"
"I was… going to head to Charms." He faltered a little; both Sirius and James were now looking at him.
"But it doesn't start for another twenty minutes." Sirius pointed out. "Why don't you sit down and have another cup of tea?"
Remus glanced at James, who for the briefest of moments shot a glare at Sirius.
"No, I'd rather go up and read over my notes from the last lesson." He shifted uncomfortably before turning and abruptly walking away.
"Well, fine!" Sirius yelled after him, rising a little off the bench. "Do let us know when you've stopped sulking!" He sunk down again, stabbing his bacon savagely and tearing into it with his teeth.
"Nicely handled" James quietly commented, now taking his turn at buttering his toast.
Sirius threw him a scowl, "Well you bloody try and talk to him then!"
They were interrupted for a moment by the arrival of Peter, who was panting a little as he clambered onto the bench and gazed greedily at the breakfast selection. He gave James and Sirius a second glance, helping himself to a few sausages.
"What's going on?"
"Sirius made Remus run away."
"I did not! He ran on his own accord." Protested Sirius, his mouth full.
James was part way though rolling his eyes, when he spotted Lily heading down between the tables to her group of friends who were sat part way down the table from them. She didn't even look up at him as she slid down between two of her mates and partially out of sight. He deflated into a sigh and picked at his toast.
"S'up with you?" asked Sirius, chewing on a sausage, giving James a brief glance.
"Nothing." He replied, sulkily.
By the end of breakfast, James, Sirius and Peter were still slumped at the table. James had watched Lily have breakfast and get up and leave for the first lesson with her friends. It was depressing; she spared him not even a glance. He was sure that she had seen him over Remus' shoulder whilst she was… hugging him.
Sirius was so wound up by the morning's events already that the thought of the rest of the day made him want to give up on it all and go back to bed. It was bad enough that he was punishing himself over what had happened, but Remus didn't need to be so openly upset with him. It just made it uncomfortable for everyone else. James was becoming insufferable, going around acting like Mr Mature. So what if Dumbledore saw something noble in his actions, he only did it because he didn't want to get into trouble. Sirius gulped down the rest of his pumpkin juice and stood up, placing the empty goblet on the table.
"Let's get to Charms then." He said, slinging his bag over his shoulder.
Having nothing to object to, James and Peter followed suit and headed to the classroom in the 4th floor.
~ * ~
Remus was sat with Lily.
Of course he was. Why wouldn't he be? They were friends, and prefects of the same House. James quietly panicked as they entered Charms and made their way up to their usual seats. James had spotted Lily the moment he walked in, her red hair was almost radiating in the early sunlight that hazed through the window. He wished he hadn't however as she was sat in the chair beside Remus and they were chatting. To make matters worse, she was smiling. He was grateful to have to look away to see where he was going as he slid into the seat beside Sirius, Pete to his other side. He couldn't look up, it was enough to make him start sporadically twitching and set off some horrendous prank just so that she would look at him.
Sirius frowned, turning his head towards James as Flitwick tottered up onto his usual platform of textbooks. "Will you stop kicking my bloody leg?" He hissed irritably.
James looked at him suddenly, as if he had forgotten he was there. He blinked stupidly. "What? Oh, sorry. Didn't realise your leg was there." He shifted his elongated limbs under the desk.
Sirius muttered something, but James only made out the words 'lanky' and 'bastard' before giving him another sharp kick under the table. Sirius flinched and glared at him.
"Stop being an arse, mate." James said as Flitwick shot a look in their direction and he shifted to sit up a little more. Sirius simply picked up his quill and toyed with the feather sulkily.
Remus, for his part felt uncomfortable for the rest of the lesson. Although he tried to concentrate on the test, he couldn't help his that eyes were drifting across the classroom to Sirius and James who were both frowning at their parchment. This was an absolute mess. He should have gone to sit with them, why did he think he couldn't? Yes, so Sirius had given away his most trusted secret to possibly the worst person. But he was still his friend.
