Sifting through old files...
Because nothing wants to be written right now.
So, I wrote this back in August. Which seems like a really, really, reallllllly long time ago, even though it wasn't. In fact, it seems like such a long time ago, that when I clicked the file open, I didn't remember writing it. Then I remembered that it was my brain tripping on the original idea that I had for the Sensory Overload challenge that got nixed because I have the attention span of a poodle on speed.
So...
WIP! Lash me with some wet noodles!
****
Ben knew enough about magic to know that his dream wasn’t a normal run of the mill dream.
Of course, the milk cow pulling his father’s wagon instead of the oxen and the fact that as his dad waved the family goodbye, Ben could see that he was holding his riding whip backwards and he’d opted to wear fancy knee high shiny leather boots that wouldn’t stay that way for more than a league down the dusty dirt road that lead the city was another clue. Back when he’d first started studying magic, he’d learned quickly to put his dreams into two different categories, and this one was promptly breaching both.
Plus, there was the kooky looking blue-green aura that was clinging to the edges and making him wonder if whoever was casting this particular dream spell was going so from under a mystical lagoon or something.
However, since it hadn’t started out with blood and guts, Ben was willing to give the spellcaster a chance to show himself. He didn’t have to wait long either, for shortly after his normal acting, but strangely dressed family left the house for the day as they usually did outside of the dream world, someone faded into appearance at the head of his bed.
He was the strangest boy Ben had ever seen in his life, which given that he’d never been more than a league from his own house, was probably not all that hard a feat to accomplish. The boy was wearing a long, brightly colored robe and there were ruby jewels lining his ears as well as a small jade ring hanging in one nostril. He had shaggy blond hair that fell forward on his face, but that was spiked in back.
His blue eyes twinkled mischievously at Ben, and Ben frowned back in suspicion out of habit. One did not live with seven younger brothers and sisters without being able to recognize that particular patented look of trouble.
Sighing, he shook his head as the strange boy plopped down on Ben’s pillow with a jaunty hop. “Who are you? Why are you invading my dreams?”
“Name’s Cait,” Cait flashed him a toothy grin as a small little brown puppy appeared from nowhere to inspect Ben’s bedcovers. It turned sharply after a quick inspection of the bed to look at Ben and Ben got a better view of the ornately carved Viking helmet that the pug had on its head. The helmet had two white horns protruding from the side, a bit of rabbit fur lined the brim, and a thin strap that somehow managed to keep the bulky hat attached to the little pug’s head as he settled down on Cait’s lap. “I’m the Goblin Prince, and you won’t remember this in the morning.”
Ben snorted. Sure. And he was King Frank’s most trusted wizard as well as best friend. This ‘Goblin Prince’ was definitely living in a dream world.
~*~
Cait scowled at the labyrinth wall in frustration before pulling back a slippered foot and kicking the brick with all his might. Of course, hitting a brick wall with only the flimsiest of silk to protect his feet was not a bright idea and he found himself howling about as loud as Cletus was carrying on for the pain of it all.
His vacation was not going at all the way he’d planned it.
He hadn’t left the Goblin realm since he’d been brought to it as a baby, and after much prodding from his mother, he’d decided it might be fun to meet his foster brother of sorts for the first time in real life. It was supposed to be a simple trip. Snap, get to the real world. Snap, get to the outskirts of the palace. Snap, get to see Truth face to face.
Unfortunately, it had instead been something more along the lines of attempt to snap, find Cletus barking his fool head off out of fear of being left behind. Attempt to snap, find himself sitting in a cold mud puddle and Cletus joyfully spearing him with a horn by accident while chasing a frog. Attempt to snap, find a large impenetrable maze blocking him from reaching his brother.
“There’s not a single blessed way in.”
Biting down hard on his lip to keep from yelping some more, Cait hopped around on one foot to find himself facing a wizard. He looked familiar, but Cait couldn’t place why. He seemed fairly ordinary with slightly mussed brown hair and ordinary brown eyes. In fact, he was just the kind of man who could easily blend into crowds with his nondescript appearance and his drab gray-green clothes. The only reason Cait knew at all that he was a wizard was the slim staff that could have just as easily been a cane, and the small insignia of the order of wizards that was embroidered on one drab sleeve.
“What makes you say that?” He demanded, throwing hands on his hips. Not that he didn’t believe the wizard, because generally their kind was fairly quick about deducing these sorts of things; it was more that he couldn’t stand the thought of spending more time wrestling with the stupid maze that was blocking his way.
“I’ve searched the entire perimeter, looking for a chink somewhere in its armor, and nothing. It’s obviously got some sentient magic to its nature, given that I think the reason it wouldn’t let us in has more to do with our intents than anything else.” The plain wizard tapped the wall with the end of his staff and sparks flew, setting Cletus off in another round of angry barking at the immovable wall.
“Hey, I dunno about you, but my intentions are perfectly pure,” Cait spat back before hitting the wall with a fist. The wall, of course, did not give a bit, and Cait was let to suck on his smashed little finger as it throbbed.
“What an odd thing for the Goblin Prince to say,” the wizard muttered with a small grin tugging at his lips. “Odder still, I actually believe you might mean that.”
“Hey!”
“No offense, of course,” the wizard shrugged off indifferently. “What I meant was that this maze was created with a specific intent and unless you approach it with the right desire, it closes itself to you,” the wizard frowned uncertainly. “Or at least, that best matches what I’ve read in books.”
“So why is the stupid thing here to begin with? I want to get to the palace and it’s in my way,” he informed the wizard in his imperial voice. Given the way the wizard did nothing but arch an eyebrow in response, Cait figured it hadn’t been his best attempt at displaying his royal skills. “Can’t you get rid of it or something? You’re a wizard, right? So fix it, Mr. Wizard.”
“Ben,” the wizard corrected absently as Cletus sniffed at his plain robes. “I think it’s a fairytale spell gone awry. Which means that there is no breaking it until the strictures of the fairytale are fulfilled.”
This was not what Cait wanted to hear. At all. “How the hell do you know that?”
“Well, I did see a knight walk right through the wall I’d attempted to enter through not less than an hour ago. Since he wasn’t the world’s brightest soul, I’m left thinking that the maze will let in anyone honestly intent on trying to reach the princess that’s mostly likely trapped in the castle.”
“Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia!” Cait snarled loudly as the truth of the situation slowly started to sink in. That brat of a palace wench had done this! Truth had told him the little witch had been experimenting, but he’d laughed it off, thinking this to be another thing she’d eventually tire of after it annoyed enough people.
Well, it had certainly annoyed him. He wanted to see Truth!
“There’s three of them?” Ben asked, blinking in surprise.
“No,” Cait glared at the wall. “One’s bad enough. She’s the princess, I’m sure of it.”
They were both silent for a long while, Cait sliding to the ground to rest his chin in the heels of his hands as he tried to figure out what came next. It had never occurred to him that it would be this hard to get to the palace. Things in the mortal realm had always seemed so much easier. That they weren’t actually was perplexing him.
