095. Drowning [100 SuJu Fic Challenge]
No idea what I’m writing here. My law teacher, Mr. Awesomeness, was talking about Orders of Protections and stuff, and I based this on what he said. LOL; I know nothing about this, so forgive me if I get something wrong. Really, I fail on angsty stories. I end up forgetting the endings, so I just come up with another one to replace it.
Title: Order of Protection
Theme: Drowning
Pairing: Hankyung x Heechul
Order Of Protection. The letters scrawled across the page in big, bold letters of death. Hankyung glared at her husband with defiance glittering in her eyes, also swirling with confusion and pain. Why had he done this to her?
She had been driven to this decision - it was Heechul’s fault, not hers. Domestic violence. Emotional and physical abuse - and, oh the tragedy, she was pregnant. She placed her wavering signature on the forms, holding in her tears, glancing back up at Heechul in regret. This document strictly forbade him from getting in within fifty feet of her, which in a way, she was grateful for. There wouldn’t be any more pain, right?
Wrong.
There would still be pain - with the withdrawal of Heechul. She loved him, despite all the physical pain she had to go through. It wasn’t his fault. It was just stress and desperation taking its toll on him. “Chullie...,” Hankyung croaked reaching out toward her husband, only to draw back when she realized they could never be together anymore. “I-I mean, Heechul sshi... I hope you live a prosperous life,” she whispered, trying to gain composure.
“Well,” the man murmured grudgingly, gaze traveling unintentionally to the swell of his former wife’s stomach, “I hope you and the child will live a good life too.” And that was it. No hugs. No last kisses.
Only the lingering memory of their past, the mirage that still exists in front of Hankyung, to which she reaches out with wistfulness. Shaking her head to snap herself out of her fugue, she patted her stomach with a small, halfhearted smile. “Let’s bring you home, okay?”
-Three Years Later-
Hankyung had left her daughter at home with the babysitter; now she was browsing through the racks at the local supermarket, contemplating whether to buy one brand of paper towel or another, when a familiar voice caused her to perk up. With no one in sight, she shrugged to herself, returning to the puzzling conundrum.
“Hankyung...”
And there it was again. Her imagination, probably. Or one of her childhood friends.
A hand was planted firmly on her shoulder, resulting in her jumping up, startled. She gazed up at the newcomer, only to stare into those dark eyes, nearly hidden in bangs that she had grown accustomed to. “Heechul?” she breathed, taking a tiny, unconscious step backward.
“You remember me?” A hint of a smile was on his lips, but it transformed into a smirk - something cold and distant.
Hankyung took another step back, slightly trembling, and breath coming out in ragged gasps - though she was unsure why. “Y-You’re not supposed to be here.” She was on the verge of tears as sets of flashback after flashback replayed in her mind.
“Hannie,” Heechul responded, drawing out the H in a long breath, so that it ghosted against the other’s pale skin. “I missed you,” he whispered into her ear.
She jerked away, desperately swinging head from side to side; why wasn’t anyone there? It was a supermarket; it should be crowded!
But no. She was all alone. All alone with him. “Didn’t you miss me?” This was all he had to say to make Hankyung turn on her heels and just speed off. She just didn’t care as pain started to engulf her legs, as the wind blew hair into her eyes, as there was a clap of thunder. She just had to get away.
“Wait!” Heechul called, hot on her heels.
“Didn’t you miss me?” The words were imprinted in her mind, a constant echo in her ears as she chose a random path. Stones were kicked out of the way, dust clogging up the trail.
She just had to get away.
Hankyung skidded to a halt as the ground gave way sharply to a cliff. Heechul had finally caught up with her, barely panting. “Hannie,” he repeated once again, lips brushing against her ear, to which she snapped her head away from. “Come back to me.”
Oh how she wanted to, but this was just all too much. Before her was the man that had caused her such massive pain, the man who she had left, the man who she could have raised her daughter with, the man who she had - and still - loved. And so, Hankyung took a step backward. “Not within fifty feet,” Hankyung blubbered, sweat and tears streaming down her face, the salty liquid combining to a point where one could not know which was which. “Not within fifty feet.”
Heechul reached for her, a silent plea in his eyes. “Please, Hankyung...”
She took another step back.
“Please.”
And another.
Until life began to fade into nothing. With air rushing all around her, Hankyung had to erupt into bittersweet laughter. She had escaped him temporarily - but she would never completely escape. He was there, etched into her memories, present in the perpetual wounds she bore. It was guilt that kept her going - guilt and love.
Maybe, if she hadn’t signed that document, things would have been better.
I’m sorry, Heechul. This is all my fault.
It’s not your fault. It’s mine. I should’ve made an effort to keep our relationship strong, despite the times you would hurt me. It’s just - I know I’m selfish in saying this - but I don’t want you to hurt me anymore. I don’t want you to hurt me emotionally anymore. Personally, I think it’s worse than being battered physically. It’s because physically, the wounds are only skin deep. Emotionally, the scars are to the bone. I didn’t think this would hurt you as well - and well, I can’t stand to see you in this state. It would be the best if I never existed. Just remember, Heechul, that whatever I say or do, I’ll always love you.
And as somber sky transitioned to some murky substance, she closed her eyes and thought of Heechul, her daughter, Order of Protections, and drowning.
Hankyung jolted up from his bed, a few beads of perspiration already accumulated on his forehead. “Whoa. What was that?” he asked himself, averting his gaze to the figure snuggled up next to him.
“What’s up, Hannie?” Heechul mumbled groggily, not bothering to open his eyes. “Nightmare?”
“I had this weird dream where I was a girl and you were my husband and I ended up committing suicide in the end.”
Heechul wrinkled his nose, turning the other way, pulling the sheets over his head. “I hate pointless love stories like that. Why do people need to suicide over such little things anyway?”
Hankyung shrugged in agreement. “I know, right? Must have been something out of the twilight zone. Though... it all seemed so real.”
Heechul groaned, kicking Hankyung’s butt in irritation. “You’re all wet. Must have been one scary dream, huh?”
“I didn’t sweat that much.” Upon further examination, he quirked an eyebrow. “That’s not sweat. It’s... seawater.”