Apr 27, 2011 03:03
- 08:34:39: It's painfully clear the days I don't work because I basically stop tweeting entirely. But I've returned to fill your lives with joy.
- 09:08:54: I don't want to sound like a bitter angry person but sometimes I hate the sound of others laughing. OK, I don't mind sounding bitter & angry
- 09:11:53: I'm far too sleepy to go to this meeting in twenty minutes. Time to start my chant "just don't snore! just don't snore! just don't snore!"
- 09:16:15: I ate a Peep for it's sugary energy in desperation. At least I ate it properly by biting off it's head first.
- 09:19:56: Is being evil an essential part of being rich? If so, where the hell is all of my money?!
- 09:23:06: My local lunch truck keeps describing their monthly special with "explode in your mouth" and each time I see it I snicker like a 12yo boy.
- 09:26:48: If I had a car, I'd go pick myself up a fucking McGriddle right now and yes, the "fucking" was quite required for that description. F-ing A!
- 10:42:27: Survived my meeting, barely. Though I know if I wasn't actually sleep for parts, I looked like I was barely awake. Snores averted!
- 10:46:23: I'm not too far from hitting the big 15,000 tweet mark! Yes, I'm currently at 14,153 but really, that's close for me. #tweetoholic
- 10:49:54: When you've favorited a tweet you don't remember doing,it's telling you a follower did.Or as I put it, "See your friend's bad tweet taste"
- 11:17:52: I keep hearing a soft whisper behind other people's conversation. I'll worry when I start understanding what they're saying
- 12:45:20: Aw shit! It's taco tuesday! Time to fill my face with cheap ass tacos that will make me wish I'd never been this excited to begin with!
- 12:47:08: The only thing keeping me from ordering $20 worth of 3-for-$1 tacos is the shame. The terrible terrible shame.
- 12:49:02: Table manners are for when eating with others or if you can be seen clearly. At least that's how I justify eating mac n'cheese with my hands
- 12:50:59: I would quite honestly eat from a big bowl like a dog if I wasn't certain I was being watched.Damn you god,you voyeuristic judging bastard!
- 12:54:03: If people going into job interviews weren't doing so out of desperation, I think they'd be more creative about it. Example: male pasties
- 12:57:47: Been a long time since I've used a Mac.The next time I get my hands on one I'll put the mouse up to my face and say "Hello Computer"
- 13:11:50: If more vegetarian sandwiches came on a soft onion bread bun w/tons of avacado,I'd eat more of them.Hear that Veggie people!I'd eat more!
- 13:13:40: Between the onion bun, red onions and shitton of dijon mustard I put on this veggie sandwich, I won't be talking with many people today.
- 13:16:59: There's a path you take and a path untaken, the choice is up to you my friend.
- 13:18:34: Standing tall,on the wings of my dream. Rise & fall, on the wings of my dream.The rain & thunder.The wind & haze. I'm bound for better days.
- 13:20:33: I think I'm done being a creeper. I'm considering changing my avatar too. #minecraft
- 13:23:33: Isn't the world just one big litter box?
- 13:30:29: It's the creator of the world's most expensive book b-day today.John James Audubon's an inspiration.Maybe I'll make a People of America book
- 13:33:02: Sometimes I think people think they're smart when in reality they're just talking utter shit. Yeah, I'm talking about me!
- 13:34:28: I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life, but I can't help but notice you're doing it all wrong.
- 14:07:23: For those of you that don't know what my avatar is - http://youtu.be/DfYVtakQ-n8 (Youtube) & http://bit.ly/edwVQP - (Wiki)
- 16:17:37: I have a sex related question for the internet but I realize that by you being on the internet you're already too perverted for my question.
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