“What. The. Hell. What are we doing here?” the 17-year-old curly-haired brunette barked at his 19-year-old friend. “How could you get a job, not tell me, and then FREAKING STUFF ME IN A CAR AND TAKE ME HERE? I’LL SUE -”
His foreign companion - much taller by comparison - silenced him with a sharp nudge to his ribcage as the manager approached. “Welcome to Mittens’ Beach House! I assume you are the one called Mi who applied for a position here?”
Zhou Mi flashed her one of his infamous grins. “Yes. This is my friend Kyuhyun.” He stumbled awkwardly over the foreign name. “As you can see, he’s not really happy to be here.” Kyuhyun opened his mouth to protest, but before he could utter a sound, Zhou Mi swiftly stepped on his foot. “But I’m sure he will soon! So um - we assume that you’re Mittens?” Kyuhyun snorted at the sudden question.
“Oh no,” she chuckled, “Mittens is my cat. Anyway, I’d like you two to head over to the beach and clean up the debris there.”
Once she had left, Kyuhyun stared wordlessly at her retreating back for a few moments. He snorted. “That woman is absolutely crazy. Almost as crazy as you.” Zhou Mi looked put out for a split second before he latched his hand onto his arm and dragged him along. “There’s no way I’m helping you.”
“But Kui Xian!”
“Don’t you ‘but Kui Xian’ me, Mi. You’re the one who forced me here in the first place, so you’re going to be-” Kyuhyun began, but before he could continue, he was interrupted by a sudden ear-splitting scream.
“Kui Xian!” Zhou Mi squeaked urgently. “There’s a beetle on your shirt!”
The latter raised an eyebrow. “The Beatles are long dead by now, Mimi.”
Zhou Mi took several steps back, enough to distance himself from his six-legged fear. “You’re not funny, Kui Xian. I meant a beetle. As in a big bug thingie with horns?”
“You know, if you’re prepared to faint every time you see any that scuttles on six or more legs, why did you apply for a job here? It’s a beach house. This place is teeming with them.”
Zhou Mi huffed indignantly, crossing his arms across his chest in an attempt to maintain his calm composure. “It’s called a beach house. I thought it was a beach in a house.”
“You idiot. A beach house is a house on the beach.”
“Well how was I supposed to know? I don’t know, I’m not very good at Korean!”
Meanwhile, somewhere in an ice cream parlor, Hankyung sneezes onto Heechul’s triple-scoop napoleon ice cream. Heechul lets out a cry of dismay and the cone promptly plops onto the sidewalk. Hankyung chuckles nervously as the elder faced him with a murderous gleam in his eyes.
Kyuhyun hastily raked his broom against the sand. “This is pointless. How are we supposed to clean up the sand when it’s supposed to be messy? Zhou Mi, remind me to whack you on the head with a shovel the next time you get one of these crazy money-making schemes.”
“I thought it’d be different this time. Sheesh. Stop asking me questions.” Zhou Mi coughed as a plume of dust swirled up into the humid air. “You did that on purpose!”
Ignoring him completely, Kyuhyun mused, “Remember the last 10 jobs you’ve gotten?”
“Uh… no…?”
“Do I have to play the montage for you?”
MONTAGE TIME :DD (Background music: No Other)
Zhou Mi is perched precariously on top of a ladder, bucket of white paint in one hand and a brush in the other. “I got you under my skin~” he sings in accented English before proceeding to dip the tool in the paint. He distractedly slathers the house with heavy strokes whilst Kyuhyun is somewhere below him, mashing buttons on his DS.
Let’s just say the wind picks up, and Zhou Mi, surprised by the sudden change in temperature, loosens his grip on the bucket. It splatters on an unsuspecting Kyu, covering him from head to toe. “MOMMY!” a passing 5-year-old cries, pointing to the dripping Kyuhyun and clinging onto his mother. “IT’S A GHOST!” They speed-walk past.
A 9-year-old girl wanders by, before laughing hysterically, “AHAHA. CUM.” She continues to walk by as if nothing happened.
Several hours of sweating and lecturing later, the two step back to watch their (Zhou Mi’s) hard work. “Wait. What. The. Heck? Why did you paint the windows too?” Meanwhile, the voice of a little kid inside the house is heard.
“MOMMERZ! IT’S SNOWING!"
Mommy Mimi is trying to calm down the infant he’s babysitting. He’s screaming and wailing like a fire engine (the kid, not Mimi), and despite the 19-year-old’s countless efforts, he refuses to stop crying. “Kui Xian?”
“What?” Kyuhyun looks up from the book he’s reading. Immediately, the little boy’s tears stop flowing, and he looks at Kyuhyun in rapt attention, seemingly fascinated.
“Aw, he likes you,” Zhou Mi coos as the child reaches forward toward Kyuhyun’s face.
Their ease is only ephemeral, as he grabs onto Kyuhyun’s hair and yanks.
“So what do I do? Just throw all this stuff in this pot?” Zhou Mi queries, apparently perplexed as he surveys the food lined up before him.
The manager waves absentmindedly. “Yea, sure, whatever,” he mutters before exiting.
The day ends with people running screaming from the restaurant as it bursts into flames.
“Oh. Right.” Zhou Mi chuckled nervously, snatching a plastic wrapper off a table before promptly depositing it in the trash. “Don’t worry, I promise nothing will happen this time.” He raised his broom triumphantly before continuing to sweep.
Kyuhyun followed suit before nonchalantly tossing out, “There’s a cockroach on your broom, Mimi.”
There’s a lot of shrieking, lots of flailing and spazzing, and the poor little insect is flung into someone’s hair. Chaos follows afterwards, and the two are sent home. “If you keep this up, Zhou Mi, you’ll probably be internationally recognized.”
Zhou Mi scoffed, flicking him playfully in the head. “That’s ridiculous.”
As soon as they leave, the nameless manager of Mittens’ Beach House tapes up a Wanted poster with Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun’s smiling faces on it.
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