He was just being a horrid sod at the moment though, which naturally made Remus want to spend less time with him because it was harder to forgive him that way. He didn't want to see Sirius pent up with anger because of him. James was acting unusual as well, he wasn't really sure why but he was getting the feeling that James was angry with him. Peter didn't seem to know what was going on, nor did he really care as long as he was with James and Sirius. Remus was glad of Lily. She was a refreshing break from the dense tension that followed him around at the moment. He continued his test without looking up.
As the lesson ended, it became obvious that Sirius was now in a worse mood than he had been at breakfast. He shoved his things into his bag and slung it over his shoulder. James turned to say something to him but he gave him a scowl and moved past the other boy to get out of the classroom without waiting for either him or Peter to follow. Sirius had spent the majority of the lesson opposite Remus. The only place he could look without being obvious was his test, or Remus; neither sat well with him. The test was pointless and Remus kept making shifty eye contact that irritated Sirius more. The brief, meek glances just made the guilt rise up more within him and he was never one to deal with guilt well. He decided to take a detour to Potions and have a quick cigarette around the back of the courtyard. He slipped through the shuffling crowd and out of sight.
Neglected, Peter made a pathetic sound and looked at James for what to do. James was preoccupied being both perplexed and downright annoyed at Sirius. He swung his bag over his shoulder and made his way out of the class room, not bothering to wait for Peter who struggled behind but lost him through the crowd. He hung awkwardly behind everyone else and shuffled out of the classroom last of all.
Part 1 of 3, comments and feedback welcome :]
Summary: The tension is thick after Sirius reveals Remus' secret. James invents a love triangle and Peter has some unpleasant cheese..
He wasn't exactly sure why he'd decided to go for it at that moment, but when Lily had scooped her hair back over her shoulder, revealing that pale, delicate neck, he just couldn't help himself but to lean in and press a kiss gently to her skin.
Lily was a little taken aback by this new move and stiffened immediately. She wanted to be overcome with repulsion or so she told herself, but it was a gentle, nuzzling sort of kiss that made her stomach flutter delightfully. This unnecessary fluttering came as an even greater shock and she immediately lashed her hand across James' face to get him off as though he were some annoying fly.
"Get lost, Potter." She went back to her work.
"Aww, come on Lily, don't be like that." He whined, rubbing his cheek.
"I'll be like 'that' with you until you get it into that obscenely thick head of yours that I'm not interested."
"Don't lie to yourself! Don't deny yourself your hearts desire!" He composed dramatically at her side, flopping his long arms over her work to distract her.
She sighed curtly and put down her quill, she would only grant him this certain amount of attention, as she always did. Just to make him go away.
"You're right, James."
"I am?" He straightened and blinked at her, not quite believing it.
"Yes, I shouldn't deny myself my desires. Would you be a love and fetch me some carrot cake? I don't think I can go on without any."
James' face fell for a moment but he quickly recovered with a sly grin.
"Ohoh, carrot cake, eh? Shall I bring it to you naked? Make it a bit more exciting."
"If you come near me with any less clothing on than you have now, I will curse your eyebrows off again."
"Oh, you tease!"
"Go. Away!"
James knew when to stop, it had taken a few years of practise but by the time summer was drawing near on their 6th year, he had mastered being able to pester Lily just enough that she wouldn't throw a nasty hex at him for it. It seemed to him, as he bounced out of the common room, that she was softening. He was wearing her down and he could only see this as a positive sign. He ducked out of the portrait hole, still on a high from his encounter with The Goddess (a nickname that he tried to circulate several times) when Remus practically ploughed into him on his way in. He looked up, utterly bewildered from his book as James looked at him, his eyebrows raised.
"Remus! Alright?"
"Sorry, James. I'm in a bit of rush." He said, almost at a pant. He was fidgety, distracted. "Is Lily in the common room?"