“So, this princess,” Ben finally sighed after a long while, “is she at least nice? If Prince Frank is going to chase after a bit of fluff, it better at least be a worthy bit of fluff. Fairytale spells usually won’t fabricate completely unless there’s a worthy recipient.”
“Princess Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia? Worthy?” It probably wasn’t the most polite thing he’d ever done in his life, bursting into laughter in Ben’s face at the thought. Still, the idea of her as a worthy recipient? No mortal man could have withstood the urge to giggle in hysteria.
“Look, Prince Frank never would have ventured into that maze without a damned good reason. He’s very down to earth. And he most certainly would not fall for some little spoiled bit of fluff,” Ben huffed, actually looking indignant.
“Well, whatever,” Cait shrugged. “If he think she’s some great prize, he’s welcome to her.”
“I bet Basil had something to do with this.”
“Basil?”
“His worthless spoiled squire, my little brother. I should have never recommended the brat to the post. Gave him airs and then suddenly he was just better than the rest of us.” Ben scowled, but Cait could see the hurt behind it. And never having had any other brothers or sisters other than Truth, he was a bit intrigued by it.
They lapsed back into silence, and traitorous mutt that he was, Cletus chose to curl up on Ben’s lap instead of Cait’s. It was a bit strange though, considering Cletus really didn’t warm up to many people. Granted, he only ever saw them in dreams, so maybe that was part of it.
Still, the sun was sitting low in the sky and while Cletus was a dog, he wasn’t exactly guard dog material. Cait had no desire to sleep outside. In fact, the idea of it terrified him. He’d snap himself back to his own room and play in the world through other people’s dreams, but he rather suspected his mother had already blocked the portal between worlds, leaving him stranded in this one.
He knew he needed a vacation, but he thought she was being a bit extreme.
“Isn’t there another way in?” Cait finally broke the silence plaintively, looking at the wizard, who for all intents and purposes looked asleep.
“No, not that I’ve been able to find,” Ben snapped almost irritably. “I was trying to scry to see if I could find anything out, but you just broke my concentration.”
Well, la dee da. He was the Goblin Prince, not psychic. How was he supposed to know that Ben wasn’t narcoleptic or something? “So what did you find?”
“A shrub told me that they’d reached the Liar’s Riddle early this morning, and that they were actually able to deduce which guard was the Liar. It seemed befuddled that they chose to take the Liar with them on the rest of their journey, but knowing Frank,” Ben shrugged, “he’s a good judge of character.”
“Which is why Basil’s a right good guy, huh?” Cait commented snidely, almost wishing that he hadn’t said anything as Ben’s face fell slightly. But really, a wizard that got his information from shrubs? Did Cait look like a complete simpleton to him?
“No, Frank just has a big heart and he did it as a favor to me.” Heaving a sigh, Ben gently pulled Cletus off his lap and stood. “Well, it was nice to meet you again, Cait, and I wish you the best of luck.”
Again? Cait frowned.
Wait, he was leaving? “Wait, you’re leaving?” Ben couldn’t leave him here alone! The man-eating gophers would devour him in his sleep! The Rip Van Winkle Toadstools would curse him when he ate them by accident. Dammit, he was supposed to be in the palace with Truth right now. He didn’t have the slightest clue how to camp out by himself in the mortal realm.
“Yes. I thought I’d head to the nearest Wizarding library and see what research I can do on these types of spells. I’m not going to accomplish anything waiting here,” he said as if it were obvious.
“Good,” Cait scrambled up, following him. “I’ll come with and help,” he said, not giving Ben the chance to refuse.
~*~
The Goblin Prince had grown a couple of inches, and filled out slightly losing some of his boyish chubbiness, but he was still very much the same strange boy that Ben remembered from the dream that had spurred him to leave home and venture off to wizarding school.
Ben had even become Prince Frank’s most trusted wizard and best friend, so the only conclusion Ben had been able to reach was that Goblin magic was still alive and well in the mortal realm, despite what the great texts had to say on the subject.
Unfortunately, with the exception of being able to use Goblin magic, this particular Goblin Prince seemed to be the Goblin antithesis. There were no disfigured limbs. He had all ten fingers and when they’d stopped at a watering hole, Ben had seen all ten toes. He wasn’t overly sensitive to magic. In fact, Cait had almost been strangely resistant to it, being able to bang at the walls of the maze without receiving even the smallest of shocks that any regular non-magical human might have felt.
“We’re stopping here for the night,” he told Cait wearily, as he plopped down next to an old fire circle that established this as a fairly well worn and often used trail.
“Here?! But we’re in the middle of nowhere!”
Cait, however, seemed to think that they were trekking through the wilds of the completely unknown. There was a bit of braided hair with a bead on the end that swung and hit Cait on the cheek as he whipped his head around too fast at the normal nighttime sounds of the forest.
“We’re fine. Relax. I’ve traveled this trail a million times and not once have I ever been eaten by a carnivorous vole.”
He’d meant it jokingly since Cait had practically ran screaming from the field mouse, the beaver and the half hidden fawn that they’d stumbled across so far in the hour and a half that they’d been on the road. But given the way Cait’s eyes bugged out at the thought, he regretted the jibe.
“Cletus! Come!” Cait hollered loud enough to scare off any nightlife within hearing distance. The helmeted dog in question didn’t seem at all phased by the request and instead went ambling on to the next patch of grass to sniff and determine its worthiness of being a latrine.
“Look, nothing is going to get us, Cait. If it makes you feel better, I’m casting a protection spell right now.” Although, that really had less to do with the possibility of carnivorous voles and more to do with the annoying and semi-threatening presence of Master Antooche. He’d felt the man’s ham-handed presence all damn day. They’d apprenticed together, and they were equals in magical ability, but Antooche wanted more.
Mostly because Antooche was greedy. Ben had meant to bring it to Frank’s attention ages ago, but the matter hadn’t seemed that important or that dire until long after Frank had set out on his quest and Antooche had started snatching kids off the street and forcing them to read the great texts. And since Antooche’s army of reluctant and resentful brats had done nothing but cause chaos in the kingdom, Ben had officially disbanded them. While the kids had been overjoyed by that, Antooche had been less than happy. He’d been causing trouble for Ben from the moment the delinquent apprentices had been sent back to their homes and back to training in occupations that they’d much rather be employed at working.
“A really strong protection spell?” Cait asked suspiciously after Ben had finished setting the parameters and establishing the shield.
“No, a really weak one.” There was just something about Cait that made him want to tease.
“You suck,” Cait returned with an eye roll. “You and Truth would get along just great.”
“Truth?”
“Foster brother,” Cait mumbled pulling off the long and elaborate topcoat he was wearing. Ben was sure that at one point it had been fabulously beautiful and colorful, but the caked mud covering the lower half of it was not a good look for it or for Cait. Although, without the tunic, it was much easier to determine how much the Goblin Prince had grown since Ben had last seen him. Of course, Ben had grown too, but it was more striking on the Goblin Prince. Cait’s shoulders had widened to fit the tight sleeveless top that was tucked into the solid black breeches Cait was wearing.
“Is that who you were venturing after at the labyrinth?”
