(no subject)
In this meme, you put ten characters in a reality show and see what happens when they battle to win!
First, pick your reality show.
What's the premise? THEY MUST SURVIVE UNTIL THE END IN THE TARDIS (yes, the Doctor did rent it out)
Who hosts it? HORATIO CAINE, BITCHES. (The Tenth Doctor makes guest appearances)
Who are the judges? PAULA, SIMON, RANDY Leslie Pool (10 Items Or Less), Hannibal Lecter (Hannibal series), Orochimaru (Naruto)
Now, pick your 10 contestants.
1) Dexter Morgan (Dexter)
2) Claire Bennet (Heroes)
3) Sylar (Heroes)
4) JD (Scrubs)
5) Turk (Scrubs)
6) Michael Scott (The Office)
7) Captain Jack Sparrow (PotC)
8) Isabella Swan (Twilight)
9) Edward Cullen (Twilight)
10) Dwight Shrute (The Office)
Episode 1 - A Two Hour Premiere Episode
Choose three of your contestants and excerpt their introductions to us via the 'confessional.'
Isabella Swan: I LOVE EDWARD AND I WILL NEVER, EVER, EVER LEAVE HIS SIDE. *twitch*
Edward Cullen: I... just really want Bella to leave me my side for once. *camera pans out, Bella is holding onto him with a creepy smile on her face*
Dwight Shrute: I don't want to ruin anything by saying that I win but... *stares at camera with an intense face* I'm going to win this competition. Nobody will stand in my way. Nobody.
Someone decides before the competition even begins that they're not into this after all and quits. Who is it and what's their goodbye-cruel-world speech?
Captain Jack Sparrow leaves when he sees Hannibal on the judges panel, and also once he sees Orochimaru. He leaves in silence, not wanting to be on a show with a cannibal and a man who looks like he's in drag. "Later, mates." is all he says.
The 9 remaining contestants move into their new "home." What's it like? What are the features? How's it decorated?
It's the TARDIS. When the contestants see it, they all go "WE AREN'T GONNA FIT" but when one of them enters, they realize it's bigger than it looks (obviously). The Doctor has added terrible decor on purpose that is said to have made people homicidal in the early 1600s.
There are three bedrooms with three beds each. How does the process of choosing rooms go? Who sleeps where?
JD, Turk, and Michael decide on a dance-off with a three-man(/woman) team. The ones in the winning team belong to a room and choose people one by one like in dodgeball. Surprisingly, JD, Claire, and Sylar won the dance off. JD chooses Turk and Michael, Claire chooses Bella and Edward, and Sylar has to have Dexter and Dwight.
There's still an elimination - that one person who it's obvious from the start is fooling themselves to think they even stood a chance. Who is it?
The judges all agree that Isabella Swan needs to go, but Claire doesn't want to be stuck in a room with a vampire who constantly tells Bella she smells nice and gives Claire lustful looks, especially after Sylar 'accidentally' stuffed Claire's hand in the garbage disposer. Isabella leaves, much to the chagrin of Claire.
Episode 2 - The First Challenge
The first challenge is something that everyone there ought to be good at already. What is it, and who's the best at it?
Whistling (Leslie's idea), and, to the surprise of everybody, Dwight is the best. He gives Michael a creepy look and says, "It passes the time when I get rid of the bodies."
Who's the one person who's just awful and horrible and ought to be sent home right now?
Michael Scott.
Who's the fair-to-middling person who gets sent home instead in a terrible miscarriage of justice?
Edward Cullen, much to the relief of Claire.
What's their bitchy parting shot to the confessional camera?
"I'M TOO GOOD FOR THIS SHOW ANYWAY." *storms off*
Episode 3 - Speaking of Bitchy...
Who's the arrogant, self-centered asswipe in the house and who is that asswipe rubbing the wrong way?
Dwight, and he's making Sylar irritated. Really, really irritated.
To everyone's chagrin, the asswipe wins the next challenge. What is it and how on earth does that contestant pull off a win?
It's a CPR challenge, and Dwight wins it for pointing out that there is no heart (meaning there is no pulse) and Hannibal talks to Horatio to let him win because he wore the face of the dummy when he finished.