James eyed him. The subject of Lily Evans was somewhat strained between them. Since the start of the 5th year, when Lily and Remus had been made prefects (not that he was upset about that), they'd been spending a large amount of time together, forming a rather close friendship which made James feel threatened. He had not, however, voiced this and inevitably drove himself mad with the idea of Remus and Lily having a secret love affair in the lost and forgotten parts of the library.
"Oh, yeah, she's in there, studying as usual." He said with a roll of his eyes and a small uneasy chuckle to which Remus merely smiled and brushed past him. "Right well, I'll see you at dinner… then…"
James glanced behind him, watching Remus' tweedy blazer disappear out of sight through the portrait. He heaved a sigh, aware that Remus was probably still uneasy about what had happened at the womping willow a few weeks previous. Sirius had been punished, and quite severely. He'd been removed from the Quidditch team and given detention until the end of term, not to mention that 50 points had been taken from Gryffindor. It was a low blow for him and he had suffered his brother's triumphant sneering along with a lot of heat from fellow Gryffindors for losing so many points. James felt quite in the middle of it all. He had gotten away with 10 points taken and a warning from Dumbledore about avoiding future 'mishaps' (which probably meant 'kafuffles with Snape').
Remus had quietly avoided Sirius; James noticed that Remus was going to the library more often, coming back late when everyone had gone to bed and slipping out early in the morning. Sirius had pretended to not see these subtle changes and continued to wrap himself up in his bad mood. James had seen Sirius angry; he had frequently turned up at his house during the holidays blind with rage at his parents or brother. Oh, he knew the temper of the Black family alright. Unfortunately, there wasn't really any getting through to Sirius when he was like this. James had to just let him get on with it, but after this amount of time it was starting to wear on him. Sirius was unpleasant, even to him and he had snapped at Peter the other day for no good reason. Perhaps it was time for an intervention? James thought on this as he headed out of the castle into the bright sunshine of the courtyard.
~ * ~
Sirius was lying on his back on the grassy slope that descended down towards Hagrid's hut and the forest. The sun was high and hot but there was a definite breeze that glided briskly through the long blades of grass. His ankles were crossed and his hands lay behind his head. He might've been asleep but that didn't stop the plump boy beside him from continuing to talk in nervous sentences, tugging idly at the grass by his side.
"…So, as it turned out, there wasn't really anything wrong with the sandwich after all."
Sirius, who was awake, opened an eye, squinting a little in sunlight and glanced at Peter, rather disinterested.
"So you decided to scoff it, did you?"
Pete gave an unsure sort of nod, shifting a little. Sirius breathed a sigh in response and closed his eye again lazily.
"Of course you did."
Peter wasn't the brightest bulb in the box but he did know when he was being talked down to. He frowned and opened his mouth to say something. He thought better of it however as he raised his eyes to meet James' lanky figure heading towards them from the bridge.
"Oh look, it's Prongs!" He said, a little too over-enthusiastically. He lifted a hand and waved at him.
Sirius remained in his relaxed position until James loomed over him. His shadow was casting over Sirius' face, allowing him to open his eyes without being blinded.
"You're blocking my sun, y'know."
"Oh, I'm sorry; I didn't see you being a lazy lout on the grass there." He plonked down beside him. He rested his hands against his knees and looked out across the landscape, something that never failed to mesmerise him. He felt Sirius stir and sit up beside him, huffing a little.
"I was just trying to have a nap, actually, until Pete here decided to retell stories of potentially poisonous food that he's eaten over the years." Both Sirius and James looked round at Peter who was looking both offended and caught out.
"Well, at least he's still alive and kicking! Stomach of steel, that's our Pete!" James chuckled, flashing a grin at the boy. It was returned, happily. Peter admired James greatly for his ability to make him feel at ease. Even around grumpy Sirius.
"Didn't you say you were going to study or something?" Sirius inquired, giving him a sly look.
James replied with a casual shrug, glancing back at him. "Yeah, I got bored."