“Yup. I’m on vacation and I’m supposed to be staying with Truth. Damn Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia anyway. She always picked on Truth something fierce since she’s the oldest and first in line for the throne. Truth pretends that he’s okay with it and that it doesn’t bother him, but I know better,” Cait said darkly. “I’ve tried giving her a nightmare or two, but no luck. I’m just not that good of a dreamspinner.”
A goblin dreamspinner, huh? Well, wasn’t Cait just a walking legend. Ben’s lips quirked up as he thought about it. According to the wizarding elite, Cait was a physical impossibility. The peasantry, of course, had always disagreed, but Ben suspected he was one of the few wizards to have gone the way of the peasants on this.
Of course, the wizarding elite was composed of characters like Antooche, so maybe it was for the best anyway that he not hold their beliefs too close to heart.
“Well, it eases my mind to know that you’re not that good a dreamspinner,” he told Cait in between two huge yawns. “Because I’m off to bed. The library’s a good half day’s walk from here and I’d rather get there before the noon meal,” he mumbled sleepily, settling down on his bedroll.
“Um, Ben, scoot over.”
Cracking an eye, Ben looked over at Cait, whose hair was falling in Ben’s face because Cait was that close and bending over to shake Ben’s shoulder.
“No,” he snapped automatically, rolling over and ignoring the little thump his heart had done at Cait’s pretty face. Weren’t goblins supposed to be ugly? He’d really have to look into rewriting those great texts, or at the least, doing more research.
“Why not?” Cait demanded exasperated. “I don’t have a bedroll, you do. It’s only for a night.”
“No way,” Ben grumbled, pulling his own tunic up over his head in an attempt to block out Cait. In the fifteen years he’d spent as the eldest of seven in a farmer’s hut, he’d always had to share the bed with an assortment of brothers and sisters and their pets. Now that he was an adult in the world, he had no intention of sharing his bed with familiar people, let alone complete strangers.
“Miser,” Cait grouched. “I’m gonna give you nightmares and then we’ll see how you like it.”
“You’re not good at that sort of thing, remember?”
Ben fell asleep with a grin on his face, listening to Cait creatively swear at him and his ancestors.
~*~
Cait bounded towards Truth, pulling them both down to the ground in an enthusiastic hug. “Surprise!”
“Yeah, a total shocker.” Truth smirked slightly and Cain just had to reach out and ruffle his white blond hair affectionately. “You do realize that no one actually uses their shoes to open doors, right?” Truth gestured to the servant standing at the opposite end of the room who was attempting to twist the knob while his hand was stuck inside one of Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia’s ornately beaded ballroom slippers.
“Damn, I thought I had that fixed.” Cait thumped his head down on Truth’s chest, pinning him to the floor. “At least I’ve managed to tone down the Under the Blue Lagoon aura, right?”
“I no longer feel like I’m swimming with the fishes when you’re playing with my dreams, yes,” Truth conceded with a small giggle as Cait tickled his ribs. There was just something about Truth’s occasional sour and snarky comments that made Cait want to tickle him into submission. Because that’s what siblings did, right? It was his god given right to find his brother’s weaknesses and then tease him mercilessly with them.
“Stop it, I mean it,” Truth warned, shoving Cait’s head to the side as he went to tickle. “Gyah! Quit it you evil monster!”
Which of course, in Truth speak, meant tickle harder. Cait obliged. “The tickle monster of DOOM!” He tackled Truth once more as the little twerp tried to squirm away. Poor Truth. They were the same age, but he was destined to be a shrimp for the rest of his life. It was yet another thing that Cait delighted in teasing him for. In fact, he’d even gone so far once as to manipulate Truth’s dream to such a distortion that he’d been as big as Cletus and Cait had towered over him like a giant.
He’d learned then too, not to push Truth too far because his brother wasn’t all that forgiving and hadn’t spoken to him for a couple weeks after that.
“CAIT! Get the hell off me!”
And that was enough fun play time. Rolling off Truth, he grinned, happy with the fact that he’d messed up Truth’s perfectly groomed hair and left him red faced. “What?”
“You’re a real pest,” Truth told him grumpily.
“Yeah, well, you didn’t tell me I was going to find a huge freaking maze blocking my path when I went to try and visit you.” Cait scowled in return.
“Visit?” Truth looked stunned. “You were coming to visit?”
“Well, yeah. And there’s a huge freaking fairytale spell in the way! Why didn’t you say anything?”
“B-b-b-b-b-eca-a-a-ause I-I-I-I c-c-c-c-an-n-n-n’t,” Truth stuttered out brokenly before stopping and gasping for breath. And it suddenly made sense to Cait why he hadn’t said a thing about it.
”You’re a part of the freaking spell?! How the hell did you manage that?” He reached over, smacking Truth upside the head. Honestly, Truth knew better than to get involved in these affairs. Of course he hadn’t said anything directly about it. He couldn’t. That kind of spell held all its victims in thrall until it was broken.
“I’m having lots of fun.” Truth gave an exaggerated smile before lapsing into a sullen frown.
“Well, I’m working with a guy to get you out of it.”
“But you don’t know any mortals past the dream world.”
“Hey, you act like it’s hard or something. It was a piece of cake. He was there, I was there, and I followed him home.”
“Like Cletus,” Truth interjected.
“Like Cletus,” Cait repeated before realizing what he was repeating. “No, not like Cletus. We had conversations.” Cletus had just followed him home from a dream world, tongue lolling out and a goofy pug grin on his goofy pug face. Cletus was an enigma unto himself and really bore no resemblance to Cait whatsoever. “His name is Ben and he’s a wizard. He’s looking for King Frank Somethingorother.”
Truth blinked and Cait was floored by the myriad of expressions that flashed across Truth’s face. “King Frank?”
“So you know him?”
“There’s no way he’s a king. Not in a million years. If he’s a king than I’m queen of troll land,” Truth rolled his eyes.
“I dub thee Sir Truth, Queen of Troll land.”
“And I dub thee Sir Cait of You can Kiss My--”
“Oh look, Hans figured out how to open the door with Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia’s slipper. Very clever of him,” Cait pointed out, distracting Truth.
“Fine. Be that way.” Truth folded his arms over his chest and blew out a sigh. “Why’d you show up anyway, if you weren’t going to believe anything I said?”
“You’re really touchy about that. I showed up because I was worried.” And well, maybe he had wanted some advice on the whole Ben issue. Having never spent time with anyone outside his own family, he was a bit curious as to why he couldn’t stop staring at the stupid wizard.
He wasn’t beautiful. Cait had seen far more beautiful people in dreams. And he wasn’t all that out of the ordinary unless he counted the fact that Ben had done nothing but mutter under his breath and look at Cait as if he were possessed each time he’d even bothered to point out the bloodthirstiness of the average chipmunk.
“You knew I was okay. That was part of the whole Fairy Exchange Program, remember?” Truth reminded him.
“Oh right.” Cait thought for a moment. “I’ve been meaning to ask about that. Does that mean I’m actually physically related to Princess Long Name?”