A snippet from the confessional of one of the jealous contenders:
JD: I'm a doctor, I should have won this challenge... It's only because I was singing "Stayin' Alive" that they didn't let me win! They hate that song, I can tell! I'm going to report them...
Who does the worst in that challenge and goes home?
Claire - ironically - does the worst and is sent home, making Sylar a very sad cookie. JD and Turk attempt to make him feel better, and accidentally end up pushing him off the roof of the fifty story building. Everyone is surprised when Sylar comes back up and decide to leave him be.
Episode 4 - Party Time
The remaining six contestants go out to dinner. Who...
...dances on the table? Turk.
....kisses another contestant? Michael Scott (he kisses Sylar, who promptly proceeds to throw him across the room until Dwight comes to Michael's defense)
...can't hold their liquor? JD.
...sits on the sidelines looking annoyed? Dexter (he's trying to figure out who to kill and the camera keeps panning over to him when he makes a move)
Surprise double elimination: One of the partiers gets thrown out for embarrassing the competition's good name. Who is it?
Sylar. At the restaurant, he met somebody who had special powers and kills them... in front of the entire restaurant. Horatio Caine kicks him out of the challenge, using his sunglasses to intimidate Sylar.
Who else gets the ax this week?
Dexter, for being gone for ten hours and showing up, sweaty. He missed the challenge (squirt gun fight) and is therefore axed. He couldn't be happier.
Episode 5 - Gettin' Down
With only four people left, things are roomier in the house, but you couldn't tell it to these two. Who's joined at the hips and steaming it up in the hot tub every night?
JD and Turk. They get into random tickle fights, jump into each other's arms, sleep with each other on the same bed, and take showers together.
How do the others feel about that?
AAAAAWWWWWWKKKKKWARRRRRDDD. Especially since JD and Turk are best friends and still manage to be more touchy-feely than a couple all the time.
Who has a personal crisis and is eliminated after turning in a lackluster performance because they're preoccupied with *gasp* real life?
Turk. Carla misses him too much and he can't let his baby be alone. His goodbye to JD: "Goodbye, Vanilla Bear, you'll always be in my heart!" "So long, my Chocolate Bear! I'll never forget you!"
Episode 6 - Three's Company
It's down to three. Which two gang up on the third, and why? What do they do?
Michael and JD team up on Dwight after he changes the channel when they are watching "The Happy Peppy Unicorn Show" to something about Hitler. They prank him constantly, and even stage a murder scene the next morning!
An excerpt from the confessional cam of that contestant crying into their Cheerios about being victimized:
Dwight: I'm not crying... *sniff* It's just been raining... on my face. *pushes camera away* Go away and let me eat my Cheerios in peace! *singing sadly* Milk and... cereal, milk and... cereal... cereal and milk... cereal and milk.
Does the victim survive the next elimination, breaking up the Dynamic Duo, or do they go home, pitting former friends against each other?
JD goes home after Dwight sabotages his canoe, making him sink in the pond and therefore disqualifying him. JD bitches about it and even calls Dr. Cox, crying. Dr. Cox then yells at Dwight for making JD call him in the middle of the night for something so idiotic and hangs up. Michael and JD have a really heartfelt goodbye, with a lot of tears and hugging - mostly on Michael's part.
Episode 7 - Grand Finale
How do the final two contestants feel about their chances to win?
Dwight feels that he will win, even if he has to kill Michael.
Michael feels that he will win, and if he doesn't then there is a good chance that Dwight will either be fired, demoted, or replaced.
What's the big shocker of the final competition?
THEY MUST TRAVEL BACK IN TIME WITH A DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION GAME AND PLAY IT WHILE THE TITANIC SETS OFF ON ITS MAIDEN VOYAGE. THE PERSON WITH THE HIGHEST SCORE WINS!
What's the factor that puts the winner over the top, or does the loser have a totally embarrassing moment that ruins their chances?
Michael (the loser) trips and falls to his near death in the Atlantic. Ten saves him, and Michael forfeits. Dwight wins by default/
Finally, announce the winner and tell them what they've won!
AND THE WINNER IS DWIGHT SHRUTE.
THEY'VE WON A DEMOTION/LOSS OF JOOOOOOOOOOOOOB!
Oh, and also one million dollars (give or take $999,995).