The Ever-Changing Orientation of Ryan Evans: a parody
My sister and I have a joke about how Disney turned Ryan from practically all-out gay to a loving boyfriend for Kelsi. It is presented in script format, because that is how we tell it to people. And because script format is awesome.
The Ever-Orientation of Ryan Evans: a parody by SMARTALIENQT and PirateRina717
Cast List:
Writer #1: The leader.
Writer #2: Second-in-command.
Writer #3: The bumbling lackey of #2.
Writer #4 (aka The Rookie): The rookie. Also known as The Smart One.
Hackers #1, #2, #3: Read fanfiction while they're supposed to be epically spying.
Olesya Rulin and Lucas Grabeel: Enough said. Happen to be in the right place at the right time, because we are the writers of this parody and can do whatever we want. :)
Larry The Awesome Janitor: Responsible for everything we can't explain.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Before High School Musical, in the secret lab...
Writer #1: Okay, guys, Disney wants us to make a movie.
Writer #2: AGAIN? We just did one! And it flopped!
Writer #1: Our stuff always flops, stupid. Okay, so, since we know it will flop anyway, let's just go crazy.
Writer #3: Okay... how about a gay guy?
Writer #1: NO! We're Disney! We're the good guys, defending television from the forces of evil!
Writer #3: Okaaay... how about an implied gay guy? And he's not the main character, he's actually... the bad guy?
Writer #2: But that might mean that we're saying that all gay guys are evil.
Writer #3: What about an implied gay henchman?
Writer #1: Okay, we'll go with that.
After High School Musical, in the secret lab...
Writer #1: Oh crap.
Writer #2: We put the gay guy in...
Writer #3: ...and now it's a major pre-teen phenomenon.
Writers #1, #2, #3: GAH!
Writer #1: Ok, guys, we need to find a girlfriend for the gay guy.
Writers #2 + #3: WHO?!
Writer #1: *flipping through cast photos* Okay, not Gabriella... not Taylor... what about that small person?
Writer #2: We already implied that she's with Jason.
Writer #1: That was dumb.
Writer #3: What about that random girl who hip-hopped last time? Did we even give her a name?
Writer #2: Yeah. I don't know why, though. We didn't give one to the skater dude.
Writer #3: Who's idea was it to name her?
Larry the Awesome Janitor: *walks by*
Writer #3: So, what was her name? Martha Cox?
Writer #2: Yeah, and we'll still imply he's gay with baseball, because everyone knows that baseball players are gay.
Writer #1: Okay, we'll go with that.
After High School Musical 2, in the secret spy section...
Epic Hacker #1: *into epic walkie talkie* Epically-Challenged, this is Dark-Abyss... we have a problem.
-ten minutes later-
Writers #1, #2, #3: WHAT?!
Epic Hacker #1: There's this thing called... fanfiction. *cue Mission Impossible Theme*
Writers #1, #2, #3: WHAT?!
Epic Hacker #2: It's this thing where people go online and write about HSM. And guys... some people aren't buying the gay guy.
Writers #1, #2, #3: WHAT?!
Epic Hacker #3: Well, they put him with Chad because of that thing with the switched clothes-
Writer #2: I knew we shouldn't have done that.
Epic Hacker #3: -and now they put him with Martha only because we implied it.
Writer #1: Oh crap.
Writer #2: You can say that again.
Writer #1: Oh crap.
Writer #2: You know, that was supposed to be rhetorical...
Writer #1: Shut up! So we need to switch the couples...
Writer #2: We can't switch Gabriella or Taylor...
Writer #3: Who's left?
*Lucas Grabeel walks by with Olesya Rulin, epically carrying coffee*
Writer #1: I HAVE IT!
*angel chorus, stream of heavenly light touches head*
Writer #1: *looks up* Larry, could you get that hole in the ceiling fixed?
Larry the Awesome Janitor: Yup. *exit Larry the Awesome Janitor*
Writer #1: Okay, here's what we do. We put Kelsi and Ryan together! It just makes so much sense! They're both theater people... take this down, #2...
Writer #2: On it...
Writer #1: They both are under Sharpay's thumb... they're friends... they both wear hats... incidentally, who put in the hats?
Larry the Awesome Janitor: *waves from ladder*
Writer #3: Well, it has to be forced, since he went with Martha for the entire second movie...
Writer #2: How about Sharpay? She's forceful.
Writer #1: BRILLIANT!
Writer #4 (aka The Rookie): So, we're switching couples because the fanfic people want us to and it's really what we should have done in the first place?