“More than I am,” Truth agreed with a happy smile. “I’m a changeling in this family. Any screwed up politics are purely their own and yours.”
“Hey, don’t lump me in with them. I’m the Goblin Prince.”
“You’re a changeling Goblin Prince and you’re only there because Princess Pea Brain didn’t have it in her to steal you back from the Goblin King. I think they might have shuffled us off to the Fairy Exchange Program shortly after that to stop an international incident.” Truth looked thoughtful.
“I thought the Exchange Program was a myth.”
“Cait, the majority of the world thinks you’re a myth. Be a bit more open minded,” Truth chided.
~*~
Ben woke up to find Cletus curled up at his back, a horn from his helmet poking Ben’s butt, and Cait curled up against his front, snoring lightly.
This, this was exactly what he’d tried to avoid. Pets and companions that saw him as nothing more than a glorified pillow. In fact, Cait’s arm was flung over his waist and Cait was currently drooling on Ben’s chest.
He was warm though, and he hadn’t once kicked Ben during the night, so that was a plus.
Who was he kidding? Goblin Princes were not the kind of people one contemplated in scenarios like this. Not to mention, Ben had no illusions as to his own allure. He liked Prince Frank specifically because the man placed such little emphasis on appearances or lack thereof.
Prince Frank did not treat him like a filthy peasant, mostly because Frank enjoyed the company of peasants more than the company of his peers. And Prince Frank, while valuing his abilities, did not think Ben could cure everything or save everything or fix everything.
That was all Ben really needed at the end of the day. After so many years of babies crying and changing diapers and fighting for a little peace and quiet to just read a book, he wasn’t ready to go back to a life of loud and rambunctious housemates or companions or lovers. He liked his independence.
Which was why he promptly shoved Cait off him, trying not to grin at Cait’s sleepy and confused face as he landed on the ground with a hard thump.
“Not nice.”
“Rise and shine. I told you not to sleep next to me,” Ben shrugged, shoving Cait farther off the bedroll and ignoring Cletus as he ran barking around the border of his protection spell.
Cait mumbled something into the ground before throwing his topcoat back on. Shrugging his tunic back on, Ben sighed. He’d known something was going on considering he couldn’t scry for Frank and he wasn’t answering the two way crystal that they’d made into a necklace so he wouldn’t lose it this time.
He just hadn’t expected a labyrinth or a fairytale spell.
“So, are we leaving, or do you want to stare at the tree for the rest of the morning?”
“Leaving,” Ben took down the protective shield.
“Oh look, a manticore!” Cait announced in such a cheerful voice that Ben was certain he was joking. Besides, manticores were rare.
“Ha, ha, very funny.” Ben swiveled around to see a large creature standing next to Cait. It had a human head and a lion’s body with a scorpion’s tail. And it gave Ben a positively bloodthirsty grin filled with row upon row of pointy teeth.
~*~
Cait ran behind Ben all the way to the wizarding library. Honestly, he didn’t get the big deal. Everyone knew that all manticores really wanted to do was brag about the last book they’d written. He’d been in enough of their dreams to know how inordinately proud they were once they figured out how to hold a quill in their paws and then form words with it on paper.
Hmmm. Maybe it was a mortal thing? Shrugging, Cait finally trotted to a stop in front of a large building with big stain glass windows. He’d expected it to be a quiet place, but instead it sounded as if a thousand banshees had been let loose.
“Er, do you have a case of killer aardvarks?” Because banshees tended to be more nocturnal.
“No, it’s much worse,” Ben groaned. He hung his head and Cait watched him curiously as he slumped and then pushed one of the monstrous front doors open.
“Benjamin!” A shrill voice called out. “You’re home!” A small pint-sized messy and colorful version of Ben came running through the stacks, disrupting an elderly man with a dozen scrolls and an young woman with a magnifying glass and a huge dusty tome.
“You have kids?”
“No, worse.” Ben looked about ready to face a firing squad. “Siblings.”
“Ben’s home!” The shrill call seemed to be some kind of multiplying spell because before Cait knew it, he was surrounded by munchkins. Some of them looked like Ben, some of them looked like no one Cait had ever seen. In fact, he was certain that one of them had wings.
“Hey guys.” The cacophony grew louder. “Okay, quiet down.” It went down maybe half a decibel. “Okay, shut up!” Dead silence.
“Wow. You’re good,” Cait whispered. All the kids turned to stare at him, fascinated. Cletus, curious now, walked out into the crowd, sniffing from kid to kid. Given the way that the all bent down to surround him, Cait figured that Cletus was quickly on his way to making friends with at least a dozen kids.
“Where’s Dad?”
“Oh, he went out into the field last week. He said he s’pects you to mind the masses.” A little girl with pigtails and a forked tongue informed Ben.
There were a couple of creative swears and the kids watched him with wide, wondrous eyes. “All right. I can handle this.” He looked about three seconds from breaking down. “Okay kids, Cait’s going to entertain you while I do research.”
And then the bastard abandoned him to a dozen rambunctious kids. Lucky for Ben, Cait had spent an entire childhood looking for playmates in other people’s dreams.
~*~
Cait was exhausted. But very, very happy. He didn’t know why Ben had been so upset when they’d returned. These kids were great! And the things that they knew and the games they’d played? Cait loved every second of it.
The only cloud hanging over it was that he’d originally came to the mortal realm to hang out with the brother that he’d grown up with in dreams.
“So, did you find anything out?” He asked, sneaking a look over Ben’s shoulder to look at the books spread out on the long table.
“Gahhh!” Ben jumped about half a foot, bumping Cait’s jaw in the process and helping him bite his lip hard enough to draw blood.
“Owff,” Cait backed up, dabbing at his mouth and coming back with blood covered fingers.
“Oh, I’m sorry, but you scared me half to death,” Ben got up out of his chair and pulled Cait’s head down to his level. The wizard frowned at him before experimentally poking at his lip. Cait held absolutely still, looking at Ben’s eyes as they studied the blood dripping from Cait’s lip. “Looks like it’s mostly bluster. Here, sit down.”
Ben practically shoved him into a chair. Nondescript though he might be, Ben was pretty in his own understated way. Cait noticed that he had a gentle touch as he gingerly pulled at his lip and his palm felt surprisingly nice against Cait’s cheek. “Am I gonna live?” He tried to grin, but winced slightly as the movement pulled at the cut.
“Yeah, here,” Ben reached over and pulled his staff up. He tapped it gently against Cait’s lip.
“Um, was something supposed to happen?” Cait finally asked as Ben stepped back and plopped into the chair next to Cait.
“How do you manage that? I noticed it back at the maze.” Ben looked absolutely perplexed.
“What?”
“Magic. It has little to no effect on you at all. If I’d touched any one of the kids, that cut would have been gone and they would have been complaining of magic tingles. With you? Nothing.”