"I tried to study for Transfiguration last night and ended up turning my quill into a feathery bit of cheese." Said Pete miserably.
"Did you eat that too?" Sirius asked, glancing at him with a smirk.
Pete made a small, choked noise and shifted again, his face going red. James rolled his eyes.
"Just ignore him, Pete. He's got his knickers in a twist."
"Who says I'm wearing undergarments at all?"
"Delightful image I'm getting there." James stated, giving him a dubious look; he wouldn't put it past Sirius to not wear underwear.
Peter chuckled self-consciously and Sirius flopped back on the grass, replacing his hands behind his head. James stayed staring out across the forest, listening to the chorus of leaves as the trees swayed in the breeze. If anyone was going to talk to Sirius about Remus, it would have to be him, wouldn't it?
"I saw Remus a minute ago." He started, quietly. When Sirius did not reply, he turned to look at him. "Sirius?"
"Yes, I heard you. So?"
"Don't you think things have been a bit tense since the incident?"
"I guess." Sirius replied with a shrug.
"You guess? Remus has pretty much avoided any of us for two weeks!"
Another careless shrug.
James huffed, exasperated with Sirius' display stubbornness.
"Sirius, I'm trying to talk about our best friend, who you betrayed-." Sirius opened his mouth to protest. "- whether you meant to or not."
Sirius was annoyed and he sat up again quickly, turning on James. "And I told him that I was sorry! What more does he want? I can't do anything about it now, can I?"
"No, but you could maybe stop acting like a complete arse about it."
"Well maybe you could mind your own business, eh?"
James looked at him, slightly perplexed at his comeback. "Really mature, Sirius." He said after a moment. He really didn't want to have a fight about this.
"Oh what? You take the moral high ground in one situation and suddenly you're all grown up and telling other people what to do?"
James sighed, turning to look back across the peaceful landscape rather than the furious face of his friend. He was being defensive, and he knew well enough that Sirius was only so defensive when he was feeling guilty. After a moment, Sirius got up and turned briskly up the slope, heading back towards the castle and leaving an uncomfortable space between James and Peter.
~ * ~
That evening, Lily sat beside the open window with her Charms book open in her lap. It was stuffy in the common room and she found that sitting by the window, practically falling out of it, made her a lot cooler than her usual spot in the far corner. Remus was next to her, taking up one of the armchairs, his legs stretched out in front of him and his feet crossed. They were silent, but perfectly contented in each other's company. Lily brought a hand up to brush through her hair, taking a break from her page to look out onto the sunset. The sky streamed pinks and oranges that blended together against the dulling blue of the dying day. She made a point of marking this view in her memory, a mental collection of Hogwarts locked away for the future. Remus shifted in his seat and glanced up at her with a small smile.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
"Hm?" She glanced down at him and smiled. "Oh, no, I was just enjoying the view."
Remus closed the book between his fingers and got out of the chair to stand by her side. He took in the view with a hint of a smile; this being one of the few times that he allowed himself to be abstract, to just savour what was in front of him. He didn't have to think about the severe inconvenience of being a werewolf and a danger to everyone around him.
As he looked on, he became aware of a hand on his own and his eyes averted from the sunset to Lily, who was looking back at him with a small, concerned frown.
"Remus, I do worry about you." She said quietly.
"What for, Lils? ... Yeah, I suppose I turn into this hideous beast once a month and I get a bit grumpy with the moon cycle, but it's nothing I can't handle."
Lily was not won over by this and shifted herself on the window seat to face him more directly. "I know you've got a lot going on at the moment, but you don't have to feel like you're alone because you're not."
"I know that, but you've got bigger things to worry about, right? Like that charms test tomorrow, Flitwick warned that there might be a trick question."
"Remus…"
"What? I'm practically terrified." He said dryly, with a hint of a smirk.
"Be serious!"
"I can't, I'm Remus. Sirius is Sirius." He was grinning now.
