Somethings wrong

[skylineburning]

I don't paint... craft, or even pursue a single thing that I want.

I think I'm depressed but I don't feel sad.
And I'm about to be a mom, which really makes me happy (now)
but i still feel like I've turned into someone that my 17 yearold self would have punched in the face.

I think I just figured it out.
Why was I happier when I was a struggling

Comments

[revenant_]

not to tell you a bunch of things you already know, but:
you should take some time to paint, craft, create. motherhood is the ultimate creative energy, but even to be able to write on livejournal, or in a journal, or anywhere (creative writing or no) express yourself more...it's important to keep that part of you alive, especially when that has been such a great part of your life. it's hard to let yourself be happy, i think. whenever i feel like i've got it all together i start feeling like i must be losing it.

[i_bite_evrythng]

i completely agree with whoever wrote above me.

and the answer to your question is because even though being a teenager sucks, when you're 16 or 17, life is still pretty simple. not easy, but simple.

maybe you ARE someone who your 17-year-old self would have punched in the face. but your 17-year-old self was not married and about to have a child. everything is different, everything has changed, and you are forced to grow up, which you did. you're still the same person deep down riah, just older and smarter.

i love you. go paint me something.

[way_parasitical]

because there were still so many possibilities