----------------------------
Well, except you don't get to lash me with wet noodles because I'm turning off comments. I'm a paranoid weirdo. ^_^;; So! Ha! Stealing those ten minutes of your life and there's nothing you can do to stop me! *bounces off to stupidify the world*
Also, I think most of this is the product of having watched Labyrinth six times in a row straight. X_x;;
So, I wrote this back in August. Which seems like a really, really, reallllllly long time ago, even though it wasn't. In fact, it seems like such a long time ago, that when I clicked the file open, I didn't remember writing it. Then I remembered that it was my brain tripping on the original idea that I had for the Sensory Overload challenge that got nixed because I have the attention span of a poodle on speed.
So...
WIP! Lash me with some wet noodles!
****
Ben knew enough about magic to know that his dream wasn’t a normal run of the mill dream.
Of course, the milk cow pulling his father’s wagon instead of the oxen and the fact that as his dad waved the family goodbye, Ben could see that he was holding his riding whip backwards and he’d opted to wear fancy knee high shiny leather boots that wouldn’t stay that way for more than a league down the dusty dirt road that lead the city was another clue. Back when he’d first started studying magic, he’d learned quickly to put his dreams into two different categories, and this one was promptly breaching both.
Plus, there was the kooky looking blue-green aura that was clinging to the edges and making him wonder if whoever was casting this particular dream spell was going so from under a mystical lagoon or something.
However, since it hadn’t started out with blood and guts, Ben was willing to give the spellcaster a chance to show himself. He didn’t have to wait long either, for shortly after his normal acting, but strangely dressed family left the house for the day as they usually did outside of the dream world, someone faded into appearance at the head of his bed.
He was the strangest boy Ben had ever seen in his life, which given that he’d never been more than a league from his own house, was probably not all that hard a feat to accomplish. The boy was wearing a long, brightly colored robe and there were ruby jewels lining his ears as well as a small jade ring hanging in one nostril. He had shaggy blond hair that fell forward on his face, but that was spiked in back.
His blue eyes twinkled mischievously at Ben, and Ben frowned back in suspicion out of habit. One did not live with seven younger brothers and sisters without being able to recognize that particular patented look of trouble.
Sighing, he shook his head as the strange boy plopped down on Ben’s pillow with a jaunty hop. “Who are you? Why are you invading my dreams?”
“Name’s Cait,” Cait flashed him a toothy grin as a small little brown puppy appeared from nowhere to inspect Ben’s bedcovers. It turned sharply after a quick inspection of the bed to look at Ben and Ben got a better view of the ornately carved Viking helmet that the pug had on its head. The helmet had two white horns protruding from the side, a bit of rabbit fur lined the brim, and a thin strap that somehow managed to keep the bulky hat attached to the little pug’s head as he settled down on Cait’s lap. “I’m the Goblin Prince, and you won’t remember this in the morning.”
Ben snorted. Sure. And he was King Frank’s most trusted wizard as well as best friend. This ‘Goblin Prince’ was definitely living in a dream world.
~*~
Cait scowled at the labyrinth wall in frustration before pulling back a slippered foot and kicking the brick with all his might. Of course, hitting a brick wall with only the flimsiest of silk to protect his feet was not a bright idea and he found himself howling about as loud as Cletus was carrying on for the pain of it all.
His vacation was not going at all the way he’d planned it.
He hadn’t left the Goblin realm since he’d been brought to it as a baby, and after much prodding from his mother, he’d decided it might be fun to meet his foster brother of sorts for the first time in real life. It was supposed to be a simple trip. Snap, get to the real world. Snap, get to the outskirts of the palace. Snap, get to see Truth face to face.
Unfortunately, it had instead been something more along the lines of attempt to snap, find Cletus barking his fool head off out of fear of being left behind. Attempt to snap, find himself sitting in a cold mud puddle and Cletus joyfully spearing him with a horn by accident while chasing a frog. Attempt to snap, find a large impenetrable maze blocking him from reaching his brother.
“There’s not a single blessed way in.”
Biting down hard on his lip to keep from yelping some more, Cait hopped around on one foot to find himself facing a wizard. He looked familiar, but Cait couldn’t place why. He seemed fairly ordinary with slightly mussed brown hair and ordinary brown eyes. In fact, he was just the kind of man who could easily blend into crowds with his nondescript appearance and his drab gray-green clothes. The only reason Cait knew at all that he was a wizard was the slim staff that could have just as easily been a cane, and the small insignia of the order of wizards that was embroidered on one drab sleeve.
“What makes you say that?” He demanded, throwing hands on his hips. Not that he didn’t believe the wizard, because generally their kind was fairly quick about deducing these sorts of things; it was more that he couldn’t stand the thought of spending more time wrestling with the stupid maze that was blocking his way.
“I’ve searched the entire perimeter, looking for a chink somewhere in its armor, and nothing. It’s obviously got some sentient magic to its nature, given that I think the reason it wouldn’t let us in has more to do with our intents than anything else.” The plain wizard tapped the wall with the end of his staff and sparks flew, setting Cletus off in another round of angry barking at the immovable wall.
“Hey, I dunno about you, but my intentions are perfectly pure,” Cait spat back before hitting the wall with a fist. The wall, of course, did not give a bit, and Cait was let to suck on his smashed little finger as it throbbed.
“What an odd thing for the Goblin Prince to say,” the wizard muttered with a small grin tugging at his lips. “Odder still, I actually believe you might mean that.”
“Hey!”
“No offense, of course,” the wizard shrugged off indifferently. “What I meant was that this maze was created with a specific intent and unless you approach it with the right desire, it closes itself to you,” the wizard frowned uncertainly. “Or at least, that best matches what I’ve read in books.”
“So why is the stupid thing here to begin with? I want to get to the palace and it’s in my way,” he informed the wizard in his imperial voice. Given the way the wizard did nothing but arch an eyebrow in response, Cait figured it hadn’t been his best attempt at displaying his royal skills. “Can’t you get rid of it or something? You’re a wizard, right? So fix it, Mr. Wizard.”
“Ben,” the wizard corrected absently as Cletus sniffed at his plain robes. “I think it’s a fairytale spell gone awry. Which means that there is no breaking it until the strictures of the fairytale are fulfilled.”
This was not what Cait wanted to hear. At all. “How the hell do you know that?”
“Well, I did see a knight walk right through the wall I’d attempted to enter through not less than an hour ago. Since he wasn’t the world’s brightest soul, I’m left thinking that the maze will let in anyone honestly intent on trying to reach the princess that’s mostly likely trapped in the castle.”
“Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia!” Cait snarled loudly as the truth of the situation slowly started to sink in. That brat of a palace wench had done this! Truth had told him the little witch had been experimenting, but he’d laughed it off, thinking this to be another thing she’d eventually tire of after it annoyed enough people.
Well, it had certainly annoyed him. He wanted to see Truth!
“There’s three of them?” Ben asked, blinking in surprise.
“No,” Cait glared at the wall. “One’s bad enough. She’s the princess, I’m sure of it.”
They were both silent for a long while, Cait sliding to the ground to rest his chin in the heels of his hands as he tried to figure out what came next. It had never occurred to him that it would be this hard to get to the palace. Things in the mortal realm had always seemed so much easier. That they weren’t actually was perplexing him.