Writers #1, #2, #3: EXACTLY!
The End. Fin. Конец. Au revior. Der ende. Adios. You get the idea.
The Ever-Orientation of Ryan Evans: a parody by SMARTALIENQT and PirateRina717
Cast List:
Writer #1: The leader.
Writer #2: Second-in-command.
Writer #3: The bumbling lackey of #2.
Writer #4 (aka The Rookie): The rookie. Also known as The Smart One.
Hackers #1, #2, #3: Read fanfiction while they're supposed to be epically spying.
Olesya Rulin and Lucas Grabeel: Enough said. Happen to be in the right place at the right time, because we are the writers of this parody and can do whatever we want. :)
Larry The Awesome Janitor: Responsible for everything we can't explain.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Before High School Musical, in the secret lab...
Writer #1: Okay, guys, Disney wants us to make a movie.
Writer #2: AGAIN? We just did one! And it flopped!
Writer #1: Our stuff always flops, stupid. Okay, so, since we know it will flop anyway, let's just go crazy.
Writer #3: Okay... how about a gay guy?
Writer #1: NO! We're Disney! We're the good guys, defending television from the forces of evil!
Writer #3: Okaaay... how about an implied gay guy? And he's not the main character, he's actually... the bad guy?
Writer #2: But that might mean that we're saying that all gay guys are evil.
Writer #3: What about an implied gay henchman?
Writer #1: Okay, we'll go with that.
After High School Musical, in the secret lab...
Writer #1: Oh crap.
Writer #2: We put the gay guy in...
Writer #3: ...and now it's a major pre-teen phenomenon.
Writers #1, #2, #3: GAH!
Writer #1: Ok, guys, we need to find a girlfriend for the gay guy.
Writers #2 + #3: WHO?!
Writer #1: *flipping through cast photos* Okay, not Gabriella... not Taylor... what about that small person?
Writer #2: We already implied that she's with Jason.
Writer #1: That was dumb.
Writer #3: What about that random girl who hip-hopped last time? Did we even give her a name?
Writer #2: Yeah. I don't know why, though. We didn't give one to the skater dude.
Writer #3: Who's idea was it to name her?
Larry the Awesome Janitor: *walks by*
Writer #3: So, what was her name? Martha Cox?
Writer #2: Yeah, and we'll still imply he's gay with baseball, because everyone knows that baseball players are gay.
Writer #1: Okay, we'll go with that.
After High School Musical 2, in the secret spy section...
Epic Hacker #1: *into epic walkie talkie* Epically-Challenged, this is Dark-Abyss... we have a problem.
-ten minutes later-
Writers #1, #2, #3: WHAT?!
Epic Hacker #1: There's this thing called... fanfiction. *cue Mission Impossible Theme*
Writers #1, #2, #3: WHAT?!
Epic Hacker #2: It's this thing where people go online and write about HSM. And guys... some people aren't buying the gay guy.
Writers #1, #2, #3: WHAT?!
Epic Hacker #3: Well, they put him with Chad because of that thing with the switched clothes-
Writer #2: I knew we shouldn't have done that.
Epic Hacker #3: -and now they put him with Martha only because we implied it.
Writer #1: Oh crap.
Writer #2: You can say that again.
Writer #1: Oh crap.
Writer #2: You know, that was supposed to be rhetorical...
Writer #1: Shut up! So we need to switch the couples...
Writer #2: We can't switch Gabriella or Taylor...
Writer #3: Who's left?
*Lucas Grabeel walks by with Olesya Rulin, epically carrying coffee*
Writer #1: I HAVE IT!
*angel chorus, stream of heavenly light touches head*
Writer #1: *looks up* Larry, could you get that hole in the ceiling fixed?
Larry the Awesome Janitor: Yup. *exit Larry the Awesome Janitor*
Writer #1: Okay, here's what we do. We put Kelsi and Ryan together! It just makes so much sense! They're both theater people... take this down, #2...
Writer #2: On it...
Writer #1: They both are under Sharpay's thumb... they're friends... they both wear hats... incidentally, who put in the hats?
Larry the Awesome Janitor: *waves from ladder*
Writer #3: Well, it has to be forced, since he went with Martha for the entire second movie...
Writer #2: How about Sharpay? She's forceful.
Writer #1: BRILLIANT!
Writer #4 (aka The Rookie): So, we're switching couples because the fanfic people want us to and it's really what we should have done in the first place?
Writers #1, #2, #3: EXACTLY!
The End. Fin. Конец. Au revior. Der ende. Adios. You get the idea.