"Like I haven't heard that before!" She fought back a laugh unsuccessfully and whacked him on the arm.
Remus set down his book on the empty chair and turned back to her with a smile. "Jokes aside Lil, I really do appreciate your company and your friendship. 'Means a lot."
Lily shifted to kneel on the window seat and leant up to hug him. Remus was caught off guard for a moment; he certainly wasn't against the notion but was surprised that anyone wanted hug him. He soon returned the motion and wrapped his arms about her.
James clambered back through the portrait hole in the middle of this moment; he shifted awkwardly on the spot. He'd been totally thrown by Sirius' behaviour, although he didn't know what he had expected, he was the former Black Prince. (Sirius had labelled himself this once as a joke, but James could now see that it had an underlying point.) Pete had been rather uncomfortable about the whole affair and James had had to spend awhile convincing him that he hadn't done anything wrong and it was just Sirius being a moody brat. He had returned to the common room alone, hoping to find Lily studying again; she always lifted his moods with her constant rejections. However, this was a little too much. He looked on as Remus and Lily shared such a tender moment right in front of him. He'd never seen Remus hug anyone. Equally, he'd never seen Lily throwing herself at anyone and he always envisioned it would be him rather than his bookish best friend.
They eventually pulled away from each other, but James had seen enough and was already halfway out of the portrait hole before he did something stupid or embarrassing. This did not however stop him from grumbling irritably to himself as he sulked down the stairs to the Great Hall for dinner.
~ * ~
The following morning, Remus was already up and had eaten his small breakfast. He was just finishing his last slurp of tea when Sirius and James plonked down opposite him at the table. Remus gave them an upward glance from his book; neither one looking particularly happy. Sirius was attacking a piece of toast with an onslaught of butter whilst James sulkily slurped his pumpkin juice and avoided eye contact. It had been awhile since he had seen them both in a bad mood although he assumed it would happen again at some point. There seemed to be a cloud of tension hanging over them since the incident and Remus knew that he was to blame. It was his fault that they had all gotten into this. If Sirius and James had just left him alone, he would've had a quiet, friendless life at Hogwarts and that would've been better than this. Or so he supposed, with some dim hope of being wrong. Shutting his book, he decided to go up to Charms early. As he rose from the bench, Sirius snapped his eyes to him almost predatorily.
"Where are you going?"
"I was… going to head to Charms." He faltered a little; both Sirius and James were now looking at him.
"But it doesn't start for another twenty minutes." Sirius pointed out. "Why don't you sit down and have another cup of tea?"
Remus glanced at James, who for the briefest of moments shot a glare at Sirius.
"No, I'd rather go up and read over my notes from the last lesson." He shifted uncomfortably before turning and abruptly walking away.
"Well, fine!" Sirius yelled after him, rising a little off the bench. "Do let us know when you've stopped sulking!" He sunk down again, stabbing his bacon savagely and tearing into it with his teeth.
"Nicely handled" James quietly commented, now taking his turn at buttering his toast.
Sirius threw him a scowl, "Well you bloody try and talk to him then!"
They were interrupted for a moment by the arrival of Peter, who was panting a little as he clambered onto the bench and gazed greedily at the breakfast selection. He gave James and Sirius a second glance, helping himself to a few sausages.
"What's going on?"
"Sirius made Remus run away."
"I did not! He ran on his own accord." Protested Sirius, his mouth full.
James was part way though rolling his eyes, when he spotted Lily heading down between the tables to her group of friends who were sat part way down the table from them. She didn't even look up at him as she slid down between two of her mates and partially out of sight. He deflated into a sigh and picked at his toast.
"S'up with you?" asked Sirius, chewing on a sausage, giving James a brief glance.
"Nothing." He replied, sulkily.
By the end of breakfast, James, Sirius and Peter were still slumped at the table. James had watched Lily have breakfast and get up and leave for the first lesson with her friends. It was depressing; she spared him not even a glance. He was sure that she had seen him over Remus' shoulder whilst she was… hugging him.