“So, this princess,” Ben finally sighed after a long while, “is she at least nice? If Prince Frank is going to chase after a bit of fluff, it better at least be a worthy bit of fluff. Fairytale spells usually won’t fabricate completely unless there’s a worthy recipient.”
“Princess Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia? Worthy?” It probably wasn’t the most polite thing he’d ever done in his life, bursting into laughter in Ben’s face at the thought. Still, the idea of her as a worthy recipient? No mortal man could have withstood the urge to giggle in hysteria.
“Look, Prince Frank never would have ventured into that maze without a damned good reason. He’s very down to earth. And he most certainly would not fall for some little spoiled bit of fluff,” Ben huffed, actually looking indignant.
“Well, whatever,” Cait shrugged. “If he think she’s some great prize, he’s welcome to her.”
“I bet Basil had something to do with this.”
“Basil?”
“His worthless spoiled squire, my little brother. I should have never recommended the brat to the post. Gave him airs and then suddenly he was just better than the rest of us.” Ben scowled, but Cait could see the hurt behind it. And never having had any other brothers or sisters other than Truth, he was a bit intrigued by it.
They lapsed back into silence, and traitorous mutt that he was, Cletus chose to curl up on Ben’s lap instead of Cait’s. It was a bit strange though, considering Cletus really didn’t warm up to many people. Granted, he only ever saw them in dreams, so maybe that was part of it.
Still, the sun was sitting low in the sky and while Cletus was a dog, he wasn’t exactly guard dog material. Cait had no desire to sleep outside. In fact, the idea of it terrified him. He’d snap himself back to his own room and play in the world through other people’s dreams, but he rather suspected his mother had already blocked the portal between worlds, leaving him stranded in this one.
He knew he needed a vacation, but he thought she was being a bit extreme.
“Isn’t there another way in?” Cait finally broke the silence plaintively, looking at the wizard, who for all intents and purposes looked asleep.
“No, not that I’ve been able to find,” Ben snapped almost irritably. “I was trying to scry to see if I could find anything out, but you just broke my concentration.”
Well, la dee da. He was the Goblin Prince, not psychic. How was he supposed to know that Ben wasn’t narcoleptic or something? “So what did you find?”
“A shrub told me that they’d reached the Liar’s Riddle early this morning, and that they were actually able to deduce which guard was the Liar. It seemed befuddled that they chose to take the Liar with them on the rest of their journey, but knowing Frank,” Ben shrugged, “he’s a good judge of character.”
“Which is why Basil’s a right good guy, huh?” Cait commented snidely, almost wishing that he hadn’t said anything as Ben’s face fell slightly. But really, a wizard that got his information from shrubs? Did Cait look like a complete simpleton to him?
“No, Frank just has a big heart and he did it as a favor to me.” Heaving a sigh, Ben gently pulled Cletus off his lap and stood. “Well, it was nice to meet you again, Cait, and I wish you the best of luck.”
Again? Cait frowned.
Wait, he was leaving? “Wait, you’re leaving?” Ben couldn’t leave him here alone! The man-eating gophers would devour him in his sleep! The Rip Van Winkle Toadstools would curse him when he ate them by accident. Dammit, he was supposed to be in the palace with Truth right now. He didn’t have the slightest clue how to camp out by himself in the mortal realm.
“Yes. I thought I’d head to the nearest Wizarding library and see what research I can do on these types of spells. I’m not going to accomplish anything waiting here,” he said as if it were obvious.
“Good,” Cait scrambled up, following him. “I’ll come with and help,” he said, not giving Ben the chance to refuse.
~*~
The Goblin Prince had grown a couple of inches, and filled out slightly losing some of his boyish chubbiness, but he was still very much the same strange boy that Ben remembered from the dream that had spurred him to leave home and venture off to wizarding school.
Ben had even become Prince Frank’s most trusted wizard and best friend, so the only conclusion Ben had been able to reach was that Goblin magic was still alive and well in the mortal realm, despite what the great texts had to say on the subject.
Unfortunately, with the exception of being able to use Goblin magic, this particular Goblin Prince seemed to be the Goblin antithesis. There were no disfigured limbs. He had all ten fingers and when they’d stopped at a watering hole, Ben had seen all ten toes. He wasn’t overly sensitive to magic. In fact, Cait had almost been strangely resistant to it, being able to bang at the walls of the maze without receiving even the smallest of shocks that any regular non-magical human might have felt.
“We’re stopping here for the night,” he told Cait wearily, as he plopped down next to an old fire circle that established this as a fairly well worn and often used trail.
“Here?! But we’re in the middle of nowhere!”
Cait, however, seemed to think that they were trekking through the wilds of the completely unknown. There was a bit of braided hair with a bead on the end that swung and hit Cait on the cheek as he whipped his head around too fast at the normal nighttime sounds of the forest.
“We’re fine. Relax. I’ve traveled this trail a million times and not once have I ever been eaten by a carnivorous vole.”
He’d meant it jokingly since Cait had practically ran screaming from the field mouse, the beaver and the half hidden fawn that they’d stumbled across so far in the hour and a half that they’d been on the road. But given the way Cait’s eyes bugged out at the thought, he regretted the jibe.
“Cletus! Come!” Cait hollered loud enough to scare off any nightlife within hearing distance. The helmeted dog in question didn’t seem at all phased by the request and instead went ambling on to the next patch of grass to sniff and determine its worthiness of being a latrine.
“Look, nothing is going to get us, Cait. If it makes you feel better, I’m casting a protection spell right now.” Although, that really had less to do with the possibility of carnivorous voles and more to do with the annoying and semi-threatening presence of Master Antooche. He’d felt the man’s ham-handed presence all damn day. They’d apprenticed together, and they were equals in magical ability, but Antooche wanted more.
Mostly because Antooche was greedy. Ben had meant to bring it to Frank’s attention ages ago, but the matter hadn’t seemed that important or that dire until long after Frank had set out on his quest and Antooche had started snatching kids off the street and forcing them to read the great texts. And since Antooche’s army of reluctant and resentful brats had done nothing but cause chaos in the kingdom, Ben had officially disbanded them. While the kids had been overjoyed by that, Antooche had been less than happy. He’d been causing trouble for Ben from the moment the delinquent apprentices had been sent back to their homes and back to training in occupations that they’d much rather be employed at working.
“A really strong protection spell?” Cait asked suspiciously after Ben had finished setting the parameters and establishing the shield.
“No, a really weak one.” There was just something about Cait that made him want to tease.
“You suck,” Cait returned with an eye roll. “You and Truth would get along just great.”
“Truth?”
“Foster brother,” Cait mumbled pulling off the long and elaborate topcoat he was wearing. Ben was sure that at one point it had been fabulously beautiful and colorful, but the caked mud covering the lower half of it was not a good look for it or for Cait. Although, without the tunic, it was much easier to determine how much the Goblin Prince had grown since Ben had last seen him. Of course, Ben had grown too, but it was more striking on the Goblin Prince. Cait’s shoulders had widened to fit the tight sleeveless top that was tucked into the solid black breeches Cait was wearing.
“Is that who you were venturing after at the labyrinth?”
“Yup. I’m on vacation and I’m supposed to be staying with Truth. Damn Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia anyway. She always picked on Truth something fierce since she’s the oldest and first in line for the throne. Truth pretends that he’s okay with it and that it doesn’t bother him, but I know better,” Cait said darkly. “I’ve tried giving her a nightmare or two, but no luck. I’m just not that good of a dreamspinner.”
A goblin dreamspinner, huh? Well, wasn’t Cait just a walking legend. Ben’s lips quirked up as he thought about it. According to the wizarding elite, Cait was a physical impossibility. The peasantry, of course, had always disagreed, but Ben suspected he was one of the few wizards to have gone the way of the peasants on this.
Of course, the wizarding elite was composed of characters like Antooche, so maybe it was for the best anyway that he not hold their beliefs too close to heart.
“Well, it eases my mind to know that you’re not that good a dreamspinner,” he told Cait in between two huge yawns. “Because I’m off to bed. The library’s a good half day’s walk from here and I’d rather get there before the noon meal,” he mumbled sleepily, settling down on his bedroll.
“Um, Ben, scoot over.”
Cracking an eye, Ben looked over at Cait, whose hair was falling in Ben’s face because Cait was that close and bending over to shake Ben’s shoulder.
“No,” he snapped automatically, rolling over and ignoring the little thump his heart had done at Cait’s pretty face. Weren’t goblins supposed to be ugly? He’d really have to look into rewriting those great texts, or at the least, doing more research.
“Why not?” Cait demanded exasperated. “I don’t have a bedroll, you do. It’s only for a night.”
“No way,” Ben grumbled, pulling his own tunic up over his head in an attempt to block out Cait. In the fifteen years he’d spent as the eldest of seven in a farmer’s hut, he’d always had to share the bed with an assortment of brothers and sisters and their pets. Now that he was an adult in the world, he had no intention of sharing his bed with familiar people, let alone complete strangers.
“Miser,” Cait grouched. “I’m gonna give you nightmares and then we’ll see how you like it.”
“You’re not good at that sort of thing, remember?”
Ben fell asleep with a grin on his face, listening to Cait creatively swear at him and his ancestors.
~*~
Cait bounded towards Truth, pulling them both down to the ground in an enthusiastic hug. “Surprise!”
“Yeah, a total shocker.” Truth smirked slightly and Cain just had to reach out and ruffle his white blond hair affectionately. “You do realize that no one actually uses their shoes to open doors, right?” Truth gestured to the servant standing at the opposite end of the room who was attempting to twist the knob while his hand was stuck inside one of Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia’s ornately beaded ballroom slippers.
“Damn, I thought I had that fixed.” Cait thumped his head down on Truth’s chest, pinning him to the floor. “At least I’ve managed to tone down the Under the Blue Lagoon aura, right?”
“I no longer feel like I’m swimming with the fishes when you’re playing with my dreams, yes,” Truth conceded with a small giggle as Cait tickled his ribs. There was just something about Truth’s occasional sour and snarky comments that made Cait want to tickle him into submission. Because that’s what siblings did, right? It was his god given right to find his brother’s weaknesses and then tease him mercilessly with them.
“Stop it, I mean it,” Truth warned, shoving Cait’s head to the side as he went to tickle. “Gyah! Quit it you evil monster!”
Which of course, in Truth speak, meant tickle harder. Cait obliged. “The tickle monster of DOOM!” He tackled Truth once more as the little twerp tried to squirm away. Poor Truth. They were the same age, but he was destined to be a shrimp for the rest of his life. It was yet another thing that Cait delighted in teasing him for. In fact, he’d even gone so far once as to manipulate Truth’s dream to such a distortion that he’d been as big as Cletus and Cait had towered over him like a giant.
He’d learned then too, not to push Truth too far because his brother wasn’t all that forgiving and hadn’t spoken to him for a couple weeks after that.
“CAIT! Get the hell off me!”
And that was enough fun play time. Rolling off Truth, he grinned, happy with the fact that he’d messed up Truth’s perfectly groomed hair and left him red faced. “What?”
“You’re a real pest,” Truth told him grumpily.
“Yeah, well, you didn’t tell me I was going to find a huge freaking maze blocking my path when I went to try and visit you.” Cait scowled in return.
“Visit?” Truth looked stunned. “You were coming to visit?”
“Well, yeah. And there’s a huge freaking fairytale spell in the way! Why didn’t you say anything?”
“B-b-b-b-b-eca-a-a-ause I-I-I-I c-c-c-c-an-n-n-n’t,” Truth stuttered out brokenly before stopping and gasping for breath. And it suddenly made sense to Cait why he hadn’t said a thing about it.
”You’re a part of the freaking spell?! How the hell did you manage that?” He reached over, smacking Truth upside the head. Honestly, Truth knew better than to get involved in these affairs. Of course he hadn’t said anything directly about it. He couldn’t. That kind of spell held all its victims in thrall until it was broken.
“I’m having lots of fun.” Truth gave an exaggerated smile before lapsing into a sullen frown.
“Well, I’m working with a guy to get you out of it.”
“But you don’t know any mortals past the dream world.”
“Hey, you act like it’s hard or something. It was a piece of cake. He was there, I was there, and I followed him home.”
“Like Cletus,” Truth interjected.
“Like Cletus,” Cait repeated before realizing what he was repeating. “No, not like Cletus. We had conversations.” Cletus had just followed him home from a dream world, tongue lolling out and a goofy pug grin on his goofy pug face. Cletus was an enigma unto himself and really bore no resemblance to Cait whatsoever. “His name is Ben and he’s a wizard. He’s looking for King Frank Somethingorother.”
Truth blinked and Cait was floored by the myriad of expressions that flashed across Truth’s face. “King Frank?”
“So you know him?”
“There’s no way he’s a king. Not in a million years. If he’s a king than I’m queen of troll land,” Truth rolled his eyes.
“I dub thee Sir Truth, Queen of Troll land.”
“And I dub thee Sir Cait of You can Kiss My--”
“Oh look, Hans figured out how to open the door with Tiffany Belladonna Ambrosia’s slipper. Very clever of him,” Cait pointed out, distracting Truth.
“Fine. Be that way.” Truth folded his arms over his chest and blew out a sigh. “Why’d you show up anyway, if you weren’t going to believe anything I said?”
“You’re really touchy about that. I showed up because I was worried.” And well, maybe he had wanted some advice on the whole Ben issue. Having never spent time with anyone outside his own family, he was a bit curious as to why he couldn’t stop staring at the stupid wizard.
He wasn’t beautiful. Cait had seen far more beautiful people in dreams. And he wasn’t all that out of the ordinary unless he counted the fact that Ben had done nothing but mutter under his breath and look at Cait as if he were possessed each time he’d even bothered to point out the bloodthirstiness of the average chipmunk.
“You knew I was okay. That was part of the whole Fairy Exchange Program, remember?” Truth reminded him.
“Oh right.” Cait thought for a moment. “I’ve been meaning to ask about that. Does that mean I’m actually physically related to Princess Long Name?”
“More than I am,” Truth agreed with a happy smile. “I’m a changeling in this family. Any screwed up politics are purely their own and yours.”