Sirius was so wound up by the morning's events already that the thought of the rest of the day made him want to give up on it all and go back to bed. It was bad enough that he was punishing himself over what had happened, but Remus didn't need to be so openly upset with him. It just made it uncomfortable for everyone else. James was becoming insufferable, going around acting like Mr Mature. So what if Dumbledore saw something noble in his actions, he only did it because he didn't want to get into trouble. Sirius gulped down the rest of his pumpkin juice and stood up, placing the empty goblet on the table.
"Let's get to Charms then." He said, slinging his bag over his shoulder.
Having nothing to object to, James and Peter followed suit and headed to the classroom in the 4th floor.
~ * ~
Remus was sat with Lily.
Of course he was. Why wouldn't he be? They were friends, and prefects of the same House. James quietly panicked as they entered Charms and made their way up to their usual seats. James had spotted Lily the moment he walked in, her red hair was almost radiating in the early sunlight that hazed through the window. He wished he hadn't however as she was sat in the chair beside Remus and they were chatting. To make matters worse, she was smiling. He was grateful to have to look away to see where he was going as he slid into the seat beside Sirius, Pete to his other side. He couldn't look up, it was enough to make him start sporadically twitching and set off some horrendous prank just so that she would look at him.
Sirius frowned, turning his head towards James as Flitwick tottered up onto his usual platform of textbooks. "Will you stop kicking my bloody leg?" He hissed irritably.
James looked at him suddenly, as if he had forgotten he was there. He blinked stupidly. "What? Oh, sorry. Didn't realise your leg was there." He shifted his elongated limbs under the desk.
Sirius muttered something, but James only made out the words 'lanky' and 'bastard' before giving him another sharp kick under the table. Sirius flinched and glared at him.
"Stop being an arse, mate." James said as Flitwick shot a look in their direction and he shifted to sit up a little more. Sirius simply picked up his quill and toyed with the feather sulkily.
Remus, for his part felt uncomfortable for the rest of the lesson. Although he tried to concentrate on the test, he couldn't help his that eyes were drifting across the classroom to Sirius and James who were both frowning at their parchment. This was an absolute mess. He should have gone to sit with them, why did he think he couldn't? Yes, so Sirius had given away his most trusted secret to possibly the worst person. But he was still his friend.
He was just being a horrid sod at the moment though, which naturally made Remus want to spend less time with him because it was harder to forgive him that way. He didn't want to see Sirius pent up with anger because of him. James was acting unusual as well, he wasn't really sure why but he was getting the feeling that James was angry with him. Peter didn't seem to know what was going on, nor did he really care as long as he was with James and Sirius. Remus was glad of Lily. She was a refreshing break from the dense tension that followed him around at the moment. He continued his test without looking up.
As the lesson ended, it became obvious that Sirius was now in a worse mood than he had been at breakfast. He shoved his things into his bag and slung it over his shoulder. James turned to say something to him but he gave him a scowl and moved past the other boy to get out of the classroom without waiting for either him or Peter to follow. Sirius had spent the majority of the lesson opposite Remus. The only place he could look without being obvious was his test, or Remus; neither sat well with him. The test was pointless and Remus kept making shifty eye contact that irritated Sirius more. The brief, meek glances just made the guilt rise up more within him and he was never one to deal with guilt well. He decided to take a detour to Potions and have a quick cigarette around the back of the courtyard. He slipped through the shuffling crowd and out of sight.
Neglected, Peter made a pathetic sound and looked at James for what to do. James was preoccupied being both perplexed and downright annoyed at Sirius. He swung his bag over his shoulder and made his way out of the class room, not bothering to wait for Peter who struggled behind but lost him through the crowd. He hung awkwardly behind everyone else and shuffled out of the classroom last of all.
Part 1 of 3, comments and feedback welcome :]