“Hey, don’t lump me in with them. I’m the Goblin Prince.”
“You’re a changeling Goblin Prince and you’re only there because Princess Pea Brain didn’t have it in her to steal you back from the Goblin King. I think they might have shuffled us off to the Fairy Exchange Program shortly after that to stop an international incident.” Truth looked thoughtful.
“I thought the Exchange Program was a myth.”
“Cait, the majority of the world thinks you’re a myth. Be a bit more open minded,” Truth chided.
~*~
Ben woke up to find Cletus curled up at his back, a horn from his helmet poking Ben’s butt, and Cait curled up against his front, snoring lightly.
This, this was exactly what he’d tried to avoid. Pets and companions that saw him as nothing more than a glorified pillow. In fact, Cait’s arm was flung over his waist and Cait was currently drooling on Ben’s chest.
He was warm though, and he hadn’t once kicked Ben during the night, so that was a plus.
Who was he kidding? Goblin Princes were not the kind of people one contemplated in scenarios like this. Not to mention, Ben had no illusions as to his own allure. He liked Prince Frank specifically because the man placed such little emphasis on appearances or lack thereof.
Prince Frank did not treat him like a filthy peasant, mostly because Frank enjoyed the company of peasants more than the company of his peers. And Prince Frank, while valuing his abilities, did not think Ben could cure everything or save everything or fix everything.
That was all Ben really needed at the end of the day. After so many years of babies crying and changing diapers and fighting for a little peace and quiet to just read a book, he wasn’t ready to go back to a life of loud and rambunctious housemates or companions or lovers. He liked his independence.
Which was why he promptly shoved Cait off him, trying not to grin at Cait’s sleepy and confused face as he landed on the ground with a hard thump.
“Not nice.”
“Rise and shine. I told you not to sleep next to me,” Ben shrugged, shoving Cait farther off the bedroll and ignoring Cletus as he ran barking around the border of his protection spell.
Cait mumbled something into the ground before throwing his topcoat back on. Shrugging his tunic back on, Ben sighed. He’d known something was going on considering he couldn’t scry for Frank and he wasn’t answering the two way crystal that they’d made into a necklace so he wouldn’t lose it this time.
He just hadn’t expected a labyrinth or a fairytale spell.
“So, are we leaving, or do you want to stare at the tree for the rest of the morning?”
“Leaving,” Ben took down the protective shield.
“Oh look, a manticore!” Cait announced in such a cheerful voice that Ben was certain he was joking. Besides, manticores were rare.
“Ha, ha, very funny.” Ben swiveled around to see a large creature standing next to Cait. It had a human head and a lion’s body with a scorpion’s tail. And it gave Ben a positively bloodthirsty grin filled with row upon row of pointy teeth.
~*~
Cait ran behind Ben all the way to the wizarding library. Honestly, he didn’t get the big deal. Everyone knew that all manticores really wanted to do was brag about the last book they’d written. He’d been in enough of their dreams to know how inordinately proud they were once they figured out how to hold a quill in their paws and then form words with it on paper.
Hmmm. Maybe it was a mortal thing? Shrugging, Cait finally trotted to a stop in front of a large building with big stain glass windows. He’d expected it to be a quiet place, but instead it sounded as if a thousand banshees had been let loose.
“Er, do you have a case of killer aardvarks?” Because banshees tended to be more nocturnal.
“No, it’s much worse,” Ben groaned. He hung his head and Cait watched him curiously as he slumped and then pushed one of the monstrous front doors open.
“Benjamin!” A shrill voice called out. “You’re home!” A small pint-sized messy and colorful version of Ben came running through the stacks, disrupting an elderly man with a dozen scrolls and an young woman with a magnifying glass and a huge dusty tome.
“You have kids?”
“No, worse.” Ben looked about ready to face a firing squad. “Siblings.”
“Ben’s home!” The shrill call seemed to be some kind of multiplying spell because before Cait knew it, he was surrounded by munchkins. Some of them looked like Ben, some of them looked like no one Cait had ever seen. In fact, he was certain that one of them had wings.
“Hey guys.” The cacophony grew louder. “Okay, quiet down.” It went down maybe half a decibel. “Okay, shut up!” Dead silence.
“Wow. You’re good,” Cait whispered. All the kids turned to stare at him, fascinated. Cletus, curious now, walked out into the crowd, sniffing from kid to kid. Given the way that the all bent down to surround him, Cait figured that Cletus was quickly on his way to making friends with at least a dozen kids.
“Where’s Dad?”
“Oh, he went out into the field last week. He said he s’pects you to mind the masses.” A little girl with pigtails and a forked tongue informed Ben.
There were a couple of creative swears and the kids watched him with wide, wondrous eyes. “All right. I can handle this.” He looked about three seconds from breaking down. “Okay kids, Cait’s going to entertain you while I do research.”
And then the bastard abandoned him to a dozen rambunctious kids. Lucky for Ben, Cait had spent an entire childhood looking for playmates in other people’s dreams.
~*~
Cait was exhausted. But very, very happy. He didn’t know why Ben had been so upset when they’d returned. These kids were great! And the things that they knew and the games they’d played? Cait loved every second of it.
The only cloud hanging over it was that he’d originally came to the mortal realm to hang out with the brother that he’d grown up with in dreams.
“So, did you find anything out?” He asked, sneaking a look over Ben’s shoulder to look at the books spread out on the long table.
“Gahhh!” Ben jumped about half a foot, bumping Cait’s jaw in the process and helping him bite his lip hard enough to draw blood.
“Owff,” Cait backed up, dabbing at his mouth and coming back with blood covered fingers.
“Oh, I’m sorry, but you scared me half to death,” Ben got up out of his chair and pulled Cait’s head down to his level. The wizard frowned at him before experimentally poking at his lip. Cait held absolutely still, looking at Ben’s eyes as they studied the blood dripping from Cait’s lip. “Looks like it’s mostly bluster. Here, sit down.”
Ben practically shoved him into a chair. Nondescript though he might be, Ben was pretty in his own understated way. Cait noticed that he had a gentle touch as he gingerly pulled at his lip and his palm felt surprisingly nice against Cait’s cheek. “Am I gonna live?” He tried to grin, but winced slightly as the movement pulled at the cut.
“Yeah, here,” Ben reached over and pulled his staff up. He tapped it gently against Cait’s lip.
“Um, was something supposed to happen?” Cait finally asked as Ben stepped back and plopped into the chair next to Cait.
“How do you manage that? I noticed it back at the maze.” Ben looked absolutely perplexed.
“What?”
“Magic. It has little to no effect on you at all. If I’d touched any one of the kids, that cut would have been gone and they would have been complaining of magic tingles. With you? Nothing.”
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Well, except you don't get to lash me with wet noodles because I'm turning off comments. I'm a paranoid weirdo. ^_^;; So! Ha! Stealing those ten minutes of your life and there's nothing you can do to stop me! *bounces off to stupidify the world*
Also, I think most of this is the product of having watched Labyrinth six times in a row straight. X